The Tantra Vision, Vol 1

Talks on the Royal Song of Saraha

English Discourse series

21 April 1977 am in Buddha Hall

THE ROYAL SONG OF SARAHA
I BOW DOWN TO NOBLE MANJUSRI
I BOW DOWN TO HIM WHO HAS CONQUERED THE FINITE AS CALM WATER LASHED BY WIND
TURNS INTO WAVES AND ROLLERS,
SO THE KING THINKS OF SARAHA
IN MANY WAYS, ALTHOUGH ONE MAN.
TO A FOOL WHO SQUINTS
ONE LAMP IS AS TWO,
WHERE SEEN AND SEER ARE NOT TWO, AH! THE MIND WORKS ON THE THINGNESS OF THEM BOTH.
THOUGH THE HOUSE-LAMPS HAVE BEEN LIT,
THE BLIND LIVE ON IN THE DARK.
THOUGH SPONTANEITY IS ALL-ENCOMPASSING AND CLOSE,
TO THE DELUDED IT REMAINS ALWAYS FAR AWAY.
THOUGH THERE MAY BE MANY RIVERS, THEY ARE ONE IN THE SEA,
THOUGH THERE MAY BE MANY LIES, ONE TRUTH WILL CONQUER ALL.
WHEN ONE SUN APPEARS, THE DARK,
HOWEVER DEEP, WILL VANISH.

GAUTAM THE BUDDHA IS THE GREATEST MASTER who has ever walked on the earth. Christ is a great Master, so is Krishna, so is Mahavir, so is Mohammed, and many more - but Buddha still remains the greatest Master. Not that his achievement of Enlightenment is greater than anybody else's - Enlightenment is neither less nor more - he has attained to the same quality of consciousness as Mahavir, as Christ, as Zarathustra, as Lao Tzu.

There is no question of any Enlightened man being more Enlightened than anybody else. But as far as his being aMaster isconcerned, Buddha is incomparable -because, through him, thousandsof people have attained to Enlightenment. It has never happened with any other Master. His line has been the most fruitful line. His family has been the most creative family up to now. He is like a big tree with so many branches - and EACH branch has been fruitful; each branch is loaded with many fruits.

Mahavir remained a local phenomenon. Krishna fell into the hands of scholars and was lost. Christ was completely destroyed by the priests. Much could have happened, but it didn't happen. Buddha has been tremendously fortunate in this. Not that the priests have not tried, not that the scholars have not tried they have done all that they can do but somehow Buddha's teaching was devised in such a way that it could not be destroyed. It is still alive. Even after twenty-five centuries, a few flowers come on his tree, it still blooms. Spring comes, and still it releases fragrance, it still bears fruit.

Saraha is also a fruit of the same tree. Saraha was born about two centuries after Buddha. He was in the direct line of a different branch. One branch moves from Mahakashyap to Bodhidharma and Zenisborn-and it is still full of flowers, that branch. Another branch movesfrom Buddhatohisson, Rahul Bhadra, and from Rahul Bhadra to Sri Kirti, and from Sri Kirti to Saraha, and from Saraha to Nargarjuna - that is the Tantra branch. It is still bearing fruit in Tibet.

Tantra converted Tibet, and Saraha is the founder of Tantra just as Bodhidharma is the founder of Zen. Bodhidharma conquered China, Korea, Japan. Saraha conquered Tibet.

These Songs ofSarahaareofgreatbeauty. Theyare the veryfoundation ofTantra. You willhaveto understand first the Tantra attitude towards life, the Tantra vision of life.
The most basic thing about Tantra is this - and very radical, revolutionary, rebellious - the basic vision is that the world is not divided into the lower and the higher, but that the world is one piece. The higher and the lower are holding hands. The higher includes the lower, and the lower includes the higher. The higher is hidden in the lower - so the lower has not to be denied, has not to be condemned, has not to be destroyed or killed. The lower has to be transformed. The lower has to be allowed to move upwards... and the lower becomes the higher. There is no unbridgeable gap between the Devil and God - the Devil is carrying God deep down in his heart. Once that heart starts functioning, the Devil becomes God.

That is the reason why the very root of the word'devil' means the same as'divine'. The word'devil' comes from'divine'; it is the Divine not yet evolved, that's all. Not that the Devil is against the Divine, not that the Devil is trying to destroy the Divine - in fact, the Devil is trying to find the Divine. The Devil is on the way towards the Divine; it is not the enemy, it is the seed. The Divine is the tree fully in bloom and the Devil is the seed - but the tree is hidden in the seed. And the seed is not against the tree; in fact, the tree cannot exist if the seed is not there. And the tree is not against the seed - they are in deep friendship, they are together.
Poison and nectar are two phases of the same energy, so are life and death - and so is everything: day and night, love and hate, sex and superconsciousness.

Tantra says: Never condemn anything - the attitude of condemnation is the stupid attitude. By condemning something, you are denying yourself the possibility that would have become available toyou ifyou hadevolved thelower. Don'tcondemn themud, becausethelotusishiddenin themud; use the mud to produce the lotus. Of course, the mud is not the lotus yet, but it can be. And the creative person, the religious person, will help the mud to release its lotus so that the lotus can be freed from the mud.

SarahaisthefounderoftheTantravision. Itisoftremendousimport, and particularlyforthepresent moment in human history, because a new man is striving to be born, a new consciousness is knocking on the doors. And the future is going to be that of Tantra, because now no more dual attitudes can hold man's mind.
They have tried for centuries and they have crippled man and they have made man guilty. And they have not made man free they have made man a prisoner. And they have not made man happy either; they have made man very miserable. They have condemned everything from food to sex they have condemned everything; from relationship to friendship they have condemned all. Love is condemned, body is condemned, mind is condemned. They have not left a single inch for you to stand on; they have taken away all and man is hanging, just hanging.

This state of man cannot be tolerated any more. Tantra can give you a new perspective hence I have chosen Saraha.

Saraha is one of my most loved persons. It is my old love affair.

You may not even have heard the name of Saraha, but Saraha is one of the great benefactors of humanity. If I were to count on my fingers ten benefactors of humanity, Saraha would be one of those ten. If I were to count five, then too I would not be able to drop Saraha.
BEFORE WE ENTER into these Songs of Saraha, a few things about Saraha's life: Saraha was born in Vidarbha; Vidarbha is part of Maharashtra, very close to Poona. He was born when King Mahapala was the ruler. He was the son of a very learned Brahmin who was in the court of King Mahapala. The father was in the court so the young man was also in the court. He had four other brothers; they were all great scholars, and he was the youngest and the most intelligent of them all. His fame was spreading all over the country, by and by, and the king was almost enchanted by his superb intelligence.

The four brothers were also very great scholars, but nothing to be compared with Saraha. As they became mature, the four got married. The king was willing to give his own daughter to Saraha, but Saraha wanted to renounce all - Saraha wanted to become a sannyasin. The king was hurt; he tried to persuade Saraha - he was so beautiful and he was so intelligent and he was such a handsome young man. His fame was spreading all overthe country,and becauseofhim Mahapala'scourtwas becoming famous. The king was very much worried, and he didn't want this young man to become a sannyasin. He wanted to protect him, he wanted to give him all comfort possible - he was ready to do anything for him. But Saraha persisted and the permission had to be given - he became a sannyasin, he became a disciple of Sri Kirti.

Sri Kirti is in the direct line of Buddha - Gautam Buddha, then his son Rahul Bhadra, and then comes Sri Kirti. There are just two Masters between Saraha and Buddha; he is not very far away from Buddha. The tree must have been still very, very green; the vibe must have been still very, very alive. Buddha had just left. The climate must have been full of his fragrance.

The king was shocked, because Saraha was a Brahmin. If he wanted to become a sannyasin he should have become a Hindu sannyasin, but he chose a Buddhist Master. Saraha's family was also very much worried. In fact, they all became enemies... this was not right. And then things became even worse - we will come to know about it.
Saraha's original name was'Rahul', the name given by his father. We will come to know how he became Saraha - that is a beautiful story. When he went to Sri Kirti, the first thing Sri Kirti told him was: ”Forget all your Vedas and all your learning and all that nonsense.” It was difficult for Saraha, but he was ready to stake anything. Something in the presence of Sri Kirti had attracted him. Sri Kirti was a great magnet. He dropped all his learning, he became unlearned again.
This is one of the greatest renunciations: it is easy to renounce wealth, it is easy to renounce a great kingdom,butto renounce knowledge isthe mostdifficultthing in the world. In the first place, how to renounceit? Itisthereinsideyou. You can escapefrom yourkingdom,you can go to the Himalayas, you can distribute your wealth - how can you renounce your knowledge? And then it is too painful to become ignorantagain. Itis the greatest austerity there is,to become ignorant again, to become again innocentlike a child... buthe was ready.

Years passed and, by and by, he erased all that he had known. He became a great meditator. Just the same as he had started to become very famous as a great scholar, now his fame started spreading as a great meditator. People started coming from far and away just to have a glimpse of thisyoung man who had become soinnocent,like afresh leaf,orlike dew-drops on the grass in the morning.

One day while Saraha was meditating, suddenly he saw a vision - a vision that there was a woman in the marketplace who was going to be his real teacher. Sri Kirti has just put him on the way, but the real teaching is to come from a woman. Now, this too has to be understood. It is only Tantra that has never been male chauvinistic. In fact, to go into Tantra you will need the cooperation of a wise woman; without a wise woman you will not be able to enter into the complex world ofT antra.
Hesawavision: a woman therein the marketplace. Sofirstawoman. Second -in the marketplace. Tantra thrives in the marketplace, in the thick of life. It is not an attitude of negation; it is utter positivity. He stood up. Sri Kirti asked him, ”Where are you going?” And he said, ”You have shown me the Path. You took my learning away. You have done half the work - you have cleaned my slate. Now Iam ready todo the other half.” With the blessings of Sri Kirti who was laughing, he went away.
He went to the marketplace. He was surprised: he really found the woman that he had seen in the vision. The woman was making an arrow;she was an arrowsmith woman.
The third thing to be remembered about Tantra: it says the more cultured, the more civilized a person, the less is the possibility of his Tantric transformation. The less civilized, the more primitive, the more alive a person is. The more you become civilized, the more you become plastic - you become artificial, you become too much cultivated, you lose your roots into the earth. You are afraid of the muddy world. You start living away from the world; you start posing yourself as though you are not of the world. Tantra says: To find the real person you will have to go to the roots.
So Tantra says: Those who are still uncivilized, uneducated, uncultured, they are more alive, they have more vitality. And that's the observation of the modern psychologist too. A negro is more vital than the American - that is the fear of the American. The American is very much afraid of the negro. The fear is that the American has become very much plastic, and the negro is still vital, still down-to-earth.
The conflict between the blacks and the whites in America is not really the conflict between black and white, it is the conflict between the plastic and the real. And the American, the whitem an, is very much afraid, basically because he is afraid that if the negro is allowed, he will lose his woman, the American will lose his woman. The negro is more vital, sexually more vital, more alive; his energy is still wild. And that is one of the greatest fears of civilized people: to lose their women. They know that if more vital persons are available, they will not be able to hold their women.
Tantra says: In the world of those who arestill primitive, there is a possibility of starting to grow. You have grown in a wrong direction; they have not grown yet - they can still choose a right direction, they are more potential. And they don't have anything to undo; they can proceed directly.
An arrowsmith woman is a low-caste woman, and for Saraha - a learned Brahmin, a famous Brahmin, who had belonged to the court of the king - going to an arrowsmith woman is symbolic. The learned has to go to the vital. The plastic has to go to the real.
He saw this woman, young woman, very alive, radiant with life, cutting an arrow-shaft, looking neither to the right nor to the left, but wholly absorbed in making the arrow. He immediately felt something extraordinary in her presence, something that he had never come across. Even Sri Kirti, his Master, paled before the presence of this woman. Something so fresh and something from the very source
Sri Kirti was a great philosopher. Yes, he had told Saraha to drop all learning, but still he was a learned man. He had told Saraha to drop ALL Vedas and scriptures, but he had his own scriptures and his own Vedas. Even though he was anti-philosophical, his anti-philosophy was a sort of philosophy. Now, here is a woman who is neither philosophical nor anti-philosophical - who simply does not know what philosophy is, who is simply blissfully unaware of the world of philosophy, of the world of thought. She is a woman of action, and she is utterly absorbed in her action.
Saraha watched carefully: The arrow ready, the woman closing one eye and opening the other, assumed the posture of aiming at an invisible target. Saraha came still closer. Now, there was no target; she was simply posing. She had closed one eye, her other eye was open, and she was aiming at some unknown target - invisible, it was not there. Saraha started feeling some message. This posture was symbolic, he felt, but still it was very dim and dark. He could feel something there, but he could not figure it out, what it was.
Soheaskedthewomanwhethershewasaprofessionalarrowsmith, and the woman laughed loudly, a wild laugh, and said, ”You stupid Brahmin! You have left the Vedas, but now you are worshipping Buddha's sayings, Dhammapada. So what is the point? You have changed your books, you have changed your philosophy, but you remain all the time the same stupid man.”
Saraha was shocked. Nobody had talked to him that way; only an uncultured woman can talk that way. And the way she laughed was so uncivilized, so primitive -but still, something was very much alive. And he was feeling pulled. She was a great magnet and he was nothing but a piece of iron.
And then she said, ”You think you are a Buddhist?” He must have been in the robe of the Buddhist monk, the yellow robe. And she laughed again. And she said, ”Buddha's meaning can only be known through actions, not through words and not through books. Is not enough enough for you? Are you not yet fed up with all this? Do not waste any more time in that futile search. Come and follow me!”
And something happened, something like a communion. He had never felt like that before. In that moment, the spiritual significance of what she was doing dawned upon Saraha. Neither looking to the left, nor looking to the right, he had seen her - just looking in the middle.
For the first time he understood what Buddha means by being in the middle: avoid the axis. First he was a philosopher, now he has become anti-philosopher - from one extreme to another. First he was worshipping one thing, now he is worshipping just the opposite - but the worship continues. You can move from the left to the right, from the right to theleft, but that is not going to help. Youw ill be like a pendulum moving from the lef tto the right, from the right to the left.
And have you observed? - when the pendulum is going to the right, it is gaining momentum to go to the left; when it is going to the left it is again gaining momentum to go to the right. And the clock continues, and the world continues. Tobe in the middle means the pendulum just hangs there in the middle, neither to the right nor to the left. Then the clock stops, then the world stops. Then there is no more time... then the state of no-time.
HehadhearditsaidsomanytimesbySriKirti;hehadreadaboutit, he hadp ondered, contemplated over it;he had argued with others about it, thattobe in the middle is the right thing. For the first time he had seen it in an action: the woman was not looking to the right and not looking to the left... she was just looking in the middle, focussed in the middle.
The middle is the point from where the transcendence happens. Think about it, contemplate about it, watch it in life. A man is running after money, is mad, money-mad; money is the only god
One woman was asking another, ”Why have you left your boyfriend? What happened? I had been thinking that you were engaged and that you were going to be married - what happened?”
The woman said, ”Our religions are different, and that's why we have broken up.”
ThequestionerwaspuzzledbecausesheknewthatbothwereCatholics,soshesaid,”What doy ou mean by saying that your religions are different?”
The woman said, ”I worship money, and he is broke.”
There are people whose only god is money. One day or other, the god fails - it is bound to fail. Money cannot be the god. It was your illusion, you were projecting. One day or other you come to the point where you can see that there is no god in it, that there is nothing in it, that you have been wasting your life. Then you turn against it, then you take an opposite attitude: you become against money.Then you leave the money,you don't touch the money.Youarecontinuouslyobsessednow; now you are AGAINST the money but the obsession remains. You have moved from the left to the right, but your center of consciousness is still the money.
You can change from one desire to another. You were much too worldly, one day you can become other-worldly - you remain the same, the disease persists. Buddha says: To be worldly is to be worldly, and to be other-worldly is also to be worldly; to be for money is to be mad after money, to be against money is to be mad after money; to seek power is foolish, to escape is also foolish. Just to be in the middle is what wisdom is all about.
FOR THE FIRST TIME Saraha saw it actually there - he had not even seen it in Sri Kirti. It was really there. And the woman was true, she said, ”You can only learn through action.” And she was so utterly absorbed that she was not even looking at Saraha who was standing there watching her. She was so utterly absorbed, she was so totally in the action - that is again a Buddhist message: To be total in action is to be free of action.
Karma is created because you are not totally in it. If you are totally in it, it leaves no trace. Do anything totally and it is finished, and you will not carry a psychological memory of it. Do anything incompletely and it hangs with you, it goes on - it is a hangover. And the mind wants to continue and do it and complete it.
Mind has a great temptation to complete things. Complete anything and the mind is gone. If you continue doing things totally, one day you suddenly find there is no mind. Mind is the accumulated past of all incomplete actions.
You wanted to love a woman and you didn't love; now the woman is dead. You wanted to go to your father and you wanted to be forgiven for all that you had been doing, for all that you had been doing in such a way that he was feeling hurt - now he is dead. Now the hangover will remain. Now the ghost.... Now you are helpless - what to do? Whom to go to? And how to ask forgiveness? You wanted to be kind to a friend but you could not be because you became closed. Now the friend is no more, and it hurts. You start feeling a guilt, you repent. Things go on like this.
Do any action totally and you are free of it, and you don't look back. And the real man never looks back - because there is nothing to see. He has no hangovers. He simply goes ahead. His eyes are clear of the past, his vision is not clouded. In THAT clarity one comes to know what reality is.
You are so much worried with all your incomplete actions - you are like a junkyard. One thing is incomplete here, another thing is incomplete there - nothing is complete. Have you watched it? Have you ever completed anything? or is everything just incomplete? And you go on pushing aside onethingandyoustartanotherthing,andbeforeitiscompleteyoustartanother.Youbecomemore and more burdened - this is what karma is, Karma means incomplete action.
Be total... and you will be free.
The woman was totally absorbed. That's why she was looking so luminous, she was looking so beautiful. She was an ordinary woman, but the beauty was not of this earth. The beauty came because of total absorption. The beauty came because she was not an extremist. The beauty came because she was in the middle, balanced. Out of balance is grace.
For the first time Saraha encountered a woman who was not just physically beautiful, who was spiritually beautiful. Naturally, he was surrendered. The surrender happened. Absorbed totally, absorbed in whatsoever she was doing, he understood for the first time: this is what meditation is. Not that you sit for a special period and repeat a mantra, not that you go to the church or to the temple or to the mosque,buttobeinlife-togoondoingtrivialthings,butwithsuchabsorptionthat the profundity is revealed in every action.
He understood what meditation is for the first time. He had been meditating, he had been struggling hard, but for the first time meditation was there, alive. He could feel it. He could have touched it. It was almost tangible. Andthenherememberedthatclosingoneeye,openingtheother,isasymbol, a Buddhist symbol.
Buddha says... psychologists will agree with him now; after two thousand five hundred years psychology has come to that point where Buddha was so long before. Buddha says half the mind reasons and half the mind intuits. The mind is divided in two parts, in two hemispheres. The left¬side hemisphere is the faculty of reason, logic, discursive thought, analysis, philosophy, theology... words and words and words and arguments and syllogisms and inferences. The left-side mind is Aristotelian.
The right-side mind is intuitive, poetic - inspiration, vision, a priori consciousness, a priori awareness. Not that you argue - you simply come to know. Not that you infer - you simply realize. That is the meaning of'a priori awareness': it is simply there.
The truth is known by the right-side mind; truth is inferred by the left-side mind. Inference is just inference, it is not experience.
Suddenly he realized that the woman had closed one eye: she had closed one eye as symbolic of closing the eye of reason, logic. And she had opened the other eye symbolic of love, intuition, awareness. And then he remembered the posture.
Aiming at the unknown invisible, we are on the journey to know the unknown - to know that which cannot be known. That is real knowledge: toknowthatwhich cannot be known, to realize that which is unrealizable, to attain that which cannot be attained. This impossible passion is what makes a man a religious seeker.
Yes, it is impossible. By'impossible' I don't mean that it will not happen; by'impossible' I mean that it cannot happen unless you are utterly transformed. As you are it cannot happen, but there are different ways of being. And you can be totally a new man... then it happens. It is possible for a different kind of man. That's why Jesus says: Until you are reborn, you will not know it. A new man will know it.
You come to me. YOU will not know it. I will have to kill you, I will have to be drastically dangerous to you... you will have to disappear. And the new man is born, a new consciousness comes in - because there is something indestructible in you, which cannot be destroyed; nobody can destroy it. Only the destructible will be destroyed and the indestructible will be there. When you attain to that indestructible element in your being, to that eternal awareness in your being, you are a new man, a new consciousness.
Through that the impossible is possible, the unattainable is attained.
So he remembered the posture. Aiming at the unknown, the invisible, the unknowable, the one - that is the aim. How to be one with existence? The nondual is the aim, where subject and object are lost, where I and thou are lost.
There is a very famous book, and a great book, of Martin Buber, I AND THOU. Martin Buber says the experience of prayer is an I-thou experience - he is right. The experience of prayer is an l-thou experience: God is the'thou', you remain an'I', and you have a dialogue, a communion with the thou. But Buddhism has no prayer in it, and Buddhism goes higher. Buddhism says: Even if there is an I-thou relationship, you remain divided, you remain separate. You can shout at each other, but there will be no communion. The communion happens only when the I-thou division is no more; when subject and object disappear; where there is no I and no thou, no seeker and no sought... when there is unity, unison.
Realizing this, seeing into this woman's actions, and recognizing the truth, the woman called him' Saraha'. His name was Rahul; the woman called him Saraha.'Saraha' is a beautiful word. It means'he who has shot the arrow';'sara' means'arrow','ha(n)' means'have shot'.'Saraha' means'o ne who has shot the arrow'. The moment he recognized the significance of the woman's actions, those symbolic gestures, the moment he could read and decode what the woman was trying to give, what the woman was trying to show, the woman was tremendously happy. She danced and called him' Saraha', and said, ”Now, from today, you will be called Saraha: you have shot the arrow. Understanding the significance of my actions, you have penetrated.”
Saraha said to her, ”You are not an ordinary arrowsmith woman I am sorry to have even thought that you were an ordinary arrowsmith woman. Excuse me, I am tremendously sorry. You are a great Master and I am reborn through you. Till yesterday I was not a real Brahmin; from today I am. You are my Master and you are my mother and youh ave given me a new birth. I am no more the same. So, right you are -you have dropped my oldname and you have given me a new name.”
You ask me sometimes, ”Why do you give new names?”-to drop the old identity, to forget the past, not to be any more in any attachment with the past. A clean break is needed. You have to become discontinuous with the past.
Rahul became Saraha.
THE LEGEND HAS IT that the woman was nobody but a hidden Buddha. The name of the Buddha given in the scriptures is Sukhnatha - the Buddha who had come to help the great potential man, Saraha. Buddha, a certain Buddha of the name Sukhnatha, took the form of a woman. But why? why the form of a woman? Because Tantra believes that just as a man has to be born out of a woman, so the new birth of a disciple is also going to be out of a woman. In fact, all the Masters are more mothers than fathers. They have the quality of the feminine. Buddha is feminine, so is Mahavir, so is Krishna. You can see the feminine grace, the feminine roundness; you can see the feminine beauty;youcan lookinto theireyes andyouwill notfindthe male aggressiveness.
So it is very symbolic that a Buddha took the form of a woman. Buddhas always take the form of a woman. Theymaybelivingin amalebody, buttheyare feminine-becauseALLthatisborn isborn out of the feminine energy. Male energy can trigger it but cannot give birth.
A Master has to keep you in his womb for months, for years, sometimes for lives. One never knows when you will be ready to be born. A Master has to be a mother. A Master has to be tremendously capable of feminine energy, so that he can shower love on you - only then can he destroy. Unless you are certain about his love, you will not allow him to destroy you. How will you trust? Only his love will make you able to trust. And through trust, by and by, he will cut limb by limb. And one day suddenly youwill disappear. Slowly, slowly, slowly..and youare gone. GATE, GATE, PARA GATE - going, going, going, gone. Then the new is born.
The arrowsmith woman acceptedhim. In fact, she was waiting. AMaster waits for the disciple. Old traditions say: Before a disciple chooses the Master, the Master has chosen the disciple. Exactly that's what happened in this story. Sukhnatha was hiding in the form of a woman waiting for Saraha to come and be transformed through him.
And it seems more logical too, that a Master should choose first - because he is more aware, he knows. He can penetrate to the very possibility of your being, the very potentiality. He can see your future. Hecanseethatwhich can happen. WhenyouchooseaMaster, youthinkyouhavechosen - you are wrong. How can you choose a Master? You are so blind, how can you recognize a Master? You are so unaware, how can you feel a Master? If you start feeling him, that means he has already entered in your heart and has started playing with your energies - that's why you start feeling him.
Before a disciple ever chooses a Master, the Master has chosen him already.
She accepted. ShewaswaitingforSarahato come. They moved to acremation ground and started living together. Why to a cremation ground? Because Buddha says: Unless you understand death you will not be able to understand life. Unless you DIE, you will not be reborn.
Many Tantra disciples have lived in the cremation ground since Saraha. He was the founder; he lived in a cremation ground. People would be brought, dead bodies would be brought and burnt, andhelivedthere-thatwashishome. And he lived with this arrowsmith woman; they lived together. There was great love between them - not the love of a woman and a man, but the love of a Master and a disciple, which is certainly higher than any man-woman love can ever reach, which is more intimate, certainly more intimate... because a man-woman love affair is just of the bodies. At the most, sometimes it reaches to the mind; otherwise it remains in the body.
A disciple and a Master - it is a soul love affair. Saraha had found his soulmate. They were in tremendous love, great love, which rarely happens on the earth.
She taught him Tantra. Only a woman can teach Tantra. Somebody asked me why I have chosen Kaveesha to be the group leader for Tantra - only a woman can be a Tantra group leader. It will be difficult for a man. Yes, sometimes a man can also be, but then he will have to become very very feminine. A woman is already; she has already those qualities, those loving, affectionate qualities; she naturally has that care, that love, that feeling for the soft.
Saraha became a tantrika under the guidance of this arrowsmith woman. Now he was no longer meditating. One day he had left all the Vedas, scriptures, knowledge; now he left even meditation. Now rumors started spreading all over the country: He no longer meditates. He sings, of course, and dances too, but no meditation any more. Now singing was his meditation. Now dancing was his meditation. Now celebration was his whole lifestyle.
Living in a cremation ground and celebrating! Living where only death happens and living joyously! This is the beauty of Tantra - it joins together the opposites, the contraries, the contradictories. If you go to the cremation ground you will feel sad; it will be difficult for you to be joyous; it will be very difficult for you to sing and dance where people are being burnt, and where people are crying and weeping. And every day death and death... day and night death. How will you rejoice?
But if you cannot rejoice there, then all that you think is your joy is just a make-believe. If you can rejoice there, then joy has really happened to you. Now it is unconditional. Now it doesn't make any difference whether death happens or life, whether somebody is born or somebody is dying.
Saraha started singing and dancing. He was no longer serious - Tantra is not. Tantra is a playfulness. Yes, it is sincere, but not serious. It is very joyous. Play entered his being - Tantra is play, because Tantra is a highly evolved form of love: Love is play.
There are people who would not like even love to be a play. Mahatma Gandhi says: Make love only when you want to reproduce. Even love they change into work - reproduction. This is just ugly! Make love to your woman only when you want to reproduce - is she a factory!?'Reproduction'? - the very word is ugly. Love is fun! Make love to your woman when you are feeling happy, joyous, when you are at the top of the world. Share that energy. Love your man when you have that quality ofdance and song and joy-notforreproduction! The word'reproduction'isobscene! Make loveout of joy, out of abundant joy. Give when you have it!
Play entered into his being. A lover has always the spirit of play. The moment the spirit of play dies, you become a husband or a wife, then you are no longer lovers; then you reproduce. And the moment you become a husband or a wife, something beautiful has gone dead. It is no more alive, the juice flows no more. Now it is just pretension, hypocrisy.
Play entered his being, and through play true religion was born. His ecstasy was so infectious that people started coming to watch him dancing and singing. And when people would come and watch, they would start dancing, they would start singing with him. The cremation ground became a great celebration. Yes, bodies were being burnt still, but more and more crowds started gathering around Saraha and the arrowsmith woman, and great joy was created on that cremation ground.
And it became so infectious that people who had never heard anything about ecstasy would come, danceandsing,andfallintoecstasy,gointoSamadhi. Hisveryvibration,hisverypresence,became so potent that just if you were ready to participate with him, it would happen... contact high. Those who came around him he was so drunk that his inner drunkenness started overflowing to other people. He was so stoned that others started becoming stoned and more stoned.
But then the inevitable: the Brahmins and the priests and the scholars and the so-called righteous people started vilifying and slandering him - that I call the inevitable. Whenever there is a man like Saraha, the scholars are going to be against him, the priests are going to be against him, and the so-called moral people,puritans,self-righteouspeople. They started spreading absolutelyunbiased rumors about him.
They started saying to people: ”He has fallen from grace. He is a pervert. He is no more a Brahmin. He has given up celibacy. He is no more even a Buddhist monk. He indulges in shameful practices with a low-caste woman and runs around like a mad dog in all directions.” His ecstasy was just like a mad dog to them - it depends how you interpret. He was dancing all over the cremation ground. He WAS mad, but he was not a mad dog - he was a mad god!
It depends on how you look.
The king also was told these things. He was anxious to know exactly what was happening. He became worried; more and more people started coming to him. They knew him; they knew that the king was always deeply respectful towards Saraha, that he wanted to appoint him as his counsellor in the court, but Saraha had renounced the world. The king had much respect for his learning, so they started coming to the king.
The king was worried. He had loved the young man and respected him too, and he was concerned. So he sent a few people to persuade Saraha and tell him: ”Come back to your old ways. You are a Brahmin, your father was a great scholar, you yourself were a great scholar - what are you doing? You have gone astray. Come back home. I am still here! You come to the palace, be part of my family. This is not good.”
The people went and Saraha sang one hundred and sixty verses to those people who had come to convert him. Those one hundred and sixty verses... and those people started dancing and they never came back!
The king was even more worried. The king's wife, the queen, was also always interested in the young man. She wanted the young man to marry her daughter, so she went there. And Saraha sang eighty verses to the queen... and she never came back.
Now the king was much puzzled: ”What is happening there?” So the king himself went there, and Saraha sang forty verses and the king was converted, and he started dancing in the cremation ground like a mad dog.
So there are three scriptures available in the name of Saraha: first, The People's Song of Saraha - one hundred and eighty verses; second, The Queen's Song of Saraha first, one hundred and sixty verses, second eighty verses; and The Royal Song of Saraha which we are going to meditate upon forty verses. One hundred and sixty verses for the people because their understanding was not great; eighty for the queen - she was a little higher, her understanding was a little higher; forty for the king because he was really aman of intelligence, of awareness, of understanding.
Because the king was converted, the whole country, by and by, was converted. And it is said in the old scriptures that a time came when the whole country became empty. Empty?! - it is a Buddhist word. It means people became nobodies, they lost their ego-trips. People started enjoying the moment. The hustle and bustle, the competitive violence, disappeared from the country. It became a silent country. It became empty... as if nobody was there. The men as such disappeared from the country; a great divineness descended on the country. These forty verses were at the root of it, the very source of it.
NOW WE ENTER into this great pilgrimage: The Royal Song of Saraha. It is also called'The Song on Human Action' - very paradoxical, because it has nothing to do with action. That's why it is also called'The Song on Human Action'. It has something to do with the being, but when the being is transformed,actionistransformed.WhenYOUaretransformed,yourbehavioristransformed-not vice versa. Not that first you change your action and then your being changes - no. Tantra says: First change your being and then your action changes automatically, of its own accord. First attain to a different kind of consciousness, and that will be followed by a different kind of action, character, behavior.
Tantra believes in being, not in action and character. That's why it is also called'The Song on Human Action' - because once being is transformed, your actions are transformed. That is the only way to change your actions. Who has ever been able to change his actions directly? You can only pretend.
If you have anger in you and you want to change your action, what will you do? You will suppress the anger and you will show a false face; you will have to wear a mask. If you have sexuality in you, what will you do to change it? You can take the vow of celibacy - of brahmacharya - and you can pretend, but deep down the volcano continues. You are sitting on a volcano which can erupt any moment. You will be constantly trembling, constantly afraid, in fear.
Have you not watched the so-called religious people? They are always afraid - afraid of hell - and always trying somehow to get into heaven. But they don't know what heaven is; they have not tasted it at all. If you change your consciousness, heaven comes in you, not that you go to heaven. Nobody has ever gone to heaven, and nobody has ever gone to hell. Let it be decided once and for all: heaven comes to you, hell comes to you - it depends on you. Whatsoever you call, it comes.
If your BEING changes, you suddenly become available to heaven - heaven descends on you. If your being does not change. you are in a conflict; you are forcing something which is not there. You become false and false and more false, and you become two persons, you become schizophrenic,
split You show something, you are something else. You say something - you never do it, you
do something else. And then you are continuously playing hide-and-seek with yourself. Anxiety, anguish, are natural in such a state - that's what hell is.
Now the Song:
I BOW DOWN TO NOBLE MANJUSRI
I BOW DOWN TO HIM WHO HAS CONQUERED THE FINITE
Thisword'Manjusri'hastobeunderstood. ManjusriwasoneofthedisciplesofBuddha, buthewasa very rare disciple. Buddha had many rare disciples; in different ways they were rare. Mahakashyap was rare because he could understand the message not delivered in words... and so on and so forth. Manjusri was rare because he had the greatest quality of being a Master.
Whenever somebody was too much of a difficult problem, somebody was a problematic person, Buddha would send him to Manjusri. Just the name of Manjusri and people would start trembling. He was really a hard man, he was really drastic. Whenever somebody was sent to Manjusri, the disciples would say: ”That person has gone to Manjusri's sword.” It has become famous down the ages: the sword of Manjusri - because Manjusri used to cut the head in one stroke; he was not a slowgoer: He would simply cut the head in one stroke. His compassion was so great that he could be so cruel.
So, by and by, the name of Manjusri became a representative name - a name for all Masters, because they are all compassionate and they all have to be cruel. Compassionate because they will give birth to a new man in you; cruel because they will have to destroy and demolish the old.
So when Saraha bows down first before starting his Song, he says:I BOW DOWN TO NOBLE MANJUSRI - the Master of all Masters - I BOW DOWN TO HIM WHO HAS CONQUERED THE FINITE. And then he bows down to Buddha who has conquered the finite, and who has become the infinite.
AS CALM WATER LASHED BY WIND
TURNS INTO WAVES AND ROLLERS,
SO THE KING THINKS OF SARAHA
IN MANY WAYS, ALTHOUGH ONE MAN.
Visualize a lake, a placid, silent lake, with no waves. Then there comes a great wind and it starts playing on the surface of the lake, and the lake is disturbed, and a thousand and one ripples and waves arise. Just a moment before, the reflection of the full moon was there in the lake; now it is no more there. Now the moon is still reflected, but in a thousand and one fragments. It is all over the lake. The whole lake is silvery because of the reflection, but you cannot catch hold of the real reflection - where the moon is, how it looks. It is all distorted.
Saraha says this is the situation of the worldly mind, of the deluded. This is the only difference between a Buddha and a non-Buddha. A Buddha is one whose wind is no more blowing. That wind is called TRISHNA - desire. Have you watched, observed? Whenever there is desire, there are a thousand and one ripples in your heart, your consciousness is disturbed and distracted. Whenever desire stops, you are at ease, at peace with yourself.
So desire is the wind that distorts the mind. And when the mind is distorted, you cannot reflect the reality.
AS CALM WATER LASHED BY WIND
TURNS INTO WAVES AND ROLLERS,
SO THE KING THINKS OF SARAHA
IN MANY WAYS, ALTHOUGH ONEMAN.
Saraha says two things. First he says: Your mind is too much disturbed by the rumors, so much wind has blown over the surface of your mind. You will not be able to see me, THOUGH I AM ONE
- but your mind is reflecting me in a thousand fragments.
This was true. He could see through and through the king. The king was puzzled. On one hand he respectedtheyoungman,ononehandhehadalwaystrustedtheyoungmanheknewthathecould not be wrong. But so many people, so many so-called honest, respectable people, rich, learned, came to him and they all reported: ”He has gone wrong, he has become almost mad - -he is a maniac, he is a pervert, he lives with an arrowsmith woman of low caste. He lives in the cremation ground - this is not a place to live! He has forgotten all old rituals; he no more reads the Vedas, he no more chants the name of the God. He is not even heard to meditate. And he is indulging in strange, ugly, shameful practices.”
Tantra looks shameful to people who are very much sexually repressed. They cannot understand - because of their repressions they cannot understand what is happening. So all these things are like a great wind in the mind of the king. One part of him loves and respects; one part of him is in deep doubt.
Saraha looked directly and he said: SO THE KING THINKS OF SARAHA IN MANY WAYS, ALTHOUGH ONE MAN. Although Saraha is one man: I am just like the full moon, but the lake is in turmoil. So please, if you want to understand me, there is no way to understand me directly
- the only way to understand me is to stop this wind which is blowing on the surface of your mind. Let your consciousness be at ease... then see! Let all these waves and the rollers stop, let your consciousness be a placid pool, and then you see. I cannot convince you of what is happening unless you are able to see it. It is happening, it is here. I am here standing before you. I am one man,butIcanseeinyou-youarelookingatmeasifIamathousandmen.
TO A FOOL WHO SQUINTS
ONE LAMP IS AS TWO;
WHERE SEEN AND SEER ARE NOT TWO, AH! THE MIND
WORKS ON THE THINGNESS OF THEM BOTH.
And then he takes similes, metaphors. First he says'like a lake you are in turmoil'. Then he says: TO A FOOL WHO SQUINTS ONE LAMP IS AS TWO - he cannotsee one, he sees two.
I have heard:
Mulla Nasrudin was teaching his son the ways of being a drunkard. After a few drinks, Mulla said, ”Now, let us go. Always remember, this is the rule to stop: when you start seeing that one person is looking like two, then go home - it is enough.”
One person looking like two, but the son said, ”Where? Where is that one person?”
He said, ”Look there on that table two persons are sitting.”
And the son said, ”There is nobody!” He had already drunk too much.
Remember, when you are unconscious, things don't look as they are; when you are unconscious, you project. Tonight looking at the moon you can press your eye with your finger, and you can see two moons. And when you are seeing two moons, it is very difficult to believe that there is one -you are seeing two. Just think. Somebody is born with a natural defect: his eye has that pressure which makes one thing look like two - he will always see two things. Wherever you see one, he will see two.
Our inner vision is clouded with many things, so we go on seeing things which are not. And when we see, how can we believe that they are not? We have to trust our own eyes, and our own eyes may be distorting.
TO A FOOL WHO SQUINTS
ONE LAMPISAS TWO;
WHERE SEEN AND SEER ARE NOT TWO...
Saraha says to the king: If you are thinking I and you are two, then you are unconscious, then you are a fool, then you are drunk, then you don't know how to see. If you see really, then I and you are one, then the seer and the seen are not two. Then you will not see Saraha dancing here - you will see yourself dancing here. Then when I go into ecstasy, YOU will go into ecstasy and that will be the only way to know what has happened to Saraha, there is no other way. What has happened to me? If you want to know, the only way is to become a participant in my being. Don't be a watcher. Don't stand aside and just become a spectator. You will have to participate in my experience; you will have to lose yourself a little bit into me. You will have to overlap my boundaries.
That's what sannyas is all about. You start coming closer, you start losing your boundaries into me. Only then, one day, through participation, when you fallen rapportwith me, something willbe seen, something will be understood. And you will not be able to convince anybody else who has been just a spectator - because your visions will be different. You have participated, and he has only been observing - you are living in two different worlds.
THOUGH THE HOUSE-LAMPS HAVE BEEN LIT...
Listen to this beautiful saying of Saraha:
THOUGH THE HOUSE-LAMPS HAVE BEEN LIT,
THEBLINDLIVEON IN THE DARK.
THOUGH SPONTANEITY IS ALL-ENCOMPASSING AND CLOSE,
TO THE DELUDED IT REMAINS ALWAYS FAR AWAY.
HE SAYS: Look! I have become Enlightened. THOUGH THE HOUSE-LAMPS HAVE BEEN LIT... my innermost core is no more dark. See! There is great light in me. My soul is awakened. I am no more the same Rahul you used to know - I am Saraha: my arrow has reached the target.
THOUGH THE HOUSE-LAMPS HAVE BEEN LIT,
THEBLINDLIVEON IN THE DARK.
But what can I do? Saraha says. If somebody is blind, even when the house-lamps are lit he goes on living in darkness. Not that the lamps are missing, but his eyes are closed. So don't listen to blind people! Just open your eyes and look at me, see me - who is standing in front of you, whom you are confronting.
THEBLINDLIVEON IN THE DARK,
THOUGH THE HOUSE-LAMPS HAVE BEEN LIT.
THOUGH SPONTANEITY IS ALL-ENCOMPASSING AND CLOSE...
And I am so close to you... the spontaneity is so close to you, you can already touch it and eat it and drink it. Youcan DANCEwith me andyoucan move into ecstasywith me. Iam SOclose -you may not find spontaneity so close again!
TO THE DELUDED IT REMAINS ALWAYS FAR AWAY.
They talk about Samadhi, and they read the Patanjali's Sutras, they talk about great things, but whenever that great thing happens they are against it.
This is something very strange about man. Man is a very strange animal. You can appreciate Buddha, but if Buddha comes and just confronts you, you will not be able to appreciate him at all - youmay go againsthim, youmay become the enemy. Why? When you read a book about Buddha, everything is okay, the book is in your hand. When an alive Buddha has to be confronted, he is NOT in your hand you are falling into his hand. Hence the fear, resistance. One wants to escape.
And the best way to escape is to convince yourself that he has gone wrong, something is wrong with him. That is the only way - if you prove to yourself that he is wrong. And you can find a thousand and one things in a Buddha which can look wrong, because you are squinting and you are blind and your mind is in a turmoil. You can project anything.
Now, this man has attained to Buddhahood, and they are talking about the low-caste woman. They have not looked into that woman's reality. They have only been thinking that she is an arrowsmith woman, so low-caste, SUDRA, untouchable. How can a Brahmin touch an untouchable woman? How can the Brahmin live there?
And they have heard that the woman cooks food for him. This is a great sin; this is a great fall - a Brahmineatingfood cooked byasudra,byanuntouchable,byalow-castewoman? And whyshould a Brahmin live on the cremation ground? Brahmins have never lived there. They live in the temples, they live in the palaces. Why on the cremation ground? - dirty place, skulls and dead bodies all around. This is perversion!
But they have not looked into the fact that unless you understand death you will never be able to understand life. When you have looked deep into death and found that life is never dead, when you have looked, penetrated deep into death and found that life continues even after death, that death makes no difference, that death is immaterial... you don't know anything about life - life is eternal, timeless. So only the body dies. So only the DEAD dies. The alive continues. But for this, one has to go into deep experimentation. They will not look at that.
Now they have heard that he is going into strange practices. And they must have gossipped and exaggerated; things must have gone out of their hands. Everybody goes on multiplying the gossip. And there are Tantra practices which can be gossipped about.
In Tantra the man sits in front of the woman, the naked woman, and he has to watch her so deeply to see her through and through, that all desire to see a woman naked disappears. Then man is free from the form. Now this is a great secret technique; otherwise you go on continuously seeing her in your mind. Each woman that passes by on the road, you want to undress her - that is there.
Now suddenly you see Saraha sitting before a naked woman. How will you interpret? You will interpret according to yourself. You will say, ”So okay, what we always wanted to do he is doing, so we are better than him. At least we are not doing it. Of course, we visualize sometimes, but it is only in thought, not in deed. He has fallen.” And you will not miss the opportunity.
But what is he really doing? It is a secret science. By watching, for months together... the tantrika will watch the woman, meditate on her body form, meditate on her beauty, will look at everything, whatsoever he wants to look at. Breasts have some appeal? - he will look and meditate on the breasts. He has to get rid of the form, and the only way to get rid of the form is to know it so deeply that it has no attraction any more.
Now. something just the opposite is happening from what the gossippers are saying. He is going beyond. Never again will he want to undress a woman not even in the mind, not even in the dream.
That obsession will not be there. But the crowd, the mob, has its own ideas. Ignorant, unaware, they go on talking about things.
THOUGH SPONTANEITY IS ALL-ENCOMPASSING AND CLOSE,
TO THE DELUDED IT REMAINS ALWAYS FAR AWAY.
THOUGH THERE MAY BE MANY RIVERS, THEY ARE ONE IN THE SEA,
THOUGH THERE MAY BE MANY LIES, ONE TRUTH WILL CONQUER ALL.
WHEN ONE SUN APPEARS, THE DARK,
HOWEVER DEEP, WILL VANISH.
And Saraha says: Just look at me - the sun has risen. So I know, howsoever deep your dark, it is going to vanish. LOOK at me... thetruth isborn in me! S you may have thousandsoflies aboutme, but one truth will conquer them all.
THOUGH THERE MAY BE MANY RIVERS, THEY ARE ONE IN THE SEA.
Just come close to me. Letyourriverdropinto my ocean, and you will have my taste.
THOUGH THERE MAY BE MANY LIES, ONE TRUTH WILL CONQUER ALL.
Truth is one. Only lies are many, only lies can be many - truth cannot be many. Health is one: diseases are many. And one health conquers all diseases. And one truth conquers all lies.
WHEN ONE SUN APPEARS, THE DARK,
HOWEVER DEEP, WILL VANISH.
In these four verses, Saraha has invited the king to enter into his inner being, he has opened his heart. And he says: I am not here to convince you logically. I am here to convince you existentially! Iwill notgive anyproof, and Iwill not say anything in defence of myself. The heart is just open -you come in, you go in. You see what has happened... so close is spontaneity, so close is God, so close is truth. The sun has risen. Open your eyes!
Remember, a mystic has no proof. He cannot have any proof by the very nature of things. HE IS the only proof - so he can bare his heart to you.
These verses, these Songs of Saraha, have to be meditated on deeply. Each song can become the opening of a flower in your heart. I hope these forty verses will become forty flowers in your being, as they became in the being of the king. The king was liberated - so can you be. Saraha has penetrated the target. You can also penetrate the target. You can also become a Saraha - one whose arrow is shot.
CHAPTER 2
The goose is out!
22 April 1977 am in Buddha Hall
The first question:
Question 1
IS THERE ANY DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE APPROACHES OF SHIVA AND SARAHA TOWARDS TANTRA?
NOT REALLY, NOT ESSENTIALLY. But as far as the form is concerned, yes. Religions differ only in the form. Religions differ only in their methodology. Religions differ as far as the door into the Divine is concerned, but not existentially. And there are only two basic formal differences: thatofthe path of devotion, prayer, love, and the path of meditation, awareness. These two basic differences persist.
Shiva's approach is that of devotion; it is that of prayer, of love. Saraha's approach is that of meditation, awareness. The distinction is still formal, because when the lover and the meditator reach they arrive at the same goal. Their arrows are released from different angles, but they reach the same target. Their arrows are released from different bows, but they reach the same target. The bow does not matter finally. What type of bow you have chosen does not matter if the target is attained.
And these are the two bows because man basically is divided into two: thinking and feeling. Either you can approach reality through thinking or you can approach reality through feeling.
The Buddhist approach - the approach of Buddha and Saraha is through intelligence. It is basically through the mind that Saraha moves. Of course, the mind has to be left behind, but it is the MIND that has to be left behind. By and by, the mind has to disappear into meditation but it is the MIND that has to disappear, it is the THINKING that has to be transformed. And a state of no-thought has to be created. But remember: it is a state of no-thought, and that can be created only by slowly dropping thoughts, by and by. So the whole work consists in the thinking part.
Shiva's approach is that of the feeling, of the heart. The feeling has to be transformed. Love has to be transformed so that it becomes prayer. On Shiva's way, the devotee and the deity remain, the BHAKTA and BHAGWAN remain. At the ultimate peak they both disappear into each other. Listen to it carefully: when Shiva's Tantra reaches to its ultimate orgasm. I is dissolved into thou, and thou is dissolved into I - they are both together, they become one unity.
When Saraha's Tantra reaches to its ultimate peak, the recognition is: neither you are right, neither you aretrue, neitheryou exist, norI-both disappear. There are two zeros meeting -notIand thou, neither I nor thou. Two zeros, two empty spaces dissolve into each other; because the whole effort on Saraha's path is how to dissolve thought, and I and thou are parts of thought.
When thought is utterly dissolved, how can you call yourself l? And whom will you call your God? God is part of thought, it is a thought-creation, a thought-construct, a mind-construct. So all mind¬constructs dissolve and SHOONYA, emptiness, arises.
On Shiva'spath you nomorelovetheform, you nomorelovetheperson -you startlovingthewhole existence. The whole existence becomes your thou; you are addressed to the whole existence. Possessiveness is dropped, jealousy is dropped, hatred is dropped - all that is negative in feeling is dropped. And the feeling becomes purer and purer. A moment comes when there is pure love. In that moment of pure love, you dissolve into thou and thou dissolves into you. You ALSO disappear. but you disappear not like two zeros, you disappear as the beloved disappears into the lover and the lover disappears into the beloved.
Up to this point they are different, but that too is a formal difference. Beyond this, what does it matter whether you disappear like a lover and a beloved or you disappear like two zeros? The basic point, the fundamental point, is that you disappear, that nothing is left, that no trace is left. That disappearance is Enlightenment.
So you have to understand it: if love appeals to you, Shiva will appeal to you, and THE BOOK OF THE SECRETS will be your Tantra Bible. If meditation appeals to you, then Saraha will appeal to you. It depends on you. BOTH are right, both are going on the same journey. With whom you would like to travel, that is your choice.
If you can be alone and blissful, then Saraha; if you cannot be blissful when you are alone, and your bliss comes only when you relate, then Shiva.
This is the difference between Hindu Tantra and Buddhist Tantra.
The second question:
Question 2
OSHO, WHATSOEVER YOU SAY, I ALWAYS AGREE WITH IT. THEN WHY IS MY LIFE NOT CHANGING?
MAYBE BECAUSE OF THE AGREEMENT. If you agree with me, or if you disagree with me, your life willnotchange. Itisnotaquestionofagreementordisagreement-itisaquestionofunderstanding. And understanding is beyond both agreement and disagreement.
Ordinarily,whenyouagreeyouthinkyouhaveunderstoodme. Ifyouhaveunderstoodmethenthere will be no question of agreement and disagreement. How can you agree with truth? or disagree? The sun has risen - do you agree or do you disagree? You will say the question is irrelevant.
Agreement, disagreement, is about theories, not about truth. So when you agree with me you are not really agreeing with me - you start feeling that I agree with your theory that you have already been carrying with yourself. Wheneveryou feel thatOsho isin agreementwith you,you feel thatyou agree with Osho. Whenever I am not in agreement with you, then there is trouble, then you don't agree with me. Or,youdon'tlistentothat,youdon'thearthat. YousimplycloseyourselfwhenIam saying something which does not agree with you.
It is not a question of agreement and disagreement. Drop this! I am not here in search of any converts; I am not trying any philosophy; I am not here proposing any theology; I am not seeking followers. I am seeking disciples - and that is a totally different thing, utterly different. A disciple is not one who agrees: a disciple is one who listens, who learns. The very word'disciple' comes from learning, discipline.
A disciple is one who is open to learn. A follower is closed. A follower thinks he has agreed; now there is nothing and no need to remain open - he can close, he can afford to close. A disciple can never afford to close; there is so much to learn. How can you agree or disagree? And a disciple has no ego, so who will agree and who will not agree. A disciple is just an opening there is nobody inside to agree or not agree. Your very agreement is creating the trouble.
Andnobodyisevertransformedthroughagreement. Agreementisverysuperficial,veryintellectual. To be transformed, one needs understanding. It is always understanding that transforms, that mutates. AND, when you understand, you are not to do anything - the understanding will start doing things. It is not that first you understand, then you practise - no. The VERY understanding, the very fact of understanding, goes deep into your heart, sinks, and there is transformation.
Transformation is a consequence of understanding.
If you agree then the problem arises: Now what to do? I have agreed, now something has to be practised. Agreement is very stupid, as stupid as disagreement.
And then mind is very cunning! You never know what you mean by agreement... A few scenes - first:
The boy's mother had died when he was an infant, and his father had worked hard to raise him properly. Finally, the boy went away to college. His first letter was a disappointment to his father. It was a disappointment but the old man did not know exactly why. Surely there was nothing to despair of in the content. Perhaps something in the tone bothered him. The letter read: ”Dear Dad,
Everything is fine. I like it here at college. I'm on the football team. I'm in the best fraternity on campus. I got an'A' on my first algebra exam...”
After some thinking, the father was able to put his finger on the difficulty. He wrote back:
”Look, son, I don't want to seem to be a silly old man, but there is something which would make me very happy. It isn't that I think you're ungrateful in any way. But I've had to work very hard to raise you and send you to college and I never had a chance to go to college myself. What I mean is this: it would mean a lot to me if you would say,'We did this and we did that,' instead of'I did this and I did that.'Itwouldhelpmetofeel-asifIhadapartinitall.”
The boy understood immediately and thereafter letters came in the form: ”Well, Dad, we won this big game last Saturday. We've got a date with a swell girl. We're going to get an'A' in history.” The old man took earnest pleasure in this sharing of experience. Days were sunny for him.
One day a telegram arrived: ”Dear Dad, We got the Dean's daughter in trouble. She had twins. Mine died. What are you going to do with yours?”
Mindisverycunning.Watch...whenyouagreewithme,doyoureallyagreewithme?ordoyoufind thatIamagreeabletoyou?Andthenmindisverylegal,mindisalawyer:itcanfindwaystoagree and yet remain the same. Not only that, but when you agree you start feeling as if now it is Osho's dutytotransformyou-whatmorecanyoudo'?-youareagreeing,youhavedoneyourpart.What morecanyoudo?-youhaveagreed.youhavebecomeasannyasin,youhavesurrendered.What more can you do'?
Now, if nothing is happening, you start getting angry at me. Then when I say something to you, it is not exactly the same thing that you hear. You hear in your own way. You hear with all Your interpretations. You hear through your past, through memories, through knowledge, through your conditionings. YOU HEAR THROUGH THE MIND! And the mind gives a color to everything that you hear. It immediately Jumps on it, changes it, makes it agreeable to you; drops a few things, exaggerates a few other things, fills the gaps. Only part of what I have said remains in it and the part can never transform, only the whole.
But the whole can remain whole only when you are not making any effort to agree or disagree. When you are not making any effort to agree or disagree, you can put the mind aside. If you are trying to make an effort to agree, how can you put the mind aside? It is MIND which agrees or disagrees.
Understanding is something bigger than mind. Understanding happens in your total being. It is as much in your head as it is in your toe. Understanding is something total. Mind is a very tiny part, but very dictatorial. And it goes on pretending that it is the whole.
Second scene:
Then there was the middle-aged businessman who took his wife to Paris. After traipsing with her from one shop to another, he begged for a day off to rest, and got it. With the wife gone shopping again, he went to a bar and picked up a luscious Parisienne. They got on well until the question of money came up. She wanted fifty American dollars; he offered ten.
They couldn't get together on the price, so they didn't get together.
That evening he escorted his wife to one of the nicer restaurants, and here he spotted his gorgeous babe of the afternoon seated at a table near the door.
”See, monsieur?”said the babe, as they passed her. ”Look what you gotfor yourlousy ten bucks.”
Your understanding is your understanding. Your interpretation is your interpretation. You will look from your angle.
Whatsoever you hear is your interpretation, always remember - beware of it! It is NOT what I have said: it is what you have thought that you have heard - and they are not the same things. You agree with your own echo; you don't agree with me. You agree with your own idea. Then how can you change? The idea is yours, the agreement is yours, so there is no possibility of change.
You please stop agreeing, disagreeing. You just listen to me. Your method of agreement may be a sort of trick to protect yourself, so that you don't get the shock. It functions like a buffer. I say something: you agree immediately. The shock is avoided. If you were not agreeing with me, it may haveshocked you to your very roots, itmayhaveshaken you toyourveryguts. I say something; you say, ”Yes, I agree.” With this agreement you cut. Now there is no need to be shocked - you agree. If you were not agreeing or disagreing... it is the same thing with disagreement. The moment I say something and there is somebody who says, ”Idon'tagree,”he has cutthe energy. Nowthe energy will not go into his roots and will not shake him.
We have created so many buffers around ourselves, protections. These protectionswillnotallowyou to change. To change you will need to be shocked - shocked tremendously, terribly. It is going to be painful - transformation is going to be painful. Agreement is very comfortable, so is disagreement. I don't make much difference between agreement and disagreement; they are two aspects of the same coin.
The REAL person who wants to be near me and close to me, who wants to be really in contact with me, will not agree, will not disagree. He will simply listen to me - pure listening, absolutely pure listening, with no interpretation. He will put himself aside. He will give me way.
The third scene:
The teacher had just finished giving her first-graders the basic facts of life. Little Mary raised her hand from a front-row seat. ”Can a six-year-old boy make a baby?”
”No,” said the teacher smiling, ”that would be impossible. Any other questions, class?”
Pause. Mary again put her hand up. ”Can a six-year-old girl make a baby?”
”No,” said the teacher. Whereupon the little boy behind Mary leaned forward and whispered loudly in her ear, ”Ya see! I told ya, ya didn't have nothin' to worry about!”
All your agreements, all your disagreements, are just finding ways to remain the way you are, not to change. People's whole lives are devoted to one work: how.not to change. They GO on saying, ”I don't want to be miserable,” and they go on doing things which make them miserable. They go on saying, ”I want to change,” but I look deep down in them and they don't want to change.
In fact, thisexpressdesirethattheywanttochangeisagain atricknottochange;sotheycan sayto the world, ”I am trying to change and I am saying loudly and shouting loudly I want to change, and still if nothing is happening what can I do?”
You cannot change - the last thing I would like to say about this question - YOU cannot change. You can only allow change to happen. Trying to change, you will never change. Who is trying? The old? Look at the inner logic of it: you are trying to change yourself. It is almost like pulling yourself up by your own shoe-strings. What can happen out of it? Nothing is possible. You cannot change yourself, because WHO is this one who is trying to change? It is your past. It is you.
You can allow a change to happen. What can you do to allow it? Please don't agree and disagree with me. Youjustlisten! Youjustbehere. Youjustletmypresencefunction asacatalyticagent. You just get infected by me. You just catch the disease that I am having, the measles that I am having. You just allow me. You don't try to change yourself.
This allowing is what surrender is all about.
A sannyasin is not one who has agreed with me. If he has agreed with me, then he is not a sannyasin, then he is a follower. Just as Christians are followers of Christ - they have agreed with Christ, butthathasnotchangedthem. Just as Buddhists are followers of Buddha - they have agreed with Buddha, but that has not changed them. Can't you see the whole world is following somebody or other?
Sotofollowisawaytoavoidchange. Pleasedon'tfollowme. Yousimplylisten towhatishappening here, you see what is happening here. You just look into me, and you give me way - so my energy can startfunctioning on your energy. It is not a mind thing: it is a total affair... so that you can start vibrating in the same wavelength - even for a few moments.
Those moments will bring change, those moments will bring glimpses of the unknown. Those moments will make you aware that there is eternity beyond time. Those moments will give you a feel of what it is to be in meditation. Those moments will allow you a little taste of God, of Tao, of Tantra, of Zen. Those moments will bring the possibility of change, because those moments will come, not from your past but from your future.
Agreeing it is your past which agrees with me. Opening, allowing, it is your future which opens - opens with me. Your possibility of transformation is in your future. The past is dead and gone and finished. Bury it! It has no meaning any more. Don't go on carrying it; it is unnecessary luggage. Because of THIS luggage, you cannot go very high.
Whatdoyoumean when yousay, ”Iagree with you”? Itmeans your past agreeing, your past feeling good and nodding, and saying, ”Yes, that's what I have always been thinking.” This is a way to avoid the future. Be aware
Just beingwith me - that's satsang, that's contact high. Just being with me... in spite ofyou, a few rays will enter in your being and will start playing. And then you will become aware that whatever life you have lived was not life at all, that you have been in an illusion, that you have been dreaming. Those few glimpses of reality will shatter your whole past. And then there is transformation.
It comes naturally of its own accord - it follows understanding.
The third question:
Question 3
SOMETIMES AS I WATCH PEOPLE PLAYING THE SAME OLD GAMES OVER AND OVER, MY EYES FEEL ANCIENT AND JADED AND MY HEART WEARY AND CYNICAL.
I GUESS IT'S BECAUSE I'M SEEING MORE AND MORE MY OWN GAMES AND TRICKS AND I HEAR YOUR MADDENING VOICE BETWEEN MY EARS SAYING,'THAT'S OKAY - JUST YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT AND LOVE YOURSELF; AND THERE IS NO PROBLEM.'
JUST???!
I THINK IF YOU SAY THIS WORD AGAIN I WILL SCREAM. WASN'T I HAPPIER WHEN I THOUGHT THERE WAS A GOAL?
THE QUESTION IS FROM MA DEVA ANANDO. It is significant. The question can be that of almost everybody who is present. Listen to it. It simply shows a situation that every seeker has to pass.
First, Anando says, ”Sometimes as I watch people playing the same old games over and over, my eyes feel ancient and jaded and my heart weary and cynical.”
Please don't try to watch others - that is none of your business. If they have decided to play the old games, if they want to play the old games, if they are happy in playing their old games, who are you to interfere? Who are you even to judge?
This constant hankering to judge others has to be dropped. It does not help others. It harms you, it only harms you. Why should you be bothered? That has nothing to do with you. It is others' joy if they want to remain the old and they want to move in the same rut, in the same routine. Good! It is their life and they have every right to live it their own way.
Somehow we cannot allow others to have their own way. In some way or other we go on judging. Sometimes we say they are sinners, sometimes we say they are bound to go to hell, sometimes we say they are this and that - criminals. If all that has changed, now a new evaluation that they are playing old gamesand'Iam tired'. Whyshould you betired oftheirgames? Letthem betired oftheir games ifthey want;or ifthey don'twant, thattoo istheirchoice. Please don'twatch others.
Your whole energy has to be focussed on yourself. Maybe you are condemning others for their old games just as a trick because you don't want to condemn yourself. It always happens; it is a psychological trick: we project on others. A thief thinks everybody is a thief - that is very natural for him; that is a way to protecthisego. Ifhe feelsthe whole world isbad, he feelsgood in comparison. A murderer thinks the whole world consists of murderers - that makes him feel good and at ease.
It is convenient to think the whole world consists of murderers; then he can murder and there is no need to have any guilt feeling, there is no need to have any prick of conscience.
So we go on projecting on others whatsoever we don't want to see in ourselves. Please stop that! If you are really tired of old games. then this is the old game - the OLDEST. For many lives you have been playing it: projecting YOUR defects onto others and then feeling good. And of course you have to exaggerate, you have to magnify. If you are a thief, you have to magnify others' images, that they are greater thieves than you. Then you feel good; in comparison, you are a far better person.
That's why people go on reading the newspapers. Newspapers help you very much. Early in the morning,beforeyou haveeven taken yourtea. youarereadyforthenewspaper. And the newspaper brings nothing like news, because there is nothing new. It is the same old rotten thing. But you feel good: somewhere, somebody has been murdered, somewhere there has been a Watergate, and somewhere something else, and somewhere somebody has stolen, and somebody's wife has escaped with somebody else... and so on and so forth. Watching all that, you relax; you feel, ”So, I am not so bad - the whole world is going to the dogs. I am a far better person. I have not yet escaped with the wife of the neighbor. I have not killed anybody yet - although I think of it, but thinking is not a crime where people are actually doing things.” You feel good. And the moment you feel good, you remain the same.
Please don't watch others. It is not going to help you. You use your energy, your observation, on yourself.
And there is something tremendously transforming in observation. If you observe yourself, things will start changing. If you start observing your anger, one day you will suddenly find the anger has no more energy the way it used to have; it is no more so fiery. Something has gone dead in it. If you start watching yourself, you will see, by and by, the negative is dying and the positive is becoming more and more alive; that misery is disappearing and bliss is entering into your life; that you smile more, sometimes even for no reason; that a sense of humor is arising in you - if you start watching - that old depressed, long face is disappearing. A sense of humor is born. You start taking life more playfully,ifyou watch; seriousnessbecomesmoreand moreirrelevant. Moreand more you become innocent, trusting, less and less doubtful.
I am not saying that your trust will always be respected. No, that is not the point. You may be deceived more, because when you are trusting you can be deceived more. But even when you are deceived, your trust will not be destroyed by it - in fact, it may even be enhanced. You may start thinking that even if you are deceived - somebody has taken a little money and deceived you -you will be able to see that you have saved the far more valuable thing, that is trust; and something almost valueless, the money, is gone. You could have saved the money and the trust would have gone - that would have been a far greater loss, because nobody has ever been found to be happy just because ofmoney. Butbecauseoftrust,peoplehavelived like godson earth. Because of trust, people have enjoyed life so totally that they could feel grateful to God. Trust is a benediction. Money, at the most, can give you a little comfort, but no celebration. Trust may not give you much comfort, but will give you great celebration.
Now, to choose comfort against celebration is simply stupid - because that comfortable life will be nothing but a comfortable death. Conveniently you can live and conveniently you can die, but the real taste of life is possible only when you are celebrating at the optimum, at the maximum, when your torch is burning from both ends together. Maybe only for a single moment... but the intensity of it, but the totality of it, but the wholeness of it! And this happens only through observation.
Observationisoneofthegreatestforcesoftransformation. You start observing yourself. Don'twaste your energy for observation on others - that is a sheer wastage! And nobody will ever thank you for it; it is a thankless job. And whomsoever you observe will feel offended - because NOBODY likes to be observed; everybody wants to have a private life. Good or bad, stupid or wise, but everybody wants to have his own private life. And who are you to interfere? So don't be a peeping tom, don't go to people'skeyholes, and don'twatch. ItisTHEIRlife. Iftheywantand ifthey love to playthe old game, let them play!
So the first thing: please stop watching other people; turn the whole energy on yourself.
Second thing you say: ”I guess it's because I'm seeing more and more my own games and tricks and Ihearyourmaddening voicebetween my ears saying,'That's okay - just you havetoacceptand love yourself, and there is no problem.' ”
I have to repeat it: There is no problem. I have never come across a real problem - not up to now. And I must have listened to thousands of people and their thousands of problems. I have not come acrossareal problem yet. AndIdon'tthinkthatitisevergoingtohappen-becausetherealproblem exists not.'Problem' is a created thing. Situations are there: problems are not there. Problems are your interpretations of situations. The same situation may not be a problem to one person and may be a problem to somebody else.
So it depends on you whether you create a problem or you don't create a problem but problems are not there. Problems are not in existence: they are in the psychology of man.
Just look next time you are having some trip and riding a problem just watch. Just stand aside and look at the problem. Is it really there? or have you created it? Look deeply into it, and you will suddenly see it is not increasing, it is decreasing; it is becoming smaller and smaller. The more you put your energy into observation, the smaller it becomes. And a moment comes when suddenly it is not there... and you will have a good laugh.
Whenever you are having aproblem, just look at it. Problems are fictitious, they don'texist. Justgo around the problem, look from every angle - how can it be? It is a ghost! You wanted it, that's why it is there. You asked for it, that's why it is there. You invited it, that's why it is there.
But people don't like it if you say their problem is not a problem - they don't like it. They feel very bad. Ifyou listen to their problemstheyfeel very good. And ifyou say, ”Yes, this is a great problem,” they are very happy. That's why psychoanalysis has become one of the most important things of this century. The psychoanalyst helps nobody - maybe he helps himself, but he helps nobody else. He cannot. But still people go and pay. They enjoy - he accepts their problems; whatsoever absurd problem you bring to the psychoanalyst, he listens to it very sincerely and seriously, as if it is there. He takes it for granted that you are suffering greatly, and he starts working on it and analyzing it. And it takes years!
Even after years of psychoanalysis the problem is not solved-because in the first place the problem has never been there, so how can anybody solve it? But after years of psychoanalysis, you get tired; and you get finished with the old problem, you want some new problem now. So one day you suddenly say, ”Yes, it is no more there, it is gone,” and you thank the psychoanalyst. But it is simply time that has helped, that has healed. It is not psychoanalysis. But there are people who would not like simply to wait and watch.
WhenyoubringamadpersontoaZenmonastery,theysimplyputhiminacorner,inasmallhut,far away from the monastery; they give him food and they tell him, ”Just be there, quiet.” Nobody goes to talk to him; food is supplied, his comforts are looked after, but nobody bothers about him. And what psychoanalysis does in three years, they do in three weeks. Within three weeks the person simply comes out and he says, ”Yes, the problem is finished.”
For three weeks you are left with your problem - how can you avoid seeing it? And no analysis is given,sothereisnodiversion;youarenotdistracted.Thepsychoanalystdistractsyou!Theproblem may have died on its own within three weeks, but it will not die now because with the support of the psychoanalyst it will live for three years, or even more. It depends how rich you are. If you are rich enough, the problem can continue for your whole life. That means it depends how much you can afford.
Poor people don't suffer from many problems. Rich people suffer they can afford to. They can enjoy the game of having great problems. The poor person cannot afford and cannot enjoy that game.
Next time you are having a problem, look into it, look HARD into it. No need for any analysis; don't analyze it, because analysis is a way of diversion. When you start analyzing, you don't look at the problem. You start asking why? from where? how did it come? - in your childhood, your mother's relationship with you, your father's relationship with you. You have gone astray. Now you are not looking into the problem itself. Freudian psychoanalysis is really a mind-game. and played with great expertise.
Don't go into the causes! There is no need because there is no cause. Don't go into the past there is no need because that will be going away from the present problem. LOOK into it as a herenow thing, just enter into it. And don't think about causes, reasons. Just watch the problem as it is.
And you will be surprised that looking hard into it, it starts dispersing. Go on looking into it and you will find it has gone.
PROBLEMS ARE NOT THERE. We create them - because we cannot live without problems. That is the only reason why we create them. To have a problem is to have an occupation. One feels good; something is there to do. When there is no problem you are left alone, empty - what to do next? All problems finished.
Just think: one day comes God and says, ”No problems any more - finished! All problems gone.” What will you do? Just think of that day. People will be stuck; people will start getting very angry aboutGod.Theywillsay,”Thisisnotablessing!Nowwhatarewesupposedtodo?Noproblems?” Then suddenly the energy is not moving anywhere; then you will feel stagnant. The problem is a way for you to move, to go on, to carry on, to hope, to desire, to dream. The problem gives so many possibilities to remain occupied.
And to be unoccupied, or to be capable of unoccupation, is what I call meditation: an unoccupied mind who enjoys a moment of unoccupation is a meditative mind.
Start enjoying some unoccupied moments. Even if the problem is there - you feel it is there, I say it is not, but you feel it is there - put the problem aside and tell the problem, ”Wait! Life is there, the whole life is there. I will solve you, but right now let me have a little space unoccupied by any problem.” Start having a few moments unoccupied, and once you have enjoyed them you will see the fact that problems are created by you because you were not capable of enjoying the unoccupied moments. So problems fill the gap.
Have you not watched yourself? Sitting in a room, if you have nothing to do you start feeling fidgety, you start feeling uncomfortable, you start feeling restless - you will turn the radio on, or you will, turn the TV on, or you will start reading the same newspaper you have read three times since the morning. Or, if there is only one way, you will fall asleep so that you can create dreams and again remain occupied. Or you will start smoking. Have you watched it? Whenever you are not having anything to do, it becomes very difficult to be, just to be.
I will say again: There is no problem, Anando. Look into the fact of it that there is NO problem in life. If you want to have it, it is your pleasure - you enjoy with all my blessings But the truth is that there is no problem.
Life is not a problem at all - it is a mystery to be lived and enjoyed. Problems are created by you because you are afraid to enjoy life and you are afraid to live life. Problems give you a protection - AGAINST life, against joy, against love. You can say to yourself, ”HOW can I enjoy? - I am having so many problems. How can I enjoy? I am having so many problems, how can I love a man or a woman? I am having so many problems, how can I dance and sing? - impossible!” You can find some reasons not to sing, not to dance. Your problems give you a great opportunity to avoid.
Lookintotheproblemsandyouwillfindtheyarefictitious.
And even if you are having a problem and you feel it is real, I say it is okay. Why do I say it is okay? Becausethemomentyoustartfeelingitisokay,itwilldisappear.Themomentyousaytoaproblem that it is okay, you have stopped giving energy to it. You have accepted it! The moment you accept a problem, it is no more a problem. A problem can be a problem only when you go on rejecting it, when you say it should NOT be so... and it is. Then the problem is strengthened.
That's why I say it. People come to me with their big problems and I say, ”It is okay, it is very good, you accept it.” And I say, ”Just you have to accept and love yourself.” And I understand, Anando says, ”It is very maddening, your voice continuously saying, ”That's okay... and there is no problem.”'
”JUST???!”
And Anando says, ”I think if you say this word again I will scream.”
You have been screaming your whole life - whether you scream or not is not the point - you have been screaming your whole life. You have not done anything else up to now. Sometimes loudly, sometimes silently, but you have been screaming. That's how I see people - screaming people, theirheartisscreaming, theirbeing is screaming. Butthatwillnothelp. You can scream butthatwill not help.
Try to understand rather than screaming. Try to see what I am telling you. And what I am telling you is not a theory - it is a fact. And I am saying it because I have known it that way. If it can happen to me that there is no problem, why cannot it happen to you? Take the challenge of it! I am just as ordinary aman as you are;Idon'tclaim any extraordinary miraculous powers.
I am very ordinary, just as you are. The only difference between me and you is you don't say okay to yourself and I have said an absolute okay to myself - that is the only difference. Youarecontinuously trying to improve yourself and I am not trying to improve myself. I have said: Incompletion is the way life is. You are trying to become perfect and I have accepted my imperfections. That is the only difference.
So I don't have any problems. When you accept your imperfection, from where can the problem come? When whatsoever happens you say ”It is okay,” then from WHERE can the problem come? When you accept limitations, then from where can the problem come? The problem arises out of your non-acceptance. You cannot accept the way you are, hence the problem. And you will never accept the way you are, so the problem will always be there. Can you imagine yourself some day accepting, totally accepting thewayyou are? Ifyou can imagine, then whydon'tyou doitrightnow? Why wait? For whom? For what?
I have accepted the way I am, and that very moment all problems disappeared. That very moment all worries disappeared. Not that I became perfect, but I started enjoying my imperfections. Nobody ever becomes perfect - because to become perfect means to become absolutely dead. Perfection is not possible because life is eternal. Perfection is not possible because life goes on and on and on - there is no end to it.
So the ONLY way to get out of these so-called problems is to accept your life as you find it right this moment, and live it, enjoy, delight in it. The next moment will be of more joy because it will come out of this moment; and the next to that will be of even more joy because, by and by, you will become more and more joyous. Not that you will become joyous through improvement, but by living the moment.
But you will remain imperfect. You will always have limitations, and you will always have situations where, if you want to crate problems, you can immediately create. If you don't want to create problems, there is no need to create. You can scream but that won't help. That's what you have been doing - that has not helped.
Even primal therapy has not proved of much help. It allows people to scream - yes, it feels a little good, it is a tantrum therapy. It allows you to vomit. It feels a little good because you feel a little unloaded, unburdened, butthenwithinafewdaysthateuphoriadisappears;againyouarethesame, again accumulating. Again go to the primal therapy - you will feel good for a few days... again the same.
Unless you understand that one has to STOP creating problems, you will go on creating problems. You can go into an encounter group, you can do primal therapy, you can do thousands of other
groups, and after each group you will feel tremendously beautiful, because you dropped something that was on your head-BUTYOU HAVE NOT DROPPED THE MECHANISM THAT CREATES IT. You have dropped something which youwere having, butyouhave notdroppedtheveryfactorythat goes on creating it. Again you will create. It will not be of much use. It will give you a respite, a rest.
But if you REALLY understand the thing. the thing is that you have to stop creating problems - otherwise you can go from one group to another group, from one psychoanalyst to another psychoanalyst, from one psychiatrist to another psychiatrist, from one therapy to another therapy... and everybody will give you a little respite, a little rest, and again you are doing the same thing.
My whole effort here is to cut the problem from the very roots. Please don't create problems - they are not, they exist not.
And the last thing Anando says, ”Wasn't I happier when I thought there was a goal?”
Yes, youwere happier and youwere more miserable too -because your happiness was in the hope; itwasnotatrue happiness. So Isay youwerehappierandmore miserable too. Miserable you were here in the present, and happy you were in the future - but how can you be in the future? The goal is in the future.
Unhappy you were here; happy you were there.'There' exists not - it is all here. It is ALWAYS here. Everywhere it is here!'There' exists only in the dictionary. So it is with'then'. It is always now.'Then' exists not. Yes, you were happier in your dreams of thinking of a goal, of thinking of a beautiful future. But why does a person think about a beautiful future? - because he is miserable in the present.
I don't think about a beautiful future. I cannot conceive how it can be more beautiful! How can it be more beautiful than it is right now this moment? How is existence going to be more happy and joyous than it is this moment? Have a look - how can it be more happy, more joyful? But that's a trick, again a trick of the mind: to avoid the present we go on thinking about the future so that we need not see the present. And the present is all there is.
So you are right - you were happier, happier in your dreams. Now I have shattered all your dreams. Happier in your hopes - now I am trying in every way to create the state of hopelessness, so there is no hope left. I AM TRYING TO BRING YOU TO THE PRESENT. You have been wandering in the future; I am pulling you back to herenow. It is hard work. And to take goals away one feels very angry. You ARE sometimes very angry with me. Ihave taken yourhope, yourdreams, orIam trying you are clinging to them; you are so addicted to your hope that you even start hoping through me.
You start hoping through me: ”Osho will do this.” This man is not going to do anything. You start hoping that ”Now I am with Osho so there is no need to be afraid. Sooner or later I am going to become Enlightened.” Forget all about it! ENLIGHTENMENTISNOTAHOPE!Itis notadesire and it is not in the future. If you start living right this moment, you are Enlightened. I am trying to make you Enlightened every day, and you say, ”Tomorrow.” Then as you will... but tomorrow it will never happen. Either it is now or never!
Become Enlightened right now! And you can become because you are... simply deluded, simply thinking that you are not.
So don't ask how. The moment you ask the how, you start hoping. So DON'T ask the how, and don't say, ”Yes, we will become.” I am not saying that. I am saying you are. Somendra!... the goose IS out. The goose has never been in. One just has to be alert in the moment. Just a single moment of alertness, a shock, and you are free.
Every day I am trying to make you Enlightened, because I know you ARE Enlightened. But if you want to go on playing the game of Samsara, you can go on playing.
Happier, certainly, you were - and miserable too. I have taken your happiness because you cannot hope any more. If you allow me a little more, I will take your misery too. But first the happiness has to go, because misery exists as a shadow to the hope of happiness. So first the hope of happiness has to go, only then will the shadow go.
So you can scream ifyou want to scream, butIwill repeatathousand and onetimes: Anando, there is no problem. Just you have to accept and love yourself -yes, JUST.
The fourth question:
Question 4
ISN'T TANTRA A WAY OF INDULGENCE?
IT IS NOT. It is the ONLY way to get out of indulgence. It is the only way to get out of sexuality. No otherway has everbeen helpful forman;all otherways have made man more and more sexual.
Sex has not disappeared. The religions have made it only more poisoned. It is still there - in a poisoned form. Yes, guilt has arisen in man, but sex has not disappeared. It CANNOT disappear because it is a biological-reality. It is existential; it cannot simply disappear by repressing it. It can disappear only when you become so alien that you can release the energy encapsulated in sexuality - not by repression is the energy released, but by understanding. And once the energy is released, out of the mud the lotus The lotus has to come UP out of the mud, it has to go higher, and
repression takes it deeper into the mud. It goes on repressing it.
Whatyouhavedoneuptonow, thewholehumanity, isrepressingsexinthemud oftheunconscious. Go on repressing it, sit on top of it; don't allow it to move; kill it by fasting, by discipline, by going to a cave in the Himalayas, by moving to a monastery where a woman is not allowed. There are monasterieswhereawoman hasneverentered forhundredsofyears;thereare monasterieswhere onlynunshave lived and aman hasneverentered. These are ways of repressing. ANDtheycreate more and more sexuality and more and more dreams of indulgence.
No, Tantra is not a way of indulgence. It is the only way of freedom. Tantra says: Whatsoever is has to be understood and through understanding changes occur of their own accord.
So listening to me or listening to Saraha, don't start thinking that Saraha is supporting your indulgence. You will be in bad shape if you accept that. Listen to this story:
An elderly gent named Martin went to a doctor for an examination. ”I want you to tell me what's wrong, doctor. Ifeel some pains here and there, and I can't understand it. I've lived avery clean life -nosmoking,drinking orrunning around. I'm in bed,alone,atnine o'clockeverynight. Whyshould I feel this way?”
”How old are you?” asked the doctor.
”I'll be seventy-four on my next birthday,” said Martin.
The doctor answered, ”After all, you're getting on in years, you've got to expect things like that. But you've lots of time left yet. Just take it easy, and don't worry. I suggest you go to Hot Springs.”
So Martin went to Hot Springs. There he met another gent who looked so old and decrepit that Martin felt encouraged by the comparison. ”Brother,” says Martin, ”you sure must have taken good care of yourself, living to such a ripe old age. I've lived a quiet, clean life, but not like you, I'll bet. What is your formula for obtaining a ripe old age like you have reached?”
So this shriveled old guy says, ”On the contrary, sir. When I was seventeen my father told me,'Son, you go and enjoy life. Eat, drink and be merry to your heart's content. Live life to the fullest. Instead ofmarrying onewoman,beabachelorandhaveten. Spend yourmoneyforfun,foryourself,instead of on a wife and kids.' Yeah: wine, women and song, life lived to the full. That's been my policy all my life, brother!”
”Sounds like you got something,” said Martin. ”How old are you'?”
The other answered, ”Twenty-four.”
Indulgence is suicidal - as suicidal as repression. These are the two extremes that Buddha says to avoid. One extreme is repression, the other extreme is indulgence. Just be in the middle; neither be repressive, nor be indulgent. Just be in the middle, watchful, alert, aware. It is your life! Neither does it have to be repressed, nor does it have to be wasted - it has to be understood.
It is your life - take care of it! love it! befriend it! If you can befriend your life, it will reveal many mysteries to you, it will take you to the very door of God.
But Tantra is not indulgence at all. The repressive people have always thought that Tantra is indulgence; their minds are so much obsessed. For example: a man who goes to a monastery and lives there without ever seeing a woman, how can he believe that Saraha is not indulging when he lives with a woman? Not only lives but practises strange things: sitting before the woman naked, the woman is naked, and he goeson watching the woman; oreven whilemaking love to the woman he goes on watching.
Now, you cannot watch his watching; you can see only that he is making love to a woman. And if you are repressive, your whole repressed sexuality will bubble up. You must start going mad! And you will project all thatyou have repressed in yourselfon Saraha-and Sarahaisnotdoing anything like that; he is moving in a totally different dimension. He is not really interested in the body: he wants to see what this sexuality is; he wants to see what this appeal of orgasm is; he wants to see what exactly orgasm is; he wantsto be meditative in thatpeakmoment,so thathe can find the clue and the key... maybe there is the key to open the doorofthe Divine. In fact,itis there.
God has hidden the key in your sexuality. On the one hand, through your sex, life survives; that is only partial use of your sex energy. On another hand, if you move with full awareness in your sex energy, you will find thatyou have come across a key that can helpyou toenterintoeternal life. One small aspect of sex is that your children will live. The other aspect, a higher aspect, is that you can live in eternity. Sex energy is life energy.
Ordinarily we don't move further than the porch, we never go into the palace. Saraha is trying to go into the palace. Now, the people who came to the king, they must have been suppressed people as all people are suppressed.
The politician and the priest HAVE to teach suppression,. because it is only through suppression that people are driven insane. And you can rule insane people more easily than sane people. And when people are insane in their sex energy, they start moving in other directions - money they will start moving towards, or power, or prestige. They have to show their sex energy somewhere or other; it is boiling there - they have to release it in some way or other. So money-madness or power-addiction, they become their releases.
This whole society is sex-obsessed. If sex-obsession disappears from the world, people will not be money-mad. Who will bother about money? And people will not be bothered by power. Nobody will like to become a president or a prime minister - for what?! Life is so tremendously beautiful in its ordinariness, it is so superb in its ordinariness, why should one want to become somebody? By being nobody it is so delicious - nothing is missing. But if you destroy people's sexuality and make them repressed, so much is missing that they are always hankering: somewhere there must be joy - here it is missing.
Sex is one of the activities given by nature and God in which you are thrown again and again to the present moment. Ordinarily you are never in the present - except when you are making love, and then too for a few seconds only.
Tantra says one has to understand sex, to decode sex. If sex is so vital that life comes out of it, then there must be something more to it. That something more is the key towards Divinity, towards God.
The fifth question:
Question 5
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU SAY, I READ YOUR BOOKS AND ENJOY THEM TREMENDOUSLY, BUT STILL SOMETHING VERY ESSENTIAL IS MISSING.
MEDITATE ON THESE beautiful words of Wordsworth:
THE WORLD IS TOO MUCH WITH US, LATE AND SOON,
GETTING AND SPENDING, WE LAY WASTE OUR POWERS.
LITTLE WE SEE IN NATURE THAT'S OURS,
WE HAVE GIVEN OUR HEARTS AWAY, A SORDID BOON,
THIS SEA THAT BARES HER BOSOM TO THE MOON,
THE WINDS THAT WILL BE HOWLING AT ALL HOURS
AND ARE UPGATHERED NOW LIKE SLEEPING FLOWERS;
FOR THIS, FOR EVERYTHING, WEAREOUTOFTUNE
IT MOVES US NOT
That's what is missing. IT MOVES US NOT we are out of tune with existence. This WORLD
IS TOO MUCH WITH US. . . GETTING AND SPENDING, WE LAY WASTE OUR POWERS. LITTLE WE SEE IN NATURE How can you find God and how can you find bliss if you don't look into
nature? Nature is manifested God. Nature is God's body, God's form, God's temple.
WE HAVE GIVEN OUR HEARTS AWAY. . . . That'swhatismissing.
FOR THIS, FOR EVERYTHING, WEAREOUTOFTUNE
IT MOVES US NOT
So just reading and listening to me will not help much... start feeling. Listening, feel too not only listen. Listening, listen too through the heart. Letitsinkintoyourfeelingaspect. Thatisthemeaning whenallthereligionssaySHRADDHA-faith,trust-isneeded. Trustmeansawayoflisteningfrom the heart - not through doubt, not through logic, not through reasoning, not through discursive intellect, but through a deep participation through the heart.
As you listen to music, listen to me that way. Don't listen to me as you listen to a philosopher; listen to me as you listen to the birds. Listen to me as you listen to a waterfall. Listen to me as you listen to the wind blowing through the pines. Listen to me, not through the discursive mind, but through the participant heart. And then something that you are continuously feeling is missing will not be missed.
Theheadhasbecometoomuchofanexpert;ithasgonetotheveryextreme. Itisagoodinstrument; yes, as a slave the head is wonderful - as a boss it is very dangerous. It has gone to the very extreme. It has absorbed all your energies. It has become dictatorial. Of course, it works, but because it works you have started depending on it too much. And one can always go to the extreme, and mind tends to go to the extreme.
Young Warren was very ambitious, and when he got a job as an office boy he was determined to learn everything possible so that he could impress the boss and get ahead. One day the boss called for him and said, ”Tell the traffic department to book me a passage on the Queen Mary, sailing on the eleventh.”
”Excuse me, sir,” said the lad, ”but that ship doesn't sail until the twelfth.”
The boss looked at him, impressed. Then he said, ”Have the purchasing department put an immediateorderforasixmonths'supplyofaluminium.”
”May I suggest,” answered Warren, ”that the order be placed tomorrow, because the price will be reduced. In addition, order only one month's supply because the trend of the market indicates the price will go lower.”
”Very good, young man, you're on the ball. Send Miss Kate in to take some dictation.”
”Miss Kate is out today,” the boy replied.
”What's the matter, is she sick?”
”No, sir, not until the ninth.”
Now this is knowing too much, this is going too far. And that's what has happened to the human mind: it has gone too far, it has crossed itslimit. And it has absorbed all the energy so nothing is left for the heart. You have completely bypassed your heart. You don't go through the heart. That way youdon'tmoveanymore.Heartisalmostadeadthing,adeadweight. That's what is missing.
You can listen to me through the head, and of course you will understand whatsoever I am saying - and still you will not understand anything, not a single word, because this is an understanding of a totally different kind. This is an understanding which is more akin to love than to knowledge.
If you are in love with me, only then... if you have started feeling for me, only then... if an affection is growing between me and you, if it is a love affair, only then
And the last question:
Question 6
OSHO, HOW DO YOU DEFINE A GOOD SPEECH?
DIFFICULT TO SAY. I have never delivered a single speech in my life. You are asking a wrong person. But I have heard a definition that I liked and I would like you to know it:
A good beginning and a good ending make a good speech - if they come really close together, the beginning and the end. Of course, the best speech has no middle at all, and the very best is never delivered.
AndIhavealwaysbeendeliveringtheverybest,theundeliveredone.Ihaveneverdeliveredasingle speech in my life, because I deal in silence, not in words. Even when you hear words, that was not the purpose. Even when I use the words, the words are used only as necessary evils - because they have to be used, because you cannot understand silence yet.
Iamnottalkingtoyou.Ihavenothingtosay,becausethatwhichIhavecannotbesaid,itcannotbe discoursed about. But you don't understand anything else but words, so I have to suffer, I have to use words which are meaningless. And I have to say things which should not be said - in the hope that by and by you will start looking more directly into me; by and by, you will not listen to the words but to the message.
Remember: the medium is not the message. The words are not my message. The message is wordless.
I am trying to hand you the undelivered speech. It is a transfer beyond words, so only those who are joined with me through their hearts will be able to receive it.





 

23 April 1977 am in Buddha Hall
AS A CLOUD THAT RISES FROM THE SEA ABSORBING RAIN, THE EARTH EMBRACES, SO, LIKE THE SKY, THE SEA REMAINS WITHOUT INCREASING OR DECREASING.
SO FROM SPONTANEITY THAT'S UNIQUE,
REPLETE WITH THE BUDDHA'S PERFECTIONS, ARE ALL SENTIENT BEINGS BORN, AND IN IT COME TO REST. BUT IT IS NEITHER CONCRETE NOR ABSTRACT. THEY WALK OTHER PATHS AND SO FORSAKE TRUE BLISS, SEEKING THE DELIGHTS THAT STIMULANTS PRODUCE. THE HONEY IN THEIR MOUTHS, AND TO THEM SO NEAR, WILL VANISH IF AT ONCE THEY DO NOT DRINK IT.
BEASTS DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE WORLD
TO BE A SORRY PLACE. NOT SO THE WISE
WHO THE HEAVENLY NECTAR DRINK
WHILE BEASTS HUNGER FOR THE SENSUAL.
EVERYTHING CHANGES... and Heraclitus is right: you cannot step in the same river twice. The river is changing, so are you changing too. It is all movement. It is all flux. Everything is impermanent, momentary. Only for a moment it is there, and then gone... and you will never find it again. There is no way to find it again. Once gone it is gone for ever.
And nothing changes - that too is true. Nothing ever changes. All is always the same. Parmeneides is also right; he says: There is nothing new under the sun. How can there be? The sun is old, so is everything. If you ask Parmeneides, he will say you can step in any river you want - but you will be stepping in the same river always. Whether it is the Ganges or the Thames does not make any difference. THE WATER IS THE SAME! It is all H20. And whether you step in the river today or tomorrow, or after millions of years, it will be the same river.
And how can you be different? You were a child; you remember it. Then you were a young man; you remember that too. Then you became old; that too you remember. Who is this one who goes on remembering? There must be a non-changing element in you -unchanging, permanent, absolutely permanent. Childhood comes and goes; so comes youth and is gone, so old age - but something remains eternally the same.
Now, let me say to you: Heraclitus and Parmeneides, both are right - in fact, they both are right together. If Heraclitus is right, it is only half the truth; if Parmeneides is right, that too is only half the truth. And half the truth is not the true thing. They are stating half-truths. The wheel moves and the hub does not move. Parmeneides talks about the hub, Heraclitus talks about the wheel - but the wheel cannot exist without the hub! And what use is a hub without the wheel? So those two contradictory looking half-truths are not contradictory but complementary. Heraclitus and Parmeneides are not enemies but friends. The other can stand only if the complementary truth is there - otherwise not.
Meditate on the silent centre of a cyclone
But the moment you state something, it can at the most be only half the truth. No statement can cover the whole truth. If any statement wants to cover the whole truth, then the statement will have to be of necessity self-contradictory, then it will have to be of necessity illogical. Then the statement will look crazy.
Mahavir did that - he is the craziest man because he tried to state the whole truth and nothing but the whole truth. He drives you crazy, because each statement is immediately followed by its contradiction. He developed a sevenfold pattern of statements. One is followed by its contradiction, that is followed by its contradiction... so on and so forth. He goes on contradicting seven times, and only when he has said seven times, seven different things contradictory to each other, then he says now the truth is told perfectly - but then you don't know what he has said.
If you ask him: ”God is?” he will say, ”Yes,” and he will say, ”No,” and he will say, ”Both,” and he will say, ”Both not,” and so on and so forth he goes Finally you don't come to any conclusion; you
cannot conclude. He does not give you any chance to conclude. He leaves you hanging in the air.
This is one possibility if you are insistent on saying the truth.
The other possibility is that of Buddha - he keeps silent, knowing that whatsoever you say will be only half. And half is dangerous. He does not say anything about ultimate truths. He will not say the world is a flux, and he will not say that the world is permanent. He will not say that you are, and he will not say that you are not. The moment you ask anything about the absolute truth, he prohibits. Hesays, ”Please don't ask, becausebyyourquestionyouwillputmeintotrouble. EitherIhavetobe contradictory, which is going crazy; or I have to utter a half-truth, which is not truth and dangerous; or I have to keep quiet.” These are the three possibilities: Buddha has chosen to keep silent.
This is the first thing to be understood about today's sutras, then with this context it will be easy to understand what Saraha is saying.
The first sutra:
AS A CLOUD THAT RISES FROM THE SEA
ABSORBINGRAIN, THE EARTH EMBRACES,
SO, LIKE THE SKY, THE SEA REMAINS
WITHOUT INCREASING OR DECREASING.
HE IS SAYING to the king: Look at the sky. There are two Phenomena - the sky and the cloud. The cloud comes and goes. The sky never comes and never goes. The cloud is there sometimes, and sometimes it is not there - it is a time phenomenon, it is momentary. The sky is always there - it is a timeless phenomenon, it is eternity. The clouds cannot corrupt it, not even the black clouds can corrupt it. There is no possibility of corrupting it. Its purity is absolute, its purity is untouchable. Its purity is always virgin - you cannot violate it. Clouds can come and go, and they have been coming and going, but the sky is as pure as ever, not even a trace is left behind.
So there are two things in existence: something is like the sky and something is like the cloud. Your actions are like the cloud - they come and go. You? - you are like the sky: you never come and you never go. Your birth, your death, are like the clouds - they happen. You? - you never happen; you are always there.
Things happen in you: you never happen.
Things happen just like clouds happen in the sky. You are a silent watcher of the whole play of clouds. Sometimes they are white and beautiful and sometimes they are dark and dismal and very ugly; sometimes they are full of rain and sometimes they are just empty. Sometimes they do great benefit to the earth, sometimes great harm. Sometimes they bring floods and destruction, and sometimes they bring life, more greenery, more crops. BUT the sky remains all the time the same good or bad, divine or devilish, the clouds don't corrupt it.
Actions are clouds, doings are clouds: the being is like the sky.
Saraha is saying: Look at my sky! Don't look at my actions. It needs a shift of awareness - nothing else, just a shift of awareness. It needs a change of gestalt. You are looking at the cloud, you are focussed on the cloud, you have forgotten the sky. Then suddenly you remember the sky. You unfocus on the cloud, you focus on the sky then the cloud is irrelevant, then you are in a totally different dimension.
Justtheshiftoffocussing... and the world isdifferent. When you watch aperson'sbehavior,youare focussing on the cloud. When you watch the innermost purity of his being, you are watching his sky. If you watch the innermost purity, then you will never see anybody evil, then the whole existence is holy. If yousee the actions, then you cannotsee anybody holy. Even the holiest person is prone to commit many faults as far as actions are concerned. If you watch the actions you can find wrong actions in Jesus, in Buddha, in Mahavir, in Krishna, in Ram then even the greatest saint will look like a sinner.
There are many books written about Jesus. He is the object of thousands of studies; many are written in favour of him which prove that he is the only begotten son of God. Of course, they can prove it. Then many are written to prove that he is just a neurotic and nothing else - and they can also prove it. And they are talking about the same person. What is happening? How do they manage? They manage well. One party goes on choosing the white clouds; another party goes on choosing the black clouds - and both are there, because no action can be just white or just black. To be, it has to be both.
Whatsoever you do will bring some good into the world and will bring some bad into the world - WHATSOEVER you do. Just the very choice that you did something - many things will be good and many things will be wrong after that. You think of any action: you go and you give some money to a beggar - you are doing good; but the beggar goes and purchases some poison and commits suicide. Now, your intention was good but the total result is bad. You help a man - he is ill - you serve him; you take him to the hospital. And then he is healthy, well, and he commits murder. Now, without your help there would have been one murder less in the world. Your intention was good, but the total result is bad.
So whether to judge by the intention or to judge by the result? And who knows about your intention? Intention isinternal... maybe deep down youwere hoping thatwhen hegothealthyhewould commit a murder.
AND sometimes it happens: your intention is bad and the result is good. You throw a rock at a person,and he was suffering from migraineformanyyears,and therockhithishead and since then the migraine has disappeared - now what to do? What to say about your act? - moral, immoral? Youwanted tokill theman: youcould onlykill themigraine. That's how acupuncture was born. Such a great science! so beneficial! one of the greatest boons to humanity... but it was born in this way.
Aman was suffering from headaches formanyyears,and somebody,his enemy,wanted to kill him. Hiding behind a tree, the enemy shot an arrow. The arrow hit the man's leg; he fell down but his headache disappeared. The people who were looking after him, the doctor of the town, were very much puzzled as to how it happened. They started studying. By chance, by coincidence, the man had hit one acupuncture point just on the leg; some point was touched on the leg by the arrow, was hit by the arrow, and the inner electric flow of the man's body energy changed. And because the inner flow of the electricity changed, his headache disappeared.
That's why when you go to the acupuncturist and you say, ”I have a headache,” he may not touch your head at all. He may start pressing your feet or your hand, or he may needle your hand or your back. And you will be surprised: ”What are you doing? because my HEAD is wrong, not my back!” But he knows better. The whole body is an interconnected electric phenomenon; there are seven hundred points, and he knows from where to push the energy to change the flow. Everything is interconnected... but this is how acupuncture was born.
Now, the man who shot the arrow at his enemy, was he a great saint? or was he a sinner? Difficult to say, very difficult to say.
If you watch the actions, then it is up to you. You can choose the good ones, you can choose the bad ones. And in the total reality, each act brings something good and something bad. In fact - this is my understanding, meditate on it - whatsoever you do, the goodness of it and the badness of it is always in the same proportion. Let me repeat: it is always in the same proportion! because good and bad are two aspects of the same coin. You may do good, but something bad is bound to happen because where will the other aspect go? You may do bad, but good is bound to happen because where will the other aspect go? The coin exists with both aspects together, and a single aspect cannot exist alone.
So sinners are sometimes beneficial and saints are sometimes very harmful. Saints and sinners are both in the same boat! Once you understand this then a change is possible; then you don't look at the actions. If the proportion is the same whether you do good or bad, then what is the point of judging a man by his actions? Then change the whole emphasis. Then move to another gestalt - the sky.
That's what Saraha is saying to the king. He is saying: Right you are! People have told you and they are not wrong. I run like a mad dog. Yes, if you just watch the action you will be misguided, you will not be able to understand me. WATCH my inner sky. Watch my inner priority, watch my inner core - that's the only way to see the truth. Yes, I live with this woman - and, ordinarily, living with a woman means what it means. Now, Saraha says, WATCH! This is NO ordinary living! There is no man-woman relationship at all. It has nothing to do with sexuality. We live together as two spaces. We live together as two freedoms. We live together as two empty boats. But you have to look into the sky not into the clouds.
AS A CLOUD THAT RISES FROM THE SEA
ABSORBINGRAIN, THE EARTH EMBRACES,
SO, LIKE THE SKY, THE SEA REMAINS
WITHOUT INCREASING OR DECREASING.
And another thing he reminds him of: Watch the sea. Millions of clouds rise out of the sea, so much water evaporates, but the sea does not decrease because of that. And then the clouds will rain on the earth, and rivulets will become great rivers, and many rivers will be flooded, and the water will rush back towards the ocean, towards the sea... all the rivers of the earth will pour down their water into the sea, but that does not make the sea increase - the sea remains the same. Whether something istaken outofitorsomething is.poured intoitmakesnodifference-itsperfection issuch that you cannot take anything out of it and you cannot add anything to it.
He is saying: Look! the inner being is so perfect that your actions may be those of a sinner, but nothing istaken away. And youractionsmaybe those ofasaint, butnothing isadded unto you. You remain the same.
It is a tremendously revolutionary saying. It is a great statement. He says: Nothing can be added to man and nothing can be deleted from man - his inner perfection is such. You cannot make man more beautiful and you cannot make man ugly. You cannot make him more rich. you cannot make him poor. He is like the sea.
In one of the Buddhist sutras, Vaipulya sutra, there is a statement that there are two very costly jewels in the ocean - the one prevents it from becoming less when water is drawn from it, and the other from becoming too large when water flows in it.
Two great jewels are there in the ocean, and those two great jewels prevent it from increasing and decreasing: it never becomes less and it never becomes more - it just remains the same. It is so vast, it does not matter how many clouds arise out of it and how much water evaporates. It is so vast, itdoes notmatter howmany rivers fall into itand bring greatamounts of water. Itjustremains the same.
So is the inner core of man. So is the inner core of existence. Increase and decrease is on the periphery, notatthe centre. You can becomeaman of great knowledge, oryou can remain ignorant - that is only on the periphery. No knowledge can make you more knowing than you already are. Nothing can be added to you. Your purity is infinite; there is no way to improve upon it.
This is the Tantra vision. This is the very core of the Tantra attitude - that man is as he is. There is no hankering for improvement; not that man has to become good; not that man has to change this and that. Man has to accept all - and remember his sky!, and remember his sea. And, by and by. an understanding arises when you know what a cloud is and what the sky is, what a river is and what the sea is.
Once you are in tune with your sea, all anxiety disappears, all guilt disappears. You become innocent like a child.
The king had known Saraha: He used to be a great man of knowledge and now he is behaving like an ignorant man. He has stopped reciting his Vedas, he no more does his rituals that his religion prescribes - he no more even meditates. He does nothing that is ordinarily thought to be religious. What is he doing here living on a cremation ground? dancing like a madman, singing like a madman? and doing many untraditional things? Where has his knowledge gone?
And Saraha says: You can take all my knowledge away. It does not make any difference because I am not lessened by it. Or you can bring all the scriptures of the world and pour them into me - that doesn'tmake any difference because I don't become more because ofthat.
He was a very respectable man; the whole kingdom had respected him. Now suddenly he has become one of the most unrespectable men. And Saraha is saying: You can give me all the honors thatarepossible,andnothingisaddeduntome.Andyoucantakeallthehonors,andyoucaninsult me, and you can do whatsoever you want to destroy my respect - nothing is happening. ALL the same, I remain the same. I am THAT which never increases and never decreases. Now I know that I am not the cloud - I am the sky.
So I am not much worried whether people think the cloud is black or white, because I am not the cloud. And I am not the small river, the tiny river, or a tiny pool of water - I am not a cup of tea. Storms come in the cup of tea very easily; it is so tiny. Just take one spoonful out of it and something is lost; pour one more spoonful and it is too much and there is a flood.
He says: I am the vast sea. Now take whatsoever you want to take, or give whatsoever you want to give - either way it does not matter.
Just look at the beauty of it! The moment nothing matters, you have come home. If something still matters, you are far away from the home. If you are still watching, and being cunning and clever about your actions - you have to do this and you have not to do this - and there are still shoulds and should-nots, then you are far away from home. You still think of yourself in terms of the momentary and not in terms of the eternal. You have not yet tasted God.
Like the sky and like the sea... is you.
The second sutra:
SO FROM SPONTANEITY THAT'S UNIQUE,
REPLETE WITH THE BUDDHA'S PERFECTIONS,
ARE ALL SENTIENT BEINGS BORN, AND IN IT COME
TO REST. BUT IT IS NEITHER CONCRETE NOR ABSTRACT.
SO FROM SPONTANEITY THAT'S UNIQUE...
FIRST, IN TANTRA, spontaneity is the greatest value - to be just natural, to allow nature to happen. Not to obstruct it, not to hinder it; not to distract it, not to take it in some other direction where it was not going on its own. To surrender to nature, to flow with it. Not pushing the river, but going with it - ALL the way, wherever it leads. This trust is Tantra. Spontaneity is its mantra, its greatest foundation.
Spontaneity means: you don't interfere, you are in a let-go. Whatsoever happens, you watch, you are a witness to it. You know it is happening, but you don't jump into it, and you don't try to change its course. Spontaneity means you don't have any direction. Spontaneity means you don't have any goal to attain; if you have some goal to attain you cannot be spontaneous. How can you be spontaneous if suddenly your nature is going one way and your goal is not? How can you be spontaneous? You will drag yourself towards the goal.
That's what millions of people are doing - dragging themselves towards some imaginary goal. And because they are dragging themselves towards some imaginary goal, they are missing the natural destiny - which is the only goal! And that's why there is so much frustration, and so much misery and so much hell - because whatsoever you do will never satisfy your nature.
That'swhypeoplearedullanddead. Theylive,andyettheylivenot. Theyaremovinglikeprisoners, chained. Their movement is not that of freedom, their movement is not that of dance - it cannot be because they are fighting, they are continuously in a fight with themselves. There is a conflict, each moment: you want to eat this, and your religion does not prescribe it; you want to move with this woman, but that will not be respectable. You want to live this way, but the society prohibits it. You want to be in one way, you feel that that is how you can flower, but everybody else is against it.
So do you listen to your being? or do you listen to everybody else's advice? If you listen to everybody's advice, your life will be an empty life of nothing but frustration. You will finish without ever being alive; you will die without ever knowing what life is.
Butthesocietyhascreatedsuchconditioninginyouthatitisnotonlyoutside-itissittinginsideyou. That's what conscience is all about. Whatsoever you want to do, your conscience says, ”Don't do it!” The conscience is your parental voice; the priest and the politician speak through it. It is a great trick. They have made a conscience in you - from the very childhood when you were not aware at all of what was being done to you, they have put a conscience in you.
So whenever you go against the conscience, you feel guilt
Guilt means you have done something which others don't want you to do. So whenever you are natural you are guilty, and whenever you are not guilty you are unnatural: this is the dilemma, this is the dichotomy, this is the problem.
If you listen to your own naturalness, you feel guilty; then there is misery. You start feeling you have done something wrong. You start hiding; you start defending yourself; you start continuously pretending that you have not done it, and you are afraid - somebody is bound to catch you sooner orlater.Youwillbecaught...andanxiety,andguilt,andfear.Andyoulosealllovewithlife.
Whenever you do something against others, you feel guilty. And whenever you do something that otherssay,youneverfeelhappydoingit-becauseithasneverbeenyourownthingtodo.Between these two is man caught.
I was just reading one anecdote:
”What's this double jeopardy that the Constitution is supposed to guarantee one against?” asked Roland of his lawyer friend Milt.
Said the other, ”It is like this, Rollie, if you are out driving your car and both your wife and her mother are sitting in the back seat telling you how to drive, well that's double jeopardy. And you have a constitutional right to turn around and say, ”Now, who in hell's driving this car, dear, you or your mother?”'
You may be at the wheel, but you are not driving the car. There are many people sitting on the back seat - your parents, your parents' parents, your priest, your politician, the leader, the mahatma, the saint, they are all sitting on the back seat. And they all are trying to advise you: ”Do this! Don't do that! Go thisway! Don'tgo thatway!”Theyare driving you mad,and you have been taughtto follow them. If you don't follow them, that too creates such fear in you that something is wrong - how can you be right when so many people are advising? And they are always advising for your own good! How can you be right alone when the whole world is saying ”Do this!” Of course, they are in the majority and they must be right.
But remember: it is not a question of being right or wrong - the question basically is of being spontaneous or not. Spontaneity is right! Otherwise you will become an imitator, and imitators are never fulfilled beings.
You wanted to be a painter, but your parents said, ”No! because painting is not going to give you enough money, and painting is not going to give you any respect in society. You will become a hobo, and you will be a beggar. So don't bother about painting. Become a magistrate!” So you have become a magistrate. Nowyoudon'tfeelanyhappiness. Itisaplasticthing,thisbeing amagistrate. And deep down you still want to paint.
While sitting in the court you are still painting deep down. Maybe you are listening to the criminal, but you are thinking about his face, what a beautiful face he has and what a beautiful portrait would have been possible. You are looking at his eyes and the blueness of his eyes, and you are thinking of colors... and you are a magistrate! So you are constantly at unease, a tension follows you. And, by and by, you will also start feeling you are a respectable man and this and that. You are just an imitation, you are artificial
I have heard:
One woman gave upsmoking when her pet parrot developed apersistentcough. She was worried, naturally; she thought it must have been the smoke that she went on smoking continuously in the house and that it didn't suit the parrot. So she took the parrot to a vet. The vet gave the bird a thorough check-up and found that it didn't have pneumonia or psittacosis. The final diagnosis was that it had been imitating the cough of its cigarette-smoking owner.
It was not smoke: it was just imitating. The woman was coughing, and the parrot had learnt coughing.
Watch... your life may be just like a parrot. If it is like a parrot, then you are missing something tremendously valuable - you are missing your life. Whatsoever you gain will not prove of much value, because there is nothing more valuable than your life.
So Tantra makes spontaneity the first virtue, the most fundamental virtue.
SO FROMSPONTANEITY THAT'S UNIQUE...
NOW, ONE MORE THING TANTRA SAYS, and that has to be understood very very minutely. The spontaneity can be of two types: it can be only of impulsiveness, but then it is not very unique; if it is of awareness, then it has that quality of being unique - the Buddha quality.
Many times, listening to me, you think you are becoming spontaneous while you are simply becoming impulsive. What is the difference between being impulsive and being spontaneous? You have two things in you: the body and the mind. The mind is controlled by the society and the body is controlled by your biology. The mind is controlled by your society because the society can put thoughts into your mind; and your body is controlled by millions of years of biological growth.
The body is unconscious, so is mind unconscious. You are a watcher beyond both. So if you stop listening to the mind and to the society, there is every possibility you will start listening to the biology. Sosometimesyoufeellikemurderingsomebody,andyousay,”Iamgoingtobespontaneous-Osho has said'Be spontaneous!' so I have to do it. I have to be spontaneous.” You have misunderstood. That is not going to make your life beautiful, blissful. You will be continuously in conflict again - now with outside people.
By'spontaneity' Tantra means a spontaneity full of awareness. So the first thing in order to be spontaneous is to be fully aware. The moment you are aware, you are neither in the trap of the mind nor in the trap of the body. Then real spontaneity flows from your very soul - from the sky, from the sea, your spontaneity flows. Otherwise, you can change your masters: from the body you can change to the mind, or from the mind you can change to the body.
The body is fast asleep; following the body will be following a blind man. And the spontaneity will just take you into a ditch. It is not going to help you. Impulsiveness is not spontaneity. Yes, impulse HAS a certain spontaneity, more spontaneity than the mind, but it has not that quality which Tantra would like you to imbibe.
That's why Saraha says: SO FROM SPONTANEITY THAT'S UNIQUE... He adds the
word'unique'.'Unique' means not of impulsion but of awareness, of consciousness.
We live unconsciously. Whether we live in the mind or in the body does not make much difference - we live unconsciously.
”Why did you tear out the back part of that new book?” asked the long-suffering wife of an absent¬minded doctor.
”Excuse me, dear,” said the famous surgeon, ”the part you speak of was labelled APPENDIX and I took it out without thinking.”
His whole life taking the appendix out of everybody's body must have become an unconscioushabit. Seeing APPENDIX he automatically took it out.
That's how we are existing and working. It is an unconscious life. An unconscious spontaneity is not much of a spontaneity.
A drunk staggered from a tavern and started walking with one foot in the street and one on the sidewalk. After a block or two, a policeman spotted him. ”Hey,” said the cop, ”you're drunk!”
The drunk sighed with relief. ”Gosh!” he said. ”Is that what's wrong? I thought I was lame.”
When you are under the influence of the body, you are under the influence of chemistry. Again... you are out of one trap but you are again in another trap. From oneditch youareout;youhavefallen in another ditch.
When you REALLY want to be out of all ditches and in freedom, you will have to become a witness ofbody and mind both. When youare witnessing,and youare spontaneous out of your witnessing, then there is unique spontaneity.
SO FROM SPONTANEITY THAT'S UNIQUE,
REPLETE WITH THE BUDDHA'S PERFECTIONS...
And Saraha says: The real spontaneity is replete with Buddha's perfections. What are Buddha's perfections? Two: PRAGYAN and KARUNA - wisdom and compassion. These are Buddha's two perfections. Ifthese two are there, reflecting in your spontaneity,then itis unique.
Wisdom does not mean knowledge. Wisdom means awareness, meditativeness, silence, watchfulness, attentiveness. And out of that attentiveness, out of that silence, flows compassion for beings.
The whole world is suffering. The day you start enjoying your bliss you will start feeling for others too. They can also enjoy; they are just standing at the door of the shrine and are not entering in, and are rushing outwards. They have the treasure, the same treasure that you have attained; they are carrying it, but they are not using it because they are not aware of it.
When one person becomes Enlightened, his whole being becomes full of compassion - towards ALL beings. The whole existence is filled by his compassion. Rivers of compassion start flowing from him and start reaching to everybody else - to men, to women, to animals, to birds, to trees, to rivers, to mountains, to stars. The whole existence starts sharing his compassion.
These two are the qualities of Buddha, that he understands and that he feels and cares.
When your spontaneity is REALLY of awareness, you cannot do anything against compassion: you cannot murder. Peoplecometomeand theyask,”Osho,yousaytobespontaneous,butsometimes I want to murder my wife - then what?” You cannot murder. How can you murder?! Yes, not even your wife - you cannot murder.
When your spontaneity is alert, when it is luminous, how can you even THINK of murder? You will know that there is no possibility; nobody is ever murdered. The being is the sky: you can only disperse the cloud, but you cannot murder. So what is the point? And how can you murder if you are so alert and so spontaneous? Compassion will flow side by side, in the same proportion. As you become aware, in the same proportion there is compassion.
Buddha has said: If there is compassion without awareness, it is dangerous. That's what is in the people we call do-gooders. They have compassion, but no awareness. They go on doing good, and that good has not even happened to their own beings. They go on helping others, and they themselves need much help. They themselves are ill,and they go on helping other people. Itis not possible. PHYSICIAN, HEAL THYSELF FIRST!
Buddha says: If you have compassion without awareness, your compassion will be harmful. Do- gooders are the most mischievous people in the world. They don't know what they are doing, but they are always doing something or other to help people.
Once a man came to me... he has devoted his whole life, forty, fifty years - he is seventy. When he was twenty, he came under the influence of Mahatma Gandhi and become a do-gooder. Gandhi created the greatest lot of do-gooders in India; India is still suffering from those do-gooders. And it seems difficult to get rid of them. This man, under Mahatma Gandhi's influence, went to a primitive tribe in Bastar and started teaching the primitive people - forty years' effort, fifty years' effort. He opened many schools, high schools, and now he was opening a college.
He came to me. He wanted my support for the college. I said, ”Just tell me one thing: fifty years you havebeen with them -can you saycertainlythateducation hasbeen good, that they are better than they were when they were uneducated? Can you be certain that your fifty years' work has made them more beautiful human beings?”
He was a little puzzled. He started perspiring; he said, ”I never thought THAT way, but maybe you have something. No, they are not better. In fact, with education, they have become cunning, they have become just as other people are. When I reached them fifty years ago, they were tremendously beautiful people. Yes, uneducated - but they had a dignity. Fifty years ago there was not a single murder. And if sometimes it used to happen, then the murderer would go to the court and report. There was no stealing; and ifsometimessomebodydid steal, hewould cometothechiefofthetribe and confess that'I have stolen because I was hungry - but punish me.' There were no locks fifty years ago in those villages. They had always lived in a very silent peaceful way.”
So I asked him, ”If your education has not helped them, then thinkagain. You started doing good to others without knowing what you were doing. You just thought education has to be good.
”D. H. Lawrence has said that if man has to be saved, then for one hundred years all universities should be closed - completely closed! For one hundred years nobody should be given any education. For one hundred years, all schools, colleges, universities, gone - a gap of one hundred years. And that is the only way to save man, because education has made people very cunning - cunning to exploit more, cunning to use others more as means, cunning to be immoral.
”If you don't know what you are doing, you can think that you are doing good, but good cannot happen.”
Buddha says: Compassion is good when it follows awareness, otherwise it is not good. Compassion without awareness is dangerous, and awareness without compassion is selfish. So Buddha says: A perfect Buddha will have both - awareness and compassion. If you become aware and you forget about others and you say, ”Why should I bother? Now I am happy,” you close your eyes, you don't help others, you don't help others to become aware - then you are selfish, then a deep ego still exists.
Awareness kills half the ego, and the other half is killed by compassion. Between these two, the ego is utterly destroyed. And when a man has become a no-self, he has become a Buddha.
Saraha says:
SO FROM SPONTANEITY THAT'S UNIQUE,
REPLETE WITH THE BUDDHA'S PERFECTIONS,
ARE ALL SENTIENT BEINGS BORN, AND IN IT COME
TO REST. BUT IT IS NEITHER CONCRETE NOR ABSTRACT.
He says: From such unique spontaneity we are born. Out of such godliness we are born. And again we go back to this godliness to rest.
In the meantime, in the middle of these two, we become too much attached to the clouds. So ALL that is needed is not to be attached to the clouds. That is the whole of Tantra in one word: not to be attached to the clouds - because clouds are there only for the moment. We come out of that source, that innocent source, and we will go back to rest in that innocent source. In the middle of these two there will be many clouds - don't get attached to them. Just watch. Remember that you are not the clouds.
... ARE ALL SENTIENT BEINGS BORN, AND IN IT COME
TO REST.
We are out of God. We are gods. And again we go to God. In the meantime we start dreaming a thousand and one dreams -ofbeingthis and that.
God is the most ordinary reality. God isyoursource. God isyourgoal. GOD IS RIGHT NOW HERE! In your very presence God is - it is God's presence. When you look at me, it is God looking at me; it is nobody else. A shift, a change of the focus, from the cloud to the sky, and suddenly you will fall silent, and suddenly you will feel full of bliss, and suddenly you will feel benediction surrounding you.
BUT IT IS NEITHER CONCRETE NOR ABSTRACT.
It is neither mind nor body - this godliness. Mind is abstract, body is concrete; body is gross, mind is subtle. Body is matter, mind is thought. This inner godliness is neither. This inner godliness is a transcendence.
Tantra is transcendence.
So if you think you are a body, you are clouded; then you are identified with a cloud. If you think you are a mind, again you are clouded. If you think in any way that makes you identified with body or mind, then you are missing the mark.
If you become awake, and suddenly you see yourself only as a witness who sees the body, sees the mind, you have become a Saraha - the arrow is shot. In that change of consciousness - it is just a small change of gear - the arrow is shot, you have arrived. In fact, you had never left.
The third sutra:
THEY WALK OTHER PATHS AND SO FORSAKE TRUE BLISS,
SEEKING THE DELIGHTS THAT STIMULANTS PRODUCE.
THE HONEY IN THEIR MOUTHS, AND TO THEM SO NEAR,
WILL VANISH IF AT ONCE THEY DO NOT DRINK IT.
IF YOU ARE NOT BECOMING ONE WITH THE SKY with which you are really one, then you are walking other paths. There are millions of other paths - THE TRUE PATH IS ONE. And in fact the true path is not a path. The sky never goes anywhere - clouds go... sometimes west and sometimes east and south and this way and that, and they are great wanderers. They go, they find paths, they carry maps - but the sky is simply there. It has no path, it cannot go anywhere. It has nowhere to go.Itisallinall.
So those who remember their sky-being, they are athome, atrest. Except forthese fewbeings, few Buddhas, the others walk so many paths AND SO FORSAKE TRUE BLISS.
Trytounderstandthis. Itisaveryprofoundstatement.
Themomentyouarewalkingonanypath,youaregoingastrayfromyourtruebliss-becauseyour trueblissisyournature. It has not to be produced, it has not to be achieved, it has not to be attained.
Wefollowpathstoreachsomewhere-itisnotagoal. Itisalreadythere!Itisalreadythecase. So themomentyoustartmoving,youaremovingaway. ALLmovementismovementaway. ALLgoing is going astray. Non-going is arriving. Not going is the true path. Seek and you will miss: don't seek AND find.
THEYWALKOTHERPATHSANDSOFORSAKETRUEBLISS,
SEEKINGTHEDELIGHTSTHATSTIMULANTSPRODUCE.
There are two types of bliss. One is: conditional - it happens only in certain conditions. You see your woman, you are happy. Or, you are a lover of money and you have found a bag full of hundred rupee notes by the side of the road - and there is happiness. Or, you are an egoist and a Nobel Prize is awarded to you - and you dance, there is happiness. These are conditional, you have to arrange for them. And they are momentary.
How long can you be happy with a conditional happiness? How long can the happiness remain? It comes only like a glimpse, for a moment, and then it is gone. Yes, when you find a bag full of hundred rupee notes you are happy, but how long will you be happy? Not too long. In fact, for a moment there will be a surge of energy and you will feel happy and the next moment you will become afraid - are you going to be caught? Whose money is this? Has somebody seen? And the consciencewillsay,”Thisisnotright.Itisasortofstealing. Youshouldgotothecourt!Youshould go to the police - you should surrender the money to the police! What are you doing? You are a moral man...” and anxiety and guilt. But you have brought it home; now you are hiding it. Now you are afraid: maybe the wife will discover it; maybe somebody has really seen; somebody may have looked - who knows? Somebody may have reported to the police. Now the anxiety.
AND even if nobody has reported and nobody has seen, what are you going to do with this money? Whatsoever you are going to do will again and again give you a moment of happiness. You purchase a car, and the car is in your porch, and for a moment you are happy. Then...? Then the car is old; next day it is the same car. After a few days you don't look at it at all.
A momentary happiness comes and goes. It is like the cloud. And it is like the river - a very tiny river - a small rain and it is flooded; rain stopped and the flood is gone to the sea; again the tiny riveristiny. Itfloodsforonemomentandthenisemptythenext. Itisnotliketheseawhichisnever more, never less.
There is another kind of bliss that Saraha calls the true bliss. It is unconditional. You are not to managecertainconditions.ItisTHERE!Youhavejusttolookintoyourselfanditisthere.Youdon't need a woman, you don't need a man; you don't need a big house, you don't need a big car; you don't need to have much prestige and power and pull - nothing. Ifyoucloseyoureyesandjustgo inwards, it is there
Only this bliss can be always and always. Only this bliss can be eternally yours.
Seeking, you will find momentary things. Without seeking, you will find this eternal one.
THEY WALK OTHER PATHS AND SO FORSAKE TRUE BLISS,
SEEKING THE DELIGHTS THAT STIMULANTS PRODUCE.
THE HONEY IN THEIR MOUTHS, ANDTO THEM SO NEAR,
WILLVANISHIF AT ONCE THEY DO NOT DRINK IT.
The honey is in your mouth - and you are going to seek it in the Himalayas, in some mountains? You have heard stories: There is much honey available in the Himalayas - and you are going to seek it. And the honey is in your mouth!
In India the mystics have always talked about the musk deer. There is a certain kind of deer which has musk in his navel. When the musk starts increasing - it happens only when the deer is really in sexual heat The musk is a natural trick, a biological trick: when the musk starts releasing its
fragrance, the female deer become attracted to the deer; they come through the musk, through the smell.
Smellisoneofthemostsexualsenses-that'swhymanhaskilledhisnose. Itisadangeroussense. Youdon'tsmellreally. Infact,theworditselfhasbecomeverymuchcondemned. Ifsomebodyhas good, beautiful eyes, you say he sees well; if somebody has perfect ears for music, you say he hears wellbutyoudon'tsayhesmellswell. Why? In fact, to say that he smells means something just the opposite - it means that he stinks, not that he has the capacity to smell. The capacity is lost.
Man does not smell. And we try to hide our sexual smells by perfuming, by cleansing, by this and that we hide! We are afraid of the smell, because smell is the closest sense to sex. Animals fall in lovethroughthesmell.Theanimalssmelleachother,andwhentheyfeelthattheirsmellsuits,only then do they make love; then there is a harmony in their being.
This deer-musk is born in the deer only when he is in sexual heat and he needs a female. The female will come to find him. But he is in trouble, because he starts smelling the musk and he cannot understand that it is coming from his own navel, from his own body. So he runs mad, tries to find out from where this smell is coming, naturally so. How can he think? - even man cannot think from where bliss comes, from where beauty comes, from where joy comes. The deer can be forgiven - poor deer. He goes on rushing here and there in search of the musk, and the more he rushes, the more the fragrance is spread all over the forest; wherever he goes, there is the smell. It is said that sometimes he becomes almost mad, not knowing that the musk is within him.
And so is the case with man: man goes mad seeking and searching - sometimes in money, sometimesin respect, this and that,but the musk is within you,thehoneyisin yourmouth. And look at what Saraha is saying:
THEHONEYIN THEIR MOUTHS, AND TO THEM SO NEAR,
WILL VANISH IF AT ONCE THEY DO NOT DRINK IT.
And then he says: At once drink it! Don't lose a single moment! otherwise it will vanish. Now or never! Atonce-time hasnottobelost. Thiscan be done IMMEDIATELY, because there isnoneed for any preparation. Itisyourinnermostcore,thishoneyisyours-thismuskishidden in yournavel. You have brought it from your birth, and you have been searching and seeking in the world.
The fourth sutra:
BEASTS DONOT UNDERSTANDTHEWORLD
TOBE A SORRY PLACE. NOTSO THE WISE
WHO THE HEAVENLY NECTARDRINK
WHILE BEASTSHUNGER FOR THESENSUAL.
THE WORD'BEAST' is a translation of a Hindi or Sanskrit word PASHU. Thatwordhasasignificance of its own. Literally, PASHU means the animal, the beast, but it is a metaphor. It comes from the word PASH - PASH means bondage. PASHUmeansone who is in bondage.
The beast is one who is in bondage - the bondage of the body, instincts, unconsciousness; the bondage of the society, mind, thought. The beast is one who is in bondage.
BEASTS DONOT UNDERSTANDTHEWORLD...
How can they understand? Their eyes are not free to see; their minds are not free to see; their bodies are not free to feel. They don't hear, they don't see, they don't smell, they don't touch - they are in bondage. All senses are crippled, chained.
BEASTS DONOT UNDERSTANDTHEWORLD...
How can they understand the world? The world can be understood only in freedom. When no scripture is a bondage on you, and no philosophy is a chain in your hands, and when no theology is a prison for you, when you are out of ALL bondages, then you can understand. Understanding happens only in freedom. Understanding happens only in an uncluttered mind.
BEASTSDONOTUNDERSTANDTHEWORLD
TOBE A SORRY PLACE.
And they cannot understand that the world is a sorry place. The so-called world created by the mind and by the bodyis amirage. ItAPPEARSso, itappearsverybeautiful, butitonlyappears -itisnot really so. It is a rainbow - so beautiful, so colorful; you come closer and it disappears. If you want to grasp the rainbow, your hand will be empty, there will be nothing. It is a mirage. But because of unconsciousness we cannot see it.
Only with awareness does the vision arise; then we can see where it is only a mirage and where it is truth. Any happiness that happens by any outer coincidence is a mirage, and you will suffer through it. It is a deception, it is a hallucination.
You feel that you are very happy with a woman or with a man? - you are going to suffer. Sooner or later you will find that all happiness has disappeared. Sooner or later you will find maybe you were justimagining it-ithasneverbeen there. Maybe itwasjustadream. You were fantasizing it. When the reality of the woman and the man is revealed, you find two ugly beasts trying to dominate each other.
I have heard:
The best man was doing his utmost to make the groom brace up. ”Where is your nerve, old man?” he asked. ”You are shaking like a leaf!”
”I know I am,” said the groom, ”but this is a nerve-wracking time for me. I've got some excuse for being frightened, haven't I? I've never been married before.”
”Of course you haven't,” said the best man. ”If you had you would be much more scared than you are!”
As you look into life, as you watch life, as you learn more about it, by and by you will feel disillusioned. There is nothing... just mirages calling you. Many times you have been befooled. Many times you rushed, you travelled long, to find just nothing.
Ifyou are alert, yourexperience will makeyou free ofthe world. And by'the world'Idon'tmean, and neither does Saraha mean, the world of the trees and the stars and the rivers and the mountains by'theworld'hemeanstheworldthatyouprojectthroughyourmind, through your desire. Thatworld is maya, that world is illusory, that is created by desire, that is created by thought. When thought and desire disappear and there is just awareness, alertness, when there is consciousness without any content, when there is no thought-cloud, just consciousness, the sky, then you see the real world. That real world is what religions call God, or Buddha calls Nirvana.
BEASTS DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE WORLD
TO BE A SORRY PLACE. NOT SO THE WISE
WHO THE HEAVENLY NECTAR DRINK
WHILE BEASTS HUNGER FOR THE SENSUAL.
But when you are defeated in your hope, when you are defeated in your dream, you think maybe THIS dream was wrong, and you start dreaming another dream. When you are not fulfilled in your desire, you think you didn't make as much effort as was needed. Again you are deceived.
A woman sitting on a streetcar noticed that the man next to her kept shaking his head from side to side, like a metronome. The woman's curiosity got the best of her and she asked why he was doing it.
”So Ican tell the time,” replied the fellow.
”Well, what time is it?” asked the woman.
”Four-thirty,” he said, still shaking his head.
”You're wrong - it's a quarter until five.”
”Oh! Then I must be slow!” the man answered as he speeded up.
That's how it goes on: if you don't achieve something, you think maybe you have not been making as much effort as was needed, or your speed was slow, your competitive spirit was not enough to compete with others. You were not aggressive enough. You were not violent enough; that you were lethargic and lazy; that next time you have to pull yourself up; that you have to pull yourself together - next time you have to prove your mettle.
It has nothing to do with your mettle. You have failed because success is not possible. You have not failed for reason of your effort, speed, aggression - no. You have not failed because you were defective. You have failed because failure is the only possibility in the world - nobody succeeds. Nobody can succeed! Success is not possible. Desires cannot be fulfilled. And projections never allow you to see the reality, and you remain in bondage.
You also experience the same failure again and again as I have experienced. You also experience the same failure again and again as Buddha or Saraha has experienced. Then what is the difference? You experience the failure, but you don't learn anything from it. That is the only difference. The moment you start learning from it, you will be a Buddha.
One experience, another experience, another experience, but you don't put all the experiences together - you don't conclude! You say, ”This woman proved horrible, okay - but there are millions of women. I will find another.” This woman proves a failure again, you again start hoping, dreaming you will find another: ”It does not mean that all women have failed if one woman has failed. It does not mean that one man has failed so all men have failed.” You go on hoping, you go on hoping - the hope goes on winning over your experience, and you never learn.
One relationship becomes a bondage; you feel that something has gone wrong - next time you will make all the efforts not to make it a bondage. But you are not going to succeed - because success is not in the very nature of things here. Failure is the only possibility: success is impossible.
The day you recognize that failure is the only possibility, that ALL rainbows are false, and all happinessesthatglitterandshinefromfarawayandattractyoulikemagnets,arejustemptydreams, desires, you are deluding yourself - the day you recognize the fact, a turning, a conversion, a new being is born.
With a banging of doors and an angry swish of skirts, the hefty female entered the registrar's office.
”Did you or did you not issue this license for me to marry John Henry?” she snapped, slamming a document on the table.
The registrar inspected it closely through his glasses. ”Yes, madam,” he said cautiously, ”I believe I did. Why?”
”Well, what are you going to do about it?” she screamed. ”He's escaped!”
All relationships are just beautiful on the surface; deep down they are a sort of bondage. I am not saying don't relate to people; I am saying relate, but never think that any relationship is going to give you happiness. Relate! Of course, you will have to relate - you are in the world. You have to relate to people, but no relationship is going to give you happiness - because it never comes from the outside. Italways glows from the inside,italways flows from the inside.
And Saraha says: The man who believes that it comes from the outside is a beast - he is a PASHU
- he is in bondage. And the man who recognizes the fact that it never comes from the outside, whenever it comes it comes from the inside, is free. He is a man; he is really a man, he is no more a beast. With that freedom man is born.
BEASTS DONOTUNDERSTAND THE WORLD
TOBE A SORRY PLACE. NOTSO THE WISE
WHO THE HEAVENLY NECTAR DRINK...
Whatis thisheavenly nectar? Itissymbolic ofthe honeythatyouhave already in your mouth -and youhavenottasted it. Youdon'thaveany time to taste it. The whole world istoo much,and youare rushing from one place to another. You don't have any time to taste the honey that is already there.
Thatis the heavenly nectar -if you taste it,youare in heaven. Ifyoutaste it,then there is no death
- that's why it is called'heavenly nectar': you become an immortal. You are an immortal. You have notseen it,butyouAREan immortal. There is no death: youare deathless. The SKYis deathless: only clouds are born and die. Rivers are born and die: the sea is deathless. So are you.
SARAHAsaysthesesutrastotheking. Saraha is not trying to convince him logically. Infact,heis simply making his being available to him. And he is giving him a new gestalt - to look at Saraha. Tantra is a new gestalt to look at life. And I have never come across anything more profound than Tantra.
CHAPTER 4
Love is death
24 April 1977 am in Buddha Hall
The first question:
Question 1
OSHO, YOU ARE EVERYTHING THAT I HAVE EVER WANTED OR COULD EVER WANT. SO WHY IS THERE SO MUCH RESISTANCE IN ME TOWARDS YOU?
THAT'S WHY - if you have deep love for me, there will be deep resistance also. They balance each other. Wherever love is, there is resistance too. Wherever you are tremendously attracted, you would like to escape also from that place, from that space - because to be immensely attracted means you will fall into the abyss, you will no more be yourself.
Love is dangerous. Love is a death. It is more deathly than death itself-because you survive after death, but after love you don't survive. Yes, somebody else is born, but you are gone. Hence the fear.
Those who are not in love with me, they can come very close, and there will be no fear. Those who love me, they will be afraid of taking each step; reluctantly they will take those steps; very hard it is going to be for them - because the closer they come to me, the less will be their ego. That's what I mean by death. The momentthey have come REALLYclose to me, they are not-justas I am not.
Coming closer to me is coming closer to a state of nothingness. So even in ordinary love there is resistance - this love is extraordinary, this love is unique
The question is from Anand Anupam. I have been watching her. She IS resisting. The question is notjustintellectual,itisexistential. Shehasbeenfightinghard... but she cannot win. Sheisblessed because she cannot win. Her defeat is certain, it is absolutely certain. I have seen that love in her eyes; that love is so strong that it will destroy all resistance, that it will win over all efforts of the ego to survive.
When love is strong, the ego can try but it is already a losing battle for the ego. That's why so many people live without love. They talk about love, but they live without love. They fantasize about love, but they never actualize love - because to actualize love means you will have to destroy yourself utterly.
WhenyoucometoaMaster,itiseitherutterdestructionornothing.Eitheryouhavetodissolveinto me and you have to allow me to dissolve into you, or you can be here but nothing will happen. If the ego remains, then there is a China Wall between me and you. And a China Wall can be broken easily, but the ego is a more subtle energy.
But once love has arisen, then the ego is impotent - and I have seen this love in Anupam's eyes. It is there. It is going to be a great struggle, but good! - because those who come very easily don't come. Those who take a long time,thosewhofightinch byinch,onlytheycome.
But nothing to be worried about. The journey is going to be a long journey. Anupam will take time, maybe years, but nothing to be worried! She is on the right track. AND she has crossed the point from where she could have gone back; she has crossed the point of no-return. So it is only a question of time.
She is available to me. I never force anybody - because there is no need. And it is good to give them time and enough rope, so they come on their own. When surrender is out of freedom it has a beauty.
But you can trust it is coming, it is on the way. In the deepest core of your being it has already happened; now it is just a question of time, so that the deepest core informs your superficial mind. In your heart you have already come to me. Only in the mind is there struggle. At the center you have already come closer to me; only on the periphery there is fighting going on. The headquarters have really already surrendered.
You must have heard about a Japanese soldier who was still fighting: the Second World War was over, so many years had passed, and twenty years after the Second World War he was still fighting
- he had not heard that Japan had surrendered. He was somewhere in the deepest forests of Indonesia,andstillthinkingthathebelongedtotheemperorofJapanandthefightwason. Hemust have been mad! He was hiding and escaping and killing people - alone!
When just a few years ago he went back to Japan, he was given a hero's reception. He is a hero in away.Hewasunaware-buthemustbeamanofgreatwill. He had heard from others - it was not that he had not heard; how can you avoid for twenty years? that Japan had surrendered, the war had finished. But he insisted: ”Unless I receive an order from my commander, I will not surrender.” Now,thecommanderwasdead,sotherewasnowaytoreceiveanorderfromthecommander-and hewasgoingtofighthiswholelife.Itwasverydifficulttocatchholdofhim;hewasverydangerous
- but he was caught.
Exactly that is the case with Anupam: the headquarters have already surrendered, the commander is dead! Just on the periphery, somewhere in the forests of Indonesia you are fighting, Anupam. But sooner or later, howsoever mad you are, you will receive the news
The second question:
Question 2
I WOULD LIKE TO BECOME TRUE, BUT WHAT IS IT AND HOW IS IT? I FEEL IN A DEVIL¬CIRCLE, INAPRISON. I WOULD LIKE TO COME OUT, BUT HOW?
THE FIRST THING: you are not in a prison - nobody is, nobody ever has been. The prison is make-believe. You are unconscious, certainly, but you are not in a prison. The prison is a dream, a nightmare, that you have managed to see in your sleep. So the basic question is not how to come out of the prison; the basic question is how to come out of the sleep. And there is a great difference in how you articulate the question. If you start thinking, ”How to come out of the prison?” then you will startfighting with the prison -WHICHISNOT-then you will be moving in awrong direction.
That's what many people have been doing down the centuries. They think they are in a prison, so they fight with the prison, they fight with the guards. they fight with the jailor, they fight with the system. They fight with the walls! They go on filing the bars of the windows; they want to escape from the prison, they try to unlock the prison but it cannot be done, because the prison exists not. The jailor and the guard and the bars and the locks are all imagination.
You are in a deep sleep and you are seeing a nightmare. The basic question is how to come out of sleep.
I have heard:
No durance vile could be more pathetic than that suffered by the drunk who was found wandering agonizedly around and around on the sidewalk outside the fence which encloses a public park, beating upon the bars and screaming: ”Let me out!”
That is your situation. You are not locked up, you are not imprisoned you are simply drunk. You THINK that you are imprisoned. This is just a thought. And I know why that thought arises in your mind: because you feel yourself so very limited from everywhere - out of the limitation the idea of prison arises. Wherever you move there is a limitation; you can go only so far and then you cannot go any further; then there must be a wall which is hindering you. So you infer that there is a wall all around; maybe not visible, maybe it is a glass wall made of very transparent glass; you can see through it, but whenever you move in ANY direction, again and again you stumble and you cannot go beyond a certain point.
This gives you the idea of a prison, that you are imprisoned. But this limitation is also because of sleep. In sleep you become identified with the body, so the limitations of the body become your limitations. In sleepyou become identified with the mind, so the limitationsofthe mind becomeyour limitations.
YOU ARE UNLIMITED. You are unbounded. AS you are in your pure being, no limitation exists - you are a god. But to KNOW that godhood, don't start fighting with the prison, otherwise you will never be a winner. And more and more you will be defeated, and more and more you will feel frustrated, and more and more you will lose self-confidence, more and more you will feel that it seems impossible to get out of it.
Start by becoming more aware. Start by becoming more alert, more attentive. That is the only thing that has to be done.
Being aware you will start feeling that the walls that were too close are no more so close; they are widening. Your prison is becoming bigger and bigger. The more your consciousness expands, the more you will see that your prison is no more THAT small - it is becoming bigger and bigger. More expansive consciousness and bigger space is available to you to move, to be, to live, to love. And then you know the basic mechanism: less conscious, and the walls come closer; unconscious, and the walls are just touching you from everywhere. You are in a small cell; even a slight movement is not possible.
Remember this phrase: expansion of consciousness. With that expansion, YOU expand. One day, when your consciousness is absolute and there is not a lingering shadow of darkness inside, when there is nothing unconscious in you, all has become conscious, when the light is burning bright, when you are luminous from the inner awareness - then suddenly you see that even the sky is not your limit, there is no limitation to you.
This is the whole experience of the mystics of all the ages. When Jesus says: ”I and my father in heaven areone,”thisiswhathemeans. Heissaying: ”Ihavenolimitations.”Itisawayofsaying the same thing, a metaphorical way, a symbolic way: ”I and my Father in heaven are not two but one - I,staying in this small body and He, spread all over existence,are nottwo butone. My source and I are one... IAMas big as existence itself.”
That is the meaning when the mystic of the Upanishad declares: ”Aham Brahmasmi - I am the Absolute, I am God. ” This is uttered in a state of awareness where no unconsciousness exists.
This is the meaning when the Sufi, Mansoor, declares, ”Ana-el-Haqq - I am the Truth.”
These great utterances are very significant. They simply say that you are as big as your consciousness never more, never less. That's why there is so much appeal in drugs, because they chemically force your consciousness to become a little wider than it is. LSD or marijuana or mescalin, they give you a sudden expansion of consciousness. Of course, it is forced and violent and should NOT be done. And it is chemical - it has nothing to do with your spirituality. YOU DON'T GROW THROUGH IT! Growth comes through voluntary effort. Growth is not cheap, not so cheap that just a small quantity of LSD, a VERY small quantity of LSD, can give you spiritual growth.
Aldous Huxley was very much wrong when he started thinking that he had attained through LSD the same experience as Kabir, or as Eckhardt, or as Baso - no, it is not the same experience. Yes, something issimilar;thatsimilarityisin theexpansion ofconsciousness. Butitisverydissimilartoo; it is a forced thing; it is a violence on your biology and on your chemistry. And you remain the same! You don't grow through it. Once the influence of the drug wears off, you are the same man again, the same small man.
Kabir will never be the same again because that expansion of consciousness was not just a forced thing - he has grown to it. Now there is no going back. It has become part of him. It has become his being. He has absorbed it.
But the appeal can be understood. The appeal has always been there; it has nothing to do with the moderngeneration. It has always been there... sincetheVedas;manhasalwaysfelttremendously attracted towards drugs. It is a false coin; it gives you a little glimpse of the real in a very unnatural way. Butmanisalwaysseekingexpansion;manwantstobecomegreat.
Sometimes through money he wants to become great - yes, money also gives you a feeling of expansion; it is a drug. When you have much money, you feel your boundaries are not so close to you - they are far away. You can have as many cars as you want; you are not limited. If suddenly you want to have a Rolls Royce, you can have it - you feel free. When the money is not there, a Rolls Royce passes by, the desire arises... but the limitation. Your pocket is empty. You don't have any bank balance. You feel hurt - the wall; you cannot go beyond it. The car is there; you see the car; you can have it right now - but there is a wall between you and the car: the wall of poverty.
Money gives you a feeling of expansion, a feeling of freedom. But that too is a false freedom. You can have many more things, but that doesn't help you grow. You don't become more - you have more, but your being remains the same. So is power: if you are a prime minister or a president of a country you feel powerful - the army, the police, the court, the whole paraphernalia of the state is yours. The boundaries of the country are your boundaries: you feel tremendously powerful. But that too is a drug.
Let me say to you: Politics and money are as much drugs as LSD and marijuana - and far more dangerous. If one has to choose between LSD and money, LSD is far better. Ifonehastochoose between politics and LSD, then LSD is far better and far more religious. Why do I say so? because through LSD you will only be destroying yourself, but through money you destroy others too. Through LSD you will be simply destroying your chemistry, your biology, but through politics you will destroy millions of people.
Just think: if Adolf Hitler had been a drug addict, the world would have been far better; if he had been on LSD, or with a syringe in hand, we would have felt blessed, we would have thanked God ”It is very good that he remains in his house and goes on taking shots and is stoned. The world can go on easily without him.”
Money, politics, are far more dangerous drugs. Now, this is very ironical: politicians are always againstdrugs,peoplewhohavemoneyarealwaysagainstdrugs-andtheyarenotawarethatthey themselves are drug-addicts. And they are on a far more dangerous trip, because their trip implies others' lives too. A man is free to do whatsoever he wants to do. LSD can at the most be a suicidal thing, but it is never murder. It is suicide! And one IS free to commit suicide, at least one HAS to be free to commit suicide because it is your life; if you don't want to live, it is okay. But money is murder; so is power-politics murder - it kills others.
I am not saying to choose drugs. I am saying ALL drugs are bad: money, politics, LSD, marijuana. You choose these things because you have a false idea that they will expand your consciousness. The consciousness can be expanded very simply, very easily, because IN FACT it is already expanded. You are just living in a false notion: your false notion is your barrier, is your prison.
You ask: ”I would like to become true...”
YOU CANNOT LIKE OR DISLIKE. It is not a question of your choice. Truth is! Whether you like it or do not like it is irrelevant. You can choose lies, but you cannot choose truth - truth is there. That's why Krishnamurti insists so much on choiceless awareness. You cannot choose truth. Truth is already there! It has nothing to do with your choice, liking, disliking.
The moment you drop your choice, truth is there. It is because of your choice that you cannot see the truth. Your choice functions like a screen on your eyes. Your liking and disliking is the problem! Because you like something, you cannot see that which is; and because you dislike something you cannot see that which is. Through like and dislike you are having colored glasses on your eyes and you don't see the real color of existence as It is.
You say: ”I would like to become true...” That's how you remain untrue. YOU ARE TRUE! Drop likes and dislikes! How can you be untrue? Being is true. To be is true. You are here - alive, breathing. How can you be untrue? Your choice: by choice you have become a Christian or a Hindu or a Mohammedan. By truth you are not Hindu, Mohammedan, Christian. By choice you have become identified with India, with China, with Germany, but by truth the whole belongs to you and you belong to the whole you are universal.
The total lives through you. You are NOT just a part. The total lives through you AS totality. Choose, like, dislike, and you go astray.
Now you say, ”I would like to become true...” then in the name of truth also you will become untrue. That's how a person becomes a Christian, because he thinks Christianity is true and”I would like to become true,” so he becomes a Christian. Please don't become a Christian, don't become a Hindu. YOU ARE A CHRIST! WHY become a Christian? CHRISThood is your nature. Christhood has nothing to do with Jesus; it is as much yours as Jesus'. Christhood is a state of choiceless awareness.
So please don't start thinking in terms of desire: ”I would like to become true.” Now this is the way to become untrue. Drop this desire just be, don't try to become. Becoming is becoming untrue: being is truth. And see the difference!
Becoming is in the future; it has a goal. Being is herenow; it is not a goal - it is already the case. So whosoever you are, just be that; don't try to become anything else. You have been taught ideals, goals - become! Always you have been forced to become something.
My whole teaching is: Whatsoever, whosoever you are, that's beautiful. It is more than enough. You just be that. Stop becoming and be!
And now, naturally, when you ask ”I would like to become true, but what is it and how is it?” once you start thinking in terms of becoming, then certainly you want to know what the goal is: What is it? what is this truth that I want to become? And then naturally, when'goal' comes there,'how' also comes: How to attain it? Then the whole technology, methodology
I am saying you ARE That. The mystic in the Upanishad says: TAT-TAT-TVAM-ASI-ASI - thou art That. ALREADY you are That. It is not a question of becoming. God is not somewhere in the future;
God is just now, this very moment, within you, without you, everywhere - because only God is, nothing else exists. All that exists is divine.
So be! Don't try to become. Then one thing leads to another: If you want to become, then naturally the idea arises: What ideal? What am I to become? Then you have to imagine an ideal, that you have to be like this - Christ-like, Buddha-like, Krishna-like. Then you will have to choose an image, and you will become a carbon copy.
Krishna has never been repeated. Can't you see a simple truth? Krishna has never been again. Can't you see a VERY simple truth, that Buddha is unrepeatable? EACH being is unique, utterly unique - so are you. If you try to become somebody, you will be a false entity, a pseudo existence. You will be a carbon copy. Be the original! So, you can only be yourself. There is nowhere to go, nothing to become.
But the ego wants some goal. The ego exists between the present moment and the goal. See the mechanism of the ego. The bigger the goal you have, the bigger the ego. If you want to become a Christ, if you are a Christian then you have a big ego - maybe even pious, but it doesn't make any difference. The pious ego is as much an ego as any other ego; sometimes even more dangerous than ordinary egos.
If you are a Christian, then you are on an ego-trip. Ego means the distance between you and the goal. People cometome and theyask: ”How to dropthe ego?”You cannot drop the ego unlessyou drop becoming. You cannot drop the ego unless you drop the idea, the ideal, the hope, the future.
The ego exists between the present moment and the future ideal. The bigger the ideal, the farther away the ideal, the more space the ego has to exist, the more possibilities. That's why a religious person is more of an egoist than a materialist. The materialist cannot have THAT much space as the religious person has. The religious person wants to become God! Now, this is the greatest possibility. What more can you have as an ideal? The religious person wants to go to MOKSHA, to heaven, to paradise - now, what farther shore can you imagine? The religious person wants to be absolutely perfect. Now ego will exist in the shadow of this idea of perfection.
Listen to me! I don't say you have to become gods - I declare you are gods. Then there is no question of any ego arising, there is no space left. You are not to go to heaven - you are already there. Justhaveagood lookaround... you are already there! Itisanowness, paradise is a nowness. It is a function of the present moment.
The ego thrives when you have goals and ideals. And there are a thousand and one problems with the ego. On the one hand it feels very good to have great ideals; on the other hand it makes you feel guilty, continuously feel guilty, because you are always falling short. Those ideals are impossible; you cannot attain them. There is no way to attain them, so you are always falling short. So on one hand the ego thrives;on another hand guilt... guiltis the shadowofthe ego.
Have you watched this strange phenomenon? An egoistic person feelsvery much guilty aboutsmall things. You smoke a cigarette; if you are an egoist you will feel guilty. Now, smoking is an innocent, stupid thing - very innocent and very stupid. Nothing worth feeling guilty about, but a religious person will feel guilty because he has an ego-ideal that he should not smoke. Now that ideal that he should not smoke and the reality that he smokes create two things: the ideal gives him a good feeling that”I am areligiousperson. I KNOWthatI should notsmoke;I even try,I trymybest... ”but he will also feel that he again and again falls. He cannot reach to the ideal, so he feels guilty. And the person who feels guilty will startmaking everybody feel guilty. Itis natural: howcan you just feel guiltyalone? Itwill be too hard; it will be too burdensome.
So a guilty person creates guilt all around. He makes everybody feel guilty for small things, for irrelevant things. If you have long hair, he will make you feel guilty. There is nothing much in it; it is one's own life -if one wants to have long hair, good! If youare doing things in your own way he will make you feel guilty. Whatsoever you are doing he will find faults. He HAS to find faults - he is suffering from guilt. How can he suffer alone? When everybody is feeling guilty he feels at ease. At least one consolation that ”I am not alone in the boat - everybody is in the same boat.”
The trick to make others feel guilty is to give them ideals. This is a very subtle trick: the parents give an ideal to the child to ”Be like this.” They have never been like'this'; nobody has ever been. Now they give an ideal to the child - this is a very subtle and cunning way to make the child feel guilty. Now, again and again the child will feel ”I am notcoming closerto theideal;in fact,I am going farther away from it!”So ithurts;itkeeps him down, depressed.
Hence yousee so much misery in the world. Itis not actual: ninety percentis because ofthe ideals that have been imposed upon you. And they don't allow you to laugh, they don't allow you to enjoy. A man who has no ideals will never make anybody else feel guilty.
Justthe other night, a young man came and hesaid,”I feel very very guilty about my homosexuality. It is unnatural.” Now, if he had gone to Mahatma Gandhi, or to the Vatican Pope, or to Puri's Shankaracharya, what would have happened? They would have really made him feel guilty. And he is ready! to fall into the hands of any torturer. He is ready; he is himself inviting. He is calling the mahatmas to come and make him feel guilty. Alone he cannot do that job very well, so he is asking the experts.
Buthe has come to awrong person. I told him,”So what! Why do yousay itis unnatural?”
He said, ”It is not unnatural?” He was surprised and shocked. ”It is not unnatural?”
I said, ”How can it be unnatural? My definition of nature is: that which happens is natural. How can the unnatural happen in the first place?”
Immediately I could see he was coming out of the ditch; his face started smiling. So he said, ”It is not unnatural? Itis notaperversion? Itis notsome sortofabnormality?”
And I told him,”Itis not!”
”But,” he said, ”animals - they don't become homosexual.”
I said, ”They don't have that much intelligence! They live a fixed life. Whatsoever biology allows, they live that way. Youcan goand seeabuffaloeating grass-sheonlyeatsacertain grass, nothing else. You can put the CHOICEST food - she will not bother; she will go on eating her grass. She has no alternatives. Consciousness is very narrow, almost nil. Man has intelligence; he tries to find new ways to relate, to live. Man is the only animal who finds new ways. Now, to live in a house is unnatural, because no animal lives - so is it a perversion? Or to wear clothes is abnormal, because no animal wears clothes is it a perversion? To cook food is unnatural - no animal has ever done it! Is it wrong to eat cooked food? To invite people to your house for a drink or for lunch is unnatural because no animal ever invites any other animal - because animals in fact always go in privacy when they want to eat. You give something to a dog: he will immediately go into a corner and will keep everybody at the back, and will be in a hurry to eat. He will never invite, he will not call his friends:'Come on!' That is natural to a dog, but you are not dogs; you are far superior. You have more intelligence, you have more possibilities. Man makes everything in his own way - that is HIS nature.”
He was relieved. I could see a great burden, a mountain that was on his head, was gone. I am not certain how long he will remain free and unburdened. Some mahatma may catch hold of him, and again putthe same idea that ”this is unnatural”. Mahatmas are either sadists ormasochists -avoid! Whenever you see a mahatma, RUN as fast as you can before he puts some guilt in your mind.
WHATSOEVER YOU CAN BE, YOU ARE. There is no goal. And we are not going anywhere. We aresimplycelebratinghere. Existenceisnotajourney,itisacelebration. Thinkofitasacelebration! as a delight, as a joy! Don't turn it into a suffering! Don't turn it into a duty, a work - let it be play!
ThisiswhatImeanbybecomingreligious: noguilt,noego,notripofanykind-justbeingherenow... being with the trees and The birds and the rivers and the mountains and the stars.
You are not in a prison. You are in God's house, you are in God's temple - please don't call it a prison; it is not. You have misunderstood. You have interpreted it wrongly. Listening to me also you can interpret many things wrongly. You GO on interpreting.
Two scenes... one:
The nurseryman who spoke at the garden club meeting placed emphasis on the advantage to be gainedbytheuseofoldhorsemanureforfertilizingspringgardens. During the question and answer period, a city lady who had been taking notes raised her hand. The speaker nodded to her and she earnestly enquired: ”You said old horse manure was the best fertilizer. Would you mind telling me how old the horse should be?”
The second:
A hillbilly type woman brought her little boy to the county school. When questioned about her husband, she confided, ”I never knew much about this boy's father. He came through here, courted me and we got married. Soon afterwards I found out he was a hobosexual.”
”Youmeanhomosexual,”camethecorrection.
”No, sir, I mean hobosexual. He was just a no-good, passionate bum.”
Each one has his own interpretation of words. So when I am saying something, I don't know what you are going to understand out of it. Each one has a private dictionary hidden in the unconscious. That private dictionary goes on infiltrating, changing, coloring.
I have been telling you to become free. You have misunderstood me - you thought you are in a prison. Yes, I say ”Become free!” Immediately you interpret it as if you are in a prison. The whole emphasishaschanged. Myemphasiswason YOU:Befree! Youremphasishasgoneontheprison. Nowyou say, ”I am in aprison. UnlessI getoutofthe prison, howcan I be free?” My emphasis was: Be free, and if you are free there is no prison. The prison is created by your habit of being unfree.
Look! The emphasis has changed - and it seems that it almost means the same. When I say ”Be free!” what difference is there if somebody says ”Yes, I am in a prison”? - a LOT of difference, a great difference. The whole thing has changed. It is a totally different thing when you say ”I am in prison.”Then theguard and theprison -theybecomeresponsible. Then unlesstheyallowyou, how can you get out of it? You have thrown the responsibility on somebody else.
When I wassaying ”Befree!”I wassaying ”You areresponsible.”ItisYOURthing tobe free or not to befree. Ifyou havechosen NOTtobefree, then therewill beaprison, then therewill beguardsand the prisoner. If you have chosen to be free, the guards and the prison and everything disappears. Just drop the habit of being unfree.
How can you drop it? Freedom and consciousness go hand in hand: more conscious, more free; less conscious, less free. The animals are less free because.they are less conscious. The rock is even less free because the rock has no consciousness, almost nil. Man is the most highly evolved being, at least on this earth. Man has a little freedom then a Buddha has absolute freedom: his consciousness.
So it is only a question of the degrees of consciousness. Your prison consists of the layers of your unconsciousness. Start becoming conscious and there is no other prison.
And remember, the mind is very cunning. It can always find ways to befool you. It has learnt very many tricks to befool. The mind can just use another word, and you may not even see the difference - the difference may be so subtle that it is almost synonymous - and the mind has played a trick.
So when I am saying something, please don't interpret it. Just listen to it as attentively as possible; don't change a single word, not even a single comma. Just listen to what I am saying. Don't bring YOUR mind into it, otherwise you will hear something else. Always be alert about the cunningness of the mind. And you have cultivated that cunningness. You have not cultivated it for yourself, but you have cultivated it for others. We try to befool everybody; by and by, the mind becomes expert in befooling - then it starts befooling you.
I have heard:
A journalist died. Naturally, he was a journalist, and even in the president's house and the prime minister'shousehehadbeenimmediatelywelcomedandtakenin;noappointmentwaseverneeded -he wasagreatjournalist. So he rushed towardsheaven -why should he go to hell? -buthe was prevented by Saint Peter. And Saint Peter said, ”Wait! No more journalists are needed here. We already have the full quota; we only need one dozen - in fact, they are also useless because there is no newspaper being printed in heaven.”
In fact, there is no news! Nothing happens there ever. Things are going so smoothly, how can news happen? And what news can you think about saints' lives: they are sitting under their trees, Bodhi Trees, meditating. So the newspaper is not much of a newspaper, but just to have it published, just as a formality, the newspaper IS published, and every day it is written'ditto'... the same as before.
”We don't need any journalists - you go to hell. And there are always more and more journalists needed, because there is much news, and newspapers and newspapers... and new newspapers are being planned - I have just heard. You go there and you will have a great job and great joy!”
But the journalistwanted to be in heaven, so he said. ”You do one thing: I knowjournalists... if Ican manage to get some journalist to go to hell, will his place be given to me?”
Saint Peter took pity on him; he said, ”Okay, how much time do you need to convert a journalist to go to hell?”
He said, ”Twenty-four hours, just twenty-four hours.”
So he was allowed into heaven for twenty-four hours. He immediately started circulating a rumor that ”one of the greatest newspapers is being planned, and the chief editor is needed, the assistant editors are needed, the sub-editors are needed - and great is the possibility. But, you will have to go to hell.”
For twenty-four hours he went round and round. He met all the journalists, and after twenty-four hours when he went to Saint Peter to see whether anybody had left, Saint Peter simply closed the door and told him,”Don'tgo outside because they ALLhave left!”
But the journalist said, ”No, then I will have to go - maybe there is something in it. You please don't prevent me. I will HAVE to go.”
He himself has spread the rumor, but when twelve persons have believed then one starts believing it oneself.
That's how mind has become so cunning. You have been deceiving and deceiving... it has become such an expert in deception that it deceives you too.
The plaintiff in an accident-injury case, appearing in court in a wheelchair, won a huge settlement. Enraged, the lawyer for the defence advanced on the winner in his wheelchair.
”You're faking and I know you're faking,” he shouted. ”So help me God,I'm goingtofollowyouaround for the rest of your life, until I get proof.”
The lawyer knew it perfectly well, that that man was a fake, that wheelchair was a show. He was perfectly okay, there was nothing wrong in his body. So he said:
”So help me God, I'm going to follow you round for the rest of your life, until I get proof.”
”Be my guest,” responded the man in the wheelchair, with a smile. ”Let me tell you my plans. First, I'm going to London for some clothes, then to the Riviera for the sun, and after that - to Lourdes, for the miracle.”
Mind is so cunning; it can find a way out always. It can go to Lourdes But once you are playing
these tricks on others, sooner or later you will be the victim yourself. Beware of your own mind. Don't trust it, doubt it. If you start doubting your mind, that is a great moment. The moment the doubt about mind arises, you start trusting the self. If you trust the mind, you doubt the self; if you mistrust the mind, you start trusting the self.
That is the whole meaning of trusting a Master. When you come to me, it is simply a technique to help you to doubt your own mind. You start trusting me: you say, ”I will listen to you. I won't listen to my mind. I have listened to my mind long enough; it leads nowhere, it goes round and round. It again and again takes to the same trip; it is a repetition, it is monotonous.” You say, ”I will listen to you.”
A Master is just an excuse to get rid of the mind. Once you have got rid of the mind there is no need to trust the Master, because you will have come upon your own Master. The Master is simply a passage to your own Master. Via the Master, it becomes easy; otherwise the mind will go on deceiving, and you will not know what to do with the mind.
Listening to the Master, trusting the Master, by and by, the mind is neglected. And many times you have to drop the mind because the Master is saying something which goes against it - it ALWAYS goes against it! Neglected, mind starts dying. Not trusted, mind starts dying. It comes to its right size. Right now it is pretending. Right now it pretends as if it is your whole life. It is just a small, tiny mechanism good to use, very dangerous to make it your master.
Themindsays”Become!”TheMastersays”Be!”Themindsays”Desire!”TheMastersays”Delight!” The mind says, ”You have to go a long way.” The Master says, ”You have arrived, you are Saraha - you have shot the target already.”
The third question:
Question 3
WHATDOYOUTHINKABOUTCIVILIZATION?AREYOUABSOLUTELYAGAINSTIT?
THERE IS NO CIVILIZATION ANYWHERE - so how can I be against it? It exists not. It is just a pretension. Yes, man has lost his primitive, primordial innocence, but man has not become civilized - because that is NO way to become civilized. The only way to become civilized is to base yourself on your innocence, to base yourself on your primitive innocence, to grow from there.
That's why Jesus says: Unless you are reborn, unless you become a child again, you will never know what truth is.
This so-called civilization is fake, it is a pseudo coin. If I am against it, I am not against civilization - because this is not civilization. I am against it because this is not civilization at all. It is fake.
I have heard:
Someone once asked the former Prince of Wales, ”What is your idea of civilization?”
”It is a good idea,” replied the Prince, ”somebody ought to start it.”
I love the answer. Yes, somebody ought to start it - it has not yet been started. Man is not civilized; man only pretends.
I am against pretensions. I am against hypocrisies. Man only shows that he is civilized. Scratch him a little and you will find an uncivilized man. Scratch him a little and all that is good is just superficial, and all that is bad is very deep-rooted. It is a skin-deep civilization. Everything goes well; you are smiling and everything, and somebody just throws a word at you, an insult, and you are mad, and you are a maniac and you want to kill. Just a moment before, you were smiling; and just a moment afterwards,youarereadytokill,yourmurderouspossibilitieshavesurfaced. What kind of civilization is this?
A man can be civilized only when he has become really meditative. Only meditation can bring real civilization to the world. Only Buddhas are civilized.
And this is the paradox: that Buddhas are not against the primitive - they use the primitive as the base, they use the childhood innocence as the base. And on that base a great temple is erected. This civilization destroys the innocence of childhood, and then it gives you just false coins. First it destroys your primal innocence. Once primal innocence is destroyed, you have become cunning, clever, calculating; then you are trapped, then this society goes on civilizing you.
Firstitmakesyoualienatedfromyourownself. Onceyouarealienated,thenitgivesyoufalsecoins you have to depend on it. Real civilization will not be against your nature, will not be against your childhood.Itwillbeagrowthuponit.Itwillnothaveanyantagonismtowardsprimitiveinnocence,it willbeafloweringofit.Itwillgohigherandhigher,butitwillberootedintheprimalinnocence.
This civilization is nothing but a maddening affair. Can't you see the whole earth has become a big madhouse?Peoplehavelosttheirsouls,peoplearenomorepeople-theyhavelosttheirself,they havelosttheirpersonality. Theyhavelostall! They are just pretenders. Theyhavemasks;theyhave lost their original faces.
I am all for civilization, but this is not civilization. That's why I am against it. I would like a man really civilized, really cultured, but that culture can only grow it cannot be forced from the outside. It can come only from the within. It can spread towards the periphery, but it should rise, it HAS to rise, at the center.
This civilization is doing just the opposite: it forces things from the outside. There is a non-violent preaching all over the world - Mahavir, Buddha, Jesus, they all teach non-violence. They teach non-violence because they have enjoyed non-violence. But followers? - they have never enjoyed any moment of nonviolence. They know only violence. But they are followers, so they pretend to be non-violent, they force a non-violence upon themselves, they create a character. That character is just around them. It is an armour. Deep down they are boiling like volcanos ready to erupt. And on the surface they smile the false smile, the plastic smile.
This is not civilization. This is a very ugly phenomenon. Yes, I would like the non-violence to come from within, not to be cultivated from the outside, but helped. That is the root meaning of the word'education'. Itis almost like drawing water from awell: education meansto drawout;thatisthe root meaning of the word'education'. But what has education been doing? It never draws anything out - it forces in. It goes on forcing things in the head of the child; it is not worried about the child at all, it does not think about the child. The child is just used as a mechanism into which more and more information has to be fed. This is not education!
The child's soul has to be brought out. That which is hidden in the child has to be brought out. The child has not to be patterned; his freedom should be left intact, and his consciousness has to be helped to grow. More information is not more education! More awareness is education, more love is education. And education creates civilization.
This civilization is false; its education is false. That's why I am against it. I am against it because it is not really a civilization.
Question 4
OSHO, I LAUGH SO MUCH AT YOUR JOKES. I WOULD LIKE TO ASK ONE QUESTION: WHY DOES A JOKE CREATE SO MUCH LAUGHTER?
ONE THING: you have never been allowed to laugh; your laughteris repressed. It is like a repressed spring - any excuse is enough and it comes out. You have been taught to be sad, long faces; you have been taught to be serious.
If you are serious, nobody thinks that you are doing something wrong; it is accepted, it is the way things have to be. But if you are laughing, laughing too much, then people will start feeling embarrassed by you. They will start thinking something is weird:'Why is this man laughing'?” And if you are laughing without any reason, then you are mad; then they will take you to the psychiatrist; then they will hospitalize you. They will say, ”He laughs without any reason! Only mad people laugh without any reason.”
In a better world, in a more civilized world, in a really civilized world, laughter will be accepted as natural. Only when a person is sad will we hospitalize him.
Sadness is illness: laughter is health. So, because you have not been allowed to laugh. any small excuse... jokes are excuses to laugh; you can laugh without being called mad. You can say, ”Because of the joke ” And a joke has a mechanism: it helps you uncoil. The whole mechanism
of a joke is very complex in a way simple-looking; deep down very complex. A joke is not a joke! It is a difficult phenomenon. In a few words, in a few lines, it can create such a change in the whole climate. What happens?
When a joke is told, first you start expecting that there is going to be some laughter. You are ready for it. You autohypnotize yourself; you become alert. You may have been dozing and sleeping, but now there is a joke you become alert. Your backbone is straight; you listen attentively. You become more aware. And then the story goes on in such a way that it creates more and more tension in you. You want to know the conclusion. The joke goes on one plane, and there seems to be nothing much like ajokein it, and then there isasudden turn Thatsudden turn releases your spring. You
become tense and tense because you are waiting and waiting and waiting... and you see that there seems to be nothing much in it. And then suddenly it is there! And it is so suddenly there, so out of the blue, that you forget your seriousness, that you forget who you are, that you become a child again in that suddenness - and you laugh. And your repressed laughter is released.
Jokes simply show that the society has forgotten how to laugh. In a better world where people will be laughing more, we will miss one thing: the joke. There will be no need - people will be laughing and people will be happy. Why? Each momentwill be amomentoflaughter. And ifyoucan see life, it is ALL joke. But you are not allowed to see! Blinkers have been put on your eyes; you are only allowed to see so much. You are not allowed to see the ridiculousness of it - it IS ridiculous!
Children can see it more easily; that's why children are laughing more easily and more loudly. And they create embarrassment in parents, because they can see the whole nonsense of it. And the blinkers are not yet fixed. Thefathergoeson saying tothe child,”Be true, always be true!”And then a man knocks on the door, and the father says, ”Go and tell him that father is not at home.” Now the child... the father cannot see whatishappening,butthe child laughs. He cannotbelieve whatis happening - this is ridiculous! And the child goes to the stranger knocking on the door and he says, ”Father says he is not at home.” He takes the whole juice out of it. He enjoys every bit of it.
We live with blinkers. We are cultivated in such a way that we don't see the ridiculousness of life; otherwise it is ridiculous. That's why sometimes even without a joke, in some small thing... for example: Ford slipped and fell on the ground. Why did people who were standing there have a good laugh? They may not have shown it, but they had a good laugh.
Just think: if a beggar slips on a banana peel, nobody will bother; but a president of a country slips on abananapeel -thewholeworld will laugh. Why? Becausethebananapeel broughtthingsright! That banana peel showed to the president that he is as much a human being as a beggar. And the bananapeelmakesnodifferenceatall. Comebeggar,comepresident,comeprimeminister,makes no difference. A banana peel is a banana peel; it does not bother.
Ifan ordinary man falls,youwill have a little laughter but not much, because he is an ordinary man; henevertriedtoprovethatheismorethanlifesize-sothereisnotmuch laughter. Butifapresident slips on a banana peel, suddenly the ridiculousness of it, the reality of it, that this man was thinking that he was at the top of the world - whom were you trying to befool? - even a banana peel is not befooled. And you laugh.
Watch... wherever you laugh, the ridiculousness of life has entered through your blinkers. You are again a child. A joke brings you back your childhoodness, your innocence. For a moment it helps the blinkers to slip from the eyes.
Listen to a few jokes:
One of the local men was found dead under unusual circumstances. Therefore a coroner's jury was impanelled, and the foreman called the woman in whose bed the man had died to testify. The foreman assured herthatall presentkneweach other,and thatshe should justtell in herown words what had happened.
The woman related that she and the man, now deceased, had met in the local pub, and when 'time' was called had gone on to her place to have another drink. One thing led to another and they ended up in bed together. Suddenly she noticed a strange look in his eyes which she described to the coroner's jury in these words: ”Coming, I thought, but going he was.”
And the second:
An old deacon having occasion to spend a night at a hotel was assigned a room containing three singlebeds,twoofwhichalreadyhadoccupants. Soon after the light was extinguished, one of these began to snore so loudly as to prevent the deacon from getting to sleep. The tumult increased as the night wore away until it became absolutely fearful. Some two or three hours after midnight the snorerturnedhimselfinbed,gaveahideousgroanandbecamesilent.
The deacon had supposed the third gentleman asleep, but at this juncture he heard him exclaim, ”He is dead! Thank God, he is dead.”
And the last is a very precious one - meditate over it:
One day, when Jesus was walking through a village, he came upon an angry mob who had backed a woman up against a wall and were getting ready to stone her.
Raising his hand, Jesus quieted the mob and then said solemnly, ”Now, let that one who is without sin cast the first stone.”
Immediately a little old lady picked up a big rock and hurled it at the woman. ”Mother,” said Jesus between gritted teeth, ”you exasperate me.”
And the last question:
Question 5
IT IS OBVIOUS THAT YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH ORANGE - BUT THEN WHY DON'T YOU YOURSELF WEAR ORANGE:'
I - and in love with orange? God forbid! I hate it! That's why I force you to wear it. It is a sort of punishment for not being enlightened yet.

25 April 1977 am in Buddha Hall
TOA FLY THAT LIKES THE SMELL OF PUTRID
MEAT, THE FRAGRANCE OF SANDALWOOD IS FOUL.
BEINGS WHO DISCARD NIRVANA
COVET COARSE SAMSARA'S REALM.
AN OX'S FOOTPRINTS FILLED WITH WATER
WILL SOON DRY UP; SO WITH A MIND THAT'S FIRM BUT FULL OF QUALITIES THAT ARE NOT PERFECT, THESEIMPERFECTIONSWILLIN TIME DRY UP.
LIKE SALT SEA WATER THAT TURNS
SWEET WHEN DRUNK UP BY THE CLOUDS, SO A FIRM MIND THAT WORKS FOR OTHERS TURNS THE POISON OF SENSE-OBJECTS INTO NECTAR.
IF INEFFABLE,NEVERIS ONEUNSATISFIED,
IF UNIMAGINABLE,ITMUST BE BLISS ITSELF.
THOUGH FROM A CLOUD ONE FEARS THE THUNDERCLAP,
THECROPSRIPEN WHEN FROM IT POURS THE RAIN .
MAN ISA MYTH, AND THE MOST DANGEROUS MYTH - because ifyou believe that man exists, then you don't try to evolve the man at all; there is no need. If you believe that you are already a man, then all growth stops.
You are not already a man, you are just a potentiality to be. You can be. You may not be. You may miss. Remember,itcan be missed.
Man is not born; it is not a given fact. You cannot take it for granted. It is JUST a possibility. Man exists as a seed, not as a tree - not yet. Man is not yet actual, and the difference between the potential and the actual is great.
Man as he exists is just a machine - yet he works, yet he succeeds in the world, yet he lives a so-called life and dies. But remember, he exists not. His function is that of a mechanism; he is a robot.
Man is a machine. Yes, this machine can grow something in it which can go beyond mechanism. This machine is no ordinary machine; it has tremendous potentiality to go beyond itself. It can produce something transcendental to its own structure. Sometimes it has produced a Buddha, a Christ, a Gurdjieff. Sometimes it HAS produced a man, but don't you believe that you are already a man. If you believe, your belief will be suicidal - because once we believe that something is already there, then we stop looking for it, then we stop creating it, then we stop discovering it, then we stop evolving it.
Just think: an ill person, a seriously ill person, thinks he is healthy. Why should he go to the doctor? Why should he take any medicine? Why should he go under treatment? Why should he be willing to go to the hospital? He believes he is healthy, he's in perfect health... and he is dying! His belief will kill him.
That's why I say this myth is very dangerous, the most dangerous myth ever evolved by the priests and the politicians: that man is already on the earth. These millions of people on the earth are just possibilities;andunfortunately,themajorityofthem arenevergoingtobecomeactual;unfortunately, many of them will die as machines.
WhatdoImeanwhen Isaymanisamachine? Imeanthatmanlivesoutofthepast. Manlivesoutof adead structure. Man livesoutofhabit. Man livesalifeofroutine. Man goeson moving in thesame circle,in thesamerut... again and again and again. Can'tyou seetheviciouscirclein yourlife? The same things you have been doing every day: hoping, being angry, desiring, being ambitious, being sensual, sexual, being frustrated, again hoping, again the whole circle moves. Each hope leads to a frustration, never is it otherwise; and after each frustration a new hope - and the circle starts moving.
In the East we call it the wheel of Samsara. It is a wheel! The spokes are the same. And you are deluded by it again and again. You again start hoping. And you know - you have hoped before, you have hoped millions of times, and nothing happens out of that hope. Just the wheel goes on moving - and goes on killing you, goes on destroying your life.
Time is running out of your hands. Each moment that is lost is lost for ever, and you go on repeating the old.
ThisiswhatImean when Isayman isamachine. Iagreewith George Gurdjieff absolutely. He used to say that you don't have a soul yet. He was the first man to say it so drastically, that you don't have a soul yet. Yes, the soul can be born in you, but you will have to give birth to it. You will have to become capable of giving birth to it.
Down the centuries the priests have told you that you have already that soul, that you are already that man. That is not so. You are only potentially so. You can become actually too, but the myth has to be destroyed. See the fact of it: you are not a conscious being, and if you are not a conscious being how can you be a man?
What is the difference between a rock and you? What is the difference between an animal and you? What is the difference between a tree and you? The difference is that of consciousness - but how much consciousness do you have? Just a flicker here and there. Just sometimes, in rare moments, you become conscious; and that is only for seconds and again you fall back into unconsciousness. Yes, sometimes it happens, because it is your potentiality. Sometimes it happens in spite of you.
One day the sun is rising and you fall into tune with existence - and suddenly it is there, the beauty of it, the benediction of it, the fragrance of it, the light of it. Suddenly it is there and you have a taste of what it would be, what it can be, what it is. But the moment you become alert that it is there, it is already gone. Only a memory is left. Only for rare moments: sometimes in love, sometimes watching a full moon, sometimes a rising sun, sometimes sitting in a silent mountain cave, sometimes looking at a child playing, giggling; yes, sometimes in music, but these moments are rare.
If an ordinary man, the so-called man, achieves seven moments of awareness in his whole life, that will be too much. Rarely, very rarely, just a ray enters, and then it is gone. And you are back to your trivial life, dull and dead. And this is not so only with ordinary people: it is so with your so-called extraordinary people.
Just the other day I was reading about Carl Jung, one of the greatest psychologists of this age. But sometimes one wonders whether to call these people psychologists or not. He was a very restless man, absolutely restless. He could not sit silently for a single moment. He would turn and toss; he would do something or other. If there was nothing to do he would smoke his pipe. And he was a chain-smoker. Then he had a heart attack and the doctors said to stop smoking - an absolute stop. Now it was very difficult. He started feeling his restlessness too much. He started feeling crazy. He would walk up and down in the room, he would go outside - for no reason. He would sit in this chair and the other. And then he recognized the fact that the pipe had been very very helpful. It was a release, a sort of release of his restlessness. So he asked the doctors, ”Can I put the empty pipe in my mouth? Is it allowed?” Empty pipe! ”That will help me.”
He was allowed, and then for years he used to put the empty pipe in his mouth, just pretending that he was smoking. And then he would look at the pipe, would keep the pipe in the hand, would play with the pipe. And this is about a great psychologist of this age! What unconsciousness! So much in the grip of the habit, so much in the grip of the unconscious! It looks very childish. And then we go on finding rationalizations; then we go on pretending to ourselves, then we go on protecting and defending ourselves, as to why we are doing this.
At the age of forty-five Carl Jung fell in love with a woman. He was a married man, with a very loving wife. Nothing was wrong, but it must have been the restlessness. It almost always happens that near about the age of forty-five one starts feeling that the whole life is gone. Death is coming closer. And because of death coming closer, either you become spiritual or you become more sexual.
These are the only two defences: either you turn in search of truth, of the eternal, which will have no death, or you start drowning yourself in more erotic fantasies. And particularly intellectuals, those who have lived their whole lives through the head, are more victims at the age of forty-five. Then the sexuality takes revenge. It has been denied; now death is coming closer. and then one never knows whether you will be here again or not, whether life will be there or not. Death is coming here and you have lived a life of the head. Sexuality erupts with a vengeance.
Carl Gustav Jung fell in love with a young woman. Now, it was very much against his prestige. The wife was disturbed, and the wife had loved him tremendously and trusted him. He rationalized it beautifully. Look at his rationalization - that's how unconscious man goes on living. He will do something unconsciously, then will try to rationalize it, and will try to prove that it is not unconscious: ”I am doing it very consciously - in fact, it HAS to be done.”
What did he do? He suddenly developed a theory that there are two types of women in the world: one, the mother type, the caring type, the WIFEtype;and the other, the mistress type, the beloved, who becomes an inspiration. And man needs both - and a man like Carl Gustav Jung certainly needs both. He needs inspiration too. He needs a caring woman; that his wife is fulfilling - she is loving, amothertype. But that doesn't fulfill his need - he needs inspiration too, heneedsaromantic woman too, a mistress who can take him into deep dreams; that is a must for him. Jung developed this theory. This is a rationalization.
Now, he never developed the other part of it, that men are two types. That's where you can find that it is a rationalization. If it was a real insight, then the other part, that men are two types, the father type and the lover type... then Jung's wife needs two! If Jung thinks that he is a lover type, then she needs the father type. If Jung thinks he is a father type, then she needs a lover type. But that he never developed. That'showyou can see itisnotan insight. Itisjustatrickymind, arationalization.
We go on rationalizing. We do things unconsciously. We do them without knowing why we are doing them. But we cannot accept the fact - it is very humiliating to accept that ”I have been doing something of which I am not aware and I don't know why.” Beware of rationalizations.
And how can such people be beneficial to others? It is a well known fact that many of Carl Jung's patients committed suicide. Why? They had come to be helped - why did they commit suicide? Something must be basically wrong. His analysis is just lousy. He is a very arrogant man, very egoistic; continuously ready to fight. Maybe his whole psychoanalysis developed only as his arrogance against Sigmund Freud. Maybe it is again just a rationalization, because he himself seems to be suffering from the same problems he is thinking to help others about.
Jung was always afraid of ghosts; even in his old age he was afraid of ghosts. He did not publish his most important book while he was alive because he was afraid that people would come to know the facts. So his memoirs were published, but he made certain that they should be published only whenhewasdead. Now,whattypeoftruthandauthenticityisthis?Hewassomuchafraidofbeing found wrong or in the wrong that he never allowed any fact to be disclosed about his life while he was alive.
I was reading one anecdote:
A man came to a psychiatrist and proceeded to unfold before the doctor his life story, covering his childhood experiences, his emotional life, his eating habits, his vocational problems, and everything else he could think of. ”Well,” said the doctor, ”it doesn't seem to me as though there were anything wrong with you. You seem as sane as I am.”
”But, doctor,” protested the patient, a note of horror creeping into his voice, ”it's these butterflies. I can't stand them. They're all over me.”
”For heaven's sake,” cried the doctor, recoiling, ”don't brush them off on me!”
The patients and the doctors, all are in the same boat. The psychoanalyst and the analyzed are not veryfarapart. Itisagame. Maybethepsychoanalystismoreclever,butitisnotthatheknowsthe reality - because to know the reality you will have to become tremendously conscious; there is no other way. It is not a question of intellectual thinking. It has nothing to do with your philosophizing. To know reality one has to grow into awareness.
Gurdjieff used to talk about a future psychology. He used to say that psychology still exists not, becausehowcanitexist?Evenmanexistsnot!Whenmanisnotthere,howcantherebeascience about man? First the man has to exist, then the science about the man can exist. Right now, whatsoever exists is not psychology. Maybe it is something about the machine that man is.
Psychology can exist only around a Buddha. With consciousness Buddha lives. You can find what his psyche is, what his soul is. Ordinary man lives without a soul. Yes, you can find something wrong in his mechanism, and that wrong can be put right. What we know as psychology today is nothing but behaviorism. And in THAT sense, Pavlov and Skinner are FAR truer than Freud and Jung-becausetheythinkmanisamachine. Theyaretrueaboutthemanthatexists,althoughthey are not absolutely true because they think this is the end: man cannot be otherwise. That is their limitation: they think man can only be the machine. They are true as far as the present-day man is concerned man is a machine but they think that man cannot be otherwise... there they are wrong. But Freud and Jung and Adler are more wrong because they think man is already on the earth: all that you need is to study man and you will know. But man is not there. It is a very unconscious phenomenon.
Man is a myth - let that be one of the most basic insights. It will help you to come out of the lie, out of the deception.
TANTRA IS AN EFFORT TO MAKE YOU MORE CONSCIOUS. The very word'Tantra' means expansion of awareness. It comes from a Sanskrit root'tan':'tan' means expansion. Tantra means expansion of consciousness - and the basic fact, and the most fundamental fact to be understood is that you are fast asleep, you have to be awakened.
Tantra believes in school methods - that has to be understood also. In that sense Gurdjieff is one of the greatest tantrikas of this age. For example: if one is asleep, there is very little possibility that one can become awake alone. Look at it in this way: on the new year day you think, as you have always thought, and many new year days have passed, and always you havetaken avowthatnever again will you smoke - and again the new year has come and you start thinking this time it is going to happen. You take a vow that you will never smoke, but you don't go and tell it to others; you are afraid to. To say it to others is dangerous because you know yourself: many times you have broken your vows - then it is very humiliating. So you keep it to yourself. Now there is only one possibility out of a hundred that the vow will be kept; ninety-nine possibilities are that it will be broken sooner or later.
You are an unconscious being; your vow does not mean much. But if you go and you tell everybody in the town - friends, colleagues, children, wife - you go and tell everybody that ”I have taken a vow that I am not going to smoke,” there are more possibilities, at least ten percent, that you will not smoke. First there was only one possibility, now there are ten possibilities. Ninety percent the possibility is that you will smoke; but non-smoking has more ground, more solidity. From one percent it has gone to ten percent. But if you join a group of non-smokers, if you join a society of non-smokers, then the possibility is even more: ninety-nine percent is the possibility that you will not smoke. What happens?
When you are alone you don't have any support from outside - you are alone; you can fall asleep easily. And nobody knows, so you are not worried either. When all know, their knowing will function to keep you more alert. Now your ego is at stake, your respect and honor are at stake. But if you join a society of nonsmokers, then the possibility is even more - because you live through habits! Somebody takes his cigarette-box out of his pocket, and suddenly you start looking in your pocket. You are just mechanical: somebodyissmokingand you start thinking how beautiful itwastosmoke. Nobody smokes, and you are in the society of non-smokers, then nobody will remind you; and the habit by and by will disappear - out of no use. If a habit is not used, by and by it disappears; it tends to become dead, it loses its grip on you.
Tantra says man can become awake only through group methods, through schools. That's why I insist so much for sannyas. Alone, you don't stand a chance. Together, much more possibility. It is as if ten persons are lost in a desert, and it is very dangerous in the night: the enemies can kill them, the wild animals can kill them, the robbers can come, the murderers can come - it is very difficult. Now they decide on a group method. They say: ”Each one will be awake for one hour.” To think that each one will be capable of remaining awake for eight hours in the night is to ask too much from an unconscious man; buteach one will remain awake for one hour. And before he starts falling asleep, he should make somebody else awake; then there is more possibility that at least one of the group will be awake the whole night.
Or, as Gurdjieff used to say: You are in a prison and you want to come out of the prison. Alone, there is not much chance, but if all the prisoners become a group, then there is much more chance - they can throw the guard, they can kill the guard, they can break the wall. If all the prisoners are together, then there is much more chance that they can come out into freedom.
Butthechanceswillincreaseevenmoreiftheyareincontactwithafewpeoplewhoareoutsidethe prison, who are already free. That is the whole meaning of finding a Master: finding somebody who is already outside the prison. He can be of tremendous help - for many reasons. He can supply necessary things which will be needed for you to come out of the prison. He can send instruments, files, so that you can break out of the prison. He can watch from the outside and he can inform you when the guards change - in that interval there is a possibility to get out. He can inform you when the guards fall asleep in the night. He can make arrangements so that the guards are drunk on one particular night. He can invite the jailor to his house for a party. He can do a thousand and one things which you cannot do from the inside. He can find support for you from the outside. He can create an atmosphere so that when you are released from the jail you will be accepted by the people, you will be sheltered, taken into houses. If the society is not ready to accept you from the outside, you may come out of the jail but the society will deliver you back to the prison authorities.
To be in contact with someone who is already awake is a must. And to be together with those people who are all thinking to become awake is also a must. This is the meaning of a school method, a group method. Tantra is a group method. It says: Be together. Find out all the possibilities; so many people can be together and they can pool their energies. Somebody is very intelligent, and somebodyisveryloving. Both arehalf,buttogethertheybecomemoreofaunity,morewholeness.
Manishalf,womanishalf. Except for Tantra, all the seekers have tried to do without the other. Man has tried alone, women have tried alone. Tantra says: Why not be together - join hands together? The woman is half, the man is half - together they are a greater energy, a more whole energy, a healthier energy. Join together! Let yin and yang function together. There will be more possibility of getting out of it.
Other methods use fight and conflict. Man starts fighting with women, starts escaping from women rather than using the possibility of the help, he starts thinking of the woman as the enemy. Tantra says this is sheer foolishness; you are wasting your energy unnecessarily fighting with the woman - because there are greater things to be fought about! It is better to keep company with the Woman; let her help you, and you help her. Go together as one unit and you have more chances to stand against the unconscious nature.
Use all possibilities; then only is there SOME chance that you can evolve into a conscious being, you can become a Buddha.
Now the sutras these are very significant sutras - first sutra:
TOA FLY THAT LIKES THE SMELL OF PUTRID
MEAT, THE FRAGRANCE OF SANDALWOOD IS FOUL.
BEINGS WHO DISCARD NIRVANA
COVET COARSE SAMSARA'S REALM.
FIRST THING: just as I said - man is a machine. Man lives out of habit, out of the past, out of memories. Man lives out of knowledge that he has known, acquired before. So he goes on missing the new... and the truth is always the new. He is like a fly that likes the smell of putrid meat, the foul and fetid odor; the fragrance of sandalwood is foul to that fly. She has a certain cast of memory, a certain past. She has always thought that the putrid smell of meat is fragrance. That is her knowledge, that is her habit, that is her routine - that is her dead past. Now, suddenly she comes across sandalwood: the fragrance of sandalwood will look to the fly as if it is a very foul and fetid odor.
Don't be surprised... that's what is happening to you. If you have lived too much in the body, then even coming closerto aman wholivesin hissoul and youwill feel something iswrong. Coming to a Buddha, you will not feel the fragrance; you may even start feeling a bad smell. Your interpretation - otherwise why did people murder Jesus? Jesus was a sandalwood! And people simply killed him. Why did people poison Socrates? Socrates was sandalwood! But the flies - they understand their own past, they interpret according to their past.
One day I was reading: A prostitute, the most famous prostitute of Athens, once came to Socrates. And a few people were sitting there, just a few people, just as here a few people are sitting, and Socrates was talking to them. The prostitute looked around and said to Socrates, ”Why? - such a great man like you, and only so few people listening to you? I had thought the whole of Athens would be here! And I don'tseethemostrespectable,themosthonored -thepoliticians,thepriests, the intellectuals - I don't see them here. What is the matter? Come, Socrates, some day to my house - you will find them standing in a queue!”
Socrates said, ”You are right - because you cater for a universal demand I don't. I attract only a few, a chosen few. Others cannot feel my fragrance. They avoid! Even if they come across me, they escape. They are afraid. Itis a totally differentfragrance,”said Socrates.
The prostitute must have been of tremendous intelligence. She looked into the eyes of Socrates, bowed down, and said, ”Socrates, accept me as one of your friends,” and never left, became part of that small school.
Must have been a woman of great awareness - so sudden a change. She understood it so immediately! But Athens killed Socrates. They did not like the man. The man looked very dangerous. Against him there were many charges. One was that ”He destroys people's beliefs, he destroys young people's minds. He is anarchic. If he is allowed to live any more the society will be uprooted - he is a dangerous enemy.” What was he doing?
He was doing something totally different: he was trying to create a state of no-mind. But the people thought ”He destroys people's minds.” They are also right, the flies. Yes, young people were tremendously attracted to Socrates - because only young people can be attracted to such things, only youth has that courage. Even if old people come to me or to Socrates, they are young people only. That's why they come; otherwise they cannot come. An old, rotten mind cannot come to me. Maybe the body is old, but if an old man comes to me or an old woman, she comes only because she still has the youth of her soul, she is still young somewhere; still she is able to understand the new, to learn the new. They say you cannot teach an old dog new tricks - it is very difficult. The old dog knows old tricks, and he goes on repeating them. It is very difficult to teach anything to an old mind.
And these things are SO radically different, so diametrically opposite to all that has been taught to you, that unless a man is REALLY young he cannot even listen.
So young people were attracted. That was a sign that something of the eternal, something of the eternal youngness of the universe, was pouring through Socrates.
When Jesus is alive you will find young people following him. You will not find young people going to see the Pope - old people, dead people, long, long ago dead, they go to see the Pope. When the original Shankaracharya was alive you would find young people all around him. But to the Shankaracharya of Puri only dead bodies, corpses listen. Alive persons -you cannot find them.
You can goand lookintoanytempleand you will find old women and old men -youth isnotthere. In fact, whenever a religion is REALLY there, youth is attracted; when truth is there, youth is attracted. When there are only lies left, doctrines, dogmas, creeds, then old people come. When youth is attracted, that means truth is young and youth is attracted. When truth is old, almost dead, then dead people are attracted.
Old people are attracted only because of the fear of death. In old age, even atheists become theists... afraid. When a young man is attracted towards something it is not because of the fear of death,becausehedoesnotknowanydeath yet;itisbecauseoftremendousloveforlife. And thatis the difference between real religion and unreal religion. Unreal religion is fear-oriented; real religion is love-oriented.
You must have heard, in all the languages of the world that ugly word exists: godfearing. That must have been coined by dead, dull, old people. Godfearing? How can one fear God? And if you fear God, how can you love Him? Out of fear, never love - only hatred can arise. Out of fear you can be against God, because He will be your enemy; how can you love Him? And if you love Him, how can you be afraid? Have you ever been afraid of the person you love? Have you ever been afraid of your mother if you love her? Have you ever been afraid of your woman if you love her? If you love, there is no fear - LOVE CASTETH OUT ALL FEAR. Godloving... romantically in love with God... ecstatically in love with God
But that is possible only for the young mind. Whether the young mind is in the young body or in the old body, that is irrelevant - but it is possible only for the young mind. Now, Socrates is punished because he attracted young people. Buddha is punished because he attracted young people. But always remember: whenever a religion is born, young people rush from all corners of the world.
THEY should be the symbol that something has happened. When old people are rushing somewhere, you can be certain nothing is happening there. That is not where the action is! Where young people are going, that is the place where action is. But:
TO A FLY THAT LIKES THE SMELL OF PUTRID
MEAT, THE FRAGRANCE OFSANDALWOOD IS FOUL.
BEINGS WHO DISCARD NIRVANA
COVET COARSE SAMSARA'S REALM.
Truth is the unknown, the mysterious. You cannot approach it through your past habit. You can approach it only when you are naked of all habits.
The Christian priest's robe is called'the habit' - it is a beautiful use of the word'habit'. Yes, I say, whenyouarenudeofallhabits,nakedofallhabits,alldressesaredropped,youfunctionnotthrough memory but through awareness; these are two different functions. You function through memory, then you don't see that which is. You go on seeing that which you have seen before. You go on interpreting the present in terms of the past. You go on imposing something which is not there. You go on seeing things which are not, and you go on not seeing things which are. Memory has to be put aside. Memory is good, use it, but truth has never been known through memory. How can you know truth through memory? You have never known truth in the past.
Truth is not known. Truth is a stranger. You will have to put all memory aside. You will have to say to your mind, ”Keep quiet. Let me see without you! Let me look only with clarity, not with clouded eyes, no thoughts, no beliefs, no scriptures, no philosophies, no religions. Let me look directly, immediately!Letmelookherenow,letmelookintothatwhichisconfrontingme.”Onlythenareyou in tune with the mystery of truth.
And remember: truth never becomes a memory. Even when you have known it, it never becomes a memory. Truth is so vast, it cannot be contained by the memory. And whenever it will again be there, and you will know it, it will again be new. It is never old. It is always new. It is always fresh - that is one of its qualities, that it never becomes old. It is always young.
So if you want to know the truth, Saraha says to the king, Sir, if you really want to know the truth of what has happened to me, you put aside your mind. I know you are just like a fly. You have lived a life of body and mind; you don't know anything beyond them. I am standing here: I am beyond both. And there is no way to explain it to you according to your mind; no, it cannot be explained. If you really want to experience it, you can experience it, but it cannot be explained.
God cannot be defined. God cannot be explained. Please remember, never explain it; because if you explain it you will be explaining it away. God cannot be contained by any thought, but God can be lived, God can be loved. YOU CAN BECOME GODS! that is possible - but the mind cannot contain the God. Mind is a very small container. It is like a teaspoon - and you want to have the Pacific ocean in the teaspoon'? Yes,you can havealittlesaltywaterin yourteaspoon,butthatwon't give the idea of the Pacific, of the vastness. Storms won't happen in your teaspoon; great waves will not arise. Yes, it will taste like it, but it will not be an ocean.
Sarahasays:Ifyouwanttoseeme,sir,youwillhavetoputyourmindasideyouhaveafly'smind. You have certain habits of thinking, of feeling; you have certain habits of living. You have lived a life of body and mind, and, at the most, whatsoever you have known up to now is just heard by you - you have read scriptures.
Saraha himself was reading scriptures to the king before; he knows it well. He knows what the king knows:hisknowledgeisjustinformation.Sarahasays:Ithashappenedtome!Buttoseeityouwill need a different quality of seeing.
Mind never meets the truth, never encounters the truth. The ways of the mind and the ways of the truth are absolutely separate. It is a separate reality. Hence the insistence of all the mystics of the world to attain to a state of no-mind. That's what meditation is all about: a state of no-mind, a state of non-thinking - yet fully aware, luminous with awareness. When there is not a single thought, your sky is clean of all clouds, and then the sun shines bright.
Ordinarily we are clouded with so many thoughts, desires, ambitions, dreams, that the sun cannot shine. It hides behind those dark clouds. Desire is a cloud, thought is a cloud, imagination is a cloud - and one needs to be unclouded to know that which is.
Saraha says:
BEINGS WHO DISCARD NIRVANA
COVET COARSE SAMSARA'S REALM.
SAMSARA MEANS TO LIVE AS BODY, AS MIND, AS EGO.'Samsara' means to live outwards.'Samsara' means to live with things,'Samsara' means to live with the idea that all is matter and nothing else.'Samsara' means three poisons: power, prestige, pull - to live in the world with the idea of having more power, more prestige, more money, more pull... this and that; to live in things and for things. That is the meaning of the word'Samsara' - THE WORLD.
Just watch yourself: have you ever lived with persons or do you live only with things? Is your wife a person or a thing? Is your husband a person or a thing? Do you treat your husband as a person, as a superbly, intrinsically valuable person, or just as a utility - that he is the provider of bread and butter, or that she is the housekeeper, looks after the children? Is your wife an end unto herself, or is she just a utility, a commodity to be used? Sometimes you use her sexually, sometimes you use her in other ways - but using the person means the person is a thing to you, not a person.
A person cannot be used; only things can be used. A person cannot be purchased; only things can be purchased. A person has such tremendous value, such divinity, such dignity - how can you use a person? Yes, he can give out of her or his love, but you cannot use. And you have to be thankful. Have you ever been thankful to your wife? Have you ever been thankful to your father, to your mother? Have you ever been thankful to your friends? Sometimes you are thankful to a stranger, but never to your own people - because you take them for granted.
To live with things is to live in Samsara. To live with persons is to live in Nirvana. And once you start living with persons, things start disappearing. Ordinarily, even persons are reduced to things, and when a person starts becoming meditative even things start becoming persons, even a tree becomes a person, a rock becomes a person. Everything, by and by, starts having a personality - because God is spread all over the existence.
Saraha says: Sir, you have lived in Samsara and you cannot understand the way of Nirvana. If you really want to understand it, you will have to live it - there is no other way. To know, you will have to taste something of it. And I am here, standing before you - and you are asking for explanations!? Nirvana is standing in front of you, and you are asking for theories? Not only that - you must be utterly blind - you have come to persuade me to come back to your Samsara?! A fly is persuading me to leave the forest of sandalwood and its fragrance for the putrid smell of meat. HAVE YOU GONE MAD? said Saraha to the king. Let me persuade you to come to my world rather than you persuading me to come to your world. I have known your world, and I have known this new reality too. I can compare. You have known only your world; you don't know my reality - you can't compare.
When a Buddha says this world is illusory, meditate over it - because he has known this world too. When some atheist, materialist, some communist, says that the world of Nirvana is just illusory, there is no need to bother about it at all - because he has not known it. He knows only this world. You cannot trust his assertions about the other world. He has never meditated, he has never entered into it.
Lookatit: of all those who have meditated, notasingleonehasdeniedtheinnerreality-notasingle one! Without exception, all the meditators have become mystics. Those who have not meditated, theyknowonlytheworld oftheflyand theworld ofthefoul and fetid odorofputrid meat. Theylivein the rotten world of things, but they know only that and, certainly, their statements cannot be trusted. A Buddha can be trusted, a Christ can be trusted, a Mahavir can be trusted. They have known both! They have known the lower and the higher; and by knowing the higher, they say something about the lower which has to be meditated upon. Don't reject it outright.
For example, Marx, Engels, Lenin, Stalin, Mao, they have never meditated - and they say there is no God. Now, itis almost as ifaman has nevergone to the lab ofthe scientistand says something about science, a man who has never gone into the lab and says that the theory of relativity is just mumbo-jumbo - it cannot be relied upon. You have to go to the lab, you have to go into higher mathematics - you have to prove it! Just because you cannot understand it, you cannot be allowed to deny it.
There are very few people who understand the theory of relativity. It was said when Einstein was alive that there were only twelve persons alive who understood his theory all over the world. And there are a fewpeople who think thatis an exaggeration, that number is not right -not even twelve persons were there to understand his theory correctly. But because of that, you cannot say it is not right; you cannot take a vote about it; you cannot defeat it in an election. You will have to go through the same processes.
Now, Marx saying there is no God is simply making a stupid statement - never meditated, never contemplated, never prayed. His statement is irrelevant. Those who have meditated, those who have dug a little deeper into their being, they have come to the same truths.
BEINGS WHO DISCARD NIRVANA
COVET COARSE SAMSARA'S REALM.
Saraha is saying: You discard Nirvana, and you go on rushing after illusions. You have come to persuade me, sir? Look at me. how ecstatic I am. Look at me! I am not the same person who had left your court - I am totally a different person.
Heis tryingto bringthe king'sawarenesstothepresentmoment, and hesucceeded. He musthave been a man of great presence. He pulled the king out of the world of the flies, out of the world of putrid meat. He pulled him to the world of sandalwood and its fragrance.
The second sutra:
AN OX'S FOOTPRINTS FILLED WITH WATER
WILL SOON DRY UP; SO WITH A MIND THAT'S FIRM
BUT FULL OF QUALITIES THAT ARE NOT PERFECT,
THESEIMPERFECTIONSWILLIN TIME DRY UP.
HE SAYS: Look! An ox has walked, and there is a footprint on the land, and the footprint is filled with water, rainwater how long will it be there? Sooner or later it will evaporate and the ox's footprint filled with water will not be there any more. But the ocean is always. Although the water in the ox's footprint is also from the ocean, still something is different.
Theoceanalwaysremains,neverincreasing,neverdecreasing. Greatcloudsariseoutofit: itnever decreases. Great rivers pour their waters into it: itneverincreases. Itremainsalwaysthesame. But thissmallfootprintofanoxisfullofwaterrightnow;withinhoursordaysitwillbegone,itwilldryup -soistheskullofthehumanmind. It is just an ox's footprint; such a small thing. Just a little water is there - don't trust it too much; it is already drying up. It will disappear. The skull is a very small thing. Don't think that you can contain the universe in the skull.
And it can only be temporary: it can never be the eternal.
AN OX'S FOOTPRINTS FILLED WITH WATER
WILL SOON DRY UP; SO WITH A MIND THAT'S FIRM
BUT FULL OF QUALITIES THAT ARE NOT PERFECT,
THESEIMPERFECTIONSWILLIN TIME DRY UP.
What are you keeping in your small skull? What are the contents? Desires, dreams, ambitions, thoughts, imagination, will, emotions - these are the things that you are keeping as content. They ALL will dry up. All contents will dry up! so change the emphasis from the contents to the container. ThatisthewholesecretofTantra. Lookatthecontaineranddon'tlookatthecontent. Theskyisfull of clouds; don't look at the clouds, look at the sky. Don't look at what is there in your head, what is there in your mind - just look at your consciousness. Emotion is there, anger is there, love is there, greed is there, fear is there, jealousy is there - these are contents. Just behind them is the infinite sky of consciousness.
A man who lives through the contents, lives the life of a machine. And the man who starts changing his emphasis from the contents to the container starts living the life of awareness, of Buddhahood.
And says Saraha: Sir, these contents that you are having in your mind will soon dry up - look at that ox's footprint! Your head is not bigger than that, the skull is not bigger than that. But your consciousness is infinite.
Now, this has to be understood: emotions are in your head, but consciousness is not in your head. In fact, your head is in your consciousness! Consciousness is vast, infinite. Emotions, desires, ambitions, are in your head; they will dry up. But even when your head has completely dropped and disappeared into the earth, your consciousness will not disappear. You don't contain the consciousness in you: the consciousness contains you; it is bigger than you.
There are people who ask... sometimes somebody comes to me and asks: ”Where is the soul in the human body? In the heart? In the navel? In the head? Where is the soul?” They think they are asking a very pertinent question. It is nowhere in the body - your body is in the soul. The soul is a bigger phenomenon than your body. The soul surrounds you.
And your soul and my soul are not different! We live in the existence, we live in one soul's ocean. One soul surrounds us, within and without. It is all one energy. I don't have a different soul and you don't have a different soul. We have different bodies. It is almost like the electricity running into the bulb and runninginto the radio and runninginto the TVand movingthe fan... and doingathousand and one things. The fan is different from the bulb, but the electricity that runs them is the same.
We are one energy. Our expressions are different, but our reality is one. If you look at the content, if I look at the content then my dreams are different from yours, certainly. We cannot share our dreams. I have my ambitions, you have your ambitions. And it is not only that we cannot share our dreams: our dreams are in conflict. My ambition is against your ambition; your ambition is against my ambition. But if we forget the contents and just look at consciousness, pure consciousness, cloudless sky - then where is'you' and where is'I'? We are one.
In that moment there is unity. And in that moment there is universal consciousness.
ALL consciousness is universal. Unconsciousness is private. Consciousness is universal. The day you become really a man, you are a universal man. That is the meaning of'Buddha': universal man - come to total and absolute awareness.
Man as a machine is different. This has to be understood. If you are having kidney trouble, I am not having any. If I am having a headache, you are not having the headache; even if you love me you cannot share the headache. Even if I love you I cannot have your pain. But if we two are sitting together and meditatingand amomentcomeswhenIhavenocontentin my mind and you alsodon't have any content in your mind, we will not be two. Meditators begin as separate, but end as one.
If you all are sitting in meditation here, listening to me, then you are not many, then you are one. Then you are not only one: the speaker and the listener are not separate - then we are bridged together. Twenty meditators in a room meditating, when they come to real meditation are no more twenty: there is only one meditative quality in the room.
There is a story: a few people came to see Buddha. Ananda was sitting on guard outside the room. But those people took such a long time that Ananda became worried. Many times he looked in, but they continued and continued and continued... then he came inside the room to see what was happening. And there he found nobody just Buddha sitting. So he asked Buddha, ”Where have thosefellowsgone? And thereisno otherdoor, and Iam sitting at the only door, sowherehavethey gone'?”
And Buddha said, ”They are meditating.”
Itis a beautiful story. They all fell into meditation, and Ananda could not see them because he was still not a meditator. He could not see this new phenomenon, this total shift of energy. They were not there, because they were not as their bodies there; they were not as their minds there. Those egos dissolved. Ananda could see only what HE could see. A new reality had happened.
A great king once came to see Buddha. His prime minister persuaded him to come, but he was a very suspicious man -aspoliticiansand Kingsusuallyare. Very suspicious. Hedidn'twanttocome in the first place; just for political reasons he came to see him,because in the capital the rumorwas spreading that he was against Buddha; and all the people were for Buddha, so he became afraid. It was not diplomatic, so he went to see.
With his prime minister, when he reached closer to the grove where Buddha was sitting with his ten thousand monks, he became very much afraid. He pulled his sword out and he said to the prime minister, ”What is the matter? - because you said ten thousand people are staying there, and we have come so close and there is no noise! Is there some conspiracy?”
The prime minister laughed and be said, ”You don't know buddha's people. You just put your sword back! You come on - there is no conspiracy or anything. You need not be afraid. They are not going to kill you. You don't know Buddha's men.”
But very suspicious, holding his hand on the sword, the king went into the grove. He was surprised. He could not believe there were ten thousand people sitting under the trees silently, as if there was no one. He asked Buddha, ”This is a miracle! - ten thousand people. Even ten people together create so much noise - what are these people doing? What has happened to these people? Has something gone wrong? Are they still alive? They look like statues! And what are they doing sitting here? They should do something! ”
And Buddha said, ”They are doing something, but it has nothing to do with the outside. They are doing somethingin theirinnerworld. Theyarenotintheirbodies,theyareintheirbeings,atthevery core. And these are not ten thousand people right now - they are all part of one consciousness.
The third sutra:
LIKESALT SEA WATER THAT TURNS
SWEET WHEN DRUNK UPBY THE CLOUDS,
SOAFIRMMIND THAT WORKS FOR OTHERS TURNS
THEPOISONOFSENSE-OBJECTS INTONECTAR.
THE BASIC TANTRA ATTITUDE IS: the sensual can be transformed into the sublime, matter can be transformed into mind,the unconscious can be transformed into consciousness.
Modern physics says matter can be transformed intoenergy,energycan betransformed intomatter. In fact, they are not two but the same energy functioning as two forms. Tantra says sex can be transformed into Samadhi the same approach; very basic and fundamental. The lower can be transformed into the higher, because lower ana higher are joined together; it is a ladder. They are never separate, nowhere separate; there is no gap between them. You can move from the lower to the higher. you can move from the higher to the lower.
And that ladder is what man is. He can exist on the lowest rung; that is his decision. He can move upwards, he can exist on the highest rung. He can exist as a beast, or he can exist as a Buddha - both are his rungs, the lowest and the highest. And man is a ladder. He can fall into deep unconsciousness and become a rock, and he can rise to absolute consciousness and can become a God. But both are not separate - that is the beauty of Tantra.
Tantra is non-divisive. Tantra is the only religion which is not schizophrenic. Tantra is the only religion which is really sane - the sanest religion - because it doesn't divide. If you divide, you create asplit. Ifyou tell peoplethatthe bodyisbad, thatthebodyistheenemy, thatthe bodyhasto be condemned, that the body is in the service of the Devil, then you are creating a split in man, then the man becomes afraid of the body. And then, by and by, there is created an unbridgeable gulf, and he is pulled into two parts. He is torn into opposite directions. The bodypulls into the body, the mind tries to pull into the mind -there is aconflictand confusion.
Tantra says you are one; there is no need to have any confusion. You can be fused in one reality. There is no need to have any conflict, there is no need to be torn apart. There is no need to go insane. You can love all that is available, and you can evolve it - with deep love, care, creativity, it can be evolved. The body is not the enemy of your soul; the body is just the sheath of your sword. The body is just the temple, it is your abode. It is not the enemy, it is your friend.
Tantra drops all sorts of violence - not only violence with others, but violence with oneself. Tantra says: Love reality in its totality. Yes, much can be evolved, but all evolution is through love. And there is no need to fight.
LIKE SALT SEA WATER THAT TURNS
SWEET WHEN DRUNK UPBY THE CLOUDS...
You cannot drink the salt sea water; it is so salty, it is all salt. You will die if you drink the salty sea water. Butwhen acloud comesand drawsthe waterfrom the sea, itturnssweet-and then you can drink it.
Saraha says: Samadhi is like a cloud, meditative energy is like a cloud, which turns your sexuality into higher realms, which turns your physical existence into non-physical existence, which turns the salty, bitter experiences of the world into sweet nectar-like experiences of Nirvana. The Samsara itself becomes Nirvana if you can create the cloud that transforms it. That cloud, Buddha has actually called itDHARMAMEGHA SAMADHI-the Samadhi ofthe cloud ofthe fundamental law - DHARMAMEGHASAMADHI.
You can create that cloud. That cloud is created by meditation. You go on intensely meditating, dropping thoughts, dropping desires, ambitions: by and by, your consciousness is a burning fire - that cloud is there. Now you can transform anything through that fire. That fire transmutes, that fire is alchemical. Through meditation the lower becomes higher, the baser metal is turned into gold.
LIKE SALT SEA WATER THAT TURNS
SWEET WHEN DRUNK UP BY THE CLOUDS,
SO A FIRM MIND THAT WORKS FOR OTHERS TURNS
THE POISON OF SENSE-OBJECTS INTO NECTAR.
Two things: first, one has to create a cloud of meditation in one's being; and the second thing is compassion - one who works for others. Buddha insists on two things: meditation and compassion - PRAGYAN and KARUNA. He says that sometimes it happens that a meditator can become too much selfish; then, too, something goes sour. Meditate, delight, but share the delight, go on sharing it; don't hoard it, because once you start hoarding, ego starts arising. Never hoard anything. The momentyou getit, give it, and you will be getting more and more and more. The more you give, the more you get. Then everything becomes nectar. Everything is nectar - we just have to know how to turn it, we have to know the alchemy.
The last sutra:
IFINEFFABLE,NEVER ISONEUNSATISFIED,
IF UNIMAGINABLE, IT MUST BEBLISS ITSELF.
THOUGH FROMACLOUDONEFEARSTHETHUNDERCLAP,
THE CROPS RIPEN WHEN FROMITPOURSTHERAIN.
THEINEFFABLE... Sarahasays: Don taskme whatitis-itis ineffable,itcannotbesaid. Itcannot be expressed. No language exists which can express it. But it can be experienced. Look at my contentment! Look how satisfied I have become! You have known me before too - how restless I was, how unsatisfied with everything. And all was available; I was your favorite, all was available to me - yet I was not satisfied. Now, look! I am standing in a cemetery ground, not even a roof over my head! And I don't live with Kings and queens; I am living with this arrowsmith woman. But look into my eyes... how contented I am. Can't you see something ineffable has happened? Can't you feel my vibe? Are you so dull and dead that you need explanations?
IFINEFFABLE,NEVER ISONEUNSATISFIED...
That is the only criterion whether a man has attained to truth or not he will never be unsatisfied. His contentment is absolute. You cannot drag him out of his contentment. You cannot make him discontented. Whatsoever happens he remains the same, contented. Success or failure, life or death,friendsorno friends,loversorno lovers-itmakesno difference. His tranquility, his stillness, is utterly absolute. He is centered.
IFINEFFABLE,NEVER ISONEUNSATISFIED...
If that which cannot be said has happened, then there is only one way to know it and that way is to see the contentment.
IF UNIMAGINABLE, ITMUST BE BLISS ITSELF...
AndIknow,hesays,youcannotimaginewhathashappenedtome. How can you imagine? because youhaveneverknownit. Imaginationisalwaysrepeatingthesamethatyouhaveknown.
You can imagine happiness; you have known bits and pieces of it. You can imagine unhappiness; you have known it, a lot of it. You can imagine happiness even if you don't know happiness - you canimagineitasthecontraryofunhappiness.Buthowcanyouimaginebliss?Youhavenotknown it. And there is nothing as contrary to it; it is not a duality. It is impossible to imagine.
So Saraha says: I can understand - you cannot imagine it - but I am not saying to imagine it. Look! It is present herenow. And if you cannot imagine it, that also is one of the criterions of truth: truth cannot be imagined. It can be seen, but not imagined. You can have a vision of it, but you cannot dream about it. And that is the difference between a dream and a vision.
Dream is yours: vision is not yours.
Christ saw God, and the scriptures say he saw the vision. Now, the psychoanalyst will say it was just a dream; he does not know the difference between a dream and a vision. A dream is YOURS; you were imagining; you created it; it was your fantasy. A vision is something out of the blue that you have never thought about not even a part of it has ever been thought by you. It is so utterly new - then it is a vision. Vision is from God; dream is from your mind.
IFUNIMAGINABLE,ITMUSTBEBLISSITSELF.
Look at me - you cannot imagine what has happened. Can't you see it... you have eyes to see. Look, watch, hold my hand! Come closer to me, just be vulnerable to me, so my vibration can vibrate your being - and the unimaginable and the ineffable can be experienced.
THOUGHFROMACLOUDONEFEARSTHETHUNDERCLAP...
And Saraha says: I know... he must have seen the king a little afraid. I see it every day: people come to me and I see them trembling, afraid, fearful, and they say, ”We are afraid, Osho.” I know! Saraha must have seen the king was trembling deep inside maybe not on the outside. He was a great king, a very disciplined man he must have been; he must have been standing erect, but deep down he must have been afraid.
ItalwayshappenswhenyouareclosebyaSaraha-likeman,oraBuddha-likeman,youarebound tobeafraid.Justtheothernightayoungmancameandhesaid,”ButwhyamIafraidofyou'?.You have not done anything wrong to me - why am I afraid of you? I love you, certainly, but why am I afraid of you?”
It is natural. When you come close to an abyss, what do you expect? You will be afraid. There is every possibility you may fall into it and will not be able to recover yourself again. It is going to be irrevocable, irrecoverable - completely, utterly gone you will be in it. You will not be able to recapitulate. Fear is natural.
Saraha says:
THOUGH FROM A CLOUD ONE FEARS THE THUNDERCLAP...
He says: I am like a cloud and you are afraid because of the thunderclap, of the lightning. But remember:
THE CROPS RIPEN WHEN FROM IT POURS THE RAIN.
But if you allow me to rain on you, the seeds will sprout, sir, and the man that is still hidden behind you, still not yet born, will be born; you will be able to ripen, to mature; you will be able to blossom. I invite you, says Saraha, for a great harvest... the harvest of consciousness, the harvest of awareness.
CHAPTER 6
I am a destroyer
26 April 1977 am in Buddha Hall
The first question:
Question 1
I HAVE TAKEN LATELY TO DAYDREAMING ABOUT ENLIGHTENMENT - EVEN MORE DELICIOUSTHAN LOVE AND FAME.
HAVE YOU ANY COMMENT TO MAKE ABOUT DAYDREAMING?
THE QUESTION IS FROM PREMPANKAJA. Daydreaming is perfectly okay as far as love and fame are concerned - they are part of a dream world. You can dream as much as you like. Love is a dream, so is fame; they are not against dreaming. In fact, when dreaming stops, they disappear. Theyexistinthesamedimension,thedimensionofdream.
But you cannot dream about Enlightenment. Enlightenment is possible only when dreaming disappears. Enlightenment is absence of dreaming - day or night, that doesn't matter. Enlightenmentmeansnowyourconsciousnessisfullyaware. Inanawareconsciousnessdreaming cannotexist.Dreamingislikedarkness.Itexistswhenthelightisnotthere.Whenthelightisthere, darkness simply cannot exist.
Dreaming exists because life is dark, dim, dismal. Dreaming exists as a substitute - because we don't have real joy, hence we dream; because we don't really have anything in life, hence we dream; otherwise, how will we be able to tolerate the emptiness that we are? how will we be able to tolerate our existence? It will be absolutely unbearable. Dreams make it bearable. Dreams help us. They say to us, ”Wait. Today things are not going right? Don't be worried: tomorrow everything will be put right. Everything HAS to be right. We will try - maybe we have not tried enough yet. Maybe we have not worked in the right direction. Maybe fate was not with us, God was against us, but it cannot be for ever.” And God is compassionate, kind; all the religions of the world say God is very kind, very compassionate. It is a hope!
Mohammedans continuously repeat: God is Rahim, Rehman - compassionate, kind. Why? For what do they repeat again and again? Each time they utter the word'God' they will repeat'the compassionate, the kind'. Why? If He is not kind then where will our hope and dreaming exist. He HAS to be kind for our dreams to exist, because THERE exists our hope: in His kindness, in His compassion. Tomorrowthingswill be okay; tomorrow they are going to be okay.
Daydreaming is good as far as love and fame are concerned, as far as outgoing energies are concerned - because outgoing, we are going in a dream. The world is a dream phenomenon; that is what Hindus mean when they call it MAYA illusion. It is made of the same stuff dreams are made of. It is a daydream seen with open eyes.
But Enlightenment is a totally different plane ofbeing. Dreams don't exist there. And ifyou continue to dream, Enlightenment will not be possible.
Just the other day I was reading a beautiful anecdote:
Aparsonhadaparrot,butdespitealleffortstotryandteachittospeakthebirdremaineddumb. The parson mentioned this one day to an elderly lady parishioner who visited him. She was interested and said, ”I also have a parrot which does not speak. It might be a good idea to put the two birds together and see what happens.”
Well, this they did, the parrots being put in a large cage while the parson and his lady parishioner withdrew out of sight but not out of hearing. At first all was quiet, then came some fluttering and the old lady's parrot was heard to exclaim, ”What about a spot of love, deary?” to which the parson's parrot replied, ”That's what I have been silently praying and waiting for for years today my dream is fulfilled. I can speak today.”
If you are waiting and praying and dreaming for love and fame, it will happen one day! It is not a difficultphenomenon. One just needsstubbornness... and ithappens. One just needs to go on and on and on... it is bound to happen, because it is YOUR dream. You will find some place or other where you can project it and you can see it, almost as if it has become a reality.
When you fall in love with a woman or a man, what are you doing exactly? You were carrying a dream inside you;nowsuddenly the woman functions as a screen -you projectyourdream on her. You start feeling, ”My dream is fulfilled.” The woman projects her dream on you; you function as a screen, and she feelsher dream isfulfilled. Ifyou go on dreaming,some day orotheryou will find a screen, somebody will become a screen, and your dream will be fulfilled.
But Enlightenment is not a dream. It is a dropping of all dreams. So please don't dream about Enlightenment. Love is possible through dreaming in fact, it is possible only through dreaming. Fame is possible through dreaming - in fact, it is only possible through dreaming, it happens ONLY
to dreamers. But Enlightenment is not possible through dreaming - the very existence of dreaming will make it impossible.
Dream for it and you will miss. Wait for it and you will miss. Hope for it and you will miss. Then what are you supposed to do? What you are supposed to do is to understand the mechanism of dreaming. You can leave Enlightenment aside; it is none of your business. You just look deep into the faculty of dreaming, understand how dreaming functions. That very understanding will bring a clarity. In that clarity dreaming stops, disappears.
When dreaming is not, Enlightenment is.
You forget about Enlightenment! You are not to even think about it - how can you think about it? And whatsoever you think is going to be wrong. How can you hope for it? - ALL hopes about it are going to be wrong. How can you desire it? It cannot be desired. Then WHAT are we supposed to do?
Try to understand desiring. Try to understand hoping. Try to understand dreaming. That's what is needed. You simply try to understand how your mind has been functioning up to now. Seeing into the functioning of the mind, mind disappears. Just a good look into the inner mechanism of the mind, and suddenly it comes to a halt. In that halt, there is Enlightenment. In that halt, there is a taste of a totally new dimension of existence.
Dreaming is one dimension: existence is another dimension. Existence is: dreaming is simply a belief.
The second question:
Question 2
YOU SPOKE IN SEVERAL RECENT DISCOURSES ON THE NO-PROBLEM, THE NON¬EXISTENCE OF OUR PROBLEMS.
HAVING BEEN BROUGHT UP IN A REPRESSIVE CATHOLIC FAMILY, AND HAVING SPENT TWENTY-ONE YEARS IN AN EQUALLY CRAZY EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM - ARE YOU SAYING THAT ALL THE COATS OF ARMOUR, ALL THE CONDITIONINGS AND ALL THE REPRESSIONS DO NOT EXIST, CAN BE DROPPED IMMEDIATELY - NOW?
WHAT ABOUT ALL THE IMPRINTS LEFT ON THE BRAIN, ON THE MUSCULATURE OF THE BODY?
THIS IS A VERY SIGNIFICANT QUESTION - it is from Jayananda. The question is significant because it shows two different approaches concerning the inner reality of man.
TheWestern approach is to think about the problem, tofind thecausesoftheproblem, togointothe history of the problem, into the past of the problem, to uproot the problem from the very beginning, to uncondition the mind, or to recondition the mind, to recondition the body, to take out all those imprints that have been left on the brain - this is the Western approach. Psychoanalysis goes into the memory; it works there. It goes into your childhood, into your past; it moves backwards. It finds out from where the problem has arisen - maybe fifty years before when you were a child the problem arose in your relationship with your mother, then psychoanalysis will go back.
Fifty years of history! It is a very long, dragging affair. And even then it doesn't help much - because there are MILLIONS of problems. It is not only a question of one problem. You can go into one problem's history; you can look into your autobiography and find out the causes. Maybe you can eliminate one problem, but there are millions of problems. If you start going into each problem..to solveonelife'sproblemsyouwillneed millionsoflives. Letmerepeatit: tosolveONElife'sproblems you will have to be born again and again, millions of times. This is almost impractical. This cannot be done. And all those millions of lives when you will be solving the problems of this life, those lives will create their own problems... and so on and so forth. You will be dragged more and more into the problems. This is absurd!
Now, the same psychoanalytical approach has gone into the body: rolfing, bio-energetics, and other methods are there which try to eliminate imprints on the body, in the musculature. Again, you have to go into the history of the body. But one thing is certain about both the approaches, which are on the same logical pattern, that the problem comes from the past, so somehow it has to be tackled in the past.
Man's mind has always been trying to do two impossible things. One is: to reform the past - which cannot be done. The past has happened. You cannot REALLY go into the past. When you think of going into the past, at the most you go into the memory of it; it is not the real past, it is just the memory. The past is no more there, so you cannot reform it. This is one of the impossible goals of humanity; man has suffered very much because of it. You want to undo the past - how can you undoit?Thepastisabsolute.Thepastmeans: allpotentialityofitisfinished;ithasbecomeactual. Now there is no longer any potentiality to reform it, to undo it, to redo it. You cannot do ANYthing with the past.
And the second impossible idea that has always dominated the human mind is: to establish the future - which cannot be done again. Future means that which is not yet; you cannot establish it. Future remains unestablished. Future remains open. Future is pure potentiality! Unless it happens, you cannot be certain about it.
Past is pure actuality - it has happened. Now nothing can be done about it.
Between these two, man stands in the present always thinking of the impossibles. Hewantstomake everything certain about the future, about tomorrow - which canNOT be done. Let it sink as deeply inyourheartaspossible:itcannotbedone. Don't waste your present moment for making the future certain. The future is uncertainty; that is the very quality of the future. And don't waste your time looking back. The past has happened, it is a dead phenomenon. Nothing can be done about it. What, at the most, you can do is you can reinterpret it. That's all. That's what psychoanalysis is doing: reinterpreting it. Reinterpretation can be done - but the past remains the same.
Psychoanalysis and astrology: astrology tries somehow to make the future certain, and psychoanalysis tries to redo the past. Neither is a science. Both things are impossible, but both havemillionsoffollowers-becausemanLIKESitthatway.Hewantstobecertainaboutthefuture, so he goes to the astrologer, he consults the I CHING, he goes to a Tarot reader, and there are a thousand and one ways to fool oneself, to deceive oneself.
And then there are people who say they can change the past - he consults them also.
Once these two things are dropped, you become free of all sorts of foolishnesses. Then you don't go to the psychoanalyst and you don't go to the astrologer. Then you know the past is finished... you also be finished with it. And the future has not happened; whenever it happens, we will see - nothing can be done about it right now. You can only destroy the present moment, which is the only moment available, real.
The West has been continuously looking into the problems, how to solve them. The West takes the problems very seriously. And when you are going in a certain logic, given the premises, that logic looks perfect.
I was just reading one anecdote:
A great philosopher and world renowned mathematician is aboard an aeroplane. He is sitting in his seat and thinking great mathematical problems, when suddenly an announcement comes from the captain: ”I am sorry, there will be a a slight delay. Engine number one has cut out and we are now flying on three engines.”
About ten minutes later another announcement: ”I am afraid there will be further delay - engines two and three have cut out and there is only number four left.”
So the philosopherturns to the fellowsittingnextto him and says, ”Good golly! Ifthe otherone cuts out we will be up here all night!”
When you are thinking in a certain line, the very direction of it makes certain things possible, absurd things also possible. Once you have taken human problems very seriously, once you start thinking about man as a problem, you have accepted some premise you have taken the first step wrongly. Nowyou cangointothedirection, andyoucan goon and on. Nowsuchgreatliteraturehascomeup in this century about mind phenomena, psychoanalysis; millions of papers are written and treatises and books. Once Freud opened the doors of a certain logic, it dominated the whole century.
The East has a totally different outlook. First, it says no problem is serious. The moment you say no problem is serious, the problem is almost ninety-nine percent dead. Your whole vision changes about it. The second thing the East says is: the problem is there because you are identified with it. Ithas nothingto do with the past, nothingto do with its history. You are identified with it-thatisthe REAL thing. And that is the key to solve all problems.
For example: you are an angry person. If you go to the psychoanalyst, he will say, ”Go into the past... how did this anger arise? In what situations did it become more and more conditioned and imprinted on your mind? We will have to wash out all those imprints; we will have to wipe them off. We will have to clean your past completely.”
If you go to an Eastern mystic, he will say, ”You think that you are anger, you feel identified with the anger - that is where things are going wrong. Next time anger happens, you just be a watcher, you just be a witness. You don't get identified with the anger. Don't say,'I am anger.' Don't say,'I am angry.' Just see it happening as if it is happening on a TV screen. Look at yourself as if you are looking at somebody else.”
You are pure consciousness. When the cloud of anger comes around you, just watch it, AND remain alertsothatyou don't get identified. Thewholething is how not to become identified with the problem. Once you have learnt it... and then there is no question of'so manyproblems' -because the key, the same key will open all the locks. It is so with anger, it is so with greed, it is so with sex: it is so with everything else that the mind is capable of.
The East says: Just remain unidentified. Remember - that's what Gurdjieff means when he says'self-remembering'. Remember that you are a witness! Be mindful! - that's what Buddha says. Be alert that a cloud is passing by! Maybe the cloud comes from the past, but that is meaningless. It must have a certain past, it cannot come just out of the blue; it must be coming from a certain sequence of events - but that is irrelevant. Why be bothered about it? RIGHT NOW, this very moment, you can become detached from it, you can cut yourself away from it. The bridge can be broken right now - and it can be broken ONLY in the now.
Going into the past won't help. Thirty years before, the anger arose and you got identified with it that day. Nowyou cannot get unidentified from thatpast;itisnomorethere. Butyou can getunidentified thismoment, thisverymoment. And then the WHOLEseriesofangers ofyourpastis no more part of you.
THE QUESTION IS RELEVANT. Jayananda has asked:”You spoke in several recent discourses on theno-problem, the non-existence of our problems. Having beenbroughtupin arepressiveCatholic family...”
You can, right now, become a non-Catholic. NOW! I say. You will not have to go back and undo whatsoever your parents and your society and the priest and the church have done. That will be a sheer wastage of precious present time. In the first place it has destroyed many years; now, again, itwill be destroying yourpresentmoments. You can simplydropoutofit, justasasnake slipsoutof the old skin.
”Having been brought up in a repressive Catholic family, and having spent twenty-one years in an equally crazy educational system - are you saying that all the coats of armour, all the conditionings and all the repressions do not exist...?”
No, theyexist. Buttheyexisteitherinthebodyorinthebrain;theydon'texistin yourconsciousness, because the consciousness cannot be conditioned. Consciousness REMAINS free! Freedom is its innermost quality, freedom is its nature. In fact, even asking it, you are showing that freedom.
Whenyousay”twenty-oneyearsinacrazyeducationalsystem”;whenyousay”havingbeenbrought up in a repressive Catholic family” - in THIS moment you are not identified. You can look: so many years of Catholic repression, so many years of a certain education. In this moment when you are looking at it, this consciousness is no longer Catholic; otherwise, who will be aware? If you had really BECOME Catholic, then who would be aware? Then there would be no possibility of becoming aware.
If you can say ”twenty-one years in an equally crazy educational system,” one thing is certain: you are not yet crazy. The system has failed; it didn't work. Jayananda, you are not crazy, hence you can see the whole system as crazy. A madman cannot see that he is mad. Only a sane person can see that this is madness. To see madness as madness, sanity is needed. Those twenty-one years of crazy system have failed; all that repressive conditioning has failed. It CANNOT really succeed. It succeeds only in the proportion that you get identified with it. Any moment you can stand aloof... it is there, I am not saying it is not there: but it is no more part of your consciousness.
This is the beauty of consciousness: consciousness can slip out of anything. There is no barrier to it,no boundary to it. Justamomentbefore you were an Englishman - understanding the nonsense ofnationalism,asecond lateryou areno longeran Englishman. Iam notsaying thatyourwhiteskin will change; it will remain white -butyou arenomoreidentified with thewhiteness;you areno more against the black. You seethestupidityofit. Iam notsaying thatjustbyseeing thatyou arenomore an Englishman you willforgetthe English language,no. It will still be there in yourmemory,butyour consciousness has slipped out, your consciousness is standing on a hillock looking at the valley. Now, the Englishman is dead in the valley and you are standing on the hills, far away, unattached, untouched.
The whole Eastern methodology can be reduced to one word: witnessing. And the whole Western methodology can be be Reduced to one thing: analyzing. Analyzing, you go round and round. Witnessing, you simply get out of the circle.
Analysis is a vicious circle. If you REALLY go into analysis, you will be simply puzzled - how is it possible? If, for example, you try to go into the past, where will you end? Where exactly? If you go into the past, where did your sexuality start? When you were fourteen years of age? But then it came out of the blue? It must have been getting ready in the body. So when? When you were born? But then when you were in the mother's womb, wasn't it getting ready? Then when? The moment you were conceived? But before that? Half of your sexuality was mature in your mother's egg and half of the sexuality was maturing in your father's sperm. Now go on..where will you end? You will have to go to Adam and Eve. And even then it does not end: you will have to go to Father God Himself. Why in the first place did He create Adam?...
Analysis will always remain half, so analysis never helps anybody really. It cannot help. It makes you a little more adjusted to your reality, that's all. It is a sort of adjustment. It helps you to attain a little bit of understanding about your problems, their genesis, how they have arisen. And that little intellectual understanding helps you to adjust to the society better, but you remain the same person. There is no transformation through it,there is no radicalchange through it.
Witnessing is a revolution. It is a radical change - from the VERY roots! It brings a totally new man into existence, because it takes your consciousness out of all the conditionings. Conditionings are therein thebodyandin themind,butconsciousnessremainsunconditioned. Itispure,alwayspure. It is virgin. Its virginity cannot be violated.
The Eastern approach is to make you mindful of this virgin consciousness, of this purity, of this innocence. That's what Saraha is saying to the king again and again. Our emphasis is on the sky and the Western emphasis is on the clouds. Clouds have a genesis;ifyou find outfrom where they come,you will have to gototheocean,then tothesunraysand the evaporation ofthe waterand the
clouds forming... and you can go on, but it will be moving in a circle. The clouds form, then again they come, fall in love with the trees, start pouring again into the earth, become rivers, go to the ocean, start evaporating, rising again on sunrays, become clouds, again fall on the earth It goes
on and on, round and round and round. It is a wheel. From where will you be out? One thing will lead to another and you will be in the wheel.
The sky has no genesis. The sky is uncreated; it is not produced by anything. In fact, for anything to be, a sky is needed as a must, a priori; it has to exist before anything else can exist. You can ask the Christian theologian - he says ”God created the world.” Ask him whether before He created the world there was any sky or not. If there was no sky, where did God used to exist? He must have needed space. If there was no space, where did He create the world? where did He put the world? Space is a must... even for God to exist. You cannot say ”God created space.” That would be absurd, because then He would not have any space to exist. Space must precede God.
Sky has always been there. The Eastern approach is to become mindful of the sky. The Western approach makes you more and more alert to the clouds, and helps you a little, but it doesn't make you aware of your innermost core. Circumference - yes, you become a little more aware of the circumference, but not aware of the center. And the circumference is a cyclone. You have to find the center of the cyclone. And that happens only through witnessing.
Witnessing will not change your conditioning. Witnessing will not change your body musculature. But witnessing will simply give you an experience that you are beyond all musculature, all conditioning. Inthatmomentofbeyondness,inthatmomentoftranscendence,noproblemexists-notforyou.
And now it is up to you. The body will still carry the musculature and the mind will still carry the conditioning - now it is up to you: if sometimes you are hankering for the problem, you can get into the mindbody and have the problem and enjoy it. If you don't want to have it, you can remain out. The problem will remain as an imprint in the bodymind phenomenon, but you will be aloof and away from it.
That's how a Buddha functions. You also use memory; a Buddha also uses memory - but he is not identified with it. He uses memory as a mechanism. For example, I am using language. When I have to use language, I use the mind and all the imprints, but continuously I am not the mind - that awareness is there. So I remain the boss, the mind remains a servant. When the mind is called, it comes; its utility is there - but it cannot dominate.
So your question is right: problems WILL exist, but they will exist only in the seed form in the body and the mind. How can you change your past? You have been a Catholic in the past; if for forty yearsyouhavebeenaCatholic,howcanyouchangethosefortyyearsandNOTbeaCatholic? No. Those forty years will remain as a period of being Catholic. No - but you can slip out of it. Now you know that that was just identification. Those forty years cannot be destroyed, and there is no need to destroy them. If you are the master of the house, there is no need. You can use even those forty years in a certain way, in a creative way. Even that crazy education can be used in a creative way.
”What about all the imprints left on the brain, on the musculature of the body?”
They will be there, but as a seed: potentially there. If you feel too lonely and you want problems, you can have them. If you feel too miserable without misery, you can have them. They will remain always available, but there is no need to have them, there is no necessity to have them. It will be your choice.
The future humanity will have to decide whether it has to go on the path of analysis or it has to change to the path of witnessing. I use both methods. I use analysis, particularly for seekers who come from the West - I put them in the groups. Those groups are analytical, those groups are by-products of psychoanalysis. They have grown: Freud will not be able to recognize encounter if hecomes;orprimal therapywill bedifficultforhim to recognize - what is happening? Haveall these people gone mad? Buttheyare offshoots of HIS work; he was the pioneer;withouthim there would be no primal therapy. He started the whole game.
When Western people come to me, I put them into the groups. That is good for them. They should start with what is easier for them. Then by and by, slowly I change. First they go into cathartic groups like encounter, primal therapy, and then I start putting them into intensive enlightenment, then vipassana. Vipassana is a witnessing. From encounter to vipassana there is a great synthesis. When you move from encounter to vipassana, you are moving from West to East.
The third question:
Question 3
DO YOUR ACTIONS ALSO BRING THE SAME PROPORTION OF GOOD AND BAD IN THE WORLD?
WHAT ACTIONS? Can you detect any actions in me... except talking? And in that too I take every careto contradict everything I say. Soin. the end, just emptiness Thatistheuseofcontradiction.
IfI say plus one, IMMEDIATELY I say minus one -andthe total resultis zero.
I am not a doer. I don't do anything. All that you can call action is my talking to you. And that is so contradictory that it cannot bring either good or bad. I go on negating myself. And if you understand thisstateofno-action,youwillhaveunderstoodthehighestpossibilityofconsciousness. Thehighest consciousnessisnotadoer. Itisabeing. And if something like action appearsthere, itisjustplayful. My talking is just a play.
And the whole effort is that you don't become dogmatic about me. You cannot become - I don't allow that possibility. I contradict so much: how can you create a dogma? If you try to create a dogma, immediately you will findI have contradicted it.
A Christian missionaryusedtocometo seeme, andhe said, ”You havespoken somuch. Nowwhat is needed is a small book which introduces your philosophy - something like a Christian catechism, in short.”
I said, ”Thatwill be difficult. Ifsomebodyis going to putme In short', he will go mad. Andhe will not find any way to choose and what to choose. Once I am gone, many people are going to become insane working on their Ph.D. theses on me - because I have said all that can be said, and I have denied all that can be denied.
The fourth question:
Question 4
A QUESTION IN BAD FAITH - WHY DO YOU TALK SO MUCH AGAINST THE EGO? ISN'T THE EGO ALSO A MANIFESTATION OF GOD, A GAME PLAYED BY EXISTENCE?
IFYOUUNDERSTANDTHAT,then thereisno problem about the ego. Thatisthe whole purpose of why I go on talking against the ego so that you are not and God is. If you have come to such a deep understanding, that the ego is also God's play, then it is perfectly good! Then there is no problem. Then there is no need to drop because you have nothing to drop.
Ifyou understand that ego is also God'splay,then you arenotin it. Everything isGod's-that'swhat egolessness means - even ego.
But beware! You may be just playing a trick upon yourself, and mind is very cunning. In the name of God you may be trying to save your ego. It is up to you! But be watchful. If you have REALLY understood that all is God's, then you are not.
So where is the ego? What does ego mean? It means: I have a private life; I am not part of the universal flux. I am not part of the river - I am swimming, I am going upstream; I have my own private goals. Idon'tcarewheretheexistence isgoing;Ihave myown private goals,and Iam trying to find them and achieve them Ego meanshaving aprivate goal. Ego is idiotic.
The word idiot' is very beautiful. It means having a private idiom. It means having a private goal, a private style. Ego is idiotic. It simply says that ”I am not part of the universal: I am private, I am separate. I am an island, I don't belong to the continent.” This not belonging to the whole is what ego is, this idea of being separate.
That's why all the mystics have been saying: Drop the ego. What are they saying'? They are saying: Don't be separate. Dropping the ego does not mean anything else: don't be separate - be together with existence. And don't flow against the river - that is foolish; you will be simply tired and defeated. Go with the river! All the way, go with the river. You are part of the river. And then there will be relaxation and rest and joy.
With the river there is joy. Against the river there is strain, anxiety. Ego creates anxiety and strain.
Now, you ask: ”Why do you talk so much against the ego'? Isn't the ego also a manifestation of God, a game played by existence?”
If you have come to understand that, then to you at least I am not saying to drop the ego; then you don't have any ego to drop. But be very careful and cautious. Mind is so cunning. I have heard this small anecdote:
A monkey and a hyena were walking through the jungle together when the hyena said, ”Every time I go through those bushes over there a big lion jumps out and keeps on hitting me and hitting me, and I don't know why!”
”Well,Iwill come with you thistime,”said the monkey,”and Iwill stickupforyou.”
So they walked along together, and just as they got to the bushes a lion jumped out on them and started hitting the hyena. The monkey just climbed up in a tree and watched, so when the lion had gonethehalfdeadhyenaaskedthemonkey,”Whydidn'tyoucomedownandhelpme?”
And the monkey said, ”You were laughing so much I thought you were winning.”
Beware of the ego! It can find ways and means to protect itself. It can rationalize well; the ego is a great rationalist, and a rationalization is its whole foundation.
The fifth question:
Question 5
BELOVED OSHO, PLEASE SAY THIS TO ME SO I CAN STOP WORRYING ABOUT IT-
”ARUP, EVERYTHING IS GOING ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFULLY WITH YOU. NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOUR MIND IS TRYING, NOW IT IS TOO LATE. I HAVE GOT YOU SAFELY UNDER MY WING AND THERE IS NO WAY BACK. AND YOU ARE GOING TO BE MORE AND MORE BLISSFUL FROM NOW ON.”
THANK YOU OSHO. I HOPE IT IS SO, BUT SOMETIMES I WAVER.
THE QUESTION IS FROM ARUP. Now, the first thing: you say that I have to say to you, ”Everything is going absolutely beautifully with you.”
Just by my saying it, it will not become beautiful. It may give you a consolation, but I am not here to give you any consolation. Either take the real thing or don't bother at all. Consolation is a false thing. It is a toy to play with; it is just to pass time. And passing time is wasting time.
And, another thing, you say, ”Everything is going absolutely beautifully” - difficult. ”Absolutely beautifully” - difficult. Nothing is absolute here on the earth... except witnessing. Ugly is not absolute, beautiful is not absolute. Happiness is not absolute, unhappiness is not absolute. Only witnessing. And when you witness, you neither feel ugly nor beautiful, neither happy, nor unhappy - you simply feel a witness.
My whole work is to make you a witness. You would like to have everything beautiful - you don't want to be a witness. You want to have more pleasurable experiences. That's why you constantly seek consolation. People come to me not really to be helped but to be consoled, just to be patted on the back. If I say everything is going good, they feel good, but how long is this feeling going to help? It will wear off sooner or later. Again they have to come, and again they wait for me to pat them on the head. This is not going to help you. You need a transformation. And this will create a dependenceonme,andIamnottomakeyoudependentonme-youhavetobeindependent,you have to be your own self, you have to be on your own.
”No matter how much your mind is trying, now it is too late.”
It is never too late! You can again slip into the old skin, you can again become identified with it. And when it is REALLY too late, then you will not ask this question. Then you will know that now there is no possibility of going back. This will be a certainty in you. This will be your own knowing. You will not need my certificate for it. Just because you need a certificate, it shows it has not happened - you are wavering.
I have heard:
Mulla Nasrudin was standing in the court. ”This crime was the work of a master criminal,” said the prosecutor, ”and was carried out in a skillful, clever manner.”
Blushing, Mulla Nasrudin, the defendant, rose to his feet and said, ”Sir, flattery will get you nowhere - I ain't gonna confess.”
But he has confessed. Arup has confessed - this is not a question, this is a confession - that she feels worried isnatural. Itisinhuman to expectno worry, at this stage atleast. Sometimesshefeels wavering; that is human, natural. It is good to accept it, rather than deny it, rather than create a screen and hide it. ”Please say this to me so that I can stop worrying about it.”
How will you stop worrying about it? - just by my saying it? If it were so easy, I would have said it to everybody. It is not so easy. Whatsoever I say, you will interpret it in your own way, and you will find new worries. Whatsoever I say, you will have to interpret it - you cannot accept it totally, you cannot trust it totally. And I am not saying that you HAVE to trust it totally; I am saying this is simplynatural. I don't ask any unnatural thingfrom you. I don'taskanyabsurd things from you. Itis natural! Sometimes you waver, sometimes you are against me, sometimes you are very negative. Sometimes you feel just to drop everything and go away back to your old world. I don't say that you are doing something criminal - no - it is just human. It is very natural. If you are not doing such things, then somethingis wrong, then something is amiss.
Whatsoever I say will again be interpreted by the same worrying mind. Even if I say exactly: Yes, Arup, everything is going absolutely beautifully with you... you will think, ”Was Osho joking? Does he really mean it?” The worrying mind will jump upon it. Your interpretations are bound to be there.
Listen to this small story:
A priest was returning home late at night from a meeting. As he drove along, he suddenly remembered that he had not said evensong. He pulled up at the side of a quiet country lane, got out of his car and using the light of his car headlamps began to say the office.
Not long after he had begun, and much to his surprise, a lorry came along. The driver of the lorry, thinking that something was wrong, stopped, let down his window, and asked, ”Having a spot of trouble, mate?”
”No, everything is alright, thank you,” replied the priest.
The driver put his lorry in gear and, not to be outdone as he pulled away, cried out, ”All I can say is: that must be a helluva good book you are reading there!”
Now just think of somebody reading a book on a lonely lane by the headlights of the car - what will you think? Can you imagine somebody reading the Bible? What is the hurry to read the Bible? Can somebody be so interested in reading the Bible? Can't he wait and go home and read it there? The lorry-driver must have interpreted according to his mind - he said, ”All I can say is: that must be a helluva good book you are reading there!”
You continuously interpret. And you interpret, naturally, according to your mind. What I say will not be heard; you will hear it in your own way. If you are worrying, you will worry about it. If you are doubting, you will doubt about it. If you are negative, you will be negative about it. If you are trusting, you will trust.
Arup says, ”Just say to me so that I can stop worrying about it.” No, worrying cannot be stopped that easy. My saying it will not help you will have to do something. You will have to do what I say. You will have to be a little more practical. You will have to do witnessing.
There were three very hungry tramps, and they came to the house where the governor was cooking rice, and he said to them that they could stay the night and whoever had the best dream could have some hot rice.
So the nextmorning the firsttrampsaid, ”IdreamtthatIwas the king.”
The second tramp said, ”That's nothing - I dreamt I was God Himself.”
And the third tramp said, ”My dream was very ordinary and I don't stand a chance of winning at all: I dreamt about that hot rice getting cold, so I went down and ate it.”
ThisiswhatImean bybeing practical. So, Arup, bepractical! DowhatIsay-justmysaying itwon't help... and the rice is reallygetting cold. You wantme to help create adream in you, and the rice is getting cold. You just go down and eat the rice!
This will just give you a dream if I say: ”Arup, everything is going absolutely beautifully with you. No matter how much your mind is trying, now it is too late. I have got you safely under my wing and there is no way back.”
In the first place I cannot say it because the very desire to be safe and secure is against spiritual growth. I am pushing you into a dangerous realm. I am pushing you into an abyss. You would like to be safely under my wings - now, I am throwing you into the very turmoil of existence... with no safety, with nosecurity. Iam notaprotector-Iam adestroyer. Iam not your security. If you REALLY understand me, I am going to become your dangerous life.
You will always be insecure if you have understood me. You will never ask for safety and security. You will abhorsafetyand security. You will thinkofthem asenemies -theyare. You will enjoybeing in the Open, vulnerable to all that is possible in life. Yes, vulnerable to death too;'all' includes death too. A REAL life is encountering death each moment. Only unreal, plastic lives are safe.
No, I cannot say that, that I have got you safely under my wing and there is no way back. You can fall, you can fall from the very last rung. Unless you become Enlightened, there is a way back; you can go back. You can deny, you can betray, you can reject. You can fall into the misery again -from the very last rung also you can fall. Until and unless you have crossed the whole ladder, even the last rung, until and unless you arejustanobody,you can fallback. A slight ego, just a tremor of ego, is enough to bring you back. It can again condense, it can again integrate, it can again become a new trip.
And safety is not my way. To be a sannyasin means you are ready to live life without safety. That is the greatest courage, and with that great courage, great bliss becomes possible.
”And you are going to be more and more and more blissful from now on.”
I am not an Emile Coue - I am not a hypnotist. Yes, you can hypnotize yourself this way. That was the very methodology of Coue. He would tell his patients, ”Think, dream, imagine, visualize - each night before going to sleep, each morning after the sleep, repeat again and again and again'I am getting better,Iam getting healthier,Iam getting happier ' Repeat,go on repeating.”
Yes, it helps a little. It creates an illusion around you. But would you like me to help you in creating illusions? My whole approach is that of dehypnosis; it is not of hypnosis at all. I don't want you to be hypnotized by any illusion. I want you to be utterly dehypnotized of all illusions. When you are in a state of disillusionment, utter disillusionment, Enlightenment is very close by.
Then Arup says, ”Thank you Osho. I hope it is so...”
See! Her mind has already started interpreting.. ”IHOPE itis so...” It is not so -she simply hopes. Howyou can deceive yourself!
”I hope it is so, but sometimes I waver.”
And I am not condemning your wavering - it is perfectly okay to waver sometimes, it is perfectly human to waver sometimes. It is perfectly right! Never condemn it! Accept it! Don't try to create a false unwavering - that will be of the mind and will be a deception, and will not lead you anywhere. Let it be as it is. Accept it as it is, and become more and more watchful, become more and more of a witness. Only in that witnessing will you be safe. Only in that witnessing will you become more and more blissful every day - not by repeating it! Only in that witnessing will you stop wavering. Only in that witnessing will you come to the center of your being - where death exists not, where only life abundant is, where one is drinking the nectar Saraha talks about.
The sixth question:
Question 7
WHAT IS IT EXACTLY THAT IS OBSTRUCTING MY VISION FROM SEEING THE OBVIOUS? I JUST DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT TO DO AND WHAT NOT TO DO. WHEN WILL I BE ABLE TOHEAR THESOUND OFSILENCE?
”What is it exactly that is obstructing my vision from seeing the obvious?”
THE VERY DESIRE TO SEE IT. The obviouscannotbedesired. The obviousis! You desire: you go away. You startseeking forit: in thatverymomentyou have made itdistant,itisno more obvious,it is no more close by; you have put it far away. How can you seek the obvious? If you understand it is obvious, how can you seek it? It is just there! What is the need to seek it and to desire it?
The obvious is the divine. The mundane is the sublime. And the trivial is profound. In your day-to- day, ordinary activities, you are meeting God every moment of it - because there is nobody else. You cannot meet anybody else; it is always God in a thousand and one forms. GOD IS VERY OBVIOUS. Only God is! But you seek, you desire... andyoumiss. InyourveryseekingyouputGod very distant, far away. That is an ego trick. Try to understand it.
The ego is not interested in the obvious, because the ego cannot exist with the obvious. The ego is NOT interested at all in the close-by. The ego is interested in the distant, faraway. Just think: man has reached to the moon, and man has not reached to his own heart yet... the distant. Man has invented space travel, but still he has not developed soul travel. He has reached Everest, but he does not bother to go into his own being. The close-by is missed and the faraway is sought. Why?
The ego feels good - if the journey is hard the ego feels good. There is something to prove. If it is difficult, there is something to prove. Togotothemoon,theegofeelsgood,buttogointoone'sown being will not be much of a claim.
There is an old story:
God created the world; then He used to live on the earth. You can imagine: His troubles were too many. Everybody was complaining; everybody was knocking at odd hours. In the night people would come and they would say, ”This is wrong, and today we need rain and it is so hot.” And somebody would come just afterwards and he would say, ”Don't bring rains - I am doing something and it will spoil everything.” And God was getting almost mad: ”What to do?! So many people, so many desires, and everybody expecting and everybody needs fulfillment, and their desires are so contradictory. The farmer wants the rain and the potter wants no rain, because he has made pots and they will be destroyed; he needs hot sun for a few days” - and so on and so forth
The God called His council and asked: ”What to do? - they will drive me crazy. And I cannot satisfy themall. Ortheywillmurdermesomeday!Iwouldlikesomeplacetohide.”
And they suggested many things. Somebody said, ”That is not a problem - you just go to Everest. That is the highest peak in the Himalayas; nobody will ever reach there.”
God said, ”You don't know! Just after a few seconds” - for God that is just after a few seconds - ”Edmund Hillary will reach there with Tensing, and then the trouble will start. And once they know, then they will start coming in helicopters and buses, and everything will No, that won't do. It will
solve things for a few seconds.” Remember, God's time has a different way. In India we say millions of years is one day of God - so a few seconds.
Thensomebodysuggested,”Andwhynotthemoon?”
Hesaid,”Thattooisnotveryfar-afewsecondsmoreandsomebodywillreachthemoon.”
And they suggested faraway stars, but God said, ”That is not going to solve the problem. It's simply a sort of postponement. I want a permanent solution.”
Then an old servant of God came close, whispered something in His ear, and God said, ”You are right. That will do!”
And the old servant had said, ”There is only one place where man will never reach - you hide in man himself.” And that is the place where God has been hiding since then: in man himself. That is the last thing man will ever think.
Theobviousisthemissed, because ego is not interested. Egoisinterestedinhard, difficult, arduous things, because there is a challenge. When you win, you can claim. If the obvious is there and you win, what sort of victory is this? You are not much of a winner. That's why man goes on missing the obvious and goes on seeking the distant.
And how can you seek the distant when you cannot even seek the obvious?
”What is it exactly that is obstructing my vision from seeing the obvious?”
The very desire is taking you astray. Drop the desire and you will see the obvious.
”I just do not understand what to do and what not to do.”
You are not to do anything. You have just to be watchful of all that is happening around you. Doing is again an ego-trip. Doing, ego feels good - something is there to do. Doing is a food for the ego; it strengthens the ego. Non-doing, andego falls flaton the ground. Itdies. Itis no more nourished.
So just be a non-doer. Don't do anything as far as God, truth, and the search for it is concerned. It is not a search in the first place, so you cannot do anything about it. You just be. Let me say it in another way: if you are in a state of being, God comes to you. Man can never find Him; He finds man. Just be in a silent space, not doing anything, not going anywhere, not dreaming - and in that silent space suddenly you will find He is there. He has always been there! Just you were not silent, so you couldn't see Him, you could not hear His still, small voice.
”When will I be able to hear the sound of silence?”
When? - you ask a wrong question. Now or never. Hear it now! because it is there, the music is on, the music is all over. Just you need to be silent so that you can hear it. But never say 'when'; 'when' means you have brought future in; 'when' means you have started dreaming; 'when' means notnow... and it is always now. Itisalwaysnow-time. ForGodthere isonlyone time: now;andonly one place: here. 'There', 'then' - drop them.
And the last question:
Question 8
OSHO, DO YOU EVER FEELATA LOSS WITH WORDS?
THE QUESTION IS FROM RISHI. Each time I utter a word, I feel at a loss - because that which I want to say cannot be said. And that which has to be conveyed, cannot be conveyed. Then you will naturally ask, why do I go on speaking?
Iam trying hard. Maybe today Ihave failed... tomorrow. Yesterday Ifailed... today. Igo on speaking in different ways: maybe this way you have not heard; in some other way maybe it will be closer to you. This way somebody has heard; you have not heard. In another way maybe you will be able to hear it. But I am at a loss continuously. Words don't come easily - because the message is wordless. I am not a priest; I am not trying to give you some dogma; I am not trying to explain some theory to you. Something has happened in me, something has happened to me - I am trying to convey THAT. Iam trying to commune with you.
Words are very awkward. They are very tiny and very small. They cannot contain that which I want them to contain. So EACH momentIam ataloss. Peoplewhodon'thave anyexperienceare never at a loss; any word will do.
I have heard a beautiful story - meditate over it:
A parish priest was having a few words with his Bishop, and in the course of conversation said, ”It is alright for you, my lord, when you prepare a sermon you can deliver it to several churches in the diocese, but I have to give two new sermons every Sunday.”
The Bishop replied, ”You should be able to give a sermon on almost any subject at a moment's notice as I can.”
”I will take you up on that,” said the parson. ”You come to my church next Sunday and I will put you to the test.”
Thebishopagreedandinduecoursewenttothepulpittofindacard withtheoneword 'constipation' written on it - that was the subject. Without hesitation, he started: ”And Moses took two tablets and went out on to the mountainside.”
A priestisneverata loss. He hasso many scriptures available, he can alwaysfind something from his memory. I am continuously at a loss - because what I want to say to you is not a subject matter: it is my subjectivity. What I WANT to say to you is my heart! it is not my mind. Unfortunately, I have to use the mind because there isno otherway. Even to convey the heartone hasto use the mind - hence the absurdity of it. It is very irrational. It is trying to do the impossible! But there is no other way... I am helpless.
But if you ask: Am I ever at a loss for words? I am constantly. Each single word, and I hesitate: will itdo? Howcan itdo? Knowing itisnotgoing to help,Igo on using it. Itisa necessary evil. Silence would be better, far better, but when I LOOK at you then I hesitate. If I become silent, it will be even more difficult for you to come closer to me. You cannot understand the words, how will you be able to understand the silence? And if you can understand silence, you will be able to hear that silence in my words too.
If I become silent, then at the most five percent of you will be around me. Those five percent can understand through the words too, because they are listening to my silence not to my words. So there is no problem for those five percent. But the other ninety-five percent who cannot understand words and cannot understand the silence contained in them will be simply lost. I will not be able to help them at all. Through my words, they at least go on hanging around.
In their hanging around there is a possibility that in some unguarded moment they may have a contact with me, some unguarded moment and in spite of themselves they may come closer to me, they may stumble upon me; some unguarded moment, and I may penetrate into their heart, something may be stirred. It is a perhaps, but it is worth going on.
That five percent will be helped either way, but this ninety-five percent will not be helped by silence. And that five percent also, if I had been silent from the very beginning, would not be here. That five percent shows the way, so that the ninety-five percent by and by will be ninety percent, eighty-five percent, eighty percent
The day I feel at least fifty percent of people can understand silence, then words can be dropped. I am not very happy about them. Nobody ever was: neither was Lao Tzu, nor was Saraha, nor was Buddha - nobody ever was. But they all had to use words, not because silence cannot be a communion-silencecanbeacommunion,butforthataveryhigherconsciousnessisneeded.
Once it happened:
Two great mystics of India, Kabir and Farid, met, and for two days sat silently together. Thedisciples were very much frustrated: they wanted them to talk, they wanted them to talk so that they could hear something valuable. They were hoping, for months they were hoping, that Kabir and Farid would meet, and there would be a great showering, and they would enjoy it. But they were just sitting silently, and the disciples were dozing, yawning - what to do? And what happened to these two people? - because they were never silent before. Kabir was never silent with his disciples and neither was Farid silent with his disciples: they were continuously hammering on their disciples. ”Why? What has happened? Have they gone dumb?” But they could not say anything; it was not appropriate.
After two days, when Kabir and Farid hugged each other and said goodbye - that too in silence - and when the disciples were left with their Masters, they jumped upon their Masters. And the followers of Kabir said, ”What went wrong? And for months we have been waiting for Farid to come, and he came, and you never spoke a single word. And we were waiting and waiting... we got tired! These two days have been hell!”
And Kabir laughed. He said, ”But there was nothing to say - he can understand silence. If I had said anything, he would have thought me ignorant - because when silence is there and silence can say it, what is the use of words?”
And the followers of Farid asked Farid, ”What happened? Why didn't you speak?”
Farid said, ”Are you mad? Speaking with Kabir? We are exactly at the same space, so there is nothing to convey, nothing to say! The moment I looked into his eyes and he looked into my eyes, we recognized. The dialogue finished at the first moment!”
”Then for two days... what were you doing for two days?”
And Farid said, ”We were just enjoying each other - each other's space. We were guests to each other. We overlapped each other, we overflowed each other, we mingled with each other - we danced, we sang. But it all happened in silence. When silence can speak, what is the need of language?”
I am continuously at a loss for words. Each word I utter very hesitatingly, knowing well that it is not going to suffice, it is not adequate. Nothing is ever adequate - truth is so vast and words are so small.
CHAPTER 7
Truth is neither holy nor unholy
27 April 1977 am in Buddha Hall
ITISINTHEBEGINNING, IN THE MIDDLE, AND
THE END; YET END AND BEGINNING ARE NOWHERE ELSE.
ALL THOSE WITH MINDS DELUDED BY INTERPRETATIVE THOUGHTS ARE IN TWO MINDS ANDSO DISCUSSNOTHINGNESS AND COMPASSION AS TWO THINGS.
BEES KNOW THAT IN FLOWERS
HONEY CAN BE FOUND.
THAT SAMSARA AND NIRVANA ARE NOT TWO
HOW WILL THE DELUDED EVER UNDERSTAND?
WHEN THE DELUDED IN A MIRROR LOOK
THEYSEEAFACE, NOT A REFLECTION.
SOTHEMINDTHATHASTRUTH DENIED
RELIESONTHATWHICH IS NOT TRUE.
THOUGH THE FRAGRANCE OF A FLOWERCANNOTBETOUCHED,
'TIS ALL PERVASIVE AND ATONCE PERCEPTIBLE.
SO BY UNPATTERNED BEING-IN-SELF
RECOGNIZE THE ROUND OF MYSTIC CIRCLES.
TRUTH IS. IT SIMPLY IS. IT JUST IS. It never comes into existence, never goes out of existence. It never comes, it never goes. It abides. In fact, that which abides, we call it truth. It remains. That which remains, remains for ever, is called truth. It is in the beginning, it is in the middle, it is in the end. In fact, there is no beginning, no middle, no end. It is all over.
Looked into deeply,thebeginning isin it,themiddleisin it,the end isin it-itpervadesall. Because only IT is. In millions of forms it is the same reality that is being expressed. Forms are different, but the substance, the essence, is the same.
Forms are like waves and the essence is like the ocean.
Remember, Tantra does not talk about God. To talk about God is a little anthropomorphic; it is to create God in man's image. It is to think about God is human terms - that is creating a limitation. God MUSTbe like human beings,true -butHe mustbe like horses also,and He mustbe like dogs too, and He must be like rocks, and He must be like stars... He must be like all. Yes, man will be included AS a form, but man cannot be THE form.
Just think of God as a horse - it looks absurd. Think of God as a dog - it looks sacrilegious. But we goon thinking ofGod asman -and itdoesn'tlooksacrilegious? Itisthehuman ego. Man feels very veryhappywhen hecan thinkin terms of God being likehim. In theBible itissaid God created man in Hisown image -certainlythisis written byman. Ifhorseswere writing theirBible,they would not write that, certainly not. They might even write that God created the Devil in man's image, because God - how can God create man in His own image? And man has been so cruel to horses; nothing in man seems to be divine - ask a horse. Maybe the Devil, maybe a representative of Beelzebub, but not God at all.
Tantra drops that whole anthropomorphism. Tantra brings things to their right proportion, puts man in his right place. Tantra is a great vision. It is not centered on man. It is not centered on any partial attitude. Itseesrealityasitis-in itssuchness,in itsTATHATA,in itsthusness. Itdoesnottalkabout God. Instead of God, Tantra talks about truth.
Truth is non-personal, impersonal. Truth can have the qualities of all; there is no limitation in it. The Bible says: In the beginning God created the world. Tantra says: Howcan there be any beginning? And how can there be any end? And when there is no beginning and no end, how can there be a middle? It is all eternity: it is not time. Tantra is a vision beyond time. In time there is a beginning and there is a middle and there is an end, but in eternity there is no beginning, no middle, no end. It simply is.
Truth is nottemporal. In fact,time exists in truth as awave,and space exists in truth asawave. Itis not vice versa. Truth does not exist in space, does not exist in time. Time and space exist in truth; they are modes of truth. Just as a horse is a form, a man is a form, so space is a form, a bigger wave, so is time.
Truth is timelessness. Truth is spacelessness. Truth is transcendence.
Truth exists by itself. Everything else exists with the support of truth. Truth is self-evident; nothing else is self-evident. Truth is the very ground of being, the ultimate substratum of existence.
Tantra does not create any ritual, does not create any worship, does not create any temple, does not create the priesthood - they are not needed. Man can stand face to face with truth in direct relationship; no mediator is needed, no priest is needed. The priests GO on talking about truth and God and heaven and a thousand and one things, not knowing anything of what they are talking about. Words, mere words. They have not experienced. Those words are just empty.
I was reading about a very famous priest who had been feeling unwell for some time:
He called in his doctor who gave him a thorough overhaul. ”Well,” he said, ”I will be quite frank with you: I am afraid that your lungs are not in good shape. You ought to spend a few months in Switzerland.”
”Oh, dear,” replied thepriest. ”I'mafraid Icould notmanageit. Thatwillnotbepossible-myfinance won't allow me. I'm a poor man, you know.”
”Well, it's up to you,” said the doctor. ”It is either Switzerland or heaven.”
The priest thought for a while and then said, ”Oh, alright then - then Switzerland.”
Who wants to go to heaven? - not even the priest who continuously talks about it. It is a trick to paint death in beautiful colors, but you know all the time it is death. How can you befool yourself?
Gurdjieff used to say that if you want to get rid of religion, live near by a priest and you will get rid of religion. Maybe the ordinary human being is deceived, but how can the priest be deceived? He himself is creating the whole deception. No priest is ever deceived. They talk about one thing; they know something else. They say one thing; they do something else.
I was reading about a rabbi:
A Jew, a young man, came to his rabbi. ”Rabbi, could I ask your advice on rather an important matter?”
”Certainly,” came the reply.
”Well, it's like this: I am in love with two girls... that is, I think I am. Now, one is very beautiful but has no money, while the other is rather nice but very plain, although she has plenty of money. What would you do in the circumstances? If you were me, rabbi, what would you do?”
”Well,” said the rabbi, ”I'm sure that in your heart you love the beautiful one, so I should go ahead and marry her.”
”Right!” said the fellow. ”Thank you, rabbi. That's what I'll do.”
As he prepared to depart, the rabbi said, ”Oh, by the way, I wonder if you could give me the address of the other girl?”
The priest, the rabbi, the parson - they know well that whatsoever they are talking about is just nonsense. It is for others - it is meant for others.
Tantra creates no priesthood. When there is no priesthood, religion is pure. Bring in the priest and he poisons. Bring in the priest and it is BOUND to be poisoned, because the priest has his own investment in it.
A man entered into a pub, and while he was drinking he saw a drunkard coming out of the pub, somehow dragging himself, wavering. And then, suddenly, the drunkard who had come out of the pub started making gestures as if he was driving a car, and making the noises of the engine and the honking of the horn.
The newcomer was surprised. He asked the pub-owner, ”Why don't you tell this poor guy what he is doing?”
And the pub-owner said, ”He always does that. Whenever he has taken too much he does that. Now he will do italmostthewhole night. Hewill goaround and around in the town;hethinksheisdriving a great car.”
So the newcomer said, ”But why don't you explain it to him?”
He said, ”Why should we explain? - he gives 1perweektokeepthecarwashed.”
When you have an investment in somebody's illusion, you cannot destroy that illusion. You would like the illusion to continue. Once the priest comes in, he has his investment in all your illusions: illusions about God, illusions about soul, illusions about heaven, illusions about hell - he now has a greatstake. Nowhe dependson yourillusions, he liveson yourillusions -he exploitsyourillusions.
Tantra is a disillusionment. It has not created any priesthood. Tantra says it is between you and truth itself, and there should be no one standing between you and truth. Let your heart be open to truth, and truth is enough. Nobody is needed to interpret it. YOU ARE ENOUGH to know what it is. In fact, the more you are full of the interpretations, the less is the possibility to know that which is.
Truth is in the beginning, truth is in the middle and truth is in the end. In fact, there is no middle, no beginning, no end - it is all one. Truth is not passing... it abides.
This is the first sutra. Saraha says to the king:
ITISINTHEBEGINNING, IN THE MIDDLE, AND
THE END; YET END AND BEGINNING ARE NOWHERE ELSE.
Endandbeginningarenowhereelse. Nowistruth-time, and here is truth-space. THISverymoment, truth is converging here... now. THIS very moment is the beginning, is the middle, is the end. You need not go into the past to know when the existence began. This very moment it is beginning. You need not go into the future to see when existence will end. It is ending this very moment! EACH momentisabeginning,andthemiddle,andtheend-becauseeachmomentexistenceisnew,each moment it is dying and is reborn. Each moment everything goes into the state of non-manifestation and comes back into the state of manifestation.
Now there are rumors in modern physics that this Tantra attitude may be true, may be ultimately true. It may be that each moment everything disappears and comes back again, pops back again; disappears, pops back again. But the interval is so small that we cannot see it. Tantra says that's why it remains fresh, existence remains fresh.
Except for man everything is fresh, because it is only man who carries the load, the luggage of memory. That'swhymanbecomesdirty,unclean,loaded,burdened-otherwisethewholeexistence is new and fresh. It carries no past and it imagines no future. It is SIMPLY here! totally here! When you are carrying the past, much of your being is involved in the past - a past which is not. Andwhen you are imagining the future, much of your being is involved in the future, which is not, not yet. You are spread very thin; that's why your life has no intensity.
Tantra says to know truth one needs only one thing: intensity - total intensity. How to create this total intensity? Drop the past and drop the future, then your whole life energy is focussed on the small herenow, and in that focussing you are a fire, you are a fire alive. You are the same fire that Moses saw on the mountain, and God was standing in the fire, and the fire was not burning Him. And the fire was not burning even the green bush; the bush was alive and fresh and young.
The whole of life is fire. To know it, you need intensity, otherwise one lives lukewarm. Tantra says there is only one commandment: Don't live lukewarm. That is not a way to live - that is a slow suicide. When you are eating, be intensely there. The ascetics have condemned tantrikas very much; they say they are just eat-drink-be-merry people. In a way, they are true, but in a way they are wrong - because there is a great difference between the ordinary eat-drink-be-merry person and a tantrika.
A tantrika says: This is the WAY to know truth - but while you are eating, then let there be only eating and nothing else, then let the past disappear and the future too; then let your whole energy be poured on your food. Let there be love and affection and gratitude towards food. Chew each bite with tremendous energy, and you will have not only the taste of the food but the taste of existence - because the food is part of existence! It brings life. It brings vitality, it brings PRANA. It makes you tick on. It helps you to remain alive. It is not just food. Food may be the container - life is contained in it. If you taste only food and you don't taste existence in it, you are living a lukewarm life; then you don't know how a tantrika lives. When you are drinking water, become thirst! Let there be an intensity to it, so each drop of cool water gives you tremendous joy. In that very experience of those drops of water entering into your throat and giving you great contentment, you will taste God, you will taste reality.
Tantra is NOT ordinary indulgence: it is extraordinary indulgence. It is not ordinary indulgence because it indulges in God Himself. But, Tantra says, it is through the small things of life that you have the taste. There are no big things in life; everything is small. The small thing becomes big and great if you enter into it utterly, totally, wholly.
Making love to a woman or a man, be the love. Forget everything! In that moment let there be nothing else. Let the whole existence converge on your love-making. Let that love be wild, innocent - innocent in the sense that there is no mind to corrupt it. Don't think about it! Don't imagine about it! because all that imagination and thinking keeps you thin, spread thin. Let all thinking disappear. Let the act be total! You be in the act-lost, absorbed, gone... and then, through love, you will know what God is.
Tantra says it can be known through drinking, it can be known through eating, it can be known through love. It can be known from EVERY space, from every corner, from every angle - because all angles are His. Itis all truth.
And don't think that you are unfortunate because you were not in the beginning when God created theworld-HeiscreatingRIGHTNOW!Youarefortunatetobehere. YoucanseeHimcreatingTHIS moment. And don't think you will miss when the world disappears with a bang - it is disappearing right now. Each moment it is created; each moment it disappears. Each moment it is born; each moment it dies. So Tantra says let that be your life also - each moment dying to the past; each moment being born anew. Don't carry the load; remain empty.
... AND YET END AND BEGINNING ARE NOWHERE ELSE.
They are herenow.
ALL THOSE WITH MINDS DELUDED BY INTERPRETATIVE THOUGHTS AREIN
TWO MINDS AND SO DISCUSSNOTHINGNESS AND COMPASSION AS TWO THINGS.
NOW THERE ARE TWO WAYS to describe this experience of truth, this existential experience of that which is, the experience of suchness. There are two ways to describe it because we have two types of words: the positive and the negative. Saraha's emphasis is on the negative, because that was the emphasis of Buddha.
Buddha liked the negative very much - for a certain reason. When you describe existence with a positive word, the positive word gives it a certain boundary; all positive words have boundaries. Negative words don't have any boundaries; the negative is unbounded. For example, if you call existence'all, God, Absolute,' then you are giving a certain boundary. The moment you call it'Absolute', the notion arises that the thing is finished; that it is no more an on-going process. You call it'Brahma', then it seems the perfection has arrived; now there is no more to it. When you call it God, you give it a definition... and existence is so vast, it cannot be defined; it is so vast that all positive words fall short.
So Buddha has chosen the negative. He calls it SHOONYAM - nothingness, zero. Just listen to the word: nothingness. Taste it, turn it this way and that: you cannot find any boundary in it - nothingness. Itis unbounded. God? - immediately there is a boundary. The momentyou say'God', existence becomes a little smaller. The moment you say'nothingness', all boundaries disappear.
Buddhist emphasis is on the negative for this reason, but remember: Buddha does not mean by'nothing' just nothing. When Buddha says'nothingness' he means'no-thingness'. No thing can define existence because all things are in it and it is bigger than all things. It is more than all the parts put together. Now, this has to be understood - one of the Tantra attitudes.
You look at a roseflower. You can go to the chemist; he can analyze the flower, and he will tell you of what constituents it is made - what matter, what chemicals, what colors - he can dissect it. But if you ask, ”Where is the beauty of it?” he will shrug his shoulders. He will say, ”I could not find any beauty in it. This is all that I could find - this many colors, this much matter, these chemicals. That's all. AND I have not missed anything and nothing has been left outside. You can weigh: it is exactly the same weight as the flower. So nothing has left it.” Then you must have been deluded; that beauty must have been your projection.
Tantra says beauty exists - but beauty is more than all the parts put together. The whole is more than the sum of the parts. That is one of the Tantra attitudes, of very great significance. Beauty is more than that of which it is constituted.
Or, a small baby, bubbling with joy, giggling, happy, life is there - dissect the small baby; put the baby on the surgeon's table. What will you find after dissection? There will be no bubbling joy, there will be no laughter, no giggling. There will be no innocence found. There will be NO life found. The moment you cut the baby, the baby is gone, the life disappears. But the surgeon will insist that nothing has left. You can weigh; the parts weigh the same as the whole baby used to weigh - nothing has left; it is exactly the same baby. But can you convince the mother that it is the same baby? Are YOU convinced it is the same baby? And if the child belonged to the surgeon himself, would he be convinced itisthe same baby? these dead limbsLying on the table?
Something has disappeared. Maybe that something cannot be weighed, maybe that something is not measurable; maybe that something is not physical, maybe that something is not material but something has left. The baby will not dance any more, and the baby will not laugh any more, and the baby will not eat and will not drink and will not go to sleep and will not cry and will not be loving and will not be angry - something has left.
Tantrasaysthetotal isnotthewhole. Thesum total ofthepartsisnotthe whole-thewholeismore than the sum total ofthe parts. And in thatmorenessisthe experience oflife.
Nothingness means no-thingness. All things put together will not make existence - existence is more. It is always more than its parts; that's the beauty of it, that's the life of it. That's why it is so tremendously delightful. That's why there is celebration.
So these two - positive and negative words have to be remembered. Tantra will be using negative words, Buddhist Tantra especially. Hindu Tantra uses positive words; that's one of the differences between Hindu Tantra and Buddhist Tantra. Buddha always uses no' to describe the Ultimate, because he says once you start giving attributes, those attributes are limiting factors.
So Buddha says: Go on eliminating - NETI, NETI; go on saying this is not, this is not, this is not. And then that which is left after ALL denials is.
So remember that nothingness does not mean emptiness - it means fullness, but indescribable fullness. That indescribableness has been described through the word'nothing'.
ALL THOSE WITH MINDS DELUDED BY INTERPRETATIVE
THOUGHTS ARE IN TWO MINDS...
Saraha says: Those who are too much analytical, interpretative, continuously thinking in categories of mind, they are always divided, they are split. There is always a problem for them. The problem is not in existence; that problem comes from their own divided mind. Their own mind is not a single unity.
Now, you can ask the scientist also; he says mind is divided in two parts: the left and the right, and bothfunctiondifferently-notonlydifferently:bothfunctiondiametricallyoppositetoeachother.The left side mind is analytical, and the right side mind is intuitive. The left side mind is mathematical, logical, syllogistic. The right side mind is poetic, artistic, aesthetic, mystic. And they live in different categories, and there is only a very small bridge between the two, just a small link.
Sometimes it has happened that in some accident that link was broken, and the man became two. In the Second World War there were many cases when the link was broken and the man became two; then he was not one man. Then sometimes he would say one thing in the morning and by the evening he would completely forget about it and he would start saying something else. In the morning one hemisphere was working, in the evening another hemisphere is working. And these change.
Modern science has to look deeply into it. Yoga has looked very deeply into it - Yoga says: When your breathing changes... for near about forty minutes you breath through one nostril, and then for forty minutes you breath through another nostril. Up to now modern science has not thought about it, why the breathing changes and what the implications of it are. But Yoga has thought deeply about it.
When your left nostril is working, your right mind will function; when your right nostril is working, your left mind will function. This is a sort of arrangement inside so one mind functions only for forty minutes and then it can rest. Somehow, man has felt it even without knowing exactly what it is, that after each forty minutes you have to change your work that's why in the schools, colleges, universities, they change the period after forty minutes. One part of the mind becomes tired. Forty minutesseemstobetheultimatelimit,thenitneedsrest.Soifyouhavebeenstudyingmathematics, itisgoodafterfortyminutestostudypoetry;thenyoucancomebacktomathematicsagain.
This became very clear in the Second World War, that the bridge is very small, very fragile, and can bebrokenbyanyaccident. Andonceitisbroken,themanfunctionsastwo,thenheisnotoneman; for forty minutes he is one man, for forty minutes he is another man. If he borrows money from you, afterfortyminuteshewilldenyit;hewillsay,”Ihavenevertakenit.”AndheisnotLying,remember- heisnotLying.Themindthathastakenisnomorefunctioning,sohehasnomemoryaboutit. The other mind has never borrowed; the other mind will simply, flatly deny that ”Have you gone mad? I have never borrowed anything from you.”
And this happens even in those whose links are not broken. You can watch your own life and you will find a rhythm - continuously. Just a moment before, you were so loving towards your wife, and suddenly something clicks and you are no more loving. And you are worried - because you are linked, you have a slight memory, a remembrance of just a few minutes before. You were so loving and flowing, and what happened? Suddenly the flow is not there; you are frozen. Maybe you were holding the hand of your wife and the mind has changed and another mind has come in, and the hand is in your hand! but suddenly energy is no more flowing. Now you want to leave the hand and escape from this woman. In fact, you start thinking, ”What are you doinghere? Why are you wasting yourtimewith this woman? What has she got?” And you feelverymuch anxietyalso,becausejusta moment before you were promising, ”I will love you for ever.” And you become worried because you think this is not right. ”Just a moment before I promised, and I am already breaking the promise.”
You are angry and you wanttokillsomebody-and justaFEWminuteslaterthatangerisgone,you are no more angry. You even start feeling compassion for the other person. You start feeling happy: ”It is good that I have not killed him.”
Watch your mind and you will continuously find this shift; this gear goes on changing.
Tantra says there is a state of unity, when the bridge is no more a small link but both the minds are really together. This togetherness is the real meeting of the man and the woman, because one part of the mind, the right mind, is feminine; the left mind is masculine. And when you are making love to a woman or a man, when the orgasm happens, both your minds come very close; that's why the orgasm happens. It has nothing to do with the woman; it has nothing to do with anything outside. It is just inside you. Watch
TANTRIKAS HAVE BEEN WATCHING THE PHENOMENON OF LOVE very deeply, because they think,and theyareright,thatthegreatestphenomenon onearth islove,and thegreatestexperience of humanity is orgasm. So if there is some truth, that truth must be closer in the moment of orgasm than anywhere else. This is simple logic. One need not be very logical about it: it is such an OBVIOUS thing - that this is man's GREATEST joy, so this joy must somehow be opening a door to the infinite - maybe very slightly, very slowly, maybe just a part of it, but something of the infinite enters into it. For a moment the man and the woman are lost, they are no more in their egos; their capsules disappear.
What happens exactly? You can ask the physiologists too. Tantra has discovered many things. A few: one, when you are making love to a woman and you feel orgasmic and happy, it has nothing to do with the woman - the whole thing is happening within you. It has nothing to do with the woman's orgasm; they are not related at all.
When the woman is having her orgasm, she is having her orgasm - it has nothing to do with you. Maybe you just functioned as a triggerpoint, but the woman's orgasm is her private orgasm, and your orgasm is your private orgasm. You both are together, but your orgasm is yours; and when you are having your orgasm your woman cannot share your joy, no. It is just absolutely yours. It is private. She can see something is happening - on your face, in your body - but that is just an observation from the outside. She cannot participate in it. When the woman is having her orgasm, you are just a spectator; you are no more a participant in it.
And even if you both are having orgasms together, then too your orgasmic joy will not be more or less; it will not be affected by the orgasm of the woman, and neither will the woman's orgasm be affected by you. You are completely private, totally in yourself - one thing. That means all orgasm, deep down, is masturbatory. The woman is just a help, an excuse; the man is a help, an excuse - but not a must.
Thesecondthingthattantrikashavebeenwatchingis: whentheorgasmishappening, it has nothing to with your sex centers - nothing. Because if the sex centers are cut from the brain, you will have orgasm, but you will not have any joy. So, deep down, it is not happening at the sex center: it is happening in the brain. Something from the sex center is triggered in the brain, it is happening in the brain. And modern research agrees with it perfectly.
You must have heard the name of the famous psychologist, Delgado. He has devised small instruments: he puts electrodes in the head and those electrodes can be controlled by remote control. You can have a small box of remote control push-buttons. You can keep the box in your pocket and any time you want to have a sexual orgasm, you just push a button. It will have nothing to do with your sex center; that button will just push something in your head - inside the head it will push those centers which are pushed by sexual energy when it is released. It will push them directly and you will have a great orgasm. Or, you can push another button and you will become immediately angry. Or you can push another button and you will fall into a deep depression. You can have all the buttons in the box and you can change your mood as you like.
When Delgado experimented with his animals for the first time, particularly with mice, he was surprised. He fixed the electrode in his most favorite mouse, who was very well trained; he had been experimenting with him for many days, and a very intelligent mouse He fixed his electrode
in his head and gave a box to the mouse and trained him to push the button. Once he knew that when the button is pushed he has a sexual orgasm, the mouse went mad. In one day, six thousand times He died! because he would not go anywhere. He would not eat, he would not sleep, he
would... he forgot everything. He was just going crazy pushing the button again and again and again.
This modern research into the human brain says exactly what Tantra has been saying. First, the orgasm has nothing to do with the person outside - your woman, your man. Second it has nothing todowith yoursexenergy. Thewoman triggersyoursexenergy, yoursexenergytriggersyourbrain energy; a brain center is triggered - but orgasm happens exactly there in the brain, in the head.
That's why pornography has so much appeal, because pornography can directly stimulate your brain. A beautiful woman or an ugly woman has nothing to do with your orgasm. An ugly woman can give you as beautiful an orgasm as a beautiful woman, but why don't you like the ugly woman? It does not appeal to the head, that's all. Otherwise, as far as orgasm is concerned, both are as capable. The ugliest woman or the most beautiful woman, a Cleopatra, is immaterial - but your head, your brain, is more interested in the form, in the beauty.
Tantrasaysonceweunderstand thiswholemechanism oforgasm, a great understanding can arise. One step more:
Modern research agrees up to this point, that orgasm happens in the brain. The woman's orgasm happens in the right side of the brain; about that modern research is not yet capable of saying anything - but Tantra does. The woman's orgasm happens in the right side brain, because that is the feminine center. And the male orgasm happens in the left - that is the male brain. Tantra goes further into this work, and Tantra says when both these sides of the brain come together great joy arises, total orgasm happens.
And these sides of the brain can come together very easily - the less analytic you are, the closer they are. That's why an interpretative mind is never a happy mind. A non-interpretative mind is happier. Primitive people are more joyous than the so-called civilized, the educated, the cultured. Animals are happier than human beings, birds are happier; they don't have the analytical mind. The analytical mind makes the gap bigger.
The more you start thinking logically, the bigger is the gap between the two minds. The less you think logically, the closer they come. The more poetic, the more aesthetic your approach is, the more they willcome close and the more possibility of joy, delight, celebration, there willbe.
And the last point, which I think will take many centuries for science to come to. The last point is that the joy is not happening exactly in the brain either - it happens in the witness who is standing behind both these sides af the brain. Now, if the witness is too much attached to the male mind, then the joy will not happen so much. Or, if the witness is attached too much to the female mind, then joy will be a little more, but not so much.
Can't you see? - women are happier creatures than men. That's why they look more beautiful, more innocent, younger. They live long, they live more peacefully, more contentedly. They are not worried so much; they don't commit suicide so much, they don't go mad so much - the proportion is double. Man goes twice as much: in suicide also man commits twice as much, and in madness also. And all the wars, if you include them also in suicidal and murderous activities, then man has been doing nothing else. Down the centuries he has been preparing for war, killing people.
Thefemininemindismorejoyousbecauseitismorepoetic,moreaesthetic,moreintuitive. Butifyou are not attached to any part and you are just a witness, then your joy is utter, ultimate. This joy we have called'anand' - bliss. To know this witness is to become one, absolutely one; then the woman and the man in you disappear completely, then they are lost into oneness. Then orgasmicness is yourmoment-to-momentexistence. And in thatstate,sexdisappearsautomatically-becausethere is no need. When a person lives orgasmically twenty-four hours a day, what is the need?
In your witnessing you become orgasmic. Orgasm then is not a momentary thing - then it is your simple nature. This is what ecstasy is.
ALLTHOSEWITH MINDSDELUDEDBYINTERPRETATIVETHOUGHTSAREIN
TWOMINDSANDSODISCUSSNOTHINGNESSANDCOMPASSION ASTWOTHINGS.
Sarahasaysthattheexistenceisnothingness,butdon'tbeworried-by'nothingness'wedon'tmean thatitisemptyofeverything. In fact, we mean itisfull-itisso fullthatwe callitnothing. Ifwecallit something, that will make ademarcation,and itis unbounded -so we callitnothing. ButBuddhists have been asked again and again: If it is nothing, then from where does the compassion come? then why does Buddha talk about compassion?
Saraha says: Nothingness and compassion are two aspects of the same energy. Nothingness, in existence, means: I have to be non-egoistic. Ego means: I am something. If existence is nothing and I have to go into participation with this existence, if I have to become part of this existence, I have to drop the ego. The ego is making me somebody, is giving me a definition, a limitation. When existence is without any self, it is nothingness - anatta - then I have also to be a nothing; only then will these two nothings be capable of meeting with each other and dissolving into each other. I have to become a no-ego, andin thatno-ego is compassion.
With ego is passion: with no-ego is compassion. With ego there is violence: with no-ego there is love. With ego there is aggression, anger, cruelty: with no-ego there is kindness, sharing, affection.
So, Saraha says compassion has not to be cultivated. If you can live in nothingness, compassion will be flowing out of you of its own accord. I have heard:
Aman wenttohisbankmanagertoaskforaloan. Afterhehadtaken particulars, thebankmanager said, ”By rights, I should refuse your request, but I will give you a sporting chance. Now, one of my eyes is made of glass: if you can tell me which one it is I will grant you the loan.”
The customer lookedatthe other intently for afewmoments andthen said, ”Itis your righteye, sir.”
”That's correct,” said the bank manager - he could not believe it, how he had guessed it. He said, ”How did you guess?”
”Well,”repliedthe customer, ”it appeared to be more compassionate, so I thoughtitmustbe aglass eye.”
The ego, the calculating, cunning mind, is never compassionate, cannot be. In the very existence of the ego, there is violence. If you are, you are violent. You cannot be non-violent. If you want to be non-violent, you will haveto drop yourI, you will have to become a nothingness. Out of nothingness isnon-violence. Itisnotaquestion ofpractising it;itisaquestion of becoming nobody, then itflows. Itis the blockofthe'I'thatis blocking the flowofyour energies;otherwise, compassion is easy.
Saraha says: Nothingness and compassion are not two things. You be nothing and there will be compassion. Or, you attain to compassion and you will find you have become nothing, a nobody.
This characterization of existence as nothingness is a great step towards annihilation of the ego. And this is one of the greatest contributions of Buddha to the world. Other religions go on cultivating in subtle ways the same ego. The righteous person starts feeling, ”I am righteous”; the moralist thinks, ”I am more moral than others.” The man who practises religion thinks himself more religious than others, but these are all ego qualities, and these are not going to help ultimately. Buddha says cultivation is not the question - understanding, awareness is needed that there is NOBODY in you!
Have you ever looked inside? Have you ever gone inside and looked around? Is there anybody? You will not find anybody. You will find silence. You will not come across anybody.
Socrates says: Know thyself! And Buddha says: If you come to know, you will not find any'thyself'; there is nobody inside, there is pure silence. You will not hit against any wall, and you will not come across any self. It is emptiness. It is as empty as existence itself. Andout ofthat emptiness, everything is flowing; out of that nothingness, everything is flowing.
BEES KNOW THAT IN FLOWERS
HONEYCANBE FOUND.
THAT SAMSARA AND NIRVANA ARE NOT TWO
HOW WILL THE DELUDED EVER UNDERSTAND?
HAVE YOU WATCHED IT? Around a small beautiful lake there are many flowers. Frogs may be sitting just by the roots of the flowers, but they don't know that flowers have honey in them.
BEES KNOW THAT IN FLOWERS
HONEYCANBE FOUND.
Waterfowl, swans, fish and frogs do not know - even when they are living just by the side of the plants. To know that flowers have honey, one has to become a bee. Saraha says the tantrika is like a bee and the ascetic is like a frog. He lives by the side of the flowers, and he is not at all aware. Notonlyishenotaware: hedenies. He thinks bees are indulgent, that bees are fools, that they are destroying themselves.
Saraha says ascetics are like frogs and the tantrika is like a bee. In the phenomenon of sex there is hidden the sublime. In the energy of sex there is a key which can open the door of existence. But frogs will not know it. Tantra says it is such an obvious fact, that out of sex energy life is born - that meansthatsexmustbeattheverycoreoflife. Lifecomesthroughsexenergy. Anewchildisborn through sex energy, a new being enters into existence, a new guest comes into existence - through sex energy! Sex energy is the most creative energy. Certainly, if we look deep into it we may find even more, greater, more creative possibilities of it.
Tantrasayssexisthelowestrungofthesexenergy,oflibido. Ifyouenterintoitwithmoreawareness and you search into it deeply, you will find the highest possibility, Samadhi, hidden in it.
Sex is like Samadhi fallen into the mud; itis like a diamond which has fallen into the mud. You clean the diamond; the mud cannot destroy it. The mud is only on the surface; you just wash the diamond and again it is shining with all its luster and all its glory.
Insexishiddenthediamond. InloveishiddenGod. WhenJesussaysGodislove,hemayhavegot this idea somewhere from Tantra, because the Jewish God is not love at all. It cannot come from the Jewish tradition. The Jewish God is a very angry God.
The Jewish God says, ”I am very jealous, I am very angry. And if you go against me, I will take revenge.” The Jewish God is a very dictatorial God. Love does not fit with the Jewish idea. From where did Jesus get this idea that God is love? Every possibility is that it came through the Tantric school of India, that it spread from the tantrikas.
Saraha was here three hundred years before Jesus. Who knows? Maybe it was Saraha and Saraha's idea which travelled. There are absolute reasons to think so. There is every possibility of Jesus' coming to India, there is every possibility of messengers spreading from India towards Israel.
But one thing is certain, that it is Tantra which has looked at God as love energy. But Christians missed. Even Jesushasgiven the hintthatGod islove. they have missed. They have interpreted it asGod-loving - they missed it. Jesusisnotsaying God is loving: Jesusissaying God islove-God is equal to love. It is a formula: love is equal to God. If you go deep into love you will find God, and there is no other way to find God.
BEES KNOW THAT IN FLOWERS
HONEY CAN BE FOUND.
THATSAMSARAANDNIRVANAARE NOT TWO
HOWWILLTHE DELUDED EVER UNDERSTAND?
Who are these deluded people? The frogs, the ascetics, the so-called mahatmas, who go on denying the world because they say God is against the world. This is foolish! If God is against theworld,then whydoesHe goon creating it? He can simply stop it any moment if He issoagainst it. If He agreed with your mahatmas, then He would have stopped it long before. But He goes on creating. He doesnotseem to be againstit-He seemsto be absolutely for it.
Tantra says God is not against the world: Samsara and Nirvana are not two - they are one. The asceticfightssexenergyand through thatfighting,hestartsfalling awayfrom God,fallingawayfrom life, falling away from the vital source of life. And then there are perversions - bound to be. The more you fight with something, the more perverted you become. And then you start finding tricks, backdoors to enter into it again.
So the ascetic, on the surface, fights with sex,fightswith life,and deepdownstartsfantasizing about it. The more he represses, the more he becomes obsessed with it. The ascetic is the obsessed person: thetantrikaisaverynatural person -hehasnoobsessions. But the irony is that the ascetic thinks that the tantrika is obsessed; the ascetic thinks that the tantrikas talk about sex - ”Why do they talkaboutsex?”-but the real obsession isin the ascetic. He doesnottalkaboutit,or, even if he talksaboutit he only talksto condemn it-but he continuously thinksaboutit. Hismind goeson reeling around and around it.
It is difficult to go against God - even if you go, your failure is certain. Mind will find some way or other.
I have heard:
A Jew was talking to a friend and said, ”I prefer to sleep alone. I believe in celibacy. In fact, ever since we were married, my wife and I have had separate rooms.”
”But,” said the friend, ”supposing during the night you feel that you would like a little love, what do you do?”
”Oh,” replied the other, ”I just whistle.”
The friend was astonished, but went on to ask, ”But supposing it is the other way round and your wife feels that she would like a little loving - what happens then?”
”Oh,” he replied, ”she comes to my door and taps, and when I answer says,'Ikey, did you whistle?'”
Whetheryoustayinthesameroomornot,whatdoesitmatter?Mindwillfindsomeway-themind will start whistling. And the woman cannot whistle, of course; she is expected not to be so vulgar as to whistle. But she can come and knock on the door and can ask, ”Ikey, did YOU whistle?”
Mind is very cunning. But one thing is certain: you cannot escape the reality of life. If you try to escape, your cunning mind will find ways - and will become more cunning. And you will be more in the trap of the mind. I can't see any ascetic ever realizing truth - impossible. He denies life: how can he realize truth?
Truth has to be alive. Truth has to be with life, in life. That's why to my sannyasins I never say leave life - I say be in life. Be totally in it! There is the door, somewhere in the marketplace.
THAT SAMSARA AND NIRVANA ARE NOT TWO, says Saraha,
HOW WILL THE DELUDED EVER UNDERSTAND?
But the frogs? how will they ever understand? Become a bee! Let this be a deep remembrance in you, at least for my sannyasins: Become a bee; don't become a frog. These flowers of life are carrying the honey of God... collect.
WHEN THE DELUDED IN A MIRROR LOOK
THEY SEE A FACE, NOT A REFLECTION.
SO THE MIND THAT HAS TRUTH DENIED
RELIES ON THAT WHICH IS NOT TRUE.
THE MIND IS LIKE A MIRROR - it only reflects, it can only give you a shadow experience; never the real, never the original. It is like a lake, and you can see the full moon in the lake reflected, but the reflection is not the real moon. And if you start thinking that the reflection is the real moon, you will never find the real moon.
Says Saraha:
WHEN THE DELUDED IN A MIRROR LOOK
THEY SEE A FACE, NOT A REFLECTION.
What is the difference in seeing a face and not a reflection? When you start seeing the face in the mirror, you are deluded; you are thinking, ”That is my face.” That is not your face - that is just the reflection of your face. In the mirror there can be no real face, only reflections.
Mind is a mirror! It reflects reality, but if you start believing in that reflection, you are believing in untruth, in the image. And that very belief will become a barrier. Saraha says if you want to know the truth, put the mind aside - otherwise it will go on reflecting and you will go on looking at the reflection. Put the mind aside! If you really want to know the real, then go against the reflection.
For example, you see the full moon reflected in the lake. Now, where are you going to seek the full moon? Are you going to take a jump into the lake? Are you going to dive deep into the lake to find the moon? Then you will neverfind it. You may even missyourself. Ifyou reallywantto see the real moon, then go against the reflection, just in the diametrically opposite direction - then you will find the moon. Don't go in the mind; go diametrically opposite to the mind.
Mind analyzes: you synthesize. Mind believes in logic: don't believe in logic. Mind is very calculative, mind is very cunning: you be innocent. Go in the opposite direction! Mind asks for proofs, reasons -don'taskforproofsand reasons. Thatisthe meaning oftrust: go into the opposite direction. Mind is a great doubter. If you doubt, you go into the mind. If you don't doubt, you go against the mind. Doubt not! Life is to be lived, not to be doubted. Life is to be trusted. Go hand in hand with trust and you will find truth: go with doubt and you. will go astray.
The search for truth is the search in the opposite direction of the mind because mind is a mirror, it reflects. And toputthemind aside iswhatmeditation isall about;to putthe thoughts aside, thinking aside, mentation aside, is what meditation is all about.
When you can look into reality without thoughts reflecting it, truth is herenow, then you are truth and all is truth. Mind is the great faculty of delusion, illusion, of dreaming.
THOUGH THE FRAGRANCE OF A FLOWER CANNOT BE TOUCHED,
'TIS ALL PERVASIVE AND AT ONCE PERCEPTIBLE.
SO BY UNPATTERNED BEING-IN-ITSELF
RECOGNIZE THE ROUND OF MYSTIC CIRCLES.
A great sutra:
THOUGH THE FRAGRANCE OF A FLOWER CANNOT BE TOUCHED...
You cannot touch the fragrance of a flower.
IT IS ALL PERVASIVE AND AT ONCE PERCEPTIBLE.
But you can smell it. You cannotsee it, but you can smell it. It surrounds you. You cannot touch it; it is not tangible, it is not touchable. And if you make tangibility the criterion of truth, then you will say it is not true. Truth is not thinkable. If you think, you will miss.
Truth can be experienced, but cannot be known. Truth can be realized, but not concluded. Just as the fragrance of a flower cannot be seen by the eyes, cannot be heard by the ears... if you make it a criterion that”Unless Ihearthe smellIwillnotbelieve,unless Isee the smellIwillnotbelieve,”then you are creating barriers and you will never come to know it.
And, by and by, if you don't believe it, if you don't believe at all, you will lose the faculty of smelling it - because any faculty that is not used, not trusted, falls out of use, becomes by and by crippled. Trust is a faculty! You have been with doubt so long, married with doubt so long, that you say, ”I will first need rational proofs - I doubt.” So you remain with doubt, and truth can be known only through trust, just as fragrance can be known only by smell. It is there if you smell. If you trust, truth is there.
SHRADDHA -trust,faith -simply indicates one thing: that the faculty to know truth is not doubt,is not skepticism. If you insist on doubt, you remain with doubt.
IT ISALL PERVASIVEAND AT ONCE PERCEPTIBLE.
With trust, immediately it is there - at once! Not a single moment
SO BY UNPATTERNED BEING-IN-ITSELF...
And what is trust? I have never come across such a beautiful definition of trust:
SO BY UNPATTERNED BEING-IN-ITSELF...
Don't pattern yourself! All patterning is a sort of armoring. All patterning is a sort of protection. All patterning is a way to avoid. Be open, don't be patterned.
SO BY UNPATTERNED BEING-IN-ITSELF...
If you are not patterned, if you are simply open, you don't have any armour, you are not protecting yourself by logic, doubt, this and that, you are simply vulnerable... unpatterned, unprotected, under the open sky, all doors open. Let friend or foe enter, anybody, but all doors are open. In that openness, you are being-in-itself, you are in a state of suchness, you are empty, you are a nothingness, and you will recognize what truth is:
RECOGNIZE THE ROUND OF MYSTIC CIRCLES.
And then you will see that out of this suchness two circles are arising: one is of Nirvana, another is of Samsara. Two waves are arising in this ocean of suchness: one is of matter, another is of mind - but both are waves. And you are beyond both. Now there is no division, no distinction. Truth is neither mind nor matter, truth is neither Samsara nor Nirvana, truth is neither unholy nor holy - all distinctions have disappeared.
If you bring your mind to, the ultimate reality, it will not allow you to see the ultimate reality. It will bring something of its own falsities with it.
I was reading one anecdote - meditate over it:
A man arrived atthe Pearly Gates,and on being asked hisname replied,”Charlie Grab-all.”
”I don't think we have any notice of your coming,” he was informed. ”What was your occupation in earthly life?”
”Scrap metal merchant,” the visitor said.
”Oh,” said the angel, ”I will go and inquire.” When he returned, Charlie Grab-all had disappeared - so had the Pearly Gates.
Charlie Grab-all: scrap metal merchant... you carry your habits to the very end.
Maybe mind is useful as far as the man-made world is concerned. Maybe mind is useful as far as thinking about matter is concerned. But to carry this mind to the innermost core of your reality IS dangerous. It will disturb there.
Let me say it in this way: doubt is helpful in the world of science - in fact, without doubt there would be no science. Doubt is the very methodology of science. Because science has become so prevalent,hasbeensosuccessfulinthepast,itseemsthatdoubthasbecometheonlymethodology to inquire. So when you go in, you carry doubt - that's not right. When you are going outwards, doubt is helpful. When you are going inwards, doubt is a barrier. Trust, less and less doubt - if you want to come in, doubt less and less and less and let there be a moment when there is no doubt left. In that state of no-doubt, you will be at the center. If you want to know the outside world, trust will not be helpful.
That also has happened in the past in the East. We came to know the inner reality through trust, so we thought through trust we can create science also - we were never able to create science. In the East we could not create any great science - nothing to say about it, nothing much. Because we entered inside with trust, we thought trust was the only method of inquiry - that was fallacious. We tried trust on the outside objective things and we failed. The East has been a failure as far as science is concerned. The West has succeeded through doubt in science; now, the same fallacy - they think doubt is the only right, valid method to know. It is not. Now, if you try doubt in the inner world, you will fail as certainly as the East has failed in scientific growth.
Doubt is good about objects; trust is good about subjectivity. Doubt is good if you are moving further away from your center towards the periphery; trust is good if you are moving towards the center away from the periphery. Trust and doubt are like two wings.
The humanity that is going to be born in future will be capable of doubting and trustingboth together. That will be the highest synthesis: the synthesis of East and West, the synthesis of science and religion. When a man is capable of doubting and trusting both - when doubt is needed, when he is goingoutwards,hedoubts;and when trustisneeded heputsthedoubtasideand trusts. And aman who is capable of both will be beyond both, certainly beyond both, because he will use both and he will know that ”I am separate from both.” That's transcendence, that'*beyondbothness' is great freedom. Exactly that is what Nirvana is: great freedom.
MEDITATE ON THESE SUTRAS. Saraha is saying great things in simple words. He was showering his great insight on the king. You can also partake of this great insight. You can go very deep into human reality with Saraha.
And always remember: that is the only way to go to the ultimate reality - the human reality is the only way to go to the ultimate reality, because that is where you are. One can proceed only from the place where one is. Sex is your reality: Samadhi can be approached through it. Body is your reality: bodilessness can be approached through it. Outwardness is your reality: inwardness can be approached through it. Your eyes are looking outwards: they can be turned inwards.
CHAPTER 8
Be true to love
28 April 1977 am in Buddha Hall
The first question:
Question 1
I AM A FROG. I KNOW I'M A FROG BECAUSE I LIKE SWIMMING IN MURKY DARK GREEN WATER AND HOPPING ABOUT IN SLIMY MUD. AND WHAT IS HONEY ANYWAY? IF A FROG CAN BE IN AN UNPATTERNED STATE OF BEING, WILL IT BECOME A BEE?
CERTAINLY!TOBEABEEISEVERYBODY'SPOSSIBILITY. Everybody can growintobeing abee. An unpatterned, alive, spontaneous life, moment-to-moment life, is the gate to it, the key to it. If one can live not out of the past then one is a bee, and then there is honey all around.
I know it is difficult to explain this to a frog. The question is right: ”What is honey anyway?” The frog has never known about it. And he lives just at the root of the plant where flowers bloom and bees collecthoney, buthe hasnotmovedin thatdimension.
By'frog' Saraha means a person who lives out of the past, encaged in the past, in the memories. When you live through the past, you only apparently live, you don't really live. When you live through the past you live like a mechanism, not like a man. When you live through the past, it is a repetition, it is a monotonous repetition - you miss the delight, the joy of life and existence. That's what'honey' is: the joy of life, the sweetness of just being herenow, the sweetness of just being able to be. That joy is honey... and there are millions of flowers blooming all around. The whole existence is full of flowers.
If you know how to collect honey, if you know how to be joyful, you become an emperor. If you don't know, you remain a beggar These birds singing here - honey is showering! The bee will
collect; the frog will miss. Thissky,thissun,thesepeoplearound you -everybodyiscarrying infinite sources of honey, everybody is flowing with sweetness and love. If you know how to collect it and how to taste it, it is all over the place. God is all over the place... The taste of God is what Saraha calls'honey'.
The bee has a few things and those have to be understood - and they are very dangerous things. One: the bee is never attached to any flower. That is the most profound secret - the bee is not attached to any flower. It has no nuclear family - no wife, no husband. It simply moves wherever ANY flower invites it. It has freedom.
Manhasbecomeconfined tothefamily. Tantra is very much againstfamily-and the insight is great. Tantrasaysitisbecauseoffamilythatlovehasbeen completely damaged, that the sweetness of life hascompletelybeenpoisoned. People are clinging toeachother. Peoplearetrying to possess each other - not to enjoy but to possess. Possession has become the enjoyment. There has happened a great shift: you are with a woman not to enjoy her, you are NOT enjoying her; you are with a man not to enjoy the man, you are NOT enjoying at all - but to possess. Politics has entered, ambition hasentered,economicshasentered... Love isnotthere.
Love knows no possession. I am not saying you cannot live with a woman for long - you can live for lives together -but there will be no family. By'family' I mean the legal possession; by'family'I mean thedemand. The husband can demand from the wife;he can say, ”You areobliged togiveme love!” Nobody is obliged to give anybody love. The husband can force the wife to love him. When you can force somebody to love, love disappears - then there is only pretension. Then the wife is fulfilling a duty. Then the husband is fulfilling a duty. Duty is not love! Love is honey: duty is white sugar. You will suffer from diabetes sooner or later. It is poison, it is pure poison - white sugar. Yes, it tastes similar, a little bit like the honey, but it is not honey.
The family is very possessive. The family is against man, it is against society, it is against universal brotherhood. The boundary of the family is your imprisonment. You may not feel it because you have become accustomed to it.
Crossing the boundary of a country, have you not felt humiliated? Then you know that the country was not your country - it was a great prison. Getting out and coming in you will know - at the checking post, at the airport. You will know while passing through the customs that you are a prisoner; freedom was bogus, just holy cow dung. But living in a country, if you don't cross the boundary you will never know about it. You will think you are free. You are NOT free! Yes, the rope isbig,you can move around,butyou are not free.
And so is the case with the family. If you start crossing the boundary then you will know you are imprisoned. If you start loving the neighbor then your family will be against you. If you are happy with some other woman, your wife is your enemy. If you are dancing with some other man, your husband is mad at you; he would like to kill you - and just the other day he was saying, ”I love you so much... Ican die foryou.”
Just cross the boundary! and you will know that you are a prisoner. Never cross the boundary, and you can live in blissful ignorance that everything is okay.
It is attachment, it is possessiveness, that has destroyed your capacity to go to many flowers, to taste all the flowers. Just think of a bee only collecting honey from one flower - that honey will not be very rich. The richness comes out of the variety. Your life is boring; it is not rich.
People come to me and they say, ”I am bored! What should I do?” And they are doing everything to get bored, and they are thinking that boredom is happening from somewhere else. Now, you are living with a woman you don't love any more, but your scriptures say: once you have promised, you have to fulfill the promise - be a man of promise! Once you are committed you have to fulfill the commitment. Now, if you are bored, nothing is surprising. Love has disappeared!
It is as if you are forced to eat the same thing every day: how long will you be able to enjoy it? You may have enjoyed it on the first day; yes, the second day; the third day - but then it will start getting on your nerves. Then for ever and ever then you will start getting bored. And because man is
bored he invents a thousand and one ways to distract his mind: sits glued to the chair before the TV for six hours - what stupidity! Or goes to the movie, or listens to the radio, or reads the newspaper, or goes to clubs where bored people just like you gather together. Somehow one is trying to distract oneself from the boredom that has happened out of the relationship.
Try to understand
Tantra says: Be a bee - be free! Tantra is not saying that if you love a woman then don't be together with her - be together with her! - but the commitment is towards love, not towards the woman; the commitment is towards love, not towards the man. This is a BASIC difference: you are committed tolove!youarecommittedtohappiness! Whenloveisdisappearing,whenhappinessisgone,then say thank you and move.
And such should be the case with everything in your life. If you are a doctor and you are bored with your job, then you should be capable of dropping it any moment - whatsoever the cost. With risk, life becomes adventure. But you think, ”Now I am forty, forty-five, and how can I drop out of the job? And it is going very well financially... ” but spiritually, psychologically, you are dying! You are slowly committing suicide. Then it is perfectly okay: if you want to destroy yourself and save the bank-balance, then it is perfectly okay. But the moment you feel that the job is no more a satisfying job, DROP out of it! This is the Tantra revolution. The moment you see that something is no more appealing, has lost the quality of allurement, of enchantment, is no more magnetic, then don't cling to it, then say, ”I am sorry.” Then feel grateful for the past, for all that has happened through the person, through the job, through anything! but remain open in the future. This is the meaning of being a bee.
And Saraha says: Only the bee knows that each flower is full of honey.
But I am not saying go to the opposite extreme - there are people who can go to the opposite extreme. And man is so stupid Just the other day I was reading about a commune in Germany:
Action Analysis Commune. Now, there is a rule in their commune that you cannot sleep with the same woman two nights together. Now, this is again foolish. It seems man is such an idiot that you cannot help him. If you sleep two nights consecutively with one woman, the commune throws you out.
Now, the one extreme has proved wrong - this is another extreme... will prove wrong! The first extreme was repressive: you have to sleep with the same woman for years, for your whole life, with the same man - not knowing WHY, why you continue. The society says so, the state says so, the priest and the politician say so - that on the stability of your nuclear family the whole society depends. This insane society depends on the insane family; the insane family is the unit, the brick, out of which this whole prison is made.
Insane politicians depend on the insane family. Insane religions depend on the insane family. They have been repressing you; they don't allow you to move away from the woman or the man or the relationship. They say you have to be with it, otherwise you are a criminal, a sinner. They make you very afraid of hell and hell-fire.
Now, theoppositeextreme, thatyoucannotstaywith thesamewoman the next night again. Thistoo is again repressive. Ifyouwantto bewith herthe nextnightalso, then...? Then itwill be repression. With the first, love disappeared and boredom entered. With the second, intimacy will disappear and you will feel very alienated, like an island. You will not feel your roots anywhere.
Tantra says: Just in the middle is the way. Be in that place, be with that person, be in that job, where you are enjoying otherwise change. If you can enjoy one woman for your whole life, it is beautiful, it is tremendously beautiful. Youare fortunate, because then intimacywill grow, your roots will go into each other, yourbeingswill become intertwined. Byand by, youwill become ONE person, onesoul, and that is a great experience! The highest peak of Tantra will be known through it. But this is not family-this is love affair. Youhave gone into the verydepth oflove.
Now these kind of people - this A.A. Commune - these kind of people are dangerous! They think they are doing something very great. They are simply reacting. The society has done something wrong, now they are reacting too much and going to the opposite extreme - which will be again wrong. Man has to be balanced somewhere, first thing.
SECOND THING: Saraha says UNSTRUCTURED, UNPATTERNED STATE OF BEING. If you live through habit, you cannot enjoy life because the habit is of the old. How can you enjoy the same thing again and again and again? Your mind remains the same, then there will be boredom. You can even change the woman and the man, but YOU are the same, so fifty percent is always the same. There will be boredom.
So first Tantra says: Never get obsessed with any person, remain free of personalities. Second Tantra says: Remain free of your past - then you are a hundred percent free like a bee. You can fly anywhere. Nothing holds you. Your freedom is utter.
Don't persist in your past pattern. Try to be inventive, try to be innovative! Be an adventurer, a discoverer. Enjoy life through new ways; FIND new ways to enjoy it. In fact, go on finding new ways of doing the same old thing, but find new ways. There are infinite possibilities.
You can come to the same experience from many doors, and each door will give you a different vision. Then life is rich, there is sweetness, there is joy, there is celebration. That is what honey is. Don't be confined in thepattern ofafrog. Yes, thefrog can hopalittle, jumphereand there-cannot fly and cannot know that each flower is carrying divine fragrance. What Saraha means by'honey' is a poetic metaphor for God, that each being is carrying divinity.
People come to me and they say, ”We want to know God - where is God?” Now, the question is just absurd. WHERE IS HE NOT? You ask WHERE He is; you must be dead blind. Can't you see Him? Only He is! In the tree and in the bird, in the animal, in the river, in the mountain, in man, in woman... everywhere He is. He has taken so many forms to surround you, to dance around you. From everywhere He is saying ”Hello!” and you don't listen. From everywhere He is calling you. From everywhere He is inviting you: ”Come to me!” But you are somehow keeping your eyes closed, or you have got blinkers on - you don't look anywhere.
You just look in a very narrow way, in a very focussed way. If you are looking for money, you only look for money; then you don't look anywhere else. If you are looking for power, you look only for power and you don't look anywhere else. And remember: in money; God is not because money is man-made and God cannot be man-made. When I say God is everywhere, remember those things have not to be included which man has made. God cannot be man-made. God is not in money. Money is a very cunning invention of man. And God is not in power; that too is again a madness of man. Just the very idea to dominate somebody is insane. Just the VERY idea that ”I should be in power and others should be powerless” is the idea of a madman - a destructive idea.
God is not in politics and God is not in money and God is not in ambition - but God is everywhere where man has not destroyed Him, where man has not created something of his own. Thisisoneof the most difficult things in the modern world, because you are surrounded by too many man-made things. Can't you just see the fact of it?!
Whenyouaresittingnearatree,itiseasytofeelGod. When you are sitting on an asphalt road, you can go on searching on the asphalt road... you will not find God. It is too HARD. When you are in a moderncity,justcementandconcretebuildingsallaround,inthejungleofcementandconcreteyou will not feel God - because man-made things don't grow. That is one of the problems: man-made things don't grow - they are dead, they don't have any life. God-made things grow. Even mountains grow!TheHimalayasarestillgrowing,stillgettinghigherandhigher. Atreegrows,achildgrows.
Man-made things don't grow - even the greatest. Even a painting of a Picasso will never grow. So what to say about a cement, concrete building? Even the music of Beethoven will never grow, so what to say about technology, about man-made machines?
Watch! Wherever you see growth, there is God - because only God grows, nothing else. In everything only God grows. When a new leaf is coming in the tree, it is God coming out of the tree. When the bird is on the wing, it is God on the wing. When you see a small girl laughing or a small boy giggling, it is God giggling. When you see tears flowing from the eyes of a woman or a man,itisGodcrying.
WHEREVER you find aliveness, yes, there is God. Listen carefully. Come closer. Feel carefully. Be cautious! you are on holy ground.
Tantra says: If you drop your blinkers - mm? - that's what Tantra means by'unpatterned' life-style
If you drop your blinkers, if you start opening your eyes as wide as they are destined to be, suddenly you will see that you can see in all directions. You have been befooled by the society to look only in certain directions. The society has converted you into a slave.
There is a great conspiracy. Each small child is damaged - immediately, the moment he is born, the societystartsdamaging him. So before he becomesalert'he isaslave and crippled, crippled in a thousand and one ways. When a person is crippled, he will have to depend on the family, on the society, on the state, on the government, on the police, on the army - he will have to depend on a thousand and one things. And because of that dependence he will be a slave always, he will never become a free man. So the society cripples - cripples in such subtle ways - and you don't know. Before you are able to know anything, you are already crippled.
Tantra says: Regain health! Undo whatsoever the society has done to you! By and by, become alert and start undoing the impressions that society has forced upon you - and start living your life. It is your life, it is nobody else's business. It is utterly your life. It is God's gift to YOU, a personal gift to you, with yourinitialson it. You enjoy it, youliveit! And even ifyouhave to paymuch forit, itisworth paying. Even ifsometimesyouhave to pay for yourlife with your life, thattoo is perfectly good.
Tantraisveryrebellious. Itbelievesin a totally different kind ofsociety, which will notbepossessive, which will not be money-oriented, which will not be power-oriented. It believes in a different kind of family, whichwillnotbepossessive, and which will not be life-negative. Our families are life-negative.
Achild isborn andthewholefamilytriestokillall joyoflife. Wheneverthechildisjoyful, he is wrong; and whenever he is sad and long-faced and sitting in the corner, everything is okay. The father says, ”Good! Very good boy.” The mother is very happy because he is no trouble. Whenever the child is alive, there is danger - and everybody is trying to kill the joy of the child.
And basically all joy is related to sexuality. And the society and the family are so afraid of sex that they cannot allow the children to be sexually joyful - and that is the BASE of all joy! They are VERY restrictive: the children are not allowed even to touch their genital organs, they cannot play with them. The father is afraid, the mother is afraid... everybody is afraid! Their fear comes from their own parents; they are neurotic.
Have you not seen? A child is playing with his genital organs and immediately everybody jumps on him: ”Stop! Don't do that again!” And he is not doing anything - he is simply enjoying his body, and naturally the sex organs are the most sensitive, most alive, most pleasurable. Suddenly, something is cut in the child. He becomes afraid. Something in his energy is blocked. Now, whenever he feels happy he will feel guilty too; now guilt has been put inside him. And whenever he feels guilty he will feel that he is a sinner, he is doing something wrong.
This is my observation of thousands of sannyasins: whenever they are happy, they start feeling guilty. They start looking for the parent who must be somewhere around, and who will say ”Stop! What are you doing?” Whenever they are sad, everything is okay. Sadness is accepted, misery is accepted - joy is denied.
And the children are somehow prevented from knowing the joys of life. The father and mother are making love-children knowit. Theyhearthesounds;sometimestheyfeel thatitishappening -but they are not allowed to participate in it, not allowed even to be there. It is ugly, it is destructive. The children should participate. When the father and mother are making love, the children should play around; they should feel happy with father and mother making love. They should know that love is a beautiful phenomenon -notanything ugly, nothing to be made private, nothing to hide, nothing to be kept secret. It is not a sin! It is a JOY.
And if the children can see their father and mother making love, thousands of sexual diseases will disappear from the world - because their joy will erupt. And they will feel respectful towards the father and the mother. Yes, one day they will also make love, and they will know that it is a great celebration. If they can see father and mother making love as if they are praying and meditating, there will be a great impact.
Tantra says that, that love should be made with such celebration, with such great religious awe, reverence, that the children can feel that something great is happening. Their joy will grow - AND there will not be any guilt in their joy. This world can be tremendously happy. But this world is not happy. It is very rare to come across a happy man, very very rare. And only the happy man is sane. The unhappy man is insane.
Tantra has a different vision, a totally, radically different vision of life. You CAN become a bee. In freedom you become a bee. A slave, you are a frog. Free, you are a bee.
Listen to themessage offreedom. Get ready to be free. About everything that creates bondage you have to be alert and beware.
The second question:
Question 2
I AM A SCHOOLMASTER, A SORT OF WATERED-DOWN MIXTURE OF PRIEST, POLITICIAN AND SCHOLAR - ALL THAT YOU ABHOR. IS THERE ANY HOPE FOR ME? ALSO I AM FIFTY- SIX - HAD I BEST JUST LIVE OUT THE REST OF THIS LIFE IN PATIENCE, AND HOPE FOR BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME?
NO HOPE FOR THE PRIEST, FOR THE POLITICIAN, FOR THE SCHOLAR not even in the next life! Butyou can dropbeing apriest, being apolitician, being ascholar, anymoment-and thereishope. But NO hope for the priest, no hope for the politician, no hope for the scholar. I am absolute about that. Even in the next life or next to next - never. I have never heard of any priest ever reaching Nirvana, never heard about any politician ever meeting God, never heard about any scholar ever becoming aware, knowing, wise. No, it is not possible.
The scholar believes in knowledge, not in knowing. Knowledge is from the outside; knowing is from the inside. The scholar trusts information. The information goes on collecting; it becomes a heavy load, but nothing grows inside. The inner reality remains the same - as ignorant as before.
The politician seeks power - it is an ego-trip. And those who arrive are humble people, not egoists. Egoists never arrive; by their very egoism they cannot arrive. Ego is the greatest barrier between you and God - the only barrier. So the politician cannot come.
And the priest... the priest is very cunning. He is trying to become a mediator between you and God, and he has not known God at all. He is the MOST deceptive, the most fraudulent. He is committing the greatest crime a man can commit: he is pretending that he knows God. Not only that: that he will make God available to you, that you come and follow him and he will take you to the ultimate. And hedoesnotknowanything of the ultimate! Hemayknowthe ritual, howto do the prayer, buthe does not know the ultimate. How can he lead you? He is a blind man, and when a blind man leads the blind, they both fall into the ditch.
No hope for the priest, no hope for the politician, no hope for the scholar - but there is hope, Anand Tejas, for you. The question is from Anand Tejas - there IS hope for you, EVERY hope for you.
And it is NOT a question of age. You may be fifty-six, or seventy-six, or a hundred and six - that doesn't matter. It is not a question of age because it is not a question of time. To enter into eternity, any moment is as right as any other moment - BECAUSE ONE ENTERS HERENOW! How does it make any difference how old you are? Fifty-six or sixteen - the sixteen-year-old has to enter right now, and the fifty-six-year-old has to enter right now; both have to enter right now. And the sixteen years are not helpful, neither are fifty-six years helpful. There are different problems for both; that I know. When a sixteen-year-old young man wants to enter into meditation or into God his problem is different from that of a man who is fifty-six. What is the difference? But if you weigh them finally the difference is quantitative, not qualitative.
The sixteen-year-old has only sixteen years of past; in that way he is in a better situation than the man who is fifty-six, he has a fifty-six years' past. He has a big load to drop, many attachments - fifty-six years of life, many experiences, much knowledge. The sixteen-year-old has not that much to drop. He has a little load, less luggage - a small suitcase - mm? - just a small boy's suitcase. The fifty-six-year-old has much luggage. This way the younger is in a better situation.
But there is another thing: the old man has no more future. A fifty-six-year-old, if he is going to be alive seventy years on the earth, has only fourteen yearsleft-no morefuture,no moreimagination, no more dreaming. There is not much space. Death is coming. The sixteen-year-old has a long future, much imagination, many dreams.
The past is small but the future is big for the young; for the old, the past is big, the future is small - on the whole it is the same. It is seventy years: both have to drop seventy years. For the young, sixteen years in the past, remaining years in the future. The future has also to be dropped as much as the past. So finally, in the final reckoning, there is no difference.
There is every hope for you, Anand Tejas. And because you have asked the question, the work has already started. You have become alert about your priest, politician, scholar - that's good. To become aware of a disease, to know what it is, is half the treatment.
And you have become a sannyasin, you have taken a step into the unknown already. If you are going to be with me, you will have to say goodbye to your priest, your politician, your scholar. But I feel confident that you can do it, otherwise you would not have even asked. You have felt that it is meaningless, all that you have been doing up to now is meaningless - you have felt it. That feeling is of tremendous value.
So I will not say just be patient and wait for the next life, no. I am never in favour of postponement. Allpostponementisdangerousand isverytricky. Ifyou say,”Iwillpostpone in this life - nothing can be done,”you are avoidingasituation. Everythingcan be done! You are simply pretending. And this is a trick to save: ”Now what can be done? I am so old.”
Even on the deathbed, at the last moment, the change can happen. Even when the person is dying, he can open his eye for a single MOMENT... and the change can happen. And he can drop the whole past before death comes in, and he can die utterly fresh. And he is dying in a new way - he is dying as a sannyasin. He is dying in deep meditation - and to die in deep meditation is not to die at all, because he will be dying with full awareness of the deathless.
Itcan happen in asingle moment! So please don'tpostpone. Don't say: ”Had Ibestjustlive outthe rest of this life in patience...?” No. You drop it right now - it is worthless! Why carry it? Why wait? And ifyou wait, the nextlife is notgoing tobe anydifferent-that'swhyIsay there is nohope forthe priest and the politician and the scholar. The next life will start from where you end this life. Again the priest, again the politician, again the scholar. You will have the next life in continuity with this life. Howis itgoing to be different? Itwill be the same wheel turning again.
And this time I am available to you. Who knows? next time I may not be available. This time, somehow, groping in the dark, you have stumbled upon me. Next time, one never knows This
time you took fifty-six years to come to a man through whom revolution IS possible. Who knows? next time you may become more burdened, certainly you will become more burdened - the past life's burden, and the next life's burden... you may take seventy years to come, or to find a man.
That's why I say there is no hope for the politician and the priest and the scholar in the future either. Butforyou there is every hope - because YOU ARE NOT A PRIEST, and you are notascholar, and you are not a politician. How can you be? These are things that gather around, but the innermost core remains always free. Don't think of yourself in terms of being a frog - be a bee
The third question:
Question 3
WHATROLESHOULDCHARITYPLAYINTHELIFEOFA SANNYASIN?
THE QUESTION IS NOT FROM A SANNYASIN - it is from Philip Martin. The first thing, Philip Martin, become a sannyasin. You should not ask questions about others; that is not gentlemanly. You should ask questions about yourself. Be a sannyasin and then ask. But the question is meaningful so I am going to answer it anyway. And I have the feeling that sooner or later Philip Martin will be a sannyasin. Even the question shows some leaning.
First thing: all the religions of the world have emphasized charity - DHAN - too much. And the reason is that man has always felt guilty with money. Charity has been preached so much to help man feel a little less guilty. You will be surprised: in old English there is a word'gilt' - g-i-l-t - which means money. In German there is a word'Geld' - g-e-l-d - which means money. And the gold is very close by!'Gilt','guilt','Geld','gold' somehow deep down a great guilt is involved in money.
Whenever you have money you feel guilty... and it is natural because so many people don't have money. How can you avoid guilt? Whenever you have money you know somebody has become poorerbecauseofyou. Wheneveryouhavemoney, youknowsomewheresomebodywillbestarving - and your bank balance goes on becoming bigger and bigger. Some child will not get the medicine needed to survive. Some woman will not get the medicine; some poor man will die because he will not have food. How can you avoid these things? They will be there. The more money you have, the more these things will be there erupting in your consciousness; you will feel guilty.
Charity is to unburden you from your guilt, so you say, ”I am doing something: I going to open a hospital, going to open a college. I give money to this charity fund, to that trust ” You feel a little
happier. The world has lived in poverty, the world has lived in scarcity, ninety-nine percent of people have lived a poor life, almost starving and dying, and only one percent of people have lived with richness, with money - they have always felt guilty. To help them, the religions developed the idea of charity. It is to rid them of their guilt.
So the first thing I would like to say is: Charity is not a virtue; it is just a help to keep your sanity intact, otherwise you will go insane. Charity is not a virtue - it is not a PUNYA. It is not that you have done something good when you do charity. It is only that you repent for all the bad that you have done in accumulating the money. To me, charity is not a great quality - it is repentance, you are repenting. Onehundredrupeesyouhaveearned,tenrupeesyougiveincharity-itisarepentance. You feel a little good; you don't feel THAT bad; your ego feels a little more protected. You can say to God, ”Not only was I exploiting, I was also helping poor people.” But what type of help is this? On one hand you snatch one hundred rupees, and on the other hand you give ten rupees - not even the interest!
Thisisatrickthatwasinvented bythe so-called religiouspeople to help NOT THE POOR BUT THE RICH.Letitbeabsolutelyclear:thisisMYattitude-ithasbeenatricktohelptherichnotthepoor. If the poor were helped, that was just a consequence of it, a by-product, but that was not the goal of it.
What do I say to my sannyasins?
I don't talk about charity. That word seems ugly to me. I talk about sharing - and with a totally different quality in it: sharing. If you have, you share. Not because by sharing you will be helping others, no, but by sharing you will be growing. The more you share, the more you grow.
And the more you share, the more you have - whatsoever it is. It is not only a question of money. If you have knowledge, share it. If you have meditation, share it! If you have love, share it. WHATSOEVER you have, share it, spread it all over; let it spread like the fragrance of a flower going to the winds. It has nothing to do particularly with poor people. Share with anybody that is available... and there are different types of poor people.
A rich man may be poor because he has never known any love. Share love with him. A poor man may have known love but has not known good food - share food with him. A rich man may have everything and has no understanding - share your understanding with him; he is also poor. There are a thousand and one types of poverty. Whatsoever you have, share it.
Butremember,IamnotsayingthisisavirtueandGodisgoingtogiveyouaspecialplaceinheaven, thatyouwillbespeciallytreated,thatyouwillbethoughtaVIP-no. Bysharingherenowyouwillbe happier. A hoarder is never a happy man. A hoarder is basically constipated. He goes on hoarding; he cannot relax; he cannot give. He goes on hoarding; whatsoever he gets, he simply hoards it. He never enjoys it, because even in enjoying it you have to share it - because all enjoyment is a sort of sharing.
If you want to really enjoy your food, you will have to call friends. If you REALLY want to enjoy food, you will have to invite guests; otherwise you will not be able to enjoy it. If you really want to enjoy drinking, how can you enjoy it alone in your room? You will have to find friends, other drunkards. You will have to share!
Joy is always a sharing. Joy does not exist alone.
How can you be happy alone? absolutely alone - think! HOW can you be happy, absolutely alone? No. Joy is a relationship. It is a togetherness. In fact, even those people who have moved.to the mountains and have lived an alone life, they also share with existence - not alone. They share with the stars and the mountains and the birds and the trees - they are not alone.
Just think! For twelve years Mahavir was standing in the jungles alone - but he was not alone. I say to you, on authority, he was not alone. The birds were coming and playing around, and the animals would come and sit around, and the trees would shower their flowers on him, and the stars would come, and the sun would rise. And the day and the night, and summer and winter... and the whole year around... it was joy! Yes, he was away from human beings - he had to be, because human beings had done so much damage to him that he needed to be away from them so that he could be healed. It was just to avoid human beings for a certain period so they didn't go on damaging him. That's why sannyasins have moved sometimes into aloneness - just to heal their wounds. Otherwise people will go on poking their knives into your wounds and they will keep them green; they will not allow you to heal, they will not give you a chance to undo what they have done.
For twelve years Mahavir was silent: standing, sitting, with the rocks and the trees, but he was not alone -hewascrowded bythewhole existence. Thewholeexistence wasmerging upon him. Then the day came when he was healed, his wounds cured, and now he knew nobody could harm him. He had gone beyond. No human being could hurt him any more. He came back to relate to human beings, to SHARE the joy that he had attained there.
Jain scriptures talk only about the fact that he left the world, they don't talk about the fact that he came back into the world; that is only half the story, that is not the full story.
Buddha went into the forest, but he came back. How can you go on being there when you HAVE it? You will have to come back and share it. Yes, it is good to share with trees, but trees cannot understand that much. Theyareverydumb. Itisgood tosharewith animals;theyare beautiful -but the beauty of a human dialogue, it is impossible to find anywhere else. The response, the human response! They HAD to come back! to the world, to human beings, to share their joy, their bliss, their ecstasy.
'Charity' is not a good word. It is a very loaded word. I talk about sharing. To my sannyasins I say share. In the word'charity'there issome uglinessalso: itseemsthatyouare having theupperhand and the other is lower than you, that the other is a beggar; that you are helping the other, that he is in need. That is not good. To look at the other as if he is lower than you - you have and he has not - is not good; it is inhuman.
Sharing gives a totally different perspective. It is not a question of whether the other has it or not. Thequestionisthatyouhavegotittoomuch -youhavetoshare. When yougivecharity, you expect the other to thank you. When you share, you thank him that he allowed you to pour your energy - which was getting too much upon you, it was getting heavy. You feel grateful.
Sharing is out of your abundance. Charity is for others' poverty. Sharing is out of your richness. There is a qualitative difference.
No, I don't talk about charity, but sharing. Share! Whatsoever you have, share... and it will grow. That is a fundamental law: the more you give, the more you get. Never be a miser in giving.
The fourth question:
Question 4
DURING THE MEDITATIONS, MY MIND STILL GOES FIVE HUNDRED MILES PER HOUR. I NEVER EXPERIENCE SILENCE, AND WHATEVER WITNESSING HAPPENS IS VERY SHORT, LIKE FLASHES. AM I WASTING MY TIME?
YOUR MIND IS MIGHTY SLOW. Five hundred miles per hour, only?! And do you think this is speed? Mightyslowyouare. Mindknowsnospeeditgoessofast. Itisfasterthanlight. Light travels 186,000 miles is one second. Mind is faster than that. But nothing to be worried - that is the beauty of the mind, that is a great quality! Rather than taking it negatively, rather than fighting with it, befriend the mind.
You say: ”During the meditations, my mind still goes five hundred miles per hour” - let it go! Let it go faster. You be a watcher. You watch the mind going around so fast, with such speed. Enjoy this! enjoy this play of the mind.
In Sanskrit we have a special term for it; we call it CHIDVILAS - the play of consciousness. Enjoy it! this play of mind rushing towards stars, moving so fast from here and there, jumping all over existence. What is wrong in it? Let it be a beautiful dance. Accept it.
My feeling is that what you are doing is you are trying to stop it - you cannot do that. Nobody can stop the mind! Yes, mind stops one day, but nobody can stop it. Mind stops, but that is not out of your effort. Mind stops out of your understanding.
You just WATCH and try to see what is happening, why this mind is rushing. It is not rushing without any reason. You must be ambitious. Try to see WHY this mind is rushing, where it is rushing - you must be ambitious. If it thinks about money, then try to understand. Mind is not the question. You start dreaming about money, that you have won a lottery or this and that, and then you even start planning how to spend it, what to purchase and what not. Or, the mind thinks you have become a president, a prime minister, and then you start thinking what to do now, how to run the country, or the world. Just WATCH the mind! what mind is going towards. There must be a deep seed in you. You cannot stop the mind unless that seed disappears.
Themindissimplyfollowingtheorderofyourinnermostseed. Somebodyisthinkingaboutsex;then somewhere there is repressed sexuality. Watch where mind is rushing. Look deep into yourself, find where the seeds are.
I have heard:
The parson was very much worried. ”Listen,”hesaidtohisverger, ”somebody has stolen my bicycle.”
”Where have you been on it, Rector?” inquired that worthy.
”Only round the parish on my calls.”
The verger suggested that the best plan would be for the rector to direct his Sunday sermon to the ten commandments. ”When you getto'Thou shaltnotsteal', you and Iwill watch the faces -we will soon see.”
Sundaycame, therectorstartedinfineflowaboutthecommandments, thenlosthisthread, changed his subject, and trailed off lamely.
”Sir,” said the verger, ”I thought you were going to...”
”I know, Giles, I know. But you see, when I got to'Thou shalt not commit adultery' I suddenly remembered where Ihad leftmybicycle.”
Just see where you have left your bicycle. The mind is rushing for certain reasons. The mind needs understanding, awareness. Don't try to stop it. If you try to stop it, in the first place you cannot succeed; in the second place, IF YOU CAN succeed - one can succeed if one makes perseverant effort for years - if YOU CAN succeed, you will become dull. No satori will happen out of it.
In the first place, you cannot succeed; and it is good that you cannot succeed. If you CAN succeed, if you manage to succeed, that will be very unfortunate - you will become dull, you will lose intelligence. With that speed there is intelligence, with that speed there is continuous sharpening of the sword of thinking, logic, intellect. Please don't try to stop it. I am not in favour of dullards, and I am not here to help anybody to become stupid.
In the name of religion, many people have become stupid, they have almost become idiots - just trying to stop the mind without any understanding about why it is going with such speed... why in the first place? The mind cannot go without any reason. Without going into the reason, in the layers, deep layers of the unconscious, they just try to stop. They CAN stop, but they will have to pay a price, and the price will be that their intelligence will be lost.
You can go around India, you can find thousands of sannyasins, mahatmas; look into their eyes - yes, they are good people, nice, but stupid. If you look in their eyes there is no intelligence, you will not see any lightning. They are uncreative people; they have not created anything. They just sit there. They are vegetating, they are not alive people. They have not helped the world in ANY way. They have not even produced a painting or a poem or a song, because even to produce a poem you will need intelligence, you will need certain qualities of the mind.
I would not suggest that you stop the mind; rather, that you understand. With understanding there happens a miracle. The miracle is that with understanding, by and by, when you understand the causes and those causes are looked into deeply, and through that looking deeply into those causes, those causes disappear, mind slows down. But intelligence is not lost, because mind is not forced.
What are you doing if you don't remove the causes by understanding? You are driving a car, for example, and you go on pressing the accelerator and at the same time you try to press the brake. You will destroy the whole mechanism of the car. And there is every possibility you will have some accident. This cannot be done together. If you are pushing the brake, then leave the accelerator; don'tpush it any more. Ifyouarepushing the accelerator, then don'tpush thebrake. DON'Tdoboth thethingstogether, otherwise you will destroy the whole mechanism; you are doing two contradictory things.
Ambition you carry on - and you try to stop the mind? Ambition creates the speed, so you are accelerating the speed - and putting a brake on the mind. You will destroy the whole subtle mechanism of the mind, and mind is a very delicate phenomenon, the most delicate in the whole of existence. So don't be foolish about it.
There is no need to stop it.
You say: ”I never experience silence, and whatever witnessing happens is very short, like flashes.”
Feel happy! Even that is something of tremendous value. Those flashes, they are not ordinary flashes. Don't just take them for granted! There are millions of people for whom even those small glimpses have not happened. They will live and die and they will never know what witnessing is - even for a single moment. You are happy, you are fortunate.
But you are not feeling grateful. If you don't feel grateful, those flashes will disappear. Feel grateful - they will grow. With gratitude, everything grows. Feel happy that you are blessed - they will grow. With that positivity, things will grow.
”And whatever witnessing happens is very short.”
Letitbeveryshort! Ifitcan happen forasinglesplitmoment, it is happening; you will have the taste of it. And with the taste, by and by, you will create more and more situations in which it happens more and more.
”Am I wasting my time?”
Youcannotwastetime, becauseyoudon'tpossesstime. Youcanwastesomethingthatyoupossess. Time you don't possess. Time will be wasted anyway whether you meditate or not - time will be wasted. Time is rushing by. Whatsoever you do, do anything, or don't do anything, time is going. You cannot save time so how can you waste time? You can waste only something which you can save.
You don't possess time. Forget about it!
Andthebestuseyoucanhaveoftimeistohavethesesmallglimpses-becausefinallyyouwillcome to see only those moments have been saved which were moments of witnessing, and all else has gone down the drain. The money that you earned, the prestige that you earned, the respectability that you earned, is all gone down the drain. Only those few moments that you had some flashes of witnessing, only those moments are saved. Only those moments will go with you when you leave this life - only those moments can go, because those moments belong to eternity, they don't belong to time.
But feel happy it is happening. It always happens slowly, slowly. But one drop by one drop a great ocean can become full. It happens in drops. But in the drops the ocean is coming. You just receive it with gratitude, with celebration, with thankfulness.
And don't try to stop the mind. Let the mind have its speed - you watch.
The fifth question:
Question 5
HOW CAN THE SEX ENERGY BE TRANSFORMED INTO SAMADHI?
TANTRA AND YOGA HAVE A CERTAIN MAP OF THE INNER MAN. Itwillbegoodifyou understand that map - it will help you, it will help you greatly.
Tantra and Yoga suppose that there are seven centers in man's physiology - the subtle physiology, not in the body. In fact, they are metaphors. But they are very very helpful to understand something of the inner man. These are the seven chakras.
First, and the most basic, is MULADHAR - that's why it is called MULADHAR: MULADHAR means the most fundamental, the basic. MUL means the basic, of the roots. The muladhar chakra is the centerwhere sex energy is right now available, but the society has damaged thatchakraverymuch.
This muladhar chakra has three angles to it: one is oral the mouth; the second is anal and the third is genital. These are the three angles of the muladhar. The child starts his life with the oral, and because of wrong upbringing, many people remain at the oral, they never grow. That's why so much smoking, chewing gum, continuous eating, happens. Thisisan oralfixation they remain in the mouth.
There are many primitive societies which don't kiss. In fact, if the child has grown well, kissing will disappear; kissing shows the man has remained oral. Otherwise, what does sex have to do with lips? When for the first time primitive societies came to know about civilized man's kissing, they laughed; they simply thought it ridiculous. Two persons kissing each other: it looks unhygienic too; just transferring all sorts of illnesses to each other, infections. And what are they doing? And for what? But humanity has remained oral.
The child is not satisfied orally. The mother does not give her breast as much as the child needs; the lips remain unsatisfied. So the child will smoke cigarettes later on, will become a great kisser. will chew gum, or will become a great eater. continuously eating this and that. If mothers give their breasts as much as the child needs, then the muladhar is not damaged.
If you are a smoker, try a pacifier - and you will be suddenly surprised. It has helped many people. I give it to many people. If somebody comes and asks me how to stop smoking, I say, Just have a pacifier, a false breast, and keep it in the mouth. Let it hang around your neck, and whenever you feel like smoking just put the pacifier in the mouth and enjoy it. And within three weeks you will be surprised: the urge to smoke has disappeared.”
Somewhere the breast is still appealing. That's why man is so much focussed on feminine breasts. There seems to be no reason... why'? Whyismansomuchinterestedinfemininebreasts? Painting, sculpture, film, pornography-everything seems to be breast-oriented! Andwomen arecontinuously trying to hide and yet show their breasts - otherwise, the bra is just foolish. It is a trick to hide and show together; it is a very contradictory trick. And now in America, where every foolish thing goes to its extreme, they are injecting chemicals into women's breasts, silicon and other things; they are stuffing breasts with silicon so they become bigger and can get the shape - the shape that ungrown-up humanity wants to see. This childish idea! But man remains somehow oral.
This is the LOWEST state of the muladhar.
Then a few people change from oral and they become stuck at the anal, because the second great damage happens with the toilet training. Children are forced to go to the toilet at a certain time. Now, children cannot control their bowel movements; it takes time, it takes years for them to come to a control. So what do they do? They simply force, they simply close their anal mechanism, and because of this they become anal fixated.
That's why so much constipation exists in the world. It is only man who suffers from constipation. No animal suffers from constipation; in the wild state no animal suffers from constipation. Constipation is more psychological; it is a damage to the muladhar. And because of constipation many other things grow into the human mind.
Amanbecomesahoarder-ahoarderofknowledge, hoarderofmoney, hoarderofvirtue-becomes a hoarder and becomes miserly. He cannot leave anything! Whatsoever he grabs, he holds it. And with this anal emphasis, a great damage happens to muladhar because the man or the woman has to go to the genital. If they get fixated at the oral or at the anal, they never go to the genital - that is the trick the society has used up to now not to allow you to become fully sexual.
Then anal fixation becomes so important that genitals become less important. Hence, so much homosexuality. Homosexuality will not disappear from the world - until and unless anal-orientation disappears. The toilet-training is a great, dangerous training. And then, if some people become genital, somehow they are not fixated at the oral and the anal and become genital, then there is great guilt created in humanity about sex. Sex means the sin. Christianity has thought sex so much a sin that they go on pretending and proposing and trying to prove a foolish thing, that Christ was born out of a miracle: that he was not born out of a man/woman relationship, that Mary was a virgin. Sex is such a sin that how can Jesus' mother have sex? It is okay for other ordinary people, but for Jesus' mother to have sex - then how can Jesus, such a pure man, be born out of sex?
I was reading:
There was a young woman whodidnotseem verywell, sohermothertookhertothedoctor. Mother did all the talking - she was that sort.
”She's pregnant,” said the doctor.
”Doctor, I must call you a fool. My daughter has never so much as kissed a man! have you darling?”
”No, mama, I have not even held a man's hand.”
The doctor left his chair, walked to the window, and gazed at the sky. There was a long silence, then mother asked, ”Is there anything wrong out there, doctor?”
”Not at all, not at all. Only the last time this happened, a star appeared in the east - and I don't want to miss it this time!”
Sex has been condemned so much, you cannot enjoy it. And that's why energy remains fixated somewhere: oral, anal, genital. It cannot go upwards.
Tantra says man has to be relieved, destructured from these three things. So Tantra says that the first great work has to happen in the muladhar. For oral freedom: screaming, laughing, shouting, crying, weeping, is very helpful. That's why my choice of encounter, gestalt, primal and that type of groups - they are all helpful to relieve the oral fixation. And to relieve you of the anal fixation, PRANAYAM, BASTRIKA - fast chaotic breathing - is very helpful, because it hits directly on the anal center and makes you able to relieve and relax the anal mechanism. Hence the dynamic meditation is of tremendous value.
And then the sex center: the sex center has to be relieved of the burden of guilt, condemnation. You have to start relearning about it; only then can the damaged sex center function in a healthy way. You have to start relearning to enjoy it - without any guilt.
There are a thousand and one types of guilt. In the Hindu mind there is a fear that semen energy is great energy - even if a single drop is lost, you are lost. This is a very constipatory attitude - hoard it! Nothing is lost! You are such a dynamic force, you go on creating that energy every day. Nothing is lost.
TheHindumindistoomuchobsessedwithVEERYA-withsemenenergy. Notasingledropshould be lost! They are continuously afraid. So whenever they make love, if they make love, then they feel very much frustrated, very much depressed, because they start thinking so much energy is lost. NOTHING is lost. You don't have a dead quota of energy; you are a dynamo - you create energy, you create it EVERY day. In fact, the more you use it, the more you have it. It functions like the whole body. If you use your muscles, they will grow. If you walk, your legs will be strong. If you run, you will have more energy to run. Don't think that a person who has never run and suddenly runs will have energy - he will not have energy. He will not have even the musculature to run.
Use all that has been given to you by God and you will have MORE of it!
So there is one Hindu madness: to hoard. This is on the lines of constipation. And now there is an American madness, that is like diarrhoea: just throw, go on throwing - meaningfully, meaninglessly, go on throwing. So even a man of eighty years continuously thinks in childish ways. Sex is good, sex is beautiful, but is not the end. It is the alpha but not the omega. One has to go beyond it. But going beyond it is NOT A CONDEMNATION! One has to go through it to go beyond it.
Tantra is the most healthy attitude about sex. It says sex is good, sex is healthy. sex is natural, but sex has more possibilities than just reproduction. And sex has more possibilities than just fun. Sex is carrying something of the ultimate in it, of Samadhi.
The muladhar chakra has to be relaxed - relaxed from constipation, relaxed from diarrhoea. The muladhar chakra has to function at the optimum, one hundred percent, then energy starts moving.
The second chakra is SVADHISTHAN - that is the HARA, the death center. These two centers are very much damaged, because man has been afraid of sex and man has been afraid of death. So death has been avoided: Don't talk about death! Just forget about it! It does not exist. Even if sometimes it exists, don't notice it, don't take any note of it. Go on thinking that you are going to live for ever - avoid death!
Tantrasays:Don'tavoidsexanddon'tavoiddeath. That'swhySarahawenttothecremationground to meditate - not to avoid death. And he went with the arrowsmith woman to live a life of healthy, full sex, of optimum sex. On the cremation ground, living with a woman, these two centers had to be relaxed: death and sex. Once you accept death and you are not afraid of it, once you accept sex and you are not afraid of it, your two lower centers are relaxed.
And those are the two lower centers which have been damaged by the society, badly damaged. Once they are relieved... theotherfivecentersarenotdamaged;thereisnoneedtodamagethem because people don't live in those other five centers. These two centers are naturally available. Birth has happened: the sex center - muladhar. And death is going to happen: svadhisthan the second center. These two things are there in everybody's life, so society has destroyed both centers and tried to manipulate man, dominate man, through these two things.
Tantra says: Meditate while you make love, meditate while somebody dies - go, watch, see. Sit by the side of a dying man. Feel, participate in his death. Go in deep meditation with the dying man. And when a man is dying there is a possibility to have a taste of death - because when a man is dying, he releases so much energy from the svadhisthan chakra... he has to release because he is dying. The whole repressed energy on the svadhisthan chakra will be released because he is dying; without releasing it he will not be able to die. So when a man dies or a woman dies, don't miss the opportunity. If you are close by to a dying man, sit silently, meditate silently. When the man dies, in a sudden burst the energy will be all over, and you can have a taste of death. And that will give you a great relaxation: Yes, death happens, but nobody dies. Yes, death happens, but in fact death never happens.
While making love, meditate so that you can know that something of Samadhi penetrates into sexuality. And while meditating on death, go deep into it so that you can see that something of the deathless enters into death. These two experiences will help you to go upwards very easily. The otherfivecenters,fortunately,arenotdestroyed;theyareperfectlyintune-justenergyhastomove through them. If these first two centers are helped, energy starts moving. So let death and love be your two objects of meditation.
The last question:
Question 6
BELOVED OSHO, IS 'OSHO' GOING TO BE LIKE THE COCA-COLA ADVERTISEMENT ALL OVER THE WORLD?
Why not...?





 

29 April 1977 am in Buddha Hall
WHEN (IN WINTER) STILL WATER BY THE WIND IS STIRRED, IT TAKES (AS ICE) THE SHAPE AND TEXTURE OF A ROCK.
WHEN THE DELUDED ARE DISTURBED BY INTERPRETATIVE THOUGHTS, THAT WHICH IS AS YET UNPATTERNED TURNS VERY HARD AND SOLID. MIND IMMACULATE IN ITS VERY BEING, CAN NEVER BE
POLLUTED BY SAMSARA'S OR NIRVANA'S IMPURITIES.
A PRECIOUS JEWEL DEEP IN MUD
WILL NOT SHINE, THOUGH IT HAS LUSTER.
KNOWLEDGE SHINES NOT IN THE DARK, BUT WHEN THE DARKNESS IS ILLUMINED, SUFFERING DISAPPEARS (AT ONCE).
SHOOTS GROW FROM THE SEED AND LEAVES FROM THE SHOOTS.
HE WHO THINKS OF THE MIND IN TERMS OF ONE
OR MANY, CASTS AWAY THE LIGHTANDENTERSTHE WORLD.
INTO A (RAGING) FIRE HE WALKS WITH OPEN EYES -
WHO COULD BE MORE DESERVINGOF COMPASSION?
OH, THE BEAUTY OF EXISTENCE! The sheer delight of it! the joy, the song, and the dance! But we are not here. We appear to exist, but we are almost non-existential - because we have lost contact with existence, we have lost our roots in it. We are like an uprooted tree. The sap flows no more, the juice has dried up. No more flowers will come, or fruits. Not even birds come to take shelter in us.
We are dead! because we are not yet born. We have taken physical birth as our birth; that is not our birth. We are still existing as potentialities; we have not become actual. Hence the misery. The actual is blissful, the potential is miserable. Why is it so? Because the potential cannot be at rest. The potential is continuously restless - it HAS to be restless. Something is going go happen. It hangs in the air. It is in limbo.
It is like a seed how can the seed rest and relax? The rest and relaxation is known only by the flowers. The seed HAS to be deep in anguish; the seed has to continuously tremble. The trembling is: whether he will be able to become actual? whether he will find the right soil? whether he will find the right climate? whether he will find the right sky? Is it going to happen? or will he simply die without being born? The seed trembles inside. The seed has anxiety, anguish. The seed cannot sleep; the seed suffers from insomnia.
The potential is ambitious, the potential longs for the future. Have you not watched this in your own being? that you are continuously longing for something to happen and it is not happening, that you are continuously hankering, hoping, desiring, dreaming... and it is not happening! And life goes on flowing by. Life goes on slipping out of your hands. And death comes closer, and you are not yet actual. Who knows? Which will come first? - actualization, realization, blossoming, or maybe death? Who knows? Hence the fear, the anguish, the trembling.
Soren Kierkegaard has said man is a trembling. Yes, man is a trembling because man is a seed. Friedrich Nietzsche has said man is a bridge. Exactly right! Man is not a place to rest! It is a bridge to pass over. Man isadoortogo through. Youcannotrestatbeing man. Man isnotabeing: man is an arrow on the way... a rope stretched between two eternities. Man is a tension. It is only man who suffers from anxiety, the only animal on the earth who suffers from anxiety. What can be the cause of it?
It is only man who exists as potentiality. A dog is actual; there is nothing else to happen. A buffalo is actual; there is nothing more it has already happened. Whatsoever could happen, has happened. You cannot say to a buffalo, ”You are not yet a buffalo” - that will be foolish. But you can say to man, ”You are not yet a man.” You can say to man, ”You are incomplete.” You cannot say to a dog, ”You are incomplete.” That will be stupid to say. All dogs are fully complete.
Man has a possibility, a future. Man is an opening. So the constant fear: whether we are going to make it or not? whether we are going to make it this time or not? How many times have we missed before? Are we going to miss again? That's why we are not happy. The existence goes on celebrating. There is great singing, there is great joy, there is great rejoicing! The whole existence is always in an orgy. It is a carnival. The whole existence at each moment is in an orgasm! Somehow man has become a stranger.
Man has forgotten the language of innocence. Man has forgotten how to relate with existence. Man has forgotten how to relate with himself! To relate with oneself means meditation. To relate with existence means prayer. Man has forgotten the very language. That's why we appear like strangers - strangers in our own home! strangers to ourselves. We don't know who we are, and we don't know why we are, and we don't know for what we go on existing. It seems to be an endless waiting... waitingfor Godot.
Nobody knows whether Godot is ever to come or not. In fact, who is this Godot? Nobody knows even that-butone hasto waitforsomething,so one creates some ideaand waitsforit. God isthat idea. Heaven is that idea. Nirvana is that idea. One has to wait because one has somehow to fill one's being, otherwise one feels very empty. Waiting gives a sense of purpose and a direction. You can feel good; at least you are waiting. It has not happened yet, but it is going to happen some day. What is it that is going to happen?
We have not even raised the right question. What to say about the right answer? We have NOT even asked the right question. And remember, once the right question is asked, the right answer is not very far away it is just by the corner. In fact, it is hidden in the right question itself. If you go on asking the right question, you will find the right answer through that very questioning.
So the first thing today that I would like to tell you isthatwearemissing,wearecontinuouslymissing - because we have taken mind as the language to relate with existence. And mind is a way to cut yourself off from existence. It is to put yourself off; it is not the way to put yourself on. THINKING IS THE BARRIER. Thoughts are like China Walls around you, and you are groping through the thoughts. You cannot touch reality. Not that reality is far away. God is just close by - just a prayer away at the most. But if you are doing something like thinking, brooding, analyzing, interpreting, philosophizing, then you start falling away and away and away, the further and further away you fall from reality - because the more thoughts you have,themoredifficultitistolookthrough them. They create a great fog. They create blindness.
This is one of the fundamentals of Tantra, that a thinking mind is a missing mind, that thinking is not the language to relate with reality. Then what is the language to relate with reality? Non-thinking. Words are meaningless with reality. Silence is meaningful. Silence is pregnant; words are just dead. One has to learn the language of silence.
And then something exactly like this happens: you were in your mother's womb you have forgotten about it completely, but for nine months you had not spoken a single word... but you were together, in deep silence. You were one with the mother; there was no barrier between you and the mother. You didn't exist as a separate self. In that deep silence, your mother and you were one. There was tremendousunity. Itwasnotunion,itwasunity. Youwerenottwo,soitwasnotunion -itwassimple unity You were not two.
The day you become silent again, the same happens: again you fall into the womb of existence; again you relate - you relate in a totally new way. Not exactly totally new, because you had known it in your mother's womb, but you have forgotten it. That's what I mean when I say man has forgotten the language to relate. That is the way: as you related with your mother in her womb - every vibe was conveyed to the mother; every vibe of the mother was conveyed to you. There was simple understanding; no misunderstanding existed between you and your mother. Misunderstanding comes only when thinking comes in.
How can you misunderstand somebody without thinking'? Can you? Can you misunderstand me if you don't think about me? How can you misunderstand? And how can you understand me if you think? Impossible. The moment you think, you have started interpreting. The moment you think, you are not looking at me; you are avoiding me. You are hiding behind your thoughts. Your thoughts come from your past. I am here present. I am a statement herenow, and you bring your past.
You must know about the octopus. When the octopus wants to hide, it releases black ink around itself, a cloud of black ink. Then nobody can see the octopus. It is simply lost in its own created cloud of black ink; it is its safety measure. Exactly the same is happening when you release a cloud of thoughts around you - you are lost into it. Then you cannot relate and nobody can relate to you. It is impossible to relate to a mind; you can relate only to a consciousness.
A consciousness has no past. A mind is just past and nothing else. So the first thing Tantra says is thatyou have tolearn thelanguage oforgasm. Again, when you aremaking lovetoawoman ortoa man, what happens? For a few seconds - it is very rare; it is becoming even rarer and rarer as man is becoming more and more civilized - for a few seconds again you are no more in the mind. With a shock you are cut off from the mind. In a jump you are outside the mind. For those few seconds of orgasm when you are out of the mind, you again relate. Again you are back in the womb... in the wombofyourwoman orin the wombofyourman. You are no more separate. Again there isunity - not union.
When you start making love to a woman, there is the beginning of a union. But when orgasm comes there is no union there is unity; the duality is lost. What happens in that deep, peak experience?
Tantra reminds you again and again that whatsoever happens in that peak moment is the language to relate with existence. Itisthelanguageoftheguts;itisthelanguageofyourverybeing. Soeither thinkin termsofwhen you werein thewombofyourmother, orthinkin termsofwhen you areagain lost into the womb of your beloved. And for a few seconds mind simply does not work!
Those moments of no-mind are your glimpses into Samadhi, glimpses of Satori, glimpses of God. We have forgotten that language and that language has to be learnt again. Love is the language.
The language of love is silent. When two lovers are really in deep harmony, in what Carl Jung used to call synchronicity, when their vibes are just synchronizing with each other, when they are both vibrating on the same wavelength, then there is silence, then lovers don't like to talk. It is only husbands and wives who talk. Lovers fall silent.
In fact, the husband and wife cannot keep silence because language is the way to avoid the other. If you are not avoiding the other, if you are not talking, it becomes very embarrassing, the presence ofthe other. The husband and wife immediatelyrelease theirink. Anything will do, but they release the ink around themselves; they are lostin the cloud, then there is no problem.
Languageisnotawaytorelatemoreorless, itisawaytoavoid. Whenyouarein deeploveyoumay hold the hand of your beloved, but you will be silent... utter silence, not a ripple. In that rippleless lakeofyourconsciousness, something is conveyed, themessageisgiven. Itisawordlessmessage.
Tantra says one has to learn the language of love, the language of silence, the language of each other's presence. the language of the heart, the language of the guts.
We have learnt a language which is not existential. We have learnt an alien language - utilitarian, of course; fulfills a certain purpose, of course; but as far as higher exploration of consciousness is concerned it is a barrier. On the lower level it is okay - in the marketplace of course you need a certain language: silence won't do. But as you move deeper and higher, language won't do.
JUST THE OTHER DAY, I was talking about the chakras; I talked about two *chak-ras: MULADHAR chakra and SVADHISTHAN chakra.'Muladhar' means the base, the root. It is the sex center, or you can call it the life center, the birth center. It is from muladhar that you are born. It is from your mother's muladhar and your father's muladhar that you have attained to this body. The next chakra was svadhisthan: it means the abode of the self - it is the death chakra. It is a very strange name to give to the death chakra: abode of the self, svadhisthan - where you exist really. In death? - yes.
When you die, you come to your pure existence - because only that dies which you are not. The body dies. The body is born out of the muladhar. When you die the body disappears, but you? -no. Whatsoever has been given by the muladhar is taken away by svadhisthan. Your mother and father have given you a certain mechanism - that is taken away in death. But you? - you existed even before yourfatherand motherhad known each other;youhave existed always.
Jesus says - somebody asks him about Abraham, what he thinks about the prophet Abraham, and he says: Abraham? Iam before Abraham everwas.
Abraham existed almost two thousand, three thousand years before Jesus, and he says: I am before Abraham was!
What is he talking about? As far as bodies are concerned, how can he be before Abraham? He is not talking about the body - he is talking about I-am-ness, his pure being... that is eternal.
This name, svadhisthan, is beautiful. It is exactly the center that in Japan is known as HARA. That's why in Japan suicide is called HARAKIRI - to die or to kill yourself through the hara center. This svadhisthan takes only that which has been given by the muladhar, but that which has been coming from eternity, your consciousness, is not taken away.
Hindus have been great explorers of the consciousness. They called it svadhisthan because when you die then you know who you are. Die in love and you will know who you are. Die in meditation and you will know who you are. Die to the past and you will know who you are. Die to the mind and you will know who you are. Death is the way to know.
In ancientdaysin India, theMasterwascalled THEDEATH -becauseyou havetodieintheMaster, the disciple has to die in the Master... only then does he come to knowwho he is.
These two centers have been very much poisoned by the society. These are the centers easily available to the society. Beyond these two are five more centers. The third is MANIPURA, the fourth is ANAHATA, the fifth is VISUDDHI, the sixth is AJNA, and the seventh is SAHASRAR.
The third center, manipura, is the center of all your sentiments, emotions. We go on repressing our emotionsin the manipura. Itmeansthe diamond -lifeisvaluable because of sentiments, emotions, laughter, crying, tears and smiles. Life is valuable because of all these things. These are the glory of life - hence the chakra is called manipura, the diamond chakra.
OnlymaniscapableofhavingTHISpreciousdiamond. Animalscannotlaugh;naturally, theycannot cry either. Tears are a certain dimension which is available to man only. The beauty of tears, the beauty of laughter; the poetry of tears and the poetry of laughter is available to man only. All other animals exist with only two chakras: muladhar and svadhisthan. They are born and they die; between the two there is nothing much. If you are also born and you die, you are an animal - you are not man yet. And many, millions of people exist only with these two chakras; they never go beyond them.
We have been taught to repress sentiments. We have been taught not to be sentimental. We have been taught sentimentality does not pay - be practical, be hard; don't be soft, don't be vulnerable! otherwise you will be exploited. Be hard! At least show that you are hard, at least pretend that you are dangerous, that you are not a soft being. Create fear around you. Don't laugh, because if you laugh you cannot create fear around you. Don't weep - if you weep you show that you are afraid yourself. Don't show your human limitations. Pretend that you are perfect.
Repress the third center and you become a soldier, not a man but a soldier - an army man, a false man.
Much work is done in Tantra to relax this third center. Emotions have to be relieved, relaxed. When you feel like crying you have to cry; when you feel like laughing you have to laugh. You have to drop this nonsense of repression, you have to learn expression - because only through your sentiments, your emotions, your sensitivity, do you come to that vibration through which communication is possible.
Have you not seen it? You can say as much as you want, and nothing is said; but a tear rolls down on your cheek and everything is said. A tear can say much more. You can talk for hours and it won't do, and a tearcan sayall. You can go on saying, ”Iam veryhappy, thisand that...”butyourface will show just the opposite. A little laughter, a real authentic laughter, and you need not say anything - the laughter says all. When you see your friend, your face beams, flashes with joy.
The third center has to be made more and more available. It is against thinking, so if you allow the third center you will relax in your tense mind more easily. Be authentic, sensitive; touch more, feel more, laugh more, cry more. And remember, you cannot do more than is needed; you cannot exaggerate. You cannot even bring a single tear more than is needed, and you cannot laugh more than is needed. So don't be afraid, and don't be miserly.
Tantra allows life all its emotions.
Thesearethethreelowercenters-lower,notinanysenseofevaluation-thesearethethreelower centers, lower rungs of the ladder.
Then comes the fourth center, the heart center, called anahata The word is beautiful.'ANAHATA' means unstruck sound it means exactly what Zen people mean when they say, ”Do you hear the sound of one hand clapping?” unstruck sound. The heart is just in the middle: three centers below it, three centers above it. And the heart is the door from the lower to the higher, or from the higher to the lower. The heart is like a crossroads.
And the heart has been completely bypassed. You have not been taught to be heartful. You have not even been allowed to go into the realm of the heart, because it is very dangerous. It is the center of the soundless sound; it is the non-linguistic center - unstruck sound. Language is struck sound; we have to create it with our vocal chords; it has to be struck - it is two hands clapping. The heart is one hand clapping. In the heart there is no word; it is wordless.
We have avoided the heart completely, we have bypassed it. We move in such a way in our being as if the heart does not exist - or, at the most, as if it is just a pumping mechanism for breathing, that's all. It is not. The lungs are not the heart. The heart is hidden deep behind the lungs. And it is not physical either. It is the place from where love arises. That's why love is not a sentiment. And sentimental love belongs to the third center, not to the fourth.
Love is not just sentimental. Love has more depth than sentiments; love has more validity than sentiments. Sentiments are momentary. More or less, the sentiment of love is misunderstood as the experience of love. One day you fall in love with a man or a woman, and the next day it is gone - and you call itlove. Itis notlove. Itis a sentiment: you liked the woman -liked, remember, notloved - it was a'like', just as you like icecream. It was a like. Likes come and go; likes are momentary; they cannot stay long; they don't have any capacity to stay long. You like a woman, you loved her, and finished! the like is finished. It is just like you liked ice-cream; you have eaten it - now you don't lookattheice-creamatall.Andifsomebodygoesongivingyoumoreice-cream,youwillsay,”Now it is nauseating - stop! I cannot take any more.”
Liking is not love. Never misunderstand liking for love, otherwise your whole life you will be just a driftwood...youwillbedriftingfromonepersontoanother;neverwillintimacygrow.
The fourth center, the anahata, is very significant, because it is in the heart that for the first time you were related to your mother. It was through the HEART that you were related to your mother, not through thehead. In deeplove, in deeporgasm, again you are related through theheart, not through the head. In meditation, in prayer, the same happens: you are related with existence through the heart - heart-to-heart. Yes, it is a dialogue heart-to-heart, not head-to-head. It is non-linguistic.
And the heart center is the center from where the soundless sound arises. If you relax into the heart center, you will hear OMKAR, AUM. That is a great discovery. Those who have entered the heart, they hear a continuous chanting inside their being which sounds like aum. Have you ever heard anything like a chanting which goes on by itself - not that you DO it.
That's why I am not in favour of mantras. You can go on chanting aum, aum, aum, and you can create a mental substitute for the heart. It is not going to help. It is a deception. And you can go on chanting for years, and you can create a false sound within yourself as if your heart is speaking - it is not. To know the heart you are not to chant aum - you have just to be silent. One day, suddenly the mantra is there. One day, when you have fallen silent, suddenly you hear the sound is coming from nowhere. It is arising out of you from the innermost core. It is the sound of your inner silence. Justasinasilentnight,thereisacertainsound,thesoundofthesilence,exactlylike.thatonavery, very much deeper level a sound arises in you.
It arises - let me remind you again and again - it is not that you bring it in; it is not that you repeat aum,aum. No,youdon'tsayasingleword. Youaresimplyquiet. Youaresimplysilent. And it bursts forthlikeaspring...suddenlyitstartsflowing,itisthere.Youhearit-youdon'tsayit,youhearit.
That is the meaning when Mohammedans say that Mohammed HEARD the Koran - that is the meaning. That is exactly what happens at the innermost core of your heart. Not that you say it: you hear it. Mohammed heard the Koran - he heard it happening inside. He was really puzzled; he had never heard anything like this. It was so unknown, it was so unfamiliar. The story says that he became ill. It was so weird! When suddenly, sitting in your room, if one day you start hearing inside aum, aum, or ANYTHING, you will start feeling, ”Am I going mad?” You are not saying it, nobody else is saying it. Are you going mad?
Mohammed was sitting on a hilltop when he heard it. He came back home trembling, perspiring; he had a high fever. He really became disturbed. He told his wife, ”Just bring all the blankets and cover me! I have never had such a trembling; a great fever has come to me.” But his wife could see that his face was illuminated: ”What type of fever is this? His eyes are burning, afire with something tremendously beautiful. A grace has entered with him in the house. A great silence has fallen over the house.” Even his wife started hearing something. She said to Mohammed,'l don't think it is a fever - I think God has blessed you. Don't be afraid! What has happened? Tell me!”
His wife was the first Mohammedan - Khadija was her name. She was the first convert. She said, ”I can SEE. God has happened to you, something has happened to you, something is flowing from yourheartall over the place. You have become luminous! You have never been like this - something extraordinary has happened. Tell me why you are so much worried and trembling. Maybe it is new, but you tell me.”
And Mohammed told her, very much afraid of what she would think, but she become converted - she was the first Mohammedan.
Ithashappenedsoalways. Hindus say the Vedas were recited by God Himself. Itsimplymeansthat they were heard. In India, for the holy scriptures we have a word; the word is SHRUTI - SHRUTI means that which has been heard.
At this center of the heart, anahata chakra, you hear. But you have not heard anything inside you - no sound, no omkar, no mantra. That simply means you have avoided the heart. The waterfall is there, and the sound of running water is there - but you have avoided it, you have bypassed, you have taken some other route, you have taken a shortcut. The shortcut simply goes from the third center avoiding the fourth. The fourth is the most dangerous center because it is the center out of which trust is born, faith is born. And the mind has to avoid it. If the mind does not avoid it, then there will be no possibility for doubt. Mind lives through doubt.
This is the fourth center. And Tantra says through love you will come to know this fourth center.
The fifth center is called VISUDDHI. Visuddhi means purity. Certainly, after love has happened there is purity and innocence - never before it. Only love purifies AND only love - nothing else purifies. Even the ugliest person in love becomes beautiful. Love is nectar. It cleanses all poisons. So the fifth chakra is called visuddhi - visuddhi means purity, absolute purity. It is the throat center.
And Tantra says: Only speak when you have come to the fifth center via the fourth - only speak through love, otherwise don't speak. Speak through compassion, otherwise don't speak! What is point of speaking? If you have come through the heart and if you have heard God speaking there or God running there like a waterfall, if you have heard the sound of God, the sound of one hand clapping, then you are allowed to speak, then your throat center can convey the message, then something can be poured even into words. When you HAVE it, it can be poured even into words.
Very few people come to the fifth center, very rarely - because they don't come to the fourth even, so how can they come to the fifth? It is very rare. Somewhere a Christ, a Buddha, a Saraha, they come to the fifth. The beauty of even their words is tremendous - what to say about their silence? Even their words carry silence. They speak and yet they speak not. They say and they say the unsayable, the ineffable, the inexpressible.
You also use the throat, but that is not visuddhi. That chakra is completely dead. When that chakra starts, your words have honey in them, then your words have a fragrance, then your words have a music to them, a dance. Then whatsoever you say is poetry, whatsoever you utter is sheer joy.
And the sixth chakra is AJNA - ajna means order. With the sixth chakra you are in order, never before it. With the sixth chakra, you become the master, never before it. Before it you were a slave. With the sixth chakra, whatsoeveryousay will happen, whatsoever you desire will happen. With the sixth chakra you have will, never before it. Before it, will exists not. But there is a paradox in it.
With the fourth chakra ego disappears. With the fifth chakra all impurities disappear, and then you have will - so you cannot harm through your will. In fact, it is no more your will: it is God's will, because the ego disappears at the fourth, all impurities disappear at the fifth. Now you are the purest being, just a vehicle, instrumental, a messenger. Now you have will because you are not - now God's will is your will.
Very rarely does a person come to this sixth chakra, because this is the last, in a way. In the world, this is the last. Beyond this is the seventh, but then you enter a totally different world, a separate reality. The sixth is the last boundary line, the checkpost.
The seventh is SAHASRAR - SAHASRAR means one-thousand-petalled lotus. When your energy moves to the seventh, sahasrar, you become a lotus. Now you need not go to any other flower for honey - now other bees start coming to you. Now you attract bees from the whole earth, or even sometimes from other planets bees start coming to you. Your sahasrar has opened, your lotus is in full bloom. This lotus is Nirvana.
The lowest is muladhar. From the lowest life is born - life of the body and the senses. With the seventh life is born - life eternal, not of the body, not of the senses. This is the Tantra physiology. It is not a physiology of the medical books. Please don't look for it in the medical books - it is not there. It is a metaphor, it is a way of speaking. It is a map to make things understandable. If you move this way, you will never come to that cloudedness of thoughts. If you avoid the fourth chakra, then you go into the head. Now, to be in the head means not to be in love; to be in thoughts means not to be in trust; to be thinking means not to be looking.
Now the sutras:
WHEN (IN WINTER) STILL WATER BY THE WIND IS STIRRED,
IT TAKES (AS ICE) THE SHAPE AND TEXTURE OF A ROCK.
WHEN THE DELUDED ARE DISTURBED BY INTERPRETATIVE THOUGHTS,
THAT WHICH IS AS YET UNPATTERNED TURNS VERY HARD AND SOLID.
Saraha says in WINTER - listen to each word, meditate on each word:
... IN WINTER STILL WATER BY THE WIND IS STIRRED,
IT TAKES AS ICE THE SHAPE AND TEXTURE OF A ROCK.
A SILENT LAKE WITHOUT ANY RIPPLES is the metaphor for consciousness - a silent lake without any ripples, waves, no stirring, no wind blowing - that is the metaphor for consciousness. The lake is liquid, flowing, silent; it is not hard, it is not like rock. It is soft like roseflowers, it is vulnerable. It can flow in any direction, it is not blocked. It has flow and it has life and it has dynamism, but nothing is disturbed - the lake is silent, peaceful. This is the state of consciousness.
IN WINTER...'winter' means when desires have arisen. Why call them'winter'? When desires arise you are in a cold desert land, because they never are fulfilled. Desires are a desert. They delude you, there is no fulfillment in them. They never come to any fruition - it is a desert land, and very cold, cold like death. No life flows through desires. Desires block life, they don't help life.
So Saraha says: WHEN IN WINTER... when desires have arisen in you, that is the climate of winter... STILL WATER BY THE WIND IS STIRRED... and thoughts come, a thousand and one thoughts from every direction, that is the symbol for wind. Winds are coming, stormy winds are coming. You are in a desire state, full of lust, ambition, becoming, and thoughts arise.
In fact, desires invite thoughts. Unless you desire, thoughts cannot come. Just start a desire and immediatelyyou will see thoughts have started coming. Just a moment before there was not a single thought, and then a car passes by and a desire has arisen: you would like to have this car. Now, a thousand and one thoughts, immediately they are there. Desire invites thought. So when there is desire, thoughts will come from every direction, winds will blow upon the lake of consciousness. And desire is cold, and thoughts go on stirring the lake.
WHEN IN WINTER STILL WATER BY THE WIND IS STIRRED,
IT TAKES AS ICE THE SHAPE AND TEXTURE OF A ROCK.
Mm? - then the lake starts becoming frozen. It starts becoming solid, rocklike. It loses fluidity. It becomes frozen. This is what in Tantra is called the mind. Meditate over it. The mind and consciousness are not two things but two states, two phases of the same phenomenon. Consciousness is liquid, flowing; mind is rocklike, like ice. Consciousness is like water. Consciousness is like water, mind is like ice - it is the same thing. The same water becomes ice, and the ice can bemelted again -through love, through warmth, itcan bemelted again and will become water.
And the third stage is when water evaporates and becomes invisible and disappears - that is Nirvana, cessation. Youcannotevenseeitnow. Waterisliquid, butyoucansee;whenitevaporates, it simply disappears - it goes into the unmanifested. These are three states of water, and these are three states of mind too. Mind means ice, consciousness means liquid water, Nirvana means evaporation.
WHEN THE DELUDED ARE DISTURBED BY INTERPRETATIVE THOUGHTS,
THAT WHICH IS AS YET UNPATTERNED TURNS VERY HARD AND SOLID.
The lake is unpatterned. You can pour water into any vessel: it will take the shape of the vessel. But you cannot pour ice into any vessel: it will resist, it will fight.
Two types of people come to me: one who comes like water; his surrender is simple, very innocent, childlike; he does not resist. Work starts immediately. No need to waste time. Then somebody comes with great resistance, with fear; he is protecting himself, armoring himself. Then he is like ice. It is very difficult to give him liquidity. He fights all efforts to make him liquid. He is afraid he may lose his identity. He will lose solidity - that's true - but not identity. Yes, he will lose the identity that solidity has, but that solidity is bringing misery and nothing else.
When you are solid, you are like a dead rock. Nothing can flower in you, and you cannot flow. When you are flowing, you have juice. When you are flowing, you have energy. When you are flowing, you have dynamism. When you are flowing, you are creative. When you are flowing, you are part of God. When you have become frozen, you are no more part of this great flow, you are no more part of this great ocean, you have become a small island, frozen, dead.
WHEN THE DELUDED ARE DISTURBED BY INTERPRETATIVE THOUGHTS,
THAT WHICH IS AS YET UNPATTERNED TURNS VERY HARD AND SOLID.
Be mindful. Be more and more in the state of unpatternedness, unstructuredness. Be without character - that's what Tantra says. It is very hard, even to understand, because down the centuries we have been taught to have characters. Character means to have a rigid structure; character means the past; character means a certain enforced discipline. Character means you are no more free - you only follow certain rules, you never go beyond those rules. You have a solidity. A man of character is a solid man.
Tantra says: Drop character, be fluid, more flowing, live moment-to-moment. It does not mean irresponsibility it means greater responsibility because it means greater awareness. When you can live through a character, you need not be aware - character takes care. When you live through a character, you can fall asleep easily; there is no need to be awake; the character will continue in a mechanical form. But when you don't have any character, when you don't have any hard structure around you, you have to be alert each moment. Each moment you have to see what you are doing. Each momentyouhave to respond to the newsituation.
A man of character is a dead man. He has a past but no future. A man who has no character... and I am not using the word in the same sense as when you use it about somebody, that he is characterless. When you use that word'characterless' you are not using it rightly, because whomsoever you call characterless has a CHARACTER. Maybe it is against the society, but he has a character; you can depend on him too.
The saint has a character, so does the sinner - they both have characters. You call the sinner characterless because you want to condemn his character; otherwise, he has a character. You can depend on him: give him the opportunity and he will steal - he has a character. Give him the opportunity and he is bound to steal. Give him the opportunity and he will do something wrong -he has a character. The moment he comes out of the jail he starts thinking, ”What to do now?” Again he is thrown in the jail, again he comes out... no jail has ever cured anybody. In fact, jailing a person, imprisoning aperson, makes him even moreclever, that's all. Maybe youwon'tbeable to catch him so easilynexttime, butnothing else; you just give him more cleverness. Buthe has a character.
Can't you see? - a drunkard has a character, and a very, very stubborn character. A thousand and one times he thinks not to drink any more, and again the character wins over and he is defeated.
The sinner has a character, so has the saint.
WhatTantrameansbycharacterlessnessisfreedom from character-thecharacterofthe saintand the character of the sinner, both make you solid like rocks, ice. You don't have any freedom, you can'tmoveeasily. Ifanewsituation arisesyoucannotrespond in anewway-youhaveacharacter, how can you respond in a new way? You have to respond in the old way. The old, the known, the well practised - you are skilled in it.
A character becomes an alibi: you need not live.
Tantra says: Be characterless, be without character. Characterlessness is freedom.
Saraha was saying to the king: Sir, I am characterless. You want to put me back into my old solidity ofbeing ascholar, apunditin the court? Youwantto putme backinto mypast? Ihave dropped out ofit. I am acharacterless person. Look atme! NowI don't followany rules -I followmy awareness. Look at me... I don't have any discipline - I have only my consciousness. My only shelter is my consciousness. I live out of it. I don't have any conscience - my consciousness is my only shelter.
Conscience is character and conscience is a trick of the society. The society creates a conscience in you so that you need not have any consciousness. It makes you follow certain rules such a long time; it rewards you if you follow, it punishes you if you don't follow. It makes you a robot. Once it has made the mechanism ofconscience in you, itcan be free ofyou -then you can be trusted: you will be a slave your whole life. It has put a conscience in you just as if Delgado had put an electrode in you; it is a subtle electrode. But it has killed you. You are no more a flow, no more a dynamism.
Saraha says to the king: I am unstructured, sir. I have dropped out of all patterns. I don't have any identity any more. I live in the moment.
MIND IMMACULATE IN ITS VERY BEING CAN NEVER BE
POLLUTED BY SAMSARA'S OR NIRVANA'S IMPURITIES.
A PRECIOUS JEWEL DEEP IN MUD
WILL NOT SHINE, THOUGH IT HASLUSTER.
SAYS SARAHA: MIND IMMACULATE... when the mind has no thoughts -thatis when the mind is pure consciousness, when the mind is a silent lake without any ripples, no interpretative thoughts, no analytical thoughts, when the mind is not philosophizing but just is
Tantra says: Walking, walk; sitting, sit; being, be! Exist without thinking. Let life flow through you without any blocks of thoughts. Let life flow through you without any fear. There is nothing to fear - you have nothing to lose. There is nothing to fear because death will take only that which birth has given to you. AND it is going to take it anyway, so there is nothing to fear.
Let life flow through you.
MIND IMMACULATE IN ITS VERY BEING CAN NEVER BE
POLLUTED BY SAMSARA'S OR NIRVANA'S IMPURITIES.
And Saraha says: You think I have become impure so you have come to help me and bring me to the world of the pure people? I am now in an immaculate state of mind. I am no more solid ice. Nothing can pollute me any more, because no thoughtcan create aripple in me -Ihave no desire.
That's why - a tremendous saying - he says:
... POLLUTED BY SAMSARA'S OR NIRVANA'S IMPURITIES.
No, it is not possible. Not even Nirvana can pollute me! What to say about Samsara? This arrowsmith woman cannot pollute me, neither can this cremation ground pollute me, nor can my mad activities pollute me - nothing can pollute me! I am beyond pollution. I am no more in a state where pollution is possible. Even Nirvana cannot pollute me!
What does he mean when he says'even Nirvana, even Nirvana's impurities'? Saraha is saying: I don't desire the world, I don't desire even Nirvana.
To desire is to be impure. Desire IS impure - WHAT you desire is irrelevant. You can desire money; it is impure. You can desire power; it is impure. You can desire God; it is impure. You can desire Nirvana; it is impure. Desire is impure - the object does not matter. What you desire is meaningless... desire!
The moment desire comes, thoughts come. Once the climate of cold winter is there, the desire, then winds start blowing. If you start thinking how to attain to Nirvana, how to become Enlightened, you will be inviting thoughts, your lake will be stirred. Again you will start becoming frozen in pieces; you willbecomesolid,rocklike,dead.Youwilllosetheflow-andflowislife,andflowisGod,andflowis Nirvana.
SoSarahasays:Nothingcanpolluteme-don'tbeworriedaboutme.Ihavecometoapoint,Ihave attained to a point, where impurity is not possible.
A PRECIOUS JEWEL DEEP IN MUD
WILL NOT SHINE, THOUGH IT HAS LUSTER.
Youcanthrowmeintomud,intodirtymud,butnowdirtymudcannotmakemedirty. I have attained to that precious jewelness, I have become a precious jewel now - I have understood who I am! Now you can throw this jewel into any mud. any dirt; maybe it will not shine, but it cannot lose its preciousness - it will still have luster. It will still be the same precious jewel.
Amomentcomeswhenyoulookintoyourselfandyouseeyourtranscendentalconsciousness,then nothing can pollute you.
Truth is not an experience: truth is experiencing. Truth is not an object of awareness: truth is awareness. Truth is not outside: truth is your interiority. Says Soren Kierkegaard: Truth is subjectivity. If truth is like an object, you can get it and lose it; but if truth is you, how can you lose it? Once you have known, you have known; then there is no going back. If truth is some experience, it can become polluted - but truth is experiencing, it is your innermost consciousness. It is you, it is your being.
KNOWLEDGE SHINES NOT IN THE DARK, BUT WHEN THE DARKNESS
IS ILLUMINED, SUFFERING DISAPPEARS (AT ONCE).
SAYS SARAHA: KNOWLEDGE SHINES NOT IN THE DARK... the darkness of the mind, the darkness of a structured being, the darkness of ego, the darkness of thoughts - a thousand and one thoughts - the darkness that you go on creating around yourself like an octopus. Because of that darkness that you go on creating, your innermost jewel shines not; otherwise it is a lamp of light. Once you stop creating this ink around you, this black cloud around you, then there is illumination.
And SUFFERING DISAPPEARS AT ONCE! This is the Tantra message, a great liberating message. Other religions say you will have to wait. Christianity says, Islam says, Judaism says, you will have to wait for the Last Judgement Day when everything will be reckoned with - what good you have done, what bad you have done - and then you will be rewarded or punished accordingly. You have to wait for the future, for the Judgement Day.
Hindus, Jains and others say you have to balance your bad acts with good acts; bad karma has to be dropped and good karma has to be evolved. You will have to wait for that too. It will take time. Formillionsoflivesyouhavebeendoingmillionsofthings,goodandbad-tosortitout,tobalance it, it is going to be impossible.
The Christian and the Judaic and the Mohammedan Judgement Day is easier: at least you will not have to reckon with everything you have done. God will take care, He will judge - that is His business. But Jainism and Hinduism say you have to look into your bad karmas, drop the bad, replace it with good -that too, it seems, will take millions of lives.
Tantra is liberating. Tantra says: SUFFERING DISAPPEARS AT ONCE. The moment you look into yourself,thatsinglemomentofinnervisionandsufferingdisappears-becausesufferinghadnever really existed. It was a nightmare. It is not because you have done bad karmas, that's why you are suffering; Tantra says you are suffering because you are dreaming. You have not done anything, neither good nor bad.
This is tremendously beautiful! Tantra says: You have not done anything - God is the doer. The Whole is the doer - how can you do anything? If you have been a saint, it was His will; if you have been a sinner, it was His will you have not done anything. How can you do? You are not separate from Him - how can you do? You don't have any separate will - it is His will, it is universal will.
So Tantra says you have not done anything good or bad. This has to be looked into, that's all. You have to see your innermost consciousness - it is pure, eternally pure, unpolluted by Samsara or Nirvana. Once you have seen that vision of your pure consciousness, all suffering stops - immediately, at once! It does not take even a split second.
SHOOTS GROW FROM THE SEED
AND LEAVES FROM THE SHOOTS.
And then things start changing. Then the seed is broken. The closed seed, Tantra says, is ego; the broken seed is egolessness. You put the seed in the earth: it cannot grow unless it disappears, unless it breaks, dies. Ego is like an egg; hidden behind it is the possibility of growth.
The seed, once broken, becomes egolessness. Then shoots come - shoots are no-thoughts, no-desires, no-mind. Then leaves come - leaves are knowing, experiencing, illumination, Satori, Samadhi. Then flowers come - flowers are SATCHITANAND: being, consciousness, truth. And then the fruit - the fruit is Nirvana, utter disappearance into existence. Once the seed is broken, everything follows. Theonlythingtobedoneistoputtheseedintotheearth,toallowittodisappear.
The Master is the earth and the disciple is the seed.
The last sutra:
HE WHO THINKS OF THE MIND IN TERMS OF ONE
OR MANY, CASTS AWAY THE LIGHT AND ENTERS THE WORLD.
INTO A (RAGING) FIRE HE WALKS WITH OPEN EYES -
WHO COULD BE MORE DESERVINGOF COMPASSION?
HE WHO THINKS OF THE MIND IN TERMS OF ONE OR MANY...
THINKING IS ALWAYS DIVISIVE, IT DIVIDES. Thinking is like a prism, yes, mind is like a prism: a pure white ray enters into the prism and is divided into seven colors - a rainbow is born. The world isarainbow. Through the mind, through the prism ofthe mind, one single rayoflight, onesingleray oftruth enters, and becomesa rainbow, afalse thing -the world is afalse thing.
The mind divides. It cannot see the whole; it always thinks in terms of duality. Mind is dualistic. Or, mind is dialectical: it thinks in terms of thesis, antithesis. The moment you talk about love, hate is present. The moment you talk about compassion, anger is present. The moment you talk about greed, the opposite is present, charity is present. Talk about charity and greed is present - they go together, they come in one package; they are not separate. But the mind continuously creates that.
You say'beautiful' and you have said'ugly' too. How can you say'beautiful' if you don't know what ugliness is? You have divided. Say'divine' and you have divided - you have said'profane'. Say'God' and you have proposed a Devil too. How can you say'God' without a Devil there? They go together.
Mind divides, and reality is one, indivisibly one. Then what to do? Mind has to be put aside. Don't look through the prism. Push away the prism and let the white light, the oneness of existence penetrate your being.
HE WHO THINKS OF THE MIND IN TERMS OF ONE
OR MANY, CASTS AWAY THE LIGHTANDENTERSTHE WORLD.
If you think of one or many, dual or non-dual, if you think in concepts, you have entered the world - you have cast away the light. There are only two possibilities: either cast away the mind or cast away the light. It is your choice.
A man came once to Ramakrishna, and he was praising Ramakrishna very highly, and he was touching Ramakrishna'sfeetagain and again, and he wassaying, ”Youare simply great-youhave renounced the world. You are such a great man! How much you have renounced!”
Ramakrishnalistened, laughedand said, ”Wait! Youaregoing toofar-thetruth isjusttheopposite.”
The man said, ”What do you mean?”
Ramakrishna said, ”I have not renounced anything - you have renounced. You are a great man!”
The man said, ”Are you kidding? I have renounced? I am a WORLDLY man - I indulge in things, a thousand and one greeds are there. I am very ambitious, I am very money-oriented. How can I be called great? No, no - you must be joking.”
And Ramakrishna said, ”No. There were two possibilities before me, and two were the possibilities before you. You have chosen the world and renounced God: I have chosen God, renounced the world. Who is the real renouncer? You have renounced the greater, more valuable, and chosen the meaningless. And I have renounced the meaningless and chosen the valuable. If there is a great diamond and a stone, you have chosen the stone and renounced the diamond; I have chosen the diamond and renounced the stone - and you call me a great man? a great man of renunciation? Have you gone mad?! Iam indulging in God. Ihave chosen the Precious One.”
Yes, I too agree with Ramakrishna. Mahavir, Buddha, Jesus, Mohammed, Saraha - they have not renounced. They have indulged, they have truly indulged. They have REALLY enjoyed - they have celebrated existence. We who are running after ordinary stones, we are the great renouncers.
Thereareonlytwopossibilities: eitherrenouncethemind and choosethelight,orrenouncethelight and choose the mind -itIs upto you.
HE WHO THINKS OF THE MIND IN TERMS OF ONE
OR MANY, CASTS AWAY THE LIGHT AND ENTERS THE WORLD.
INTO A RAGING FIRE HE WALKS WITH OPEN EYES -
WHO COULD BE MORE DESERVING OF COMPASSION?
Saraha says: Sir, you have come to help me. You think you are compassionate towards me. Certainly, your whole kingdom will think that way - that the king has gone to the cremation ground: how much is his compassion for Saraha! You think you have come because of compassion? You make me laugh... in fact, it is I who am feeling compassion for you, not otherwise. It is I who am feeling sorry for you - you are a fool!
INTO A RAGING FIRE HE WALKS WITH OPEN EYES...
Your eyes appear to be open but they are not open. You are blind! You don't know what you are doing... Living in the world, do you think you are enjoying? You are just in a raging fire.
Exactly that happened when Buddha left his palace, and left the boundaries of his kingdom, and he told his driver, ”Now you go back - I am going into the jungle. I have renounced.”
The old driver said, ”Sir, I am old enough, I am more aged than your father - listen to my advice. You are doing something utterlyfoolish! Leaving thisbeautiful kingdom,thispalace,abeautiful wife, all the luxuries for which each human being hankers - where are you going and for what?”
Buddha looked back at that marble palace and he said, ”I see there only fire and nothing else, a ragingfire. Thewholeworld isburningwithfire-and Iam notrenouncingitbecausethereisnothing to renounce in it. I am trying just to escape from the fire. No, I don't see any palace! and I don't see any joy there.”
Saraha says to the king:
INTO A RAGING FIRE HE WALKS WITH OPEN EYES -
WHO COULD BE MORE DESERVING OF COMPASSION?
You think, sir, you have come because of compassion to help me? No, the situation is just the reverse: I feel compassion for you - you are living in a raging fire. Beware! Be alert! Be awake! and get out of it as soon as possible, because all that is beautiful, all that is truthful, all that is good, is known and experienced only through the no-mind.
Tantra is a process of creating no-mind in you. No mind is the door of Nirvana.
CHAPTER 10
Hingle de jibity dangely ji
30 April 1977 am in Buddha Hall
The first question - it is from Prabha:
Question 1
DEAR OSHO, HINGLE DE JE, BIPITYJANGDANG-DORUN NUN, DEJUN BUNG. HINGLE DE JIBBITYDANGELY JI.
THIS IS WONDERFUL, PRABHA! THIS IS BEAUTIFUL. This is just far out, baby. I am driving you sane. Just a step more... and the Enlightenment.
The second question:
Question 2
IS PRAYER USEFUL? IF SO, TEACH ME HOW TO PRAY. IMEAN, PRAYER TO RECEIVE GOD'S LOVE, TO FEEL HIS GRACE.
FIRST, PRAYER IS NOT USEFUL - not at all. Prayer has no use, no utility. It is not a commodity. You cannot use it; it is not a thing. It is not a MEANS to anything else - how can you use it?
I can understand the questioner's mind. The so-called religions have been teaching people that prayer is a means to God. It is not! Prayer is God. It is not a MEANS towards anything - to be prayerful is the end in itself. When you are prayerful, you are divine. Not that the prayer leads you towards the Divine: in prayerfulness you discover your divinity.
Prayer is not a means. It is the end unto itself.
But this fallacy has persisted down the centuries in man's mind. Love is also a means, so is prayer, so is meditation - all that is impossible to reduce to means has been reduced. And that's why the beauty is lost.
Love is useless, so is prayer, so is meditation.
When you ask: ”Is prayer useful?” you don't understand what the word'prayer' means. You are greedy. You want God, you want to grab God; now you are finding ways and means to grab. And God cannot be grabbed!
YOU cannot possess God. You cannot contain God. You cannot interpret God. You cannot experience God. Then what can be done about God? Only one thing: you can be God. Nothing else can be done about it - because you ARE God. Recognize it or not, realize it or not, but you are God. And only that can be done which is already there; only that can be done which has already happened. Nothing new can be added... only revelation, only discovery.
So, the first thing: prayer is not any utility. The moment you use prayer, you make it ugly. That is a sacrilege! to use prayer. And whosoever has said to you to use prayer has been not only irreligious but anti-religious. He does not understand what he is saying. He is talking nonsense.
Be prayerful, not because it has some utility, but because it is a joy. Be prayerful, not because through ityou willarriveanywhere, butTHROUGH IT YOU ARE! THROUGH IT YOU START BEING. Through it you are present: without it you are absent. It is not a goal somewhere in the future; it is a discovery of the presence that is already there, that is already the case.
And don't think in terms of things, otherwise prayer becomes part of economics, not part of religion. If it is a means, then it is part of economics. All means are part of economics. Ends are beyond economics. Religion is concerned with the end, not with the means. Religion is not concerned at all with reaching somewhere. Religion is concerned only with one thing: to knowwhere we are!
To celebrate this moment is prayer. To be herenow is prayer. To listen to these birds is prayer. To feel the presence of people around you is prayer. To touch a tree with love is prayer. To look at a child with deep respect, with reverence for life, is prayer.
So, first thing: don't ask ”Is prayer useful?”
And then the second thing you say: ”If so, teach me how to pray.”
If you start by'if', prayer cannot be taught. The VERY beginning with'if' is the beginning of doubt.'If' is not part of a prayerful mind. Prayer needs trust; there is no'if'. It is so. It is absolutely so.
When you can trust the unknown, the invisible, the unmanifest, then there is prayer. If you start by'if', then prayer will be at most a hypothesis. Then prayer will be a theory, and prayer is not a theory. Prayer is not a thing, not a theory - prayer is an experience. You cannot start by if.
The very beginning goes wrong. You have taken a step in the wrong direction. Drop ifs and you will be in prayer. Drop ALL ifs, don't live life through hypothetical things: ”If this is so, if there is God, then I will pray.” But how can you pray if God is just an if? If God is just'as if', then your prayer will alsobe just'as if'. Itwill be an emptygesture. Youwill bowdown, youwill utterafewwords, butyour heart will not be there. The heart is never with ifs.
Science works through ifs: religion does not work through ifs.
You are asking: ”If there is love, then teach me love.” IF there is love? Then nothing has stirred in your heart, then the spring has not come, and that breeze has not touched you which is called love. You must have heard somebody else talking about love. You must have read in some book; you must have been reading romantic poetry. The word'love' has come to you, but there has been not a single moment of love experience... so you ask: ”If there is love, then teach us.” But with if love cannot be taught.
Have you never experienced any moment of love, prayer, beatitude? I have never come across a singlehuman being whoissopoor. Haveyounoteverlistened tothesilenceofthenight? Haveyou not ever been thrilled by it? touched by it? transformed by it? Have you never seen a sun rising on the horizon? Have you never felt like a deep interrelationship with the rising sun? Have you not felt more life in you, pouring from everywhere? Maybe for a moment Have you never held the hand
of a human being and something started flowing from you to him and from him to you? Have you never experienced when two human spaces overlap and flow into each other? Have you never seen a roseflower and smeltthe fragrance ofit? -and suddenlyyouare transported into another world?
These are moments of prayer. Don't start by if. Gather all the moments of your life which were beautiful - they were all moments of prayer. Base your temple of prayer on those moments. Let that be the foundation, not if. The bricks of if are false. Build the foundation with certainties, with absolute certainties - only then, ONLY then is there a possibility of your ever entering into the world of prayer. It is a great world. It has a beginning, but it has no end. It is oceanic.
So please don't say ”if so”. IT IS SO! And if you have not yet felt it is so, then look into your life and find out some certainties about beauty, about love, about experiences which go beyond the mind. Collect all those.
The ordinary habit of the mind is not to collect them, because they go against the logical mind. So we never take note of them. They happen, they happen to everybody. Let me repeat: Nobody is so poor. They happen to the poorest man. Man is MADE in such a way, man IS in such a way - they are bound to happen. But we don'ttake note of them because they are dangerous moments. If they are real, then whatwill happen to our logical mind? Theyare very illogical moments.
Now, listening to a bird, and something starts singing within you - this is very illogical. You cannot find out how it is happening, why it is happening - why should it be so? The mind is at a loss. The only course left for the mind is not to take note of it, forget about it! It is just a whim - maybe some eccentric moment, maybe you have gone temporarily mad. The mind interprets these things like this... it was nothing, just a mood. You were emotional, you were being sentimental - that's all. There was no authentic experience in it.
This is the way to deny. Once you start denying, then you don't have any moments to base your prayer life upon. Hence the question: ”If so...”
My first suggestion is: go into your life; remember all those moments. You must have been a small child collecting sea shells on a beach, and the sun was showering on you, and the wind was salty and sharp, and you were in tremendous joy. No king has ever been so joyful. You were almost at the top of the world - you were an emperor. Remember... that is the right brick to base upon.
You were a small child running after a butterfly - that was the moment of prayer. For the first time you fell in love with a woman or a man, and your heart was churned and stirred, and you started dreaming in anewway... thatwas the momentofprayer,your firstlove,your firstfriendship.
Gatherfrom yourpastafewcertaintiesaboutsomething thatgoesbeyond themind,which the mind cannotinterpret,which the mind cannotdissect,which issimplytranscendental to the mind. Collect thosetranscendental moments,even afew,theywill do-butthen therewill benoif. Then you move with certainty. Then it is not a hypothesis. Then there is trust.
If it could happen to you when you were a child, why can't it happen to you now? Why? Gather those moments of wonder! when you were thrilled.
Just the other day I was reading about a man, a very simple man, a very old man. And the English philosopher, thinker, Doctor Johnson, was staying with the old man. And in the morning when they were taking their tea, the old man said, ”Dr. Johnson, you may be surprised to know that when young I also tried to become a philosopher.”
Dr. Johnson asked, ”Then what happened? Why could you not become a philosopher?”
Themanlaughedandhesaid,”Butcheerfulnessagainandagaineruptedintomylife-cheerfulness. Because of that cheerfulness, I could not become a philosopher. Again and again - I tried hard to repress it!”
I like that answer. Those moments of cheerfulness are moments of prayer. A philosopher cannot pray, a thinker cannot pray - because all thinking starts with if... all thinking starts with doubt. And prayer starts with trust.
That's why Jesus says: Only those who are like small children, only they will be able to enter into theKingdom ofmyGod -thosewhoseeyesare full ofwonder,forwhom each momentisamoment of surprise, those whose hearts are still open to be thrilled, only they.
So first drop if, and collect some certainties - that is the first lesson about prayer.
SECOND THING YOU SAY: ”... teach me how to pray.”There is no how, Prayer is not a technique. Meditation can be taught;itisatechnique,itis amethod. Prayeris notamethod -itisalove affair! You can pray, but prayer cannot be taught.
Ithappened once: Some ofJesus'disciplesasked him, ”Master, teach ustoprayand teach ushow.” And what did Jesus do? you know? He acted exactly the way a Zen Master is supposed to act: he simply fell on the ground, on his knees, and started praying! They were puzzled. They looked. They must have shrugged their shoulders that ”We have asked him to teach, and what is he doing? He is praying - but how can HIS praying help us?” Later on they must have asked, and Jesus said, ”But that is the only way - there is no technique!”
Jesus prayed - what else can you do? If they had been a little more alert, they would have sat silently by the side of Jesus, holding his hands or touching his robe... contact high. Something would have happened there.
I cannot teach you prayer, but I am prayer. And I need not fall on my knees to pray - I am prayer. You just imbibe my being, you drink me as much as you can, my presence. And it will teach you what prayer is. EVERY morning I am teaching you what prayer is! Every moment when you come to me I am teaching you what prayer is. I am in prayer! You just be a little open. You just open your doors... Let my breeze pass through you. It is an infection - prayer is an infection.
I cannot teach you how to pray, but I can make you prayerful. Get more in tune with my presence.
And don't keep these questions inside your mind because they will be the barriers. Just be vulnerable and it will happen. One day suddenly you will see the heart is singing, and something is dancing within you... somenewenergy,asifinadarknightasuddenrayoflighthasenteredyour being.
This is prayer! You cannot do it - you can only allow it to happen. Meditation can be done - prayer cannot be done. Meditation is more scientific that way; it can be taught. But prayer? Prayer is absolutely unscientific; it is a matter of the heart.
Feel me and you will feel prayer. Touch me... and you will touch prayer. Listen to me and you are listening to words which are full of prayer.
And then, sometime sitting silently, let there be a dialogue - a dialogue with existence. You can call the existence God or Father or Mother - anything is okay. But don't repeat any ritual. Don't repeat the Christian prayer, and don't repeat the Hindu prayer, don't repeat the Gayatri Mantra, and don't repeat NAMOKAR - don't repeatany mantra, Indian, Tibetan, Chinese. Don'trepeat! CREATE your own mantra: don't be a parrot. Can't you say something to God on your own? And don't rehearse it, don't prepare for it. Can't you face God directly as a small child faces his father or mother? Can't you say something to Him? Can't you say ”hello”?
Let prayer happen! Don't prepare for it. A prepared prayer is a false prayer. And a repeated prayer is just a mechanical thing. You can repeat the Christian prayer - you have crammed it, it has been forced upon you. You can repeat it in the night and fall asleep, but it will not make you aware - because it has not been done as a response!
I have heard about a great mathematician who used to pray every night with a single word: he would look at the sky and would say ”Ditto.” What is the point of repeating every day the same as yesterday? What are you doing when you repeat the same prayer again and again'? - 'ditto' is better! Why bother God every day with the same repetition? Say something if you have something to say; if you don't have something to say, just say, ”I don't have anything to say today.”
Or just be silent - what is the need of saying anything? But be true - at least between you and the Whole, let there be truth. That's what prayer is. Open your heart.
I have heard: Moses was passing through a forest, and he came across a man, a shepherd, a poor man, a dirty, poor man, with rags for clothes. And he was praying; it was prayertime and he was praying. Moses, just out of curiosity, stood behind him and listened. And he could not believe what sort of prayer this was, because he was saying, ”God, when I die, allow me into your paradise - I will take care of you. If you have lice, I will remove them.” HE had lice, so certainly he says, ”If you have lice I will remove them. I will give you such a good bath, and I will cook food for you - and I cook really good things. And I will take care of your sheep. And I will prepare milk for you... and this and that. And I can do good massage too!”
Then it was too much. When he came to lice, then it was too much - Moses just shook him and said, ”What nonsense are you talking about! You will remove lice, so God has lice?”
The poor man was disturbed. He said, ”I don't know exactly because I have never seen Him. But all that I know is what I know about myself: I have lice.”
Moses said, ”Stop! Never pray in this way! This is sacrilege - you will fall into hell!”
The man started trembling and perspiring. He said, ”But I have been doing this my whole life - whatsoevercomestomymind,Isay.AndIdon'tknow-youteachmetherightway.”
And Moses teaches him the right way to pray, and the poor shepherd goes with his sheep. And then suddenly God thunders all over the forest, and God is very angry. He says to Moses, ”You are mad! I have sent you into the world to bring people to me, and you are throwing my people away from me -alover.Hewasalover;hewasoneofthebestprayers,andyouhavebrokenhisheart,youhave broken his trust. You GO and apologize, and take your prayer back!”
And Moses goes and falls at the feet of the shepherd and says, ”Excuse me, forgive me! I was wrong, you are right. God approves of you; my prayer has to be taken back.”
Exactly that's how it should be. Let your prayer grow. Let it happen. Yes, whenever you are feeling like having a chitchat with God, wait for those moments. And there is no need to repeat it every day - there is no need. When the feeling comes! Let it be out of your feeling; don't make a ritual out of it.
Sometimes taking abath, sitting undertheshower, and yousuddenlyfeel theurgetopray-letitbe there. It is perfectly good; your bathroom is perfectly good - there is no need to go to any church. In that moment when the urge is there, your bathroom is the church. Let the prayer be there. Have a littlechitchat!andyouwillbesurprisedhowbeautifulitis. Whenitcomesoutoftheheartitisheard, it is responded to.
Sometimesmakinglovetoyourwoman, suddenlyanurgearisestopray-prayTHATverymoment! You cannot find a better moment than that; you are closest to God, you are closest to life energy. When the orgasm is showering on you... pray! But wait - don't make it a ritual. That is the whole Tantra attitude: let things be spontaneous.
And the last thing you say: ”I mean prayer to receive God's love, to feel His grace.”
Again your question is wrong: ”I mean prayer to receive God's love.” You are greedy! Prayer is to love God. Yes, love comes from God a thousandfold, but that is not the desire: that is the outcome of it; not the result, but the consequence. Yes, love will come like a flood. You take one step towards God and God takes a thousand steps towards you. You give Him one drop, offer Him one drop of your love, and His whole ocean becomes available to you. Yes, that happens! but that should not be the desire. The desire is wrong. If you simply want God's love, and that's why you are praying, then your prayer is a bargain, then it is business. And beware of business!
In a small school somewhere in the United States, the teacher asks the boys: ”Who was the greatest man in human history?” Of course, an American says, ”Abraham Lincoln,” and an Indian says, ”Mahatma Gandhi,”and an English boy says, ”Winston Churchill,”and so on and so forth. And then a small Jewish boy stands up and says, ”Jesus,” and he wins, he wins a reward. But the teacher asks him, ”You are a Jew, why did you say Jesus'?”
He said, ”I know all the time in my heart it is Moses - but business is business.”
Don't make prayer a business. Let it be a pure offering: just give it out of your heart. Don't ask for anything in return. Then much comes... thousandfold, millionfold, God flows towards you. But, again, remember: it is a consequence not a result.
The third question:
Question 3
YOU MENTIONED JUNG'S IDEA THAT MEN NEED TWO TYPES OF WOMEN. HISTORICALLY, A LOT OF MEN SEEM TO FEEL THIS WAY, WHILE VERY FEW WOMEN SEEM TO NEED MORE THAN ONE MAN AT A TIME. CAN THERE BE SOMETHING TO THIS IDEA IN MALE PSYCHOLOGY? IF SO, WHY?
THE QUESTION IS FROM ANAND PREM. First thing: she says, ”Historically, a lot of men seem to feel this way...”History is justbunk. And history is created by men;no woman has written history. It is male-oriented, it is male-dominated, it is male-managed. It is a false history.
Man has tried to condition woman in such a way that he can exploit her easily, and she cannot even rebel. Slaves always have to be hypnotized in such a way that they cannot rebel. Man has conditioned the woman's mind in such a way that she thinks the way man wants her to think.
You say: ”Historically, a lot of men seem to feel this way...” because men are more free, they are the masters. Women have lived like slaves; they have accepted the slavery. You have to throw that slavery completely, you have to come out of it.
Just the other night I was reading that in the sixth century there was a great Christian conference of all the great Christian leaders to decide whether women have souls or not. Fortunately, they decided thatwomen do have souls -but only by ONE vote. It is notmuch of a victory. By the majority of one vote! - just one vote less and historically you would not have any soul. It is not much, this soul.
Man has crushed the whole psychology of women. And whatsoever you see is not really the psychology of women - it is man-made psychology, man-created psychology in women. The more free you will be, the more you will also feel the same way - because men and women are not REALLY so different as they have been thought to be. They ARE different! Their biology is different, and, certainly, their psychology is different - but they are not unequals. Their similarities are more than their dissimilarities.
Just think: a man eating the same thing every day gets fed up, and a woman? will she get fed up with it or not? She will also get fed up. What is the difference between the two? Boredom is as natural to man as to woman. And unless a sexual relationship evolves into a spiritual friendship, it is going to be boring.
Let it be very clear to you: a sexual relationship in itself cannot be a lasting affair, because as far as sex is concerned it is a momentary thing. Once you have made love to a woman, you are really finished with her, you are no more interested in her. Unless something more than a sexual relationship arises between you, something higher, some spiritual contact is made - it can be made through sex, it SHOULD be made, otherwise sexual relationship is just physical - if something spiritual, something like a spiritual marriagehappens,THENtherewill benoproblem. Then you can stay together. And then, whether you are a man or a woman you will not think of other women or other men. It is finished - you have found your soulmate.
But if the relationship is only physical, then the body gets tired, bored. The body needs a thrill, the body needs the new, the body needs sensation. The body is always hankering for something new.
An ATSdriver,afteralong journey across Salisbury Plain, arrived at her destination, a remote camp, at midnight. The Sergeant of the Guard showed her where to leave the lorry, and then said, ”Where will you sleep tonight?”
The girl explained that the only thing she could do was to kip down in the cab. It was a cold night, and the Sergeant thought for a moment and said, ”If you like you can have my bunk - I'll sleep on the floor.”
The offer was accepted with thanks. After the girl had turned in, she felt very sorry for the Sergeant Lying down there on the hard cold floor, and, leaning out, said, ”This isn't right - why don't you get up here and squeeze in alongside of me?”
This being done, the'sarge' said, ”Well, how's it to be? Do you want to sleep single or married?”
The girl giggled and said, ”I think it would be nice if we slept married, don't you?”
”Right,I'm not fussy, we'll sleepmarried then,”hesaid turning hisbackon herand going offtosleep.
Marriage bores. That's why you see so many bored faces all around the world. Marriage is a tremendous boredom. Unless something spiritual happens in it... which is rare. So men start looking outside. Women will ALSO look outside, but they have not been free. That's why you find so manywomen prostitutes,butnotso manymaleprostitutes. Yes,theyexistin London Ithink,afew... but male prostitutes are just almost non-existent. Why?
Prostitution is a by-product of marriage, and unless marriage disappears, prostitution is going to remain - it is a by-product. It will go only with marriage. Now, your so-called mahatmas have been trying to stop prostitution and these are the people who go on forcing marriage. And they don't see the absurdity of it! Prostitution exists BECAUSE of marriage. In animals there is no prostitution because there is no marriage. Have you ever found any animal prostituting itself? There is no problem! Why should prostitution exist at all?
That ugly thing exists because of one other ugly thing: marriage. But male prostitutes are not so many because women have not been free. They have been repressed completely. They have not beenallowed tohavetheirsexualjoyeven. They are not even supposedtohaveit-onlybad women are supposed to have sexual joy, notgood women;notladies, onlywomen. Ladiesarenotsupposed to have any joy - they are far superior.
This is not real history. This is managed history this is arranged history. And if you go on for thousands of years enforcing some idea, it becomes almost real. It is not true psychology. To know the true psychology, you will have to give women total freedom - and then see. And you will be surprised: they will be far ahead of men.
You can watch them: a man almost always goes on wearing the same grey dress - women? every day they need a new sari. I watch their mind. If they are given total freedom, they will be far ahead ofmen! Men cangoon;you cansee-theirclothesarenotverycolorful. And something like fashion does not exist as far as man is concerned. What fashion? The same grey official suit, the same tie. They don't have much of a wardrobe - but women? The whole market exists for them! They are the real consumers.
Man is the producer: woman is the consumer. Ninety percent of the things in the market exist for women. Why? They want new things more; they want new experiences, new thrills more. Maybe because their sexuality has been repressed it is a diversion of their energy - because they cannot haveanewhusband, anewsariisasubstitute;anewcarisasubstitute, anewhouseisasubstitute. They put their energy somewhere else But this is not reality.
Women have been so much corrupted and destroyed that it is very difficult to decide what their real psychology is. Don't listen to history; history is an ugly record - it is a record of long slavery. At least women should NOT listen to history; they should burn all history books! They should say that history has to be written again.
You will be surprised thatwhen you imposeacertain idea, themind startsfunctioning thatway. Mind starts imitating ideas. It has been a long hypnosis the woman has lived in.
ButIamnotsayingthatsocietyshouldbejustlikeanimals. Iamsayingthatsexshouldbeajumping- board. If your relationship is defined by sex only and it has nothing more in it, then marriage will create prostitution. But if your marriage is deeper than your body, then there is no need.
Each single human being, man or woman, is such an infinite space... you can go on exploring, go on exploring. There is no end to it. Each human being, man or woman, EACH day is so alive and so new - new leaves coming up, new flowers blooming, a new climate, new moods - if you love, if you are really intimate, you will never find the same old woman with you, and you will never find the same old man. Life is such a tremendous dynamism
But you don't love! You are stuck with the body. You don't look in. You don't look at the inner sky which is constantly changing... what MORE change do you need? But you don't look at that. Of course,the body is the same. Then itloses excitement. When excitementis lost,yourlife becomes boring. When you become bored you start seeking help, because you are getting neurotic. Your life is a drag. You go to the psychoanalyst; in the past you used to go to the priest, now you go to the psychoanalyst-you askforhelp. Something isgoing wrong: you don'tenjoylife,thereisnodelight. You start thinking of committing suicide. If you move with excitement, then you become criminals. If you stay with society, with the establishment, then you become bored. It is a great dilemma: you are not allowed to move anywhere! Between these two horns you are crushed and killed. Either live with the establishment, then you will live a bored life; or go anti-establishment, but then you look like a criminal, then you start feeling guilty.
Women haveto come to absolute freedom. And with the freedom ofwomen,man will also be free - becauseyoucannotbereallyfreeifyouarekeepingsomebodyasaslave. Amasterisaslaveofthe slave. Man is not really free, because he cannot be: HALF of humanity is forced to remain slaves - how can man be free? His freedom is just so-so, just superficial. With the freedom of women, man will also be free.
And with freedom there is a possibility to enter into a deeper relationship - and if that DOESN'T happen then there is no need to remain bored, then there is no need to remain clinging to each other.
A man who had felt unwell for some time went to his doctor and asked for a check-up. The doctor gave him a going over and said, ”Either you pack up smoking, drinking and sex, or you'll be dead in twelve months.”
After a while the man went back and said, ”Look, I'm so bloody miserable I might just as well be dead - PLEASE can I smoke just a little?”
”Very well, just five filter-tips a day,” said the medico, who was a very abrupt man.
Some weeks later the man was back again: ”Look here, I do miss my pint, please ?'
”Alright, two halves a day then, and no spirits.”
Time wentby,and the patientapproached the doctorforthe third time... seeing the man,the doctor said, ”Yes, yes, but only with your wife - no excitement!”
Life needs excitement. If you cannot allow it to have spiritual excitement, it will need physical excitement. Give it a higher excitement and the lower excitements disappear; they are not needed. Don't give it a higher excitement and the lower is the only available excitement.
Man has tried to keep himself open. Jung is tricky, and what Jung is saying is the old crap. This has always been said by man, that a man needs two women at least: one, the mother type, the wife type; another, the mistress, the inspiration. If man needs two women, then women also need two men: the father type and the Don Juan.
But what I am trying to say is that even in the twentieth century men like Freud and Jung are still as male chauvinistic as ever - not much difference. Women have to think for themselves; men cannot be of much help. They have to come to their own understanding - and NOW there is an opportunity for them to come to their own understanding.
BUT ANAND PREM'S QUESTION is not basically about women: it is about her own mind. She is a clinging type, and that clinging is also because of the historical conditioning. The woman clings too much because she is afraid about insecurity, about safety, about finance, about this and that. She is so much afraid. She has been made afraid! Thatis the trick of the man,to make the woman afraid. When thewoman isafraid shecan beeasilydominated. You cannotdominatesomebodywhoisnot afraid. So create fear!
Firstmancreatesfearinwomenabouttheirvirginity-hecreatesgreatfearthatvirginityissomething very valuable. Down the centuries he has created that fear, so every girl is afraid: if she loses her virginity, all is lost. Through that fear she cannot relate to people, she cannot make friendships, she cannot move in freedom. She cannot have a few experiences before she decides whom to choose. The fear... she has to be virgin.
Look at the distinction: they have not told the boys that ”you have to be virgin” - they say ”boys are boys.” And girls are not girls? Girls are girls too! Why are boys boys? Virginity is not asked from the boys. They are given freedom.
Through virginity, a great conditioning. And once a woman becomes too much afraid of losing her virginity - think: up to the twentieth year of age, twenty years she has been protecting her virginity, twenty years of conditioning - she will become frigid. Then she will never enjoy! Then she will never be able to flow in love; she will never have any orgasm. Down the centuries, millions of women have not had any orgasm they don't know what orgasm is. They simply suffer. They are simply means for the man. This a great degradation.
But if virginity is too important, and there is twenty years of conditioning that one has to be a virgin and always on guard, then it will be very difficult to drop that habit. How can you suddenly drop it after twenty years of conditioning? Just one day the honeymoon comes and you have to drop it - how can you drop it? You can only pretend - but deep down you think your husband a criminal, a beast,an uglyman,because heisdoing something which you knowisasin. You neverallowed any other man - love is sin, and this man is doing that!
No wife is ever capable of forgiving the husband. In fact, in India particularly, no woman respects the husband, cannot. Shows all respect, but CANNOT respect - deep down she hates the man because this is the man who is dragging her into sin. How can you respect the husband when he is the sinner? Without him you were a virgin; with him you have fallen. That's why the society teaches too much: Respect the husband! because the society knows, naturally the woman will not be able to respect him, so respect has to be forced... Respect the husband! Because if things go naturally, then she will HATE this man. This is the man who is preparing hell for her.
And out of this sin are born children - how can you love your children? Born out of sin, you will hate them too, deep down in the unconscious. The very presence of the children will remind you again and again of the sin that you have committed!
The whole society has suffered because of this foolishness. Love is virtue, not sin. And to be capable of more love, is to be more virtuous. To be capable of enjoying love is a basic quality of a religious man - these are my definitions.
Anand Prem is a great clinger - and she thinks that whatsoever is true about her is true about all women? In a way she is right, because all other women have been conditioned in the same way. But it is not truth - neither about other women nor about you, Anand Prem, it is not truth.
Become capable of being individuals, then you will have some taste of freedom. A woman is never thought of as an individual. When she is small, she is a daughter. When she is young, she is a wife. Whenshebecomesalittleolder,sheisamother;stillolder,sheisagrandmother-butsheisnever herself. Sometimes a daughter, sometimes a wife, sometimes a mother, sometimes a grandmother
- but NEVER herself. Always in relation to somebody else!
Individuality is needed as a basic requirement. A woman is a woman! her being a daughter is secondary; her being a wife is secondary; her being a mother is secondary. A woman is a woman
- her womanhood is primary. And when women start becoming individuals, there will be a totally different world - more beautiful, more joyous.
Now there is boredom and jealousy, nothing else. You are bored with the woman, the woman is bored with you. You are jealous, she is jealous. Why does this jealousy come as a shadow of boredom? Boredom brings it. Too many people come to me and they want not to be jealous, but they don't understand why jealousy comes, they don't understand the mechanism of it.
Listen:whenyouareboredwithawoman,youknowdeepdownthatshemustbeboredwithyoutoo. That's natural! If she is bored with you, then she must be looking for some other man somewhere
- the milkman, the postman, the driver - whosoever is available, she must be looking somewhere. You know when you are bored, you start looking at other women. So you know! this is a natural inference. Jealousy arises. So you become jealous - she must be looking. Then you start finding ways to see whether she is looking or not. And, naturally, how can she avoid looking? There are so many men - and she is bored with you. It is her life; her whole life is at stake.
Thewomanisjealous;sheknowsthatthehusbandisbored. Nowheisnotsodelightedasheused to be; now he does not come running home with joy; now he simply tolerates her. In fact, he is more interested in his newspaper than he is interested in her. He immediately gets irritated; small things and he becomes very, very angry and rough. All that softness, that honeymoon softness is gone. She knows he is bored. He is no more interested in her.
Thensuddenly,certainlysheknows,herinstinctknows,hemustbebecominginterestedsomewhere else - jealousy. Then if some day he comes home happy, she is worried: he must have been with some woman, otherwise why is he looking so happy? If he goes for a holiday, or if he goes for some business trip, she is worried. If he starts going too much on business trips, it becomes more certain... jealousy poisons the relationship.
But it is part of boredom! If you are not bored with the person, you will not be jealous because you will not have that idea in your mind. It is not, in fact, because of the OTHER'S interest in the other: it is because of YOUR interest in the other that you become jealous, that jealousy arises.
Of course, women are more jealous because they are less free. Their boredom is more fixed. They know the man goes out; he has more possibilities, opportunities. They are encaged in the home, imprisoned in the home with the kids; it is difficult for them to have so much freedom. They feel jealous. The more they feel jealous, the more they cling. Fear arises. If the man leaves them, what will happen? A slave becomes MORE attached to his safety than to his freedom. A slave becomes MORE attached to his security than to his freedom. That's what has happened. It has nothing to do with feminine psychology, Prem. Yes, I understand: it has happened to woman; it is an ugly phenomenon. It has to be dropped. It should not be so in the future if men and women become a little more aware. And BOTH are living in hell!
The Squire and his Lady were Chief Patrons of the Agricultural Show, and after the opening ceremony they dutifully walked round, mixing with the tenants and peasantry, and looking at the exhibits.
But his Lordship spent so much time in the beer tent that her Ladyship wandered off to admire the prize bull. Never was a male animal so splendidly equipped.
”My, but that's a fine beast you have there, Giles,” she said to the yokel in charge.
”Yes, my Lady, he be champion, and father o'champions.”
”Go on, tell me about him.”
”Well, M'am, this here bull went to stud three hundred times last year.”
”Indeed? Well, go over to his Lordship will you, my good fellow, and tell him there's a bull here went to stud three hundred times in one year, will you.”
Giles dutifully trotted up to Squire and gave the message
”Very interesting indeed,” was his comment, ”always the same cow, I presume?”
”Oh, no indeed, Sir, three hundred different cows.”
”Aha, go and tell her Ladyship that, will you.”
Animals are so happy... because they don't have any institution to live in. And, mind you, I am not against marriage: I am for a higher marriage. I am against THIS marriage because this marriage has created prostitution. I am for a higher marriage.
If you can find the intimacy, spiritual intimacy with a man or woman, then there will be a NATURAL togetherness no law is needed to enforce it. Then there will be a spontaneous joy in being together. Till it lasts, good; when it disappears, there is no point in being together - no point at all! Then you are crushing each other, killing each other; then you are either a masochist or a sadist - you are neurotic.
IfMYideasomedayprevails-whichseemsverydifficult,becausemanhasbecomesoaccustomed to dead roles that he has forgotten how to live - if some day LIFE prevails and man becomes courageous enough to live dangerously, then there will be real marriages, then you will find many soulmates together. There will be no prostitution.
Of course, the larger part of humanity will go on changing partners, but nothing is wrong in it. The onlyproblem thatarisesagain and again in the mindsofmen and women is: What about kids? That is not a big problem. My conception is that of commune, not of a family. Families have to disappear
- communes should exist.
For example, this is a commune. Kids should belong to the commune, and the commune should take care of the kids. The mother should be known, who the mother is, but the father should not be known-thereisnoneed. Thatwastheoriginalstateofhumanity: matriarchal. Thensocietybecame patriarchal: father became important. And with the father came a thousand and one illnesses. The greatest illness has been private property; it came with father. And the society will suffer from private property until father disappears.
A commune - where kids belong to the commune, when the commune can take care of them. The mother will look after them, but the mother can trust one thing: that she can move from one man to another - there is no problem in it. The kids should be taken care of; even if she dies, the commune is there.
And, when the property belongs to the commune and not to any individual, there will be real communism. Even in Soviet Russia, real communism does not exist. It cannot exist with the father; it is impossible. Private property came with the family, with the nuclear family - father, mother, kids
- then private property came. Private property can go only when this nuclear family disappears and a totally new concept of commune arrives. It is possible now. The world has come to that state of consciousness where communes can exist, and THROUGH communes, communism -not otherwise. Not that communism comes first - it is not possible. If communism comes first, it will bring only dictatorship, it will bring only an ugly society as it has happened in Soviet Russia or is happening in China.
First,.let there be communal lifeasfarassexisconcerned, then propertywill disappear. Propertyis part of sexual possession. When you possess a woman, you possess property; when you possess a man, you possess property - you have to possess property. When you don't possess any human being, who bothers to possess property? Then property is to be used; there is no need to possess. And itiseasiertouse itwithoutpossessing it, becausepeoplewhopossesscannotuse it-theyare always afraid, they are miserly. Property can be used more freely.
But first the family has to disappear.
Iamnotsayingthatallfamilieswilldisappear. Onlyspiritualfamilieswillremain;non-spiritualfamilies will disappear. But it is good, because those people who are not spiritual enough, why should they be forced to remain bored? Why should they be forced to remain in a relationship which does not lead to any joy? Why? This is criminal.
The fourth question:
Question 4
I USED TO THINK THAT I AM PRETTY AWARE, PRETTY SURRENDERED. THAT IMAGE STILL CROSSES MY MIND, BUTI DON'T REALLY BELIEVE IN IT. AND ALL THIS MAKES ME WONDER THAT MAYBE ALL YOUR TALK OF AWARENESS AND SURRENDER IS JUST TO DRIVE US CRAZY LIKE A CARROT IN FRONT OF A DONKEY, AND THAT NONE OF IT REALLY EXISTS - AND THAT MAKES ME FEEL ANGRY, STUPID AND INDIFFERENT ALL AT ONCE.
THE CARROT EXISTS... AND THE DONKEY DOES NOT. Now it is up to you to choose: you can be adonkey,then the carrot does not exist. Ifyou lookatthecarrot,the carrot exists and thedonkey disappears. Naturally, if you thinkthecarrotdoesnotexist,you will feel angry, stupid and indifferent, because you will be the donkey. Rather than thinking that the carrot does not exist, why don't you look inside yourself - do you exist?
My whole emphasis is: Enlightenment exists - you don't exist! Awareness exists - ego does not exist: that is my whole emphasis.
But still, the choice is yours; it is up to you. If you want to choose misery, then misery is possible onlywith theego -then you havetochoosetheego,then you havetochoose thedonkey. Then you have to go on believing that the carrot does not exist. BUT IT EXISTS! And once you start feeling the carrot, you will start seeing that the donkey is disappearing: it was just an idea. With the carrot there is bliss. With the ego there is only hell. Choose whatsoever you want to choose
The fifth question:
Question 5
BEFORE I MET YOU, I WAS MISERABLE AND TOTALLY UNAWARE. NOW, I AM MISERABLE WITH SOME DEGREE OF AWARENESS. WHAT'S NEW?
CAN'T YOU SEE IT?'THAT SOME DEGREE OF AWARENESS'-do you think it is valueless? That is the first ray... and the sun is not far away. If you catch hold of the ray, if you move in the direction the ray is coming from, you will reach to the very source oflight.
If even ONE ray exists in darkness, it is enough proof of light, of God. Don't call it'some degree of awareness'.
But I understand. We have lived unaware so long, we have lived unconsciously so long, we have lived like machines so long, that even when a little awareness comes, our old habits are so heavy, so big
There was once a young woman joined the ATS and went for her medical. The doctor had her stripped off, and then called over his assistant. ”Look at that: the biggest navel I've ever seen in all my career!”
The young doctor looked and said, ”By George, girl, that's a huge navel can I take a photograph of it for the medical press?”
The girl was fed up and could not understand what all this was in aid of. ”You'd have a big navel if you'd been in the Salvation Army for as many years as I have.”
This only heightened the mystery. ”The Salvation Army? - what's that got to do with it?”
”I carried the banner for ten years!”
And you have been carrying the banner for millions of lives - so the navel has become very big. The unconsciousness is all your biography; all that you know about yourself is nothing but unconsciousness. So even when a ray of light enters, first you cannot trust it. Maybe you are looking at a dream? illusion? projection? Maybe there is some trick in it! Even if you trust it, it looks so small against your great past that you cannot trust that it is going to help in any way.
But let me tell you one thing: a small candle is more powerful than ALL the darkness upon all the planets. Darkness has no power; darkness is impotent. A small candle is potential - BECAUSE IT IS! Darkness is just an absence.
A man came to the surgery covered with blood and bruises. ”What is the matter?” said the doctor.
”It's my wife - another of her nightmares.”
”Don't talk daft man! She might have kicked you, but not these injuries.”
”Listen doc,shehadoneofhernightmares: sheshoutedout,'Getout,quick-myhusbandiscoming home!' And me being only half awake, naturally, I jumped straightoutofthe window.”
It is a long, old habit of being unconscious. But look at that'some degree of awareness', focus yourself on it - that is your hope. Through that small ray opens the door. Can't you see it? You ask me: ”What is new?”
The sixth question:
Question 6
I AM A CATHOLIC CHRISTIAN. I LOVE YOUR TALKS, BUT WHEN YOU SAY SOMETHING WHICH GOES AGAINST MY RELIGION THEN I AM TERRIBLY UPSET. WHAT SHOULD I DO?
THEREARETHREETHINGS:first,onlylistentothatwhichsuitsyou;don'tlisten tothatwhich goes against you. That's what many are doing, otherwise it is going to be a rough journey. But when you are here listening, it is difficult - how to avoid that? In fact, before you know it is against you, you have listened to it.
Thenyou needtodosomething which professorsknowhowtodo,pundits,scholarsknowhowtodo. When you listen to something which goes against you, first: think that it is trivial; it does not matter; it is not very relevant; it does not change your mind. It is a small thing! Maybe a little difference in the details, but basically Osho agrees with you. Keep that in the mind.
It happened:
A woman went to the doctor and complained she could not get passionate. The doctor examined her, and told her that if she would follow his special diet she would get very randy. This was agreed, but after a few weeks she was back and said, ”There's something gone wrong! Last night I got so passionate I chewed my boyfriend's ear off.”
”Oh, don't worry about that trifle,” said the doctor, ”it's only protein - no carbohydrates.”
This is the first way: that only in small details... it is nothing very important. You need not worry. That will help you and you will not get so upset.
The second thing is: interpret it - mm? - that's what Saraha goes on saying: Be interpretative! Interpret it in such a way that it comes closer to your idea. That can always be done; a little skill is need. A little logic, a little play with words that's all. It is not much of a problem; you can manage it. If you have really been a Catholic it will not be difficult at all.
Listen to this:
The Irish navvies were digging the road outside a house full of made-up floozies. A parson came along, pulled down his hat and went in. Says Pat to Mike, ”Did you see that! Just what you'd expect with one of them parsons!”
Soon after, a rabbi arrived, turned up his collar, and in he went. Says Mike to Pat, ”Is it not a terrible thing that the priest of God's Own People should go in there!”
Lastly a Catholic priest arrived, wrapped his cloak round his head, and dived quickly into the bawdy house.
”Pat, isn't that dreadful now, to think that one of the girls must have been taken ill.”
This is an interpretation. When the rabbi goes, it is something else; when the priest goes, it is something else; when the Catholic priest arrives... you can change the interpretation. There is no problem in it: now some girl seems to be ill.
This is the second way to avoid me.
And the third way is: think that this guy here is mad. That is the surest of all - if nothing else works, that works. Just think that this man is mad! Only a madman can say things against Catholicism. That will help you, and will not upset you at all.
The newly appointed priest thought he'd walk this vast parish and meet the flock. One day he followed a dusty track for miles to find a devout family with fourteen children.
”Good day, Connelly, you're a credit to Ireland - the biggest family in the parish.”
”Good day, father, butthis is notthe biggestfamilyin the parish -that'sDoylan, overthe hill.”
Itwasatired priestwho greeted Doylan and hissixteen children... but”God blessall these eighteen little Catholics,” he said.
”Sorry father, but this is a Protestant family!”
”Then I'll go at once,” said the priest, ”for it's nothing but a dirty sex maniac that ye are!”
IfIgo with you,”this man is great”; ifIdon'tgo with you think”this man is mad”-thatwill help you.
These are the tricks others are playing and not getting upset. Now you know the secrets... you can do that too.
But if your whole effort is not to get upset, then why are you here? My whole effort here is to make you as much upsetas possible. Then why go with me atall? Unless Iupsetyou,Icannottransform you. Unless I destroy you, I cannot create you. Unless I am very drastic, there is no way, no hope for you.
ItismycompassionthatIgoon hammering onyourhead -becausethatistheonlyway! And Ihave to hammertoo much: whatcan Ido? -you have such thickheads. Something upsets you because something true comes into your vision; otherwise it will not upset you.
Always remember: anything upsetting you is valuable... think over it, meditate over it. Allow it to have its whole say. Contemplate over it. Let it be there present in your being long so that you can look at it from all the angles possible - because something upsetting simply means that something has made you aware that whatsoever you have been believing up to now is just a lie. Only truth upsets. Only truth destroys because only truth can create.
I am a chaos... and if you are really going to be with me, you have to pass through chaos. That's what Saraha says, that's what Tantra is all about - destructuring, taking your character away, taking your ideology away, TAKING YOUR MIND AWAY! It is surgical.
I am helpless. I have to do it. And I know it is a very thankless job.
The last question:
Question 7
WHAT IS SAMSARA?
The samsara is this story:
The London fog was swirling over the Thames as a young tramp settled himself on the embankment for the night. Suddenly he was roused by a gentle voice and looking up saw a beautiful brunette alighting from her chauffeur-driven Rolls Royce.
”My poor man,” she said, ”you must be terribly cold and wet. Let me drive you to my home and put you up for the night.”
Of course, the tramp didn't refuse this invitation and climbed into the car beside her. After a short drive the car stopped before a large Victorian mansion and the brunette stepped out, beckoning the tramp to followher. The door was opened by the butler,into whose charge the lady gave the tramp, with instructions that he should be given a meal, a bath and a comfortable bed in the servants' quarters.
Some while later, as the brunette was preparing to retire, it occurred to her that her guest might be in need of something, so, slipping on her negligee, she hurried along to the servants' wing. As she rounded the corner a chink of light met her eye, indicating that the young man was awake. Knocking softly on the door she entered the room and inquired of the young man why he was not sleeping.
”Surely you are not hungry?”
”Oh no, your butler fed me royally.”
”Then perhaps your bed is not comfortable?”
”But it is - soft and warm.”
”Then you must need company. Move over a little ”